She's gone. Gone, forever. I'm still in shock. And she loved me, and I loved her, and nobody can ever take that away from me. And Lizzie can't believe it, and I can't believe it, and Ethan is mad and jealous. And Lizzie sobs with me, and I know she's sad, even though Kate and her hated each other.
I wish somebody had come in, before she took those pills and wrote that letter and picked up that gun… If only, if only I had called her and told her that she was beautiful. If only she had told Ethan she has pregnant, if only she had cheerleading that night, if only her dad had taken his gun to the bar with him instead of leaving it in the closet. If only she didn't go to that camp, if only Lizzie, Miranda and I had stayed friends with her.
There are too many 'if only' s. I just wish that nobody died, ever. I just wish that she wasn't so lonely. If I knew that she loved me, oh, what I would do, because I love her too.
If only.