Chapter Six:

The pair skipped to Hermione's bed, shook her awake, and then skipped down the stairs, too excited to wait for her. They also skipped out the portrait hole and then skipped all the way to the Entrance Hall. They stopped and waited for the rest of their friends. Then Hermione, Ron, Harry, Lee, George, and Fred came down the hall and they all skipped (lol *tries to imagine the whole group skipping past the Slytherin table* LOL!) to their table. Once they were seated the food appeared. Noodlez and Duckie scarfed down their waffles and orange juice, then they grabbed their school bags and schedules, and THEN ran (yes...not skipped...) into the hallway.

"Uh oh, oh no-e-no!" sang Duckie in a quacking sort of way, to live up to her namesake.

"Eh?" replied Noodlez.

"We've got double potions with Slytherin first!" screamed Duckie.

Noodlez looked at her schedule...then at her watch.

"We better get going! It starts soon!" she cried.

Duckie gawked at Noodlez. Since when did she WANT to go to class? Noodlez looked into her empty school bag as Duckie trotted off towards the dungeons. She grinned as she thought "We've got no school supplies, Duckie, mdear...heh...oh well!" (*o not THAT again...*)

Only minutes later....!

Ron, Hermione, Harry, Noodlez, and Duckie all sat in the back of the classroom watching Professor Snape explain the first lesson that the two new students ever attended.

"Directions are on the board. Ingredients are in the cabinets. You may begin."

Duckie looked at the floor in front of herself...SHE DIDNT HAVE A CAULDRON! She looked at Noodlez who was sitting there, watching Hermione and smiling because she obviously had known they couldn't do their school work, so that was her hurry to attend class! Duckie reddened in anger but began to sweat as Snape approached her...

"Well, well, well. We have a student with no cauldron..."

"Meep," replied Duckie.

"Where's your cauldron?" he asked venomously.

"Meep," said Duckie again.

Snape grinned and turned to Noodlez saying, "And you... you haven't got one either--why are you grinning? You NEED a cauldron to participate you realize! And you must participate to pass!"

Noodlez just hummed.

"What will you use as a cauldron? Hmmmm?!"

"Well," Noodlez drawled, "I was thinking about..."

"Oho! Thinking! That is indeed something new for a Gryfindor!" sneered Snape.

Noodlez growled, "As I was SAYING!" she shouted. "I was THINKING about using your HEAD! I mean...its already hollow!" she spat.

Snape stared at her in shock, "50 points from Gr--"

"Silencio!" interrupted Noodlez. Snape found himself unable to speak.

Hermione nearly fainted.

"DO YOU REALIZE WHAT YOU'VE DONE?! YOU ATTACKED A TEACHER! ON YOUR FIRST DAY!" Hermione screamed at Noodlez.

"Heh," replied the pasta-y one (lol?). "We don't have school supplies. Me and Duckie need 'ta go to Diagon Alley!"

Noodlez stood, grabbed Duckie's wrist, and dragged her out of the classroom.

"Woa...," said Ron. "Wait 'til Fred and George hear about THIS!"

Meanwhile...

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[scene: okay all you readers out there, I don't know about you but this whole "scene:" dealy is getting on MY nerves! So I think u can handle figuring it out for yourself!]

Duckie and Noodlez were on their way across the lawns to Hagrid's cabin (see, u silly readers, that wasn't too difficult to figure out, was it now?). They figured they'd better get a wizard to go along with them to Diagon Alley.

"Who's there?" Hagrid shouted over Fang's barks as they knocked on his door.

"Noodlez and Duckie of Gryfindor House," said Duckie formally while Noodlez absentmindedly stuck her finger in her ear humming "The Anthem" by Good Charlotte (had to put that in there Noodlez dear!).

"Oh yeah," said Hagrid opening the door. "Harry, Ron, and Hermione told me abou' you lot. Ron's quite smitten' wit' ya there, Duckie."

"I know," said Duckie with a grin. "But he's Hermione's feller and I ain't here to steal him. I love Hermione and Ron too much to split 'em up and Harry too much to give him a headache."

"That's good to 'ere," said Hagrid. "Now what can I do fer you two?"

"We need to go to Diagon Alley and buy some school supplies," explained Duckie because Noodlez was busy with her humming and never liked to be interrupted while humming. "Would you like to come along?"

"Sure!" said Hagrid cheerfully, throwing on his moleskin overcoat. "Lemme get me Floo powder and we'll be there faster then you can say 'fliberty jibbet!' "

Duckie was wondering why anyone would WANT to say the words "fliberty jibbet" when Noodlez dashed into the flames where Hagrid was pouring the Floo Powder.

"OWWW!!" shouted Noodlez. "IT'S FREAKIN' HOT!"

"He didn't put any Floo Powder in yet, Noodlez!" Duckie explained, clearing away her burns with a wave of her wand (Duckie is quite like Hermione [or used to be] when it comes to studying). "Wait until the flames are green!"

"Yes, but will they TASTE green?" asked Noodlez worriedly.

She did not like the taste of green, but preferred pink and black tasting things.

"I don't know, Noodlez, we'll see," said Duckie while Hagrid wondered aloud about the sanity of his traveling companions.

"Okay, righ' now," said Hagrid. "Noodlez, you go first, Duckie you follow 'er, and I'll go last."

Noodlez got into the grate but instead of shouting "Diagon Alley!" like she was supposed to, she shouted, "GRAVY!" and disappeared.

"Oh no!" said the Duck. "Hagrid, where is 'Gravy' at exactly? Can we save her....again?"

"I dunno, I ain't neva heard of no 'Gravy' befo'," he said, scratching his hairy head. "But we hafta go save 'er, she's my responsibility!"

"Right, well then I'll go to 'Gravy' first and you follow right after, okay?"

"Alrigh' then," he agreed. Duckie stepped into the green flames (which tasted blue not black, pink, or green) and said loudly and clearly, "Gravy!"

She felt the whole world spin and landed surprising quickly in Professor Umbridge's fireplace.

"Her password is 'gravy'?" Duckie thought allowed.

"Of course!" said Noodlez obviously, who was searching through Umbridge's desk. "Everyone knows that 'Umbridge' means 'gravy' in pig latin!"

"It does?" asked Duckie, dusting herself off.

"No, not really, I just took a lucky guess," confessed Noodlez.

"Why did you wanna come here?" asked the Duck. "Its far too lacy for my liking."

"Same here, but I wanted to see if I could find something," said Noodlez.

"What?" asked Duckie (man, I ask a lot of questions!).

"Her diary!" said Noodlez as she pulled it out of her desk drawer triumphantly.

"Bloody smashing, Noodlez!" said the Duck happily. "Let's see.........'Dear Diary, Today I took over Hogwarts. It was great fun! I think I'll buy some new lacy table clothes as a congratulations-for-taking-over-Hogwarts gift to myself.' Ewwwwwwww! More lace?"

"Suppose so," said the noodle-y one. "Look at this one! 'Dear Diary, Today I got trampled over by billions of centaurs! And no one came to rescue me for hours and hours! Well, except the blasted Poltergiest, who came for the hourly "throw everything within reach at Professor Umbridge" ceremony....if I wasn't being thrown out of Hogwarts then I'd have him killed.' He's already dead, you dumb ass!" Noodlez added to the book.

Noodlez and Duckie had a great time reading the diary and eventually memorized the entire thing. Then the went down the Great Hall for lunch. As they were eating, they told the rest of the Gryfindors about the diary and everything that was in it. They were just getting to the part about the affair she was having with Mr. Filch (who was married to his cat, Mrs. Norris), when Professor Dumbledore overheard them because he happened to be walking by.

"I'm sorry girls, but that was being kept a secret so that we could read it to the entire school at the end of term feast. Since you've spoiled the secret, I guess we have to expel you."

Duckie looked shocked as Noodlez shouted, "It took you long enough! I didn't think we'd make it to lunch!"

"A new record!" said Duckie.

"I shall get Fawkes down here. You have five minutes to say your goodbyes," said Dumbledore.

Noodlez ran over to Fred and George and asked for a Skiving Snack Box, which would come in handy in High School. Duckie said goodbye to Ginny and told her to take care of Harry and break up with Dean (she didn't listen). And then the two of them turned around to look at Harry, Ron, and Hermione, whom they had been though so much with over the past 48 hours. Duckie began to cry a little, and Noodlez did too. While Noodlez hugged Harry and Hermione, Duckie gave Ron a kiss on the cheek and told him to "Ask Hermione out, you nit wit! before I change my mind!". Then Noodlez hugged Ron and Duckie hugged Harry tight (I always say he needs a hug!) and Hemione too.

"Okay, it's time for you to go," said McGonagall, who was holding Fawkes and looking relieved that she didn't have to have Noodlez and Duckie in any of her classes.

"Bye! I love you all!!!!!" shouted Duckie to the entire hall.

"Never forget the Sorting Poptart!" shouted Noodlez. "And always use mouthwash after using Floo Powder because it tastes like blue!"

"GET GOING!" shouted McGonagall.

And so the two friends, one crying harder than ever and one shouting silly bits advice to the hall (you can guess which is which) grabbed a hold of Fawkes' tail and soon Hogwarts was out of sight. They landed a few hours later with a soft "thump" in Duckie's front yard. They patted Fawkes goodbye and he flew off, and the two went inside. They sat on the couch, wondering what to do next.

"What do you wanna do?" asked the Duck.

"Eat some oreos," said Noodlez, which always her reply to such questions.

"Okay," said Duckie. "Then what?"

Noodlez thought hard about it and said....... "Change Floo Powder so that it tastes more like pink and send a Howler to the giant squid!"

"I think we may need a few more bags of Oreos to accomplish that!" said Duckie simply.

THE END :-P

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BOO HOO

*sniffs*
BUT NEVER FEAR!! FOR WE ARE WRITING ANOTHER STORY! IT WILL HAVE THE SAME NAME!! IT WILL BE CALLED:

Harry Potter and the Return of the OFG

Au Revoir! A tout a l'heure!