Charlie's POV
I knew Banksie didn't have any trust in me anymore, that I had beaten all of it out of him months before. He had little to no faith left in me, in us and that killed me. I don't know how he managed to make me fall so in love with him, but I was. I hadn't missed a single AA meeting or anger management session for fear of letting him down. I'd even gotten a new god, driving the Zamboni at the local skating rink. Luckily I was better at that ten Jess, Fulton and Guy, and better at it then I was at driving my car. I was on my way to getting life back to normal, I wanted things back on track.
I sat in Adam's Porsche that day longer the I should've when he brought me home. We were in the parking lot ten minutes while I debated the idea of kissing him, inviting him up or anything at all the would keep the 'not date' from ending there. Finally I just settled on goodbye.
"Thanks for the ride, I had a good time."
"Me too." His lips and cheeks lifted into a gentle smile. "I'll talk to you later?"
"Yeah, I'll call you. Umm have fun at work." As I exited the car I came to the conclusion I had just given the worst farewell ever. Oh well there was always tomorrow.
I was attacked by the emptiness of my dorm room as soon as I opened the door. It was the same room Adam and I had shared not long before that. The same window we stared out while holding each other tightly while watching the stars, the same TV we use to sit in front of and not pay attention to whatever movie was playing because we were with one another, lastly and most painfully the same beds we made love in. It was like my curse everyday waking alone in that screaming silent room. I could hardly take it, that worst part of it all being that they wouldn't assign me a new roommate until the next year just incase Banks decided he wanted to come back, which I knew he wouldn't.
I wondered over to my dressed and pulled open my top draw, under all my socks, boxes and a pair of leopard brief Banks bought me for our two month anniversary, was a small velvet box. I pulled it out and slowly walked over to my bed. My thumbs ran over the top gliding on the material before I brought myself to opening it. The ring inside was nothing great by most people standards, just a simple silver Claddah ring, it wasn't even engraved. But that little piece of metal meant more to me then the world. Hans had left it to me in his will and it had sat comfy and cozy in a safety deposit box waiting over four years to see the light of day again. I knew the fact that it was so important to me would make it even more special to Banks, if I ever got around to giving it to him.
I remembered the day I went down to the bank to pick it up, I got some flowers on the way home. I was practically walking on air that whole day, then I got back to school and found Banksie gone. That ring had been sitting in that draw since. I don't know why I never wore it, I guess a part of me was still holding onto the hope that one day I'd find the right time to offer it to him, along with my heart. If I could just get things back the way they were suppose to be.
I remembered when I was younger I used to imagine what it would be like when I purposed, who the girl would be. In my wildest dreams I never thought the recipient of the ring would be Banksie. But then I never dreamed I'd ever meet someone that I would love more deeply then him either.
There was a message on the answering machine from mom when I checked it and at first I wondered why she didn't just say what she had to while I was at the diner. Then I figured it out, she didn't want me to throw a fit and cause a scene in the middle of the restaurant, which I would've had I known.
'Charlie it's mom if you're there pick up… Okay well I guess you're not back yet, Adam must drive real slow. Anyway I just called to tell you that I want you to come over for dinner on Friday. I'm making a brown sugar ham, you're favorite. Paul and Guy are coming too, I'd really like for you and Guy to work out your problems. You were such good friends when you were little. And there's no way short of death that I'm letting you out of this, be here at five. Love you. Bye.'
I'm sure you're wondering why that would have caused me to explode in public right? Well let me start with asking if you know who Paul is? No clue? Paul was, still is, Paul Germaine, Guy's dad. Very uncool. Guy and I weren't even on speaking terms and my mother was boinking his father. Talk about screwed up.
Before I knew it, it was Friday. The week usually dragged on but because I didn't want to go to that damn dinner it days passed it what seemed like a matter of hours. I can honestly that was the most uncomfortable evening I'd ever encountered. I hated the idea of my mom being with anyone but coach Bombay almost as much as I hated the idea of him being with a lady that wasn't my mother. Plus Guy knew about me taking the money from the register at Jan's shop, he never turned me in but from the death glares he was giving me, I kind of wish he had. So lets put it this way, I spent the entire night feeling an unhealthy mixture of angry (about mom and Paul, guilty (about the money) and lonely (without my Adam). By the time I left I was about ready to a) punch someone in the face or b) hang myself. Then to top it all off, I missed the bus and had to walk the hour back to campus, not fun.
I was sitting in my dorm room on the verge of going off when I remembered the bottle of Schnapps that was in the desk draw. I hadn't taken a sip of it in months, I just kept it as a reminder, the forbidden frontier. I felt like a peddler as I scampered over the carpet and removed the draw from it's hole and cradled the liquor bottle in my hands. The brownish glass was smooth in my hand and the smell alone was intoxicating. Just as the booze touched my tongue something in the corner of my room caught my eye, Hans's ring. I could have sworn I had put it back in the draw days before, but there it sat on my night stand, the silver shimmering as the moon rays danced off it. I got good distance when I spit that alcohol from my mouth, it tagged to adjacent wall. Adam had never let my down in all the years I'd known him save once and I wasn't about to let him down. Another drink wasn't ever going to touch my mouth, my lips were only there to kiss him from then on. I had to save our love, the was the dream I'd be chasing.
I knew Banksie didn't have any trust in me anymore, that I had beaten all of it out of him months before. He had little to no faith left in me, in us and that killed me. I don't know how he managed to make me fall so in love with him, but I was. I hadn't missed a single AA meeting or anger management session for fear of letting him down. I'd even gotten a new god, driving the Zamboni at the local skating rink. Luckily I was better at that ten Jess, Fulton and Guy, and better at it then I was at driving my car. I was on my way to getting life back to normal, I wanted things back on track.
I sat in Adam's Porsche that day longer the I should've when he brought me home. We were in the parking lot ten minutes while I debated the idea of kissing him, inviting him up or anything at all the would keep the 'not date' from ending there. Finally I just settled on goodbye.
"Thanks for the ride, I had a good time."
"Me too." His lips and cheeks lifted into a gentle smile. "I'll talk to you later?"
"Yeah, I'll call you. Umm have fun at work." As I exited the car I came to the conclusion I had just given the worst farewell ever. Oh well there was always tomorrow.
I was attacked by the emptiness of my dorm room as soon as I opened the door. It was the same room Adam and I had shared not long before that. The same window we stared out while holding each other tightly while watching the stars, the same TV we use to sit in front of and not pay attention to whatever movie was playing because we were with one another, lastly and most painfully the same beds we made love in. It was like my curse everyday waking alone in that screaming silent room. I could hardly take it, that worst part of it all being that they wouldn't assign me a new roommate until the next year just incase Banks decided he wanted to come back, which I knew he wouldn't.
I wondered over to my dressed and pulled open my top draw, under all my socks, boxes and a pair of leopard brief Banks bought me for our two month anniversary, was a small velvet box. I pulled it out and slowly walked over to my bed. My thumbs ran over the top gliding on the material before I brought myself to opening it. The ring inside was nothing great by most people standards, just a simple silver Claddah ring, it wasn't even engraved. But that little piece of metal meant more to me then the world. Hans had left it to me in his will and it had sat comfy and cozy in a safety deposit box waiting over four years to see the light of day again. I knew the fact that it was so important to me would make it even more special to Banks, if I ever got around to giving it to him.
I remembered the day I went down to the bank to pick it up, I got some flowers on the way home. I was practically walking on air that whole day, then I got back to school and found Banksie gone. That ring had been sitting in that draw since. I don't know why I never wore it, I guess a part of me was still holding onto the hope that one day I'd find the right time to offer it to him, along with my heart. If I could just get things back the way they were suppose to be.
I remembered when I was younger I used to imagine what it would be like when I purposed, who the girl would be. In my wildest dreams I never thought the recipient of the ring would be Banksie. But then I never dreamed I'd ever meet someone that I would love more deeply then him either.
There was a message on the answering machine from mom when I checked it and at first I wondered why she didn't just say what she had to while I was at the diner. Then I figured it out, she didn't want me to throw a fit and cause a scene in the middle of the restaurant, which I would've had I known.
'Charlie it's mom if you're there pick up… Okay well I guess you're not back yet, Adam must drive real slow. Anyway I just called to tell you that I want you to come over for dinner on Friday. I'm making a brown sugar ham, you're favorite. Paul and Guy are coming too, I'd really like for you and Guy to work out your problems. You were such good friends when you were little. And there's no way short of death that I'm letting you out of this, be here at five. Love you. Bye.'
I'm sure you're wondering why that would have caused me to explode in public right? Well let me start with asking if you know who Paul is? No clue? Paul was, still is, Paul Germaine, Guy's dad. Very uncool. Guy and I weren't even on speaking terms and my mother was boinking his father. Talk about screwed up.
Before I knew it, it was Friday. The week usually dragged on but because I didn't want to go to that damn dinner it days passed it what seemed like a matter of hours. I can honestly that was the most uncomfortable evening I'd ever encountered. I hated the idea of my mom being with anyone but coach Bombay almost as much as I hated the idea of him being with a lady that wasn't my mother. Plus Guy knew about me taking the money from the register at Jan's shop, he never turned me in but from the death glares he was giving me, I kind of wish he had. So lets put it this way, I spent the entire night feeling an unhealthy mixture of angry (about mom and Paul, guilty (about the money) and lonely (without my Adam). By the time I left I was about ready to a) punch someone in the face or b) hang myself. Then to top it all off, I missed the bus and had to walk the hour back to campus, not fun.
I was sitting in my dorm room on the verge of going off when I remembered the bottle of Schnapps that was in the desk draw. I hadn't taken a sip of it in months, I just kept it as a reminder, the forbidden frontier. I felt like a peddler as I scampered over the carpet and removed the draw from it's hole and cradled the liquor bottle in my hands. The brownish glass was smooth in my hand and the smell alone was intoxicating. Just as the booze touched my tongue something in the corner of my room caught my eye, Hans's ring. I could have sworn I had put it back in the draw days before, but there it sat on my night stand, the silver shimmering as the moon rays danced off it. I got good distance when I spit that alcohol from my mouth, it tagged to adjacent wall. Adam had never let my down in all the years I'd known him save once and I wasn't about to let him down. Another drink wasn't ever going to touch my mouth, my lips were only there to kiss him from then on. I had to save our love, the was the dream I'd be chasing.