Keladry In Wonderland
Down The Rabbit Hole
Disclaimer: *cough* Ahem! I don't own the characters, Tamora Pierce does. I don't own Alice in Wonderland, Lewis Carroll does. And I am not the first person to write a wonderland fic. I just did a search and 'not so faerie L' wrote one first…
Sitting in Etiquette Keladry of Mindelan was bord out of her mind. All third years had to learn this stuff, even if it was about as exciting as watching paint grow.
Kel's eyes were drooping and her head was nodding when she spotted something out of the corner of her eyes. Suddenly wide-awake, Kel turned and stared at Neal. His normally cute ears were growing longer and longer and a tail was sprouting out of the back of his pants.
"Neal! What's wrong? Are you OK?"
"Nothing's wrong my dear! What are you talking about?" He asked, twitching his nose. Sudden he jumped up "Oh my! I'm late! I'm late! Quick I'm late!" He sprung up and ran out of the classroom.
Kel sprung up too and followed him. She saw him pause at the end of the hallway and take a sundial out of his wait coat pocket. Since when did Neal where a wast coat? She thought as she ran after him. And when did sundials start working inside?
"Neal! Get back here! We're supposed to be in class!" When she turned a corner she saw Neal jump into a hole in the wall.
Kel stoped and thought should I go after him? I better, someone has to save him…. we are both in serious trouble! Before she jumped after him.
She tumbled through and landed with a crash on the other inside. Looking around Kel saw she had landed in a room full of jars or Orange Marmalade. She was covered in the stuff because she had broken so many jars when she had fallen in.
"Great! I'm heading beck for a bath before I go after Neal, if I'm gonna get in trouble for skipping classes I'm going to do it clean!" But when she turned to where the hole had been there was just more shelves of marmalade. There was nothing else in the room except a tunnel.
Because there was nowhere else to go Kel started walking down the tunnel. Turning around a corner she caught a glimpse of her bunny-friend.
"Oh my beautiful hair and green eyes, how late it is getting!" He cried as he ran.
"Neal! Get back here!" She yelled. "You got me covered in Orange Marmalade!!! Do you know how much I hate that stuff?" He ran off and when she turned the next corner he was nowhere in site.
Seeing as there was nowhere else that he could have gone Kel kept following the tunnel. She wanted to find Neal and make him…. explain…. With the help of many sharp implements…she really hated orange marmalade…
After walking for a while Kel found her self in a low room lit by smelly lamps hanging from the walls. There were doors all around but after checking, Kel found they were all locked. In the middle of the room she spotted a three-legged table.
She walked up to it and picked up a key that was lying on the top. She decided to try it out in all the doors, it didn't fit any but on her second circuit Kel spotted and really little door about two feet high. She bent down and opened it with the key.
Looking out she saw a beautiful garden. Thinking anyplace would be better then this stinking, stuffy room Kel tried to fit her marmalade-covered head through. After much pushing and ear hurting she realised she couldn't. She walked beck to the table and saw that there was now a little bottle of something labelled 'Drink Me' on it.
"What the? That's like writing 'Plunge me into your heart' on a knife…" She muttered as she went to turn away.
"I said DRINK ME damn it!!!!" Screamed the little bottle as it sprung up from the table and forced itself into her mouth. Kel gagged and tried to spit it out but the liquid had already forced its way down her throat. Kel then started to shrink!
"God's curse it!" She yelled as she shrunk. But she instantly cheered up when she relished she was just the right height to fix in the door. She walked up to it. Seeing it was locked again she took the key out of her pocket and opened the door. She was about to walk through when a voice called out behind her.
"What the hell do you think your doing? You not supposed to have the key!" Yelled a very little cake with the words 'Eat me' written on the top in icing. "You're supposed to leave the key on the table and have to eat me to get it! Just cut me out of the story why don't you?"
"I'm sorry." Said Kel "But let me get this straight, you want me to eat you?"
"Well when you put to that way, not really…"
"Nope, To late." Said Kel as she snatched up the cake and swallowed it whole.
Authors Note: But paint doesn't grow I here you all say! I answer; Exactly! Anyway, *blink* that was weird…but that is not the point. The point is, was it funny? Please review and tell me! I should have the next chapter up soon (Soon for me, anywhere between 1 day and 6 months….) if no one reviews I'll still write more just to spite you all! Mwahahahahahahahahah! Thanks for reading!
P.S. This might make slightly more sense if you go and read the real Alice in Wonderland (again?)…*Scratches head* only slightly but….