Chapter 3


I raced back to my two family house , then fell back onto my couch. I felt tears swelling up into my eyes, 'Fuck, Fuck, Fuck.' I whispered then bit down on my lower lip. I grabbed my phone from my pocket, then dialed Warrick's number.


'Brown.'


'Warrick, could come over.' I said desperately trying to sound normal, but then sniffled back my tears.


'Sara? Hun what's wrong? Are you OK?


'No, I'm not OK war.' I half laughed.


'I'll be over as soon as I can.' I heard Warrick fumbling with something.


'OK, bye Warrick.' I hung up the phone, then made my stumbled over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of Tequila. I started drinking it down fast then sat down cross legged on the couch, staring at a blank spot on the wall. I kept on drinking, with an occasional blink here and there. Warrick knocked on the door, 'Come in.' I said in a daze, with another drink. Warrick came in then, kneeled down next to me.


'Sara, hun what's wrong.'


I muffled something, then was about to take down some more Tequila but Warrick took the bottle from me. 'I wasn't done with that.'


'Yes, you are.' I reached over for the bottle but ended up falling off the couch. I started crying into my knees, and felt Warrick's arms around me. I wrapped my arms around him, still crying.


'Oh, Sar.' He rubbed my back as I cried. After about ten minutes I stopped crying [sort of]. I pulled away from him and sat up against the back of the couch, still on the floor. 'Sar what's wrong sweetie?' He brushed my hair out of my face.


'It's a long story War.'


'You called me over to tell me something. Why don't you tell me?'


'OK.' I wiped the remaining tears from my eyes then rested my head onto his shoulder. I explained to him how Nick and I have been sleeping together for a while. I told him about the rules and how I felt about them. 'And then today, I went over to see him. He told me that he loved me.'


'Why are you so afraid of love, Sara?'



'Your going to think that I'm crazy.'


'You are not crazy. Don't ever let anyone think that you are. Because your not.' I laid my head down on Warrick's lap and closed my eyes as he ran his fingers threw my hair.


'Catherine loves Lindsey, anyone could tell you that. But at one point she loved Eddie too. When she caught Eddie cheating on her, that hurt her. She was just so sad and depressed because she loved Eddie, and Eddie broke that love.'


'So Catherine's just that reason? There must be something more. Your parents love you, what about them?'


I laughed at the thought of my parents, 'They always say, I love you, to me whenever I talk to them. Even when I was growing up they told me, but I don't feel there love. They don't do anything to show me. It's like I know they love me, I just don't feel there love.'


'So in part your afraid of the unknown.'


'In part I guess.'


'Sara, here at the lab everyone is a family in someway. Grissom and Catherine are the parents, Nick's my brother, along with Greg, and you're my baby sister. We all love you, and would be so upset if anything ever happened to you. Grissom, Catherine, Greg and I love you Sar, but we're not in love with you. I love you in a baby sister sort of way. Nick is in love with you.'


'Thanks Warrick.' I hugged him, 'But what am I going to do about Nick?'


'You have to figure out if your in love with him. I know that you care about him, but loving him is at another level.'


'OK.' I whispered.


'You take the night off and relax. Then if you need anything call me. OK sweetie?'


'OK.' I got up off the floor and walked Warrick to the front door, 'Thank you so much Warrick.' I hugged him one last time then let him go.


'Call me later to tell me that your ok sometime before next shift.' He lingered his hands ast my side.


'I will, don't worry.' I kissed his cheek, then he left. I closed the door, then went into my bedroom and instantly fell asleep.