A few days later on the morning after Catherine's funeral Grissom received a phone call in the early hours of the morning. Lindsey's condition had and was continuing to deteriorate. He called Nick, Sara, Warrick and Greg, fearing the worst-case scenario. When he arrived he was met by Lindsey's nurse, Nancy.
"Thank God you're here"
"How bad is she? Honestly" Grissom asked
"Honestly I didn't think she'd last the time it took you to get here"
He entered the room and saw her there lying amongst the pillows, looking so innocent, he wondered how something like this could happen to something so pure. He sat down beside her bed and gazed at her face. She reminded him of an angel. He thoughts drifted to the fact that she may soon become one.
"Hey" Sara said poking her head around the door. He could see Nick, Warrick and Greg hovering anxiously in the background, "Can we come in?"
"Sure"
They all came in and crowded around Lindsey's bed. Sara looked at her and immediately burst into tears.
"This is all my fault. If I hadn't asked Cath to take me to the scene then she would be here, and Lindsey wouldn't be like this" she wailed
"You know something Sara?" Warrick said, his voice's volume rising dangerously, "I'm getting sick of saying that it's not your fault. It is your fault about Cath. Is that what you want to hear? But it's not you fault about Lindsey" And with that he turned and left the room. Greg shot a look at Grissom as if asking for his approval to follow Warrick. Grissom nodded his approval and Greg sprinted down the corridor to catch up with Warrick calling, "Hey Warrick, ma-man, wait up!"
Sara composed herself, "Lindsey I'm so sorry about what happened to your Mum. I know it's my fault. Will you ever forgive me?"
The only response she had was the heart monitor displaying a continuous line and consistent beeeeeeeeeeeeeep. She was gone. Free of the pain she had endured. Free to be with her mother.
Later that day Gil Grissom was sorting through his stepdaughter's belongings at the hospital. He came across 5 large cream envelopes. Each had the address of one of the members of the team. One for Greg, one for Nick and Sara, one for Warrick and one for himself. The fifth envelope was addressed to 'Sara and Nick's Baby". All were addressed in Lindsey's careful handwriting. He picked up Lindsey's suitcase and the letters and left the hospital. He arrived at CSI headquarters and distributed the letters to each addressee. Each of the addressee's went to a separate part of the lab to read their letter. They said as follows:
Hey Greggo,
You miss me? Thank you for being you in the last few months. I really appreciate that. You are always there when I need to be cheered up. I'll miss you loads
Love Lindsey
Dear Sara and Nick,
Sara, I don't think I'll ever get to tell you this, but it's not your fault about Mummy. It was just the type of person she was. She couldn't just stand there and watch you, and your baby, die. Now that you've heard that from me I hope you'll move on with your life and stop blaming yourself. I just have one favour to ask. Can you tell your baby about Mummy?
And Nick, look after Sara for me. I know she thinks it's her fault but please tell her that it isn't. I found this song very meaningful to me just after Mum died.
So there's an angel at your shoulder,and she is watching over youShe is fragile and small,and she is rarely in the newit's such a perfect viewshe sees everything you doSo it's no surprise she knows when I am in the room So if you see that angel you can tell her this for me... Chorus:Angel, I know you are a friendbut all good things come to an endso I think maybe you'll agree... Wings are such an asset,to an angel on the runAn essential part to play and,the role of the guardianBut everybody knows it ain't no secret what happensWhen an angel flies a little too close to the sun So if you see that angel you can tell her this for me... Chorus The angel gets what the angel wants x7 Woah... Angel I know you are a friendbut all good things come to an endSo you can leave in peace for meor you will leave here on your knees Angel I know you are a friendbut all good things come to an endSo you can leave in peace for me...
Love Lindsey
Dear Warrick,
I don't think I've ever told you how much your care and support means to me. You are always there when I needed you. A light amongst the darkness. Here are the lyrics of one of my favourite songs. It pretty much sums up how I feel sometimes
Sometimes it seems that I have no place.
And I don't know what to do, with myself.
Night after another, I can taste the filth inside.
And I need to reclense my soul.
Nobody knows, nobody cares that I die, on the inside.
Nobody sees the light that is me, as I smile on the outside.
Nobody knows, nobody cares that I walk, on the wrong side.
Tell me who..nobody.
Tell me who..nobody.
Tell me who..nobody.
But you.
All the friends that I've had, where are they now?
Guess I'm far too intense to be loved.
All the things that I hate, I hate about myself.
And I need to reclense my soul.
Nobody knows, nobody cares that I die, on the inside.
Nobody sees the light that is me, as I smile on the outside.
Nobody knows, nobody cares that I walk, on the wrong side.
Tell me who..nobody.
Tell me who..nobody.
Tell me who..nobody.
But you.
I have nobody, but you.
Nobody, nobody, but you.
Nobody knows, nobody cares that I die, on the inside.
Nobody sees the light that is me, as I smile on the outside.
Nobody knows, nobody cares that I walk, on the wrong side.
Nobody knows and nobody cares but you.
Nobody knows and nobody cares but you.
Love Lindsey
Dear Uncle Gil,
You are like a father to me. You always have been, ever before you and Mummy got married. Don't cry because I'm gone but smile because I was there.
Love Lindsey
All the CSI's were reading their letters with tears in their eyes. They were still coming to terms with losing her, but she seemed so prepared.
9 years later…
Casey Stokes was on spring vacation and had decided to clean up the attic. She wasn't exactly cleaning. Her mum, Sara, had told her that she could have her room up there, on the condition that she cleaned it out. She had it about half done and was passing boxes down to her Dad, Nick. She was about to pass down a large brown paper envelope when she noticed the label, 'Letters from Lindsey'.
"You ok Casey" he dad called up the stairs
"Yes Dad"
"I'll go and grab us some snacks"
"Ok Dad"
She heard him leave and sat down in a cleared a floor and opened the envelope. Two cream envelopes fell into her lap. One was addressed to her parents. She opened the envelope, and read it quickly. At once questions began to form in her mind. 'Who was Lindsey?' 'What wasn't her parents fault', 'Was she the baby?' She turned her attention to the other envelope and noticed it was addressed to, 'Sara and Nick's Baby'. She opened it quickly and immediately noticed the date. It was dated as being written 9 years ago. Her curiosity got the better of her and she began read its contents.
Dear Sara and Nick's baby,
I know that when you read this letter you won't be a baby anymore, but I don't know your name. My name is Lindsey Willows. I'm 10 years old and have leukaemia. My Mum is Catherine Willows. You probably know that she died keeping your Mum who was pregnant with you, safe. Why she did what she did, I had regrets about. I thought about how I'd have to live without her, but as it happens I'll probably be seeing here sooner than I thought. I hope Sara told you about what happened and that this didn't come as a shock to you. Below are the lyrics of a song I find very moving and I hope they will mean something to you.
Ever closed your eyes
Ever stop and listen
Ever feel alive and there's nothing missing
You don't need a reason
Let the day go on and on
Let the rain fall down
Everywhere around you
Give into it now
Let your day surround you
You don't need a reason
Let the rain go on and on
Only take the time
From the helter skelter
Every day you find
Everything's in kilter
You don't need a reason
Let the day go on and on
Every summer sun
Every winter evening
Every spring to come
Every autumn leaving
You don't need a reason
Let it all go on and on
Life is a wonderful thing. Live it to the full
Love Lindsey
Casey finished reading the letter and climbed down the ladder to see her parents. She found her Mum reading in the living room. She cuddled up against her. Sara glanced at what her daughter was holding in her hands. She was about to say something when Casey spoke.
"Mummy… Can you tell me about Catherine and Lindsey?
THE END
Thank you to everyone who reviewed the story. I know it probably isn't the ending everyone wanted but please review anyway. Pretty please???