Still don't own the hanyou in red.

Chapter 6

Kagome woke up in a cold sweat, screaming. It was a nightmare, a horrid, graphic nightmare, and one that she would never forget. She sat there, panting, trying to calm herself. What she had just seen felt real, and stung like the bite of an arrow piercing her heart. She thought she could still feel the arrows lodged in her shoulders. Her hand came up instinctively to check for wounds. She found nothing, letting a wave of relief course through her body. The loss of her friends was still keen in her mind, an image not easily forgotten.

Her family came in to check up on her, only to find out it was a nightmare. After a few warm words to help her calm down, the left her after she assured them she would be all right for the rest of the night. She had just lied to get them to go back to bed, not full of the same worry and paranoia she felt, ignorant to the workings of her world. She could not bring herself to share the burden she carried; it would be too cruel to rip them from their peaceful world, and lay more to the burdens they already carried. After they had left, she got out of bed and went to the window, peering out through the glass into the moonlight night. A strange fog had covered the ground, mimicking the same fog she had in her nightmare. The view sent a chill up her spine. She didn't sense any evil force at work nearby, or anywhere in Tokyo, but there was this feeling, however small, that told her things were about to take a turn for the worst. So many things could go wrong at this point, Kagome rationalized that her fear was based solely on paranoia.

Looking at the full moon brought back memories of her times in feudal Japan. Things were finally coming to a close; she would soon be done with the life in feudal Japan. But did she want it to end? As she stared through the window, memories of times long past came flooding back, memories of Sango, Miroku, Shippo, and Inuyasha. Especially Inuyasha. They had all been through so much together, faced death so many times it was normal to have someone trying to kill you, felt so much pain at the hands of one person: Naraku. Except for Kagome. He had not hurt her directly, only injured in battle, when she got in the way. Naraku hadn't done anything particularly horrible to her, or even made to do so. No, that job fell to someone he had no part in creating: Kikyou. Kikyou was the only one who stood between her and Inuyasha. She had done so much to Kagome, Naraku almost paled in comparison. Besides occupying the spot she longed after in Inuyasha's heart, Inuyasha constantly reminded her of her inferiority to Kikyou. She knew she would never compare to her, in power, or in mind. Maybe that was how Kagome could justify Kikyou taking shards from her; by assuming she was doing something wise with it. But that never worked out, because she ended up giving it to Naraku. Kikyou was a plague on the world, sent just for Kagome it seemed at times. But then there were the times where she helped Kagome, helping her by lending some of her power, and mind. Maybe it was to repay her for the kindness Kagome had showed her earlier, one may never know. It made her wonder if there was more to the hatful clay pot that Kikyou was, but she would probably never find out. She knew one thing for certain: Kikyou was going to drag Inuyasha to hell with her. As much as she despised that thought, she knew it was not her right to decide for Inuyasha. She also knew it wasn't right he kept her stringing along, going between the two, with no consideration for her feelings. She didn't know how much she could take, so she latched on to the hope he would change.

Years in the past, at the same moment, Inuyasha was staring up at the same moon. He always had enjoyed looking up at the stars, and to some extent, the moon. He despised the moon for its absence, the same that robbed him of his strength, leaving him weak to any attack. Yet it was there for the rest of the time, and was there to offer him strength. High in his tree, the heavens were all the comfort he had ever had, until now. Now he had Kagome. It was strange, the effect she had on him. It was unlike anything he had ever felt before. He had never felt this when he was with Kikyou. He knew he was drawn to her then, because of their common suffering, and drew them close. But it never reached this. He never really trusted Kikyou, and for good reason. She had betrayed him at the first sign of attack. It had been Naraku's fault, yes, but it never should have happened. Had he not gone after the jewel, Kikyou might still be alive, Naraku dead, and things might have been different. He was the one who really deserved the blame. He had caused her death, and it was up to him to avenge her death, by destroying the one responsible, and if nessesary, appease Kikyou with his death. Maybe he would be free of this terrible guilt he carried around. He had been fortunate no one had discovered that was one of the real reasons he used his rough personality as a shield. He knew they knew that he felt responsible for her death, or at least Miroku did. But they didn't know how deep it ran. It was a burning fire, desperate for the blood of Naraku, and the appeasement of Kikyou. It was consuming him, dictating every thing he did. The search for jewel shards wasn't just that, it was a search for Naraku, and ultimately a way to quench the fire that continued to eat at him. If it didn't, the jewel would fix that. He knew if he consumed the jewel it would turn him into a mindless demon, just as Kagome had suspected, but it would at least relieve him of his pain. That was all the jewel was good for, a medicine to relieve the pain. He didn't need it to become powerful; he already had as much power as one could ask for. He needed it to destroy the source of the pain: his human side. Demons didn't feel remorse, or they wouldn't be able to go around killing senselessly. It plagued him each time he had to kill, and it was only subdued by the fact they recipients were evil demons, each destroying something. It was why he could never kill anyone, like a demon could, and why he held back. He had a conscience, and he was embarrassed by it, tormented by it, and it was his weakness. He hoped Kagome would appreciate what he was doing, letting he conscience have free reign, forgetting his guilt. He would be showing her the real him, one she had only glimpsed, and the one they often made fun of him for. He would see where his true friends lied.

It was only temporary, but the vacation would be good for him. The magic would subside if any real danger presented itself, or if things turned nasty. He let his mind relax, and became one with the tree, molding to fit its supportive curves. He felt the guilt, the pain, the memories fly away as it took effect, and peace came down on Inuyasha for the first time in many years, since the death of his father...