Already on chapter nine. By this time, probably the only people reviewing are the ones who already know of this fic, or the ones who have second to nothing to do with their time, seeing as practically no one just pics up a nine chapter story and reads it. At least, that's my view and you may see it differently. Now then, I believe my objectives were to make new waves for Yami, find out about Seto's love interest, and there was one other main thing... I can't put my finger on it because i don' remember, but it has something to do with the 'seduce Jounouchi project.' It'll come to me while writing, but while I do so, I just thought... that mural of Bakura's must be pretty big... I might have him on a ladder drawing on the ceiling later, but I'll decide that later. Now, time for chapter 9!!!
Chapter 9
Malik held onto Kaiba's neck, but there was no response. Malik knew he sensed it, but didn't want to acknowledge it and hoped it was just a bad premonition. He was almost sure now, though, that it was true. Kaiba was in love with someone else. it had been kind of him to try to cover up who it was by joking around with the whole mirror theory, but Malik didn't want to joke around anymore. He wanted to know who could possibly be the one taking his Seto away from him.
That, of course, is an awfully dramatic way to start a story, so I'll leave that whole predicament for later on. As for the seduction crew, after a heavy make out session, Bakura had found the answer to winning Jounouchi for himself. Ishtar, of course, was more than obliged to help him, for he found the whole situation rather curious. Also, Jounouchi, though having very large hair, was by all means not unsexy, so having a kinky ol' time was far from a disgusting idea. The both of them began to walk up to the ever unknowing Jounouchi, who was looking at the wall in contentment. You see, they didn't have enough money to buy a TV so they had to use something else as a substitute while using their imaginations. Jounouchi began to laugh at the white wall, because it was making funny faces at him. This was when Ishtar and Bakura decided to pounce.
Yami sat in the corner staring enviously as Ishtar and Bakura tackled Jounouchi, drowning him in chocolate syrup. He had found out what had been going on between Ishtar and the other yami this morning. It doesn't take much thought when hearing two voices behind the counter going 'Mmph! Ah man, if we could only be in bed!' and 'Oh my! I know what YOU had for breakfast!' Yami had decided not to make a fuss, but was still very jealous of Jounouchi who had Ishtar's full attention, with him licking the chocolaty goodness off his cheek seductively. How could Jounouchi not want that? At the moment, the tall blonde was screaming his head off, and was in a panic attack or something.
"GET OFF OF ME! I'M NOT DIRTY!! LEAVE ME ALONE!! HHEEELLPP!!! SOMEBODY HELP ME!!! ACK, BAKURA KEEP YOUR HANDS AWAY FROM THERE! STOP TOUCHING MY ASS ISHTAR!!! I'M BEING BUTT RAPED I TELL YOU!!! BBBUUTTTTT RRRRAAAAAPPPEEDDD!!!!"
Yugi walked on over observing the situation, trying to understand clearly what was going on. Finally, he realized what was happening to his funny accented (if watching dub) friend.
"Oh! You guys are practicing those wrestling techniques like the ones we used to watch on the television! Now, you guys wait just a moment so I can get popcorn and watch!" Yugi ran off to the mini kitchen as Bakura snickered.
"Dude, you are in for one hell of a show!"
Jounouchi didn't like this idea at all. It was bad enough being totally ravaged by two sexy bishounen (controversial statement), but to have someone watching them in the process? That was too much. Jounouchi twisted and turned, trying to get the hell out of there, but found himself somehow making it easier for the two seducers to get into straddling-like positions. Yugi ran back with his popcorn and sat on the floor.
"Oh, let me guess!!! It's the choke hold, right?!" Ishtar shook his head.
"Considering the fact that we aren't holding onto his neck, seeing as we are a bit more attached to his... vitals... no, it is not the choke hold."
Of course, seeing as there was no hope of Jounouchi throwing them off, and getting no help from the ever oblivious Yugi, it seemed that all was lost, and he would soon have butthole with the circumference of a mason jar.
Just then, low and behold, Jounouchi's savior had come. An ever pissed Honda stomped over to the disgusting (rather nice if you're a fangirl observing) display.
"Oh, while I'm not 'around' you two go off and attack my buddy, is that how it is?! Well, I've got a nice little question for you... WHY DIDN'T YOU ATTACK ME?! WHY DOESN'T ANYBODY THROW CHOCOLATE SYRUP ON ME AND TRY TO OVERENLARGE MY BUTTHOLE?! WHAT MAKES JOUNOUCHI'S BUTTHOLE MORE STRETCH WORTHY, HUH?!!!"
Yugi giggled. "Honda, you're so silly! They're wrestling, not doing dirty stuff!" Bakura and Ishtar found new interest in the floor. Yugi then knew what was really going on. "Oh... and you were about to do... In front of ME?! You... POOPOOS!" Yugi chucked his popcorn bowl at the threesome on the couch and then rushed off to the other room, knowing that they had almost blinded him for life with their ungodliness (A/N: Blind me, baby, BLIND ME!)
Seeing as they would make no more progress for a while with Honda on one of his lectures, Ishtar and Bakura got off of Jounouchi and headed back for behind the counter for another 'strategic conference.'
As all of this stuff was going on, Ryou and Mokuba sat in the closet again, having once again finished their tongue wrestling, had found another way to spend time together. Yep, it was none other than a good old game of Candy Land!
"Yes!" Mokuba squealed in delight, "I got the Queen Frostina card!... or was it Princess... whatever. Anyway, I get to skip across most of the board to get to the ever pretty lady! Whoa yeah!"
"I'm glad you're so happy to be with some lady who isn't real when you have the sweater god sitting right here before you," Ryou said with a disappointed look on his face.
Mokuba giggled. "Don't be silly honey! None of us are real. We are just simply 2D characters, you know?"
"Oh thank you so much for reminding me."
"Don't mention it."
"Anyway, I'm no good at this game..."
"... You wanna snog?"
"Gee, for an eleven year old, you sure do have a dirty mind."
"Fine, I guess we'll just go back to the board game in which I'm kicking your ass."
"... Snog away!"
Yes, well, so far everything's going well and good, so time to go back to the slow, dramatic stuff again. Malik stood up and crossed the room, looking at the wall. Sure, he didn't want to face the facts, but he didn't want Seto to feel sad anymore either, so he felt that there was only one thing to do... find out who was stealing his Seto-kins heart and shoot the bitch. Of course, there was only one way to do that.
"Seto, I appreciate you not wanting to leave me feeling hurt and all, but I know that you're in love with someone else. I won't bother you anymore, but please, at least tell me who it is."
Kaiba was silent for a moment, knowing that he couldn't conceal the truth for much longer. Sure, it made perfect sense to tell the blonde dude what was up, and how he was thinking of somebody else (gasp), but still... what if it didn't work out and he didn't have a back up to run to, ya know? Also, it'd make things around the apartment really awkward. This made good sense and all, but then again, that little red bitch in his chest was starting to piss him off because he had access to this thing called a conscience which makes your life a living hell. So, now he was pretty much stuck with telling him the plain and honest truth.
"Keith."
"What?"
"I'm in love with... Bandit Keith."
"KEITH?!" Malik was appalled. How could his sweet and wonderful Seto love that damn shit head Bandit Keith?! Sure, maybe he was rather sexy, totally ripped, and, by all means, American (*sigh* gotta love them imported brands), which endowed him with the title of drool worthy, but the guy was so full of himself, his head wouldn't fit through cathedral doors! There's more to the world than looks, ya know!!! Okay, yeah, so he liked Kaiba cuz he's a totally hot dude, and if he were fat, he wouldn't have a chance, but that was different!
"Look, I'm sorry. I know this is all messed up, alright? Anyway, he's coming over tomorrow, so please don't get into a fight with him." Kaiba knew that Keith would beat Malik to a bloody pulp if he did.
"Why is he coming over?"
"He got kicked out of his apartment by his now ex girlfriend, so I invited him to live with us."
"WHAT???!!!!!" Now this was bad! Besides the fact that Kaiba would be on Keith like a cheap suit, there was also the problem in where they were gonna put the guy. He's huge!! The space in the apartment was limited enough as it was, and the last thing they needed was one more person to get in fights with over who got the bed/couch/pillows. As it was, whenever Ryou made an afghan, people would fight over those because they provided some type of cushioning. Oh yes, this was going to make things way worse.
Malik massaged his temples with his fingers. "Okay, Seto, where the hell are we gonna put him?"
"Well, considering Ryou and Mokuba like the closet so much, I was figuring they could live there and Malik could take up the room the both of them normally would."
"But he's not Ryou and Mokuba combined! He's more like a Honda, Jounouchi, Yugi combo!!! He's friggin big!"
"I know." Kaiba smiled pervertedly.
Malik shook his head. Oh well, at least he hadn't gone for Pegasus, or, god forbid, Honda. Now that would've been a slap in the face and a kick in the balls.
And so, now everyone would have to work to appease the new member of the two bedroom apartment household thing, not knowing what this new change in their life style could possibly entitle.
Finally! Believe it or not, I started this chapter two months ago, before I had chapter 7 up, but I haven't gotten around to finishing it until now. Crap, i have so much fanfic stuff that's behind, but I will do my best to update. Bandit Keith comes in next chapter in his asshole-ish glory, for he is sexy. I'll try to get some more randomized stuff in there and all. One thing I realized after finishing this is, shit, Malik sure did get over Kaiba quickly. I don't like people who linger on their emotions, so I try not to make the characters like that. Plus, angst=evil. Oh, and sorry to all the Honda fans out there, but I need to poke fun at somebody, and he's the best candidate. Later!