**~FAÇADE~**
The Edge
Disclaimer: I will own Harry Potter, I will own Harry Potter, I will own Harry Potter ::opens eyes:: nope didn't work, I still own nothing!
Hermione woke the next morning to find her room washed out by sunlight, it must have been quite late. It was a Saturday, and that meant she did not have to do anything that day. For this she was glad because there really wasn't anything she wanted to be doing, or anyone that she wanted to be with. Being with her friends reminded her too much of the old times when she was happy and carefree, but it was all different now.
Reluctantly and slowly, Hermione raised herself off her bed, and still clad in her night clothes, she made her way to the bathroom. Twenty-three minutes later, Hermione emerged from the bathroom, still in pajamas, but with wet hair streaming down her back, dampening the back of her shirt. She headed back to her room unaware that there were two gray eyes fixed on her.
Draco sat on the couch in the common room, and had been watching as Hermione walked through the hall and into her room. The dark bruises that had once covered her had now turned to a lighter shade, they were still there, but healing was taking its proper place. She had now entered her room, and was no longer visible.
There had been lots of homework, but he had finished it last night, he now sat in the common room polishing his broom. It was beautiful outside, and he did not intend to spend the day indoors. He crossed the room to look out the window.
Curses! The Gryffindor team was swarming around the Quidditich Pitch. Do they really have to practice so much? Everyone knew that Gryffindor and Slytherin were the two best teams in the school, and you didn't see Slytherin out there almost every day did you? He smirked, they must be scared for the upcoming match with Slytherin. Well, he couldn't fly around the pitch, but the grounds were always open.
He made his way out of the common room and headed towards the large front entrance of the school. However, his path was soon obstructed by a rather large object.
"Hello Drakie! I was just looking for you." As Pansy said this, she leaned up against him and ran a hand up and down his chest. Draco controlled his expressions, and did not allow the look of disgust to darken his features, however his insides churned at her touch. "What are you doing now?"
"I am going for a walk."
"Oh what fun! Where are we going?"
"I am going for a walk, alone."
"Oh, of course we're going alone, it's not romantic if we let other people come along."
Is she for real? A sigh escaped from Draco, but it was unnoticed by his dense companion. There was no way he was going to spend any more time with Pansy than he had to. "Oh no!"
"What's wrong Drakie?" Pansy asked in a disgustingly high voice.
"I've forgotten something, wait for me I'll run and get it."
"Ok, Drakie!"
He turned and left, no intention of going back. The common room was still empty, but he thought that there were faint sounds drifting from the direction of Hermione's room which meant that she was still in there. His homework was done, his broom was polished, what else was there to do? A few moments later he sat on the couch with a spell book in his hands that he got from one of the shelves that encompassed the room. Now was as good a time as ever to learn some new charms and curses.
The book was an interesting one, there was a new spell on each page and at the bottom of every page, there was a wizard that preformed the task so you could see the proper way to perform the charm.
He had gone through a few charms and performed them successfully, when he came to a page with a girl that had curly brown hair and brown eyes. She looked a bit like Hermione, but no, Hermione's hair was more wavy, and less curly, and her eyes had an amber tint that made bright even when they were full of water. The girl in the book was actually quite plain and Hermione was definitely far from plain, pretty even.
What did you just say? A sharp voice snapped through his thoughts. This voice was beginning to sound more and more like his father's.
I didn't say anything, I was merely looking at the book.
And thinking how beautiful the Mudblood was?
No, I…
Yes you were! You're pathetic! A disgrace to the name of wizards!
I do not think she's beautiful! She is nothing but a filthy muggle-born brat! And a know-it-all. She's disgusting.
I don't know what's worst, you disgusting thoughts, or your inability to read them, you dishonor me!
I…
But just then he heard the sound of a door opening, and saw Hermione walk out of her room still wearing the pajamas she had been earlier. Still in pajamas, it almost 3! Something must be wrong, well more wrong than usual.
Pa-thetic!
Shut up!
Hermione walked across the room, to a bookshelf, and stood in front of it for a moment before grabbing a book and going back to her room. She didn't even so much as glance at Draco and he couldn't help but feel slightly dismayed at this.
You told her to ignore you, and now you're upset about it?
I am not upset!
Touchy touchy,
He was not getting anywhere this way so he retreated into his room. Here he found still nothing to do, as he was a good student, he was already so far ahead in his studies, he would still be ahead at Christmas break. Wandering around the room, he could find nothing that struck his fancy. Everything was too old, too dumb, too tedious. Finally he lay down on his bed wondering if then end of the day was ever going to come soon enough when his guilty eyes came to rest on the top drawer of his bed side table.
He had already read it, it couldn't hurt to read more, and it wasn't as if anyone knew what he was up to. No one would ever find out. There was a time when he would have gladly paraded anything he read in that small book around the school in a heart beat. But now, things were different, he had lost all desire to even tease her about things he had for the past six years. And yet, nothing had truly changed between them, to Hermione, he knew that he was the same self centered git that he had always been. She saw him no differently than she always had; he was her enemy, the boy who made her cry. Then why now, could he not bring himself to be that boy? If he was a git, why did he feel so sorry now, for all the times he taunted her, seeing just how far he could push her before he could make her cry. Why now, when he could be doing anything, was the only thing that interested him a small diary that belonged to the girl who hated him? How come he could not remove her from his thoughts? What was happening?
Eventually Draco gave into his desire and pulled out the book and read more. He read many of the entries and found in them so much pain so much sorrow. There were things in there though, that he could feel too; how often had he felt alone, entirely alone? Too often. He wondered if there could ever be a time when he might not have to be so alone.
He found entries that told of her hatred for him; he knew it was so, but somehow, reading it was difficult. Here he had access to her every thought and feeling, and saw himself from other eyes, and to say he didn't like it would be an understatement. In her latest entries, he had entirely disappeared, everyone had disappeared. Hermione felt alone, like she had no one; and Draco began to worry for her. He did not stop reading until he had finished all that there was to read. The last entry had been peculiar and curiously short.
Dear Diary,
Is there not anything to fill this emptiness inside me?
And that was it except for a few tear splotches that obscured the page. It was dark outside now, and his stomach yelled at him for the neglect it had been receiving. He was hungry, but there was no way he could eat anything. The book was placed on top of his night stand, as Draco needed to go to the bathroom and get ready for bed.
He crept down the dark hallway, because he figured Hermione would be sleeping already, but the door to her room was slightly ajar, and he could not help himself. The room was entirely dark, except for a patch of moonlight that illuminated the sleeping girl in her bed. Draco noticed that the pajamas were the same ones that she had been wearing all day.
Lying in her bed, Hermione looked so small and innocent, and Draco hated himself for ever horrible comment he ever said to her. He stood there watching her for a moment, when she began to toss and turn. She was muttering words aloud, but only just so; and Draco couldn't hear what exactly they were, but he thought he saw a "No" and some "stop"s.
An idea came to Draco, and he sat down on the edge of the brunette's bed pulling out his wand. Placing his wand at her temple he breathed the words, "Nocturna Pleasentus." A slow smile crept over Hermione's face, and she snuggled down into her pillow. Absentmindedly, Draco petted her hair for a few minutes as she slept, looking down at her now placid features.
When Draco finally reached the bathroom, he stared at himself in the mirror, what have you done?
Hermione awoke in the morning actually feeling quite pleasant. It was a feeling that was now strange to her, but not unwelcome. When she woke up, she actually woke up and got dressed, and looked forward to any challenges the day might hold. Today, she felt alive, even if it was a rare and beautiful thing. Her good mood darkened slightly as she passed through her common room, where she was greeted with a glare from Malfoy; but reminding herself that this was much better than a ten minuet long row her spirits picked up a little.
At breakfast, she found only Ron and she sat down by him as he piled his plate high with pancakes. "Morning Mione!"
"Morning Ron!" she said giving her best friend a hug and a small peck on the cheek.
"Well, something surely made you cheerful this morning!"
"I've just had the best sleep that I've had in ages, and I feel good. Where are Harry and Ginny?"
"Oh, they said something about needing to talk alone."
The two teens finished their breakfast and then decided to find their friends. They didn't have to look very hard; Harry was in the common room sitting in an arm chair, with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands.
"Harry what's wrong?"
"She dumped me, she dumped me!" his voice was soft as if he couldn't get over the shock of it.
"What?!?!" Ron was livid! He had been counting on wedding bells with this pair. Ginny was going to need a stern talking to! A red color began to span his face.
Hermione decided to be more sensitive, "I know, it must be really hard for you Harry. How you must feel alone after things had been going so well, but…"
But Harry cut her off, picking his head up out of his hands to expose two red rimmed green eyes, he shouted, "Oh what do you know of it Hermione? Every thing's always perfect for you! Perfect grades, perfect family, perfect life! What do you know about pain and sorrow? NOTHING! You've always had everything you ever wanted, including foreign Quidditch stars who wrap themselves around your finger. Don't lecture me on how I feel when nothing horrible has ever happened to you in your life!"
It was Hermione's turn to yell, "You're right Harry, I know NOTHING about it! Nothing!" And she turned and stormed out of the Gryffindor common room, but stopped at the portrait and turned to have a last word, "and I am sorry for trying to comfort you, Harry. I suppose I just forgot, that no one except you has every felt alone, and no one else ever goes through any tough times. You the special one, the only one who has problems. Arrogant bastard!" she stormed out of the common room, and broke into a run.
Imagine her never going through anything bad in her life! Imagine, her no knowing what it was like to be alone! If only they knew! They were the ones who didn't know what it felt like! They didn't understand true pain. Well she didn't need them, she didn't need this! She didn't stop running until she reached her bed room. She went to her trunk and took out her diary, a quill, an ink well, and a small phial and then sat down at the foot of her bed. A million things were going through her head all at once, and she had no desire to make sense of them all, she only wanted them to be silent; to stop and leave her alone.
Draco had been in the common room when Hermione burst through it, he would never get any work done if she kept interrupting him like this. He made for his room, and when he got there, he saw that the diary that he had left on the nightstand was beginning to glow. The words appeared on the page as Hermione sat writing them in her room.
Dear Diary,
I am sick of pretending. I can't keep this up any longer! My life is perfect? My life? If they even knew the half of it! I am no longer the same happy girl that I once was. There is nothing left for me here except for pain, no one here who could ever understand the emptiness I feel. Nothing but anguish, and this agony must end. Now. I just want every thing to stop, and there's only one way to do that
The quill fell out of Hermione's shaking hand, and the then she lifted the phial slowly to her lips.
*~*~*~*~*~*
BUM BUM BUM, what will happen?
Well, I'm not so sure a/b this chapter, didn't live up to my standards, but I suppose its alright, next chapter, things will pick up a lot! The next chapter gets evil! But I suppose I should leave that to next chapter shouldn't I?
I'm sad, b/c I updated one of my stories, Initiation, (which is now finished!), but its on page 19 of the updates!! N I updated this morning, and that didn't show up! I think I will go back to that one and write more, though, I think that one will have a sequel , I skipped over five action filled years, but it the sequel wont be a romance, but an action, which is why it's a sequel and not continuing, hmm… I like that. Ok! I'm a little better now!
And to my reviewers! I love you guys! Sry bout the lame chapter next one will be better for you I promise!
Roxy Surfer: again, thank you for your review! I am so happy you like my stories, and it means a lot to me that you always review them! It makes me feel like a good writer! ::smiles::
Scalene Tristy: thanks for the review! I know poor Hermione, but it will unfortunately prolly get worst before it gets better, I have big plans for her ::grins evilly::
Dreaming One: Thanks for the review, yea, I know the plots old, but I like it. ^_^ yea I'll watch my characters. I suppose ur right about Hermione though, although I was kinda going for the learned helplessness deal that often those who are beaten develop, but I think I am going to maker her stand up and try to control things soon, and ill show shes still intelligent in the next ch too, oh I can see this getting long, but u've given me an idea. Hmm… good job.
Draco-Malfoy-Severus-Lover: yay! Thank you! I'm flattered! And I read the new ch, it was great!
Blade Mackay: thank you! Glad you liked it!
Pandora: Thank you for the review! Happy to see you liked it! I think its going to get sad I did make it angst, but I promise it will become cheerful at one point and thing will get resolved, because well, I want romance in there too, hmm… there might even be action, because well, I am tired of writing short stories! n I heart this fic!! O, n its definitely not too sunny here in Florida, despite all the rumors, it actually raind (pours) just about every day and its hot as hades even when its cloudy! Bleh! Entirely unliveable, I like about 50 mins away from Maimi, and it is nothing like they pretend it is down here! I was actually telling a friend of mine the other day how it would be nice to live in England!
Einahpets1: thanks for the review! Also thank you because you have read many of my stories, and review a lot! I appreciate that! Hope u enjoy!
Lady Matsu: thank you! A lot! I am glad to hear that it came across that way! Emotions are tricky things! I think that next chapter, we will get more emotions, and well, different emotions coming through. Hmm…::tapps fingers:: yes that will do nicely!
Georgie: thank you! I think I may have made Malfoy a lil mushy here, but it was mostly his thoughts, next chapter we are going to get actions, and I promise he wont come off as too soft, well he has to crack a little, but not too much he is quite stubborn you know!
Purrtyflirty: Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it!
Kewii: thank you! That means a lot to me, I know this ch kinda sucked, but ive got big plans for the next one!
Sweetstar3: thanks, ok I will! ^_^
Dragonbrat: thanks for the review! Ahh! You are so right about Ginny! I know what too do now, I will have her pick it up in the next chapter, Hermione's day of absence will confirm her thoughts, and she will have espically wanted to talk to her about harry, and be upset that she wasn't newhere to be found n oh, I shouldn't give away the whole plot, but yay! I have even more plans now! Thank you!
Fiery-chan: thank you! I like his conflicts too, but I think they got excessive in this ch, can u tell I didn't like this one much, but hold on b/c I have great ideas for whats coming up!
Rouge-Mage: thanks for the review! and thank you, emotions are hard to pinpoint often, its nice to hear when you've nailed them!
Okay folks! That was all the reviewers for chapter four! I am so glad that it was well liked! It makes me happy, and in replying to my rewiewers, I have gotten oober amount of plans for this fic! Give me all the suggestions you want! I am after all writing this to please you guys. I feel great things about to happen! Terrible, but great! (tee hee recognize this?)
Well, I got places to go, characters to manipulate, stories to write, I will try and get out the next chapter in a few days! Maybe sooner even. Its actually not written yet! curse having to get my laptop updated! Well I must get down to business! See you soon!
REVIEW!!
~Atiannala