Chapter 4
Forever
Kylia stood looking out the window to the courtyard. Although the desert landscape was beautiful, its beauty seemed empty to her. Perhaps, she thought, it was she herself that was empty. Ever since her arrival here three weeks earlier, nothing seemed real to her. She felt as though she had left a large piece of herself behind somewhere, and nothing she could find was able to fill the vast emptiness it left in her.
It was foolish to feel this way, she knew. She had accomplished what she had set out to do. Raven's friend Vulcan was safe. She could see him walking in the courtyard below. He moved slowly, still awkward with the crutches that supported him. She moved away from the window. It hurt her to see him struggling so, even though she had been assured that he would recover fully from his injuries.
When the LMC had fallen some six or so months ago, Kylia had been appalled at the way Vulcan had been treated. Being a young woman, she was horrified by the actions of Pioneer. They took her in, Kylia Cross, but left Vulcan to his own devices because he wanted revenge on the people who had destroyed his family and friends. Vulcan was not the total pacifist that his father was and wanted him to be. Kylia thought that this was a good thing. This was not a perfect world. Eventually every total pacifist was destined to suffer the same fate. Obviously Pioneer did not agree.
Kylia had wished that she could take in Vulcan herself after the event, but knew that this was impossible. A mere med-tech Raven and her businessman husband, recently married soon after LMC's demise, were hardly suitable guardians for a Raven trying to heal.
The one thing that Kylia knew she could do for him was to protect him and assure that he had his revenge. When Kylia spoke of this to her husband, he had laughed at her, calling her foolish. As a joke, he had paid for her to have fencing lessons, telling her that noblemen and chivalrous warriors quite often fought with swords and melee weapons.
Kylia ignored the jest and accepted the lessons. In only a few months she could find no one with the ability to best her. Her instructors tried to persuade her to enter professional competition, but Kylia had declined, saying that her career as a Raven was too important for her to leave.
Kylia eventually learned of the fate of the older LMC ravens through connections with her husband's company, Darcon Industries, a faction of Pioneer. they had been taken in by a military man by the name of Dastun. A widower with no plans for remarriage, he wanted them to be a benefactor for his army in the Layered city known as Paradigm.
When Kylia was shown a photo of him and his friend Roger Smith, she was amazed at the appearance of the young 'negotiator'. Although he was only twenty-four years old at the time, he looked more like a kind person than a killer. He was dressed in the uniform of the military academy which he attended. His dark blue eyes were icy and serious. One of his hands rested on the shoulder of his young caretaker, Dorothy. The bond between the two was undeniable. It was also obvious that Roger was fiercely protective of the younger girl.
She would have her revenge and Roger would help her every step of the way, of that Kylia was certain, since he was a raven and corporate negotiator. She was not certain, however, what role she would be playing in all of this. She was determined that she would have one.
Darcon Industries eventually led her to her destiny. An independent development company of weapons, they thought that a raven would make an excellent test pilot for their new AC designs. Kylia's husband recommended her for the position, thus she learned to pilot all of the newest and most powerful ACs developed by Darcon. Her medical knowledge was invaluable to them in providing information on the effects of different cockpit systems on a pilot. She was also useful in determining the effects of various weapon systems on a human enemy.
She soon became an extremely accomplished AC pilot. If they had known of her abilities, many armies and rebel groups would have begged her to join them. A moot point, since Kylia had her own agenda. She would use all of her abilities to help and protect Vulcan, but she would join no army. Darcon had provided her with everything she needed to act on her own.
"Do you really think that he needs your help or protection?" Rico had once asked her. When she did not respond, he continued, "Even if he did, he would never accept it from you. he's nothing but a poor little soldier with no army. This war and all of its battles are nothing but a game to him. Not that I mind. He's providing use with quite a large source of income, don't you think?"
Kylia looked with dismay upon the man whom she had once thought that she loved. Somewhere as the months had passed that love had died. She realized that the only love that Rico Dalton had was for money. As a salesman for a weapons company, this war between Crest and Mirage was quite the financial boon for him. It took a lot of nerve for him to say that the war was just a game for the rich, since to him it was nothing more than a business opportunity. Did he think that his position in this made him any better than Vulcan? She supposed that he did.
A few weeks after their discussion about 'poor little soldiers', Kylia discovered the truth about her husband's business dealings. He was selling to all sides. She was appalled by this and confronted him about it. His response to her accusations made her blood run cold. "If I only sold to one side, eventually that side would become more powerful and defeat the others. I have to keep things even. There's too much profit in this to let it end."
Too stunned to respond, Kylia had walked away. She was so disgusted that she never wanted to see Rico again. It was time for her to do something, she knew. The next day while he was out making his dirty she began to sift through his business records. This all took place three weeks prior.
The records that Kylia sought were not difficult to find. In a matter of minutes she was looking at a list of names of people to whom Rico had sold either weapons or military technology. Following each name was contact information and the dollar amount of each of the transactions which that person had made with Darcon. As Kylia scanned the list, she discovered that many top officers in the Alliance Military had made extremely large purchases from Darcon. This did not surprise her. It was the names and purchase amounts that followed that shocked Kylia. Rico was quite literally giving weapons and technology to forces both on earth and in the Layered cities! She knew that he did this not because he supported their causes, but rather to keep the battles going and the money flowing into his bank account. At the end of the list was the information which Kylia had sought. She quickly scribbled the contact information for the Military Police Negotiator, Roger Smith, on a scrap of paper and stashed it in her wallet. With a few swift keystrokes Kylia was able to hide forever the fact that she had accessed this information.
Satisfied that she had sufficiently covered her tracks, Kylia checked her own schedule for the day. She saw that she was scheduled to run two separate test flights using a new prototype cockpit system called ZG. The system had great potential, but it still frightened her. She did not like the direction that Darcon was taking in its development. Its purpose was to keep the pilot focused, not a bad thing in itself. It was the fact that the focus was placed on an enemy rather than an objective that disturbed her. It could turn a pilot into a virtual search and destroy machine. What was worse was that its effects did not wear off after the pilot left the suit, at least not totally. When she had voiced her concerns about this to the Darcon development teams, they told her that they did not view this as a problem so long as the pilot was not physically harmed by the system. It did not matter to them that even after leaving a suit, the pilot still felt an intense need to destroy the enemy. They might have felt differently if only they knew who it was that Kylia considered to be her enemy. She had been exposed to the effects of ZG many times and often had difficulty controlling its effects on her in her daily life. She wondered how much effect her exposure to ZG had on her plans for today.
After she had completed the first test flight, still strongly influenced by ZG, Kylia took the action which set the current chain of events in motion.
She sought an area were she would have privacy and brought out her portable communication system. She took the scrap of paper from her wallet and quickly keyed in the contact information for Roger Smith, adding a code which would scramble her image on his end of the com-link. When his image appeared on her vid-screen, Kylia trembled ever so slightly. He was young, handsome, powerful and determined, even more than she had expected. She would have to keep her personal feelings in check if she wanted to accomplish her goals. The sound of his voice returned her to her senses.
"Who is this?" he asked, seemingly without malice or suspicion. "Your vid image is unclear and I am afraid that I can't recognize you."
"I scrambled my image to protect both of us," Kylia replied. "You would not recognize me even if you could see me, as we have never met. I am a test pilot for Darcon Industries in LC 086 and I have information about my employer which I believe it is vital that you know." When she saw him nod, Kylia began to tell of all the double dealing that involved himself and Darcon. She gave him names, dates, and monetary amounts. She also told him of the cockpit system which she was currently testing and launched a tirade about its dangers if anyone were to get it into his head to use it on a large scale basis. Her message to him completed, she awaited his response.
"You have confirmed what I have suspected for quite a while," he told her. "You do realize that giving me this information has put not only your job, but also your life in jeopardy. Do you wish for Military protection?"
Kylia's response was swift. "I am a woman of many talents, Major Smith. Losing this job holds little significance to me. It would not be difficult for me to obtain another. As for my life, you know that I am an AC pilot, I am perfectly capable of protecting myself. I have been told that I am one of the best. I do not know if that is true, but I feel very little fear for my life."
"I did not wish to offend you by my asking, but I would not want to see someone who has provided me with such information come to any harm," he explained. "I will take your word that you are capable of defending yourself. You must, however, tell me where you are."
Kylia understood his request. "I am at Darcon's main headquarters on the test flight field. I just completed several test flights using the ZG system. I am scheduled to run several similar test flights on Kennedy Flight Field in about two hours."
"Get the Hell out of there," Roger told her, "And don't show up for those additional test flights. Darcon is going to have some serious problems in about three hours. Do you understand?"
"Perfectly," Kylia responded and broke the comlink. There was nothing to be gained from any additional contact. It could only put them at risk of being discovered. That was a risk that she was not willing to take.
She loaded her two test suits, a flight MT and an AC, onto the carrier which Darcon had provided her for convenience. To all who saw her she appeared to be preparing to travel to Kennedy for the second round of test flights. Only she knew that instead she would be flying to a deserted airfield about three hundred miles away. She would spend the night there on the carrier. In the morning she would make her way to a nearby town to learn of the events which transpired during her flight. She knew that she would never return to her former life again, but she had no regrets. Her heart told her that she was doing the right thing.
When she got to town the next day the first thing she did was find a newspaper. The headlines were exactly what she expected. Darcon's treachery was exposed and Rico Dalton was dead. When the tears finally came to her eyes they were not for her late husband. Rather, she cried because she knew that she must now leave her friend Vulcan. He was sure to realize that she had played a part in the attack on Darcon. She did not want him to feel that he had to live with the person who had arranged her husband's death.
Pioneer would care for him, she was sure. Later, she would see an attorney to set up a trust fund for him. For now, though, all she sought was absolution for her sins, for she supposed that what she had done was a sin.
She sought a priest in a small church in the town and asked him to hear her confession. The tears flowed freely down her cheeks as she told him of what she had done. She cried not out of regret, but because she knew that her life would never be the same and she had no idea where she would go from here.
Amazingly the old priest gave her the answers she sought in his response to her confession. A truly wise man, he had told her, "My child, you have committed no sin. This is a time of war. It is sad that you and the man you once loved chose such conflicting positions, but these things happen. The true sin would have been if you had done nothing and let him continue doing his treacherous deeds. I know of a place where you can go for help and guidance in your plans for the future. It is called the Guardian Temple. In it you will find people of many different faiths whose desire is only to work together to protect all those on earth and the colonies who are in danger due to this ongoing war. It is a few miles outside the LC city limits. Go there, my child, and may God go with you!"
Feeling that she had nothing to lose, Kylia decided to go to the Guardian Temple. Her carrier would have her there within a few hours. She was not sure if these people would be able to help her, but she knew that going there was the only way to know.
When Kylia arrived at the Guardian Temple, she was truly surprised by the diversity of the members of the community. It's members included not only religious people of nearly every faith, but also members of the scientific and medical professions. The presence of these many different people gave credence to the old priest's words. Kylia decided to seek out the head of the community and ask for help. The worst that could happen was that her request would be refused, leaving her in the same position in which she was now.
She was not refused, though, and the members of the Guardian community had helped her in many ways over the last few years The scientists had helped to develop ZG into a safer system by letting it place more emphasis on the preservation of the pilot's life, something which Kylia considered to be vitally important. They also helped her to convert a ruined AC into the most powerful suit that anyone could possess. Its computer, armor, and defensive systems could not be matched by any other AC in existence. She had named this suit the Angel Z because it was her intention to use it to act as a sort of guardian angel to the man who was calling himself Raven Cross, whom she hadn't seen since the fall of the LMC. However, she heard that he died during the mission that sent him to destroy Kisaragi's secret weapon Lucifer Dragon.
Kylia was so deeply entrenched in her memories of the past that she did not notice her friend and mentor, Morning Star, enter her room until the woman placed her hand on hers. The young native American woman was a shaman for her people and wise far beyond her years. She had been more of an emotional and spiritual guide to Kylia over the past few months than any member of Kylia's own faith. Beyond that the two women had also developed a very close bond of friendship.
Morning Star spoke softly to Kylia. "Vulcan wishes to see the one who saved him. What shall I tell him?"
Kylia's response was terse. "Tell him that he was saved by an angel whose wings and heart have been broken. Angels require no thanks, and this one seeks to go far away to nurse her wounds. He has been given a second chance at being a raven. Tell him to use it wisely."
"I will tell him what you have said," the younger woman replied. "It is clear that you are still deeply in mourning over the supposed death of Raven. You obviously had very deep feelings for him. Please remember this... his grave lies empty... his body was never recovered, and I do not feel the absence of his life force in this realm."
Morning Star's words both shocked and wounded Kylia. Her response to them was almost instinctive. Her hand flew up to slap the other woman and her words were harsh and bitter. "How dare you presume to know what I feel! You must know that any woman capable of arranging her own husband's death is incapable of loving anyone. Dalton stripped that ability away from me long ago. Despite what some people may say, I know that Raven was a good man. He certainly did not deserve the death that he was dealt... and I heard him die when I secretly accompanied him on that mission. For all of the capabilities that I had, I wasn't able to do a damn thing to save him! All that I could do was watch him die. Do you understand?! I saw his death. Heard his final words. No one could survive what happened to the Dalriadan. I... watched... while... he ... died. I knew how he felt when he first killed..."
Kylia's voice faded into a quiet sobbing as she spoke the final words. Morning Star, unaffected by Kylia's previous actions, reached out to her friend and held her while she wept. Kylia did not resist.
It seemed an eternity to Kylia before she was able to compose herself enough to speak. She knew that she owed the other woman an apology. "I am truly sorry. I never should have slapped you. It's just that I've seen my whole world...my whole life ...fall to pieces these past few weeks. It seems that I no longer know my own heart. I've been a raven in this war for so long, in one way or another. I have no idea where to go from here now that it's over. I'm just so..."
"Frightened," Morning star finished for her. "That is quite understandable, but I don't believe that there has been a true ending to war. The human heart will never change that much. I'm not even sure that it should. This particular war may be soon to end, but there will certainly be others. At that time we will all have need of soldiers who were not foolish enough to permanently put down their weapons. Until that time, I do know of a place where you might go to give yourself time to heal."
"And where shall I go? What shall I do? What kind of place can offer solace to a wounded soldier such as myself?" Kylia asked. "My body may be whole but my heart is broken. I feel so empty inside. I've been told that time will heal me, but I don't believe there could be enough time to take this emptiness away."
"The new LMC has formed a new raven policy. It is a sort of intelligence agency whose purpose is to curtail future conflicts on other Layered cities," Morrning Star explained. "This organization is in need of a person to head the medical operations on that new terra-forming project. They also have need of an experienced pilot to run carrier missions between the project and earth. You are qualified to fill both positions. You even have your own carrier craft. With our recommendations the organization would surely take you on. You will be quite busy and also quite far from all reminders of the past."
Kylia walked to the window and once again looked out on Vulcan. At least she had been successful in saving that man. She supposed that she had no other choice. She had to get on with her life, painful as it may be. "Then recommend me to them. Perhaps being far from here is what I need to be able to go on," she told her friend.
Morning Star smiled. "I thought that would be the way that you would feel. You have already been recommended. They were quite pleased to be able to fill two positions with one person. Your salary will be quite generous. You have a meeting with one of the leaders of LMC in three days time."
"Then I suppose I should begin packing," Kylia said. "I'm quite certain that their headquarters are nowhere near here."
"You are correct. Their main office is housed in the building that formerly was occupied by Corporate Sector Authority. You will have to return to Europe once more before you take your leave," Morning Star explained.
"Raven's grave is in a cemetery just outside the city. Perhaps if you go there you may find some closure."
Kylia ignored what was being implied by the reference to Raven's empty grave. "I shall go there," she said and turned away to begin packing her things.
The trip to LC 086 had not been an easy one for Kylia. Her heart had called her to land her carrier far away, near the old Arena Base. There were many memories there that she needed to revisit.
She traveled the rest of the way to 086 on a small motor bike, hoping that the wind blowing in her face would clear her tortured mind of her memories, and the new and painful discoveries she had made during the short time she was in the ruined Arena.
As Kylia had stood outside the old base, she was amazed at how well the battle scarred grounds had already healed. Hardly any trace remained of the bitter and bloody battles fought there. Only in her own mind could she see the onslaught of the battles with those ghastly unmanned ACs and the fall of many of her friends in the so-called "Libra Militant Corporation" at the hands of that horrid Kisaragi beast, the Dragon MT. Because of her superior skills, Kylia and her AC had been able to survive and defeat many of the enemy ACs. It was not until Kisaragi had emerged in the dragon that she herself had her first taste of defeat. She knew instinctively that the suit was of Kisaragi design, and shuddered ever so slightly as she realized that Roger had not heeded the advice she had given him on that not-so-long ago day. She could tell by the way that the dragon fought later in the war that Roger or someone close to him had preserved the data on the ZG system and had installed his own version of it in the cockpit of this fearsome MT! She could also tell by the MT attack on members of both sides that it considered all who were fighting there to be his enemies.
As the labeled "Lucifer Dragon" had approached her AC, she knew that it would be destroyed. She could still feel the wind blowing through her hair as she barely managed to exit the cockpit and leap free of the suit a fraction of a second before it was destroyed. She could do naught but stand by and watch when she forced her battered and bruised body up from its prone position. The ground was shaking from the intensity of the attack, and her beloved AC was engulfed in the flames of its destruction. A single tear made its way down her cheek. Most certainly a part of herself had died upon the destruction of her first AC. All that she could do at that point was to seek a place of safety until the battle reached its conclusion.
On her way to the place of safety that she sought, Kylia had stumbled over the body of a fallen news photographer. His camera was still clutched in his lifeless hands. As Kylia stopped to close his sightless eyes and say a brief prayer, she couldn't help but wonder if the last photograph he had taken was worth the price he had paid to get it, his life. Unable to linger any longer she left the dead man's side to seek refuge in the cockpit of a fallen unmanned heavyweight AC.
As she entered the suit, she realized that none of its physical structure had been severely damaged. In the cockpit she realized that the reason this suit was no longer functioning was merely because of damage to the computerized command system. With a few adjustments to the controls, she would once again join the battle using this suit in its original form as an ordinary AC. She was not worried about the specs being set for a non-human computerized pilot. She could force herself to meet them. In her years as a test pilot, she had forced herself to do much the same many times over.
She wiped the thoughts from her head as she was driving down the last stretch of dirt roads, all that she should be focusing on is her path ahead.