Chapter 3: Upstream
Our team of intrepid (cough) adventurers had arrived at the next level called Upstream.
"There he goes again," said Crash, "with that coughing thing"
"So," said Spyro, "What is this level like?" Spyro looked around. They were standing on a log surrounded by water, with an Aku Aku mask at the end. Crash collected it.
"This level is not that hard," said Crash, "We have to walk along the path of giant lily pads until we get to another log or a pillar in the water"
A fish jumped up and bit Spyro's butt.
"Ouch!" he said, "That was just getting better"
"Oh yeah," said Coco, "watch out for the stupid fish"
A fish jumped up and bit Coco
"Oww, they're really moody" she said
"Let's just go shall we," said Crash, "Or we'll be here forever"
"So" said Spyro
"Well we have to catch the bad guys don't we?" Crash said
"Oh, yeah, sure" they all said, with not much enthusiasm
"Wow," remarked Crash, pointing to the previous line, "That's a big word"
Author: Well, thanks, I spelled it myself
"I didn't mean it was good," Crash explained, "I just said it was big. Anyone can spell it though"
Author: Whatever. Get on with your adventure.
Crash hopped onto the first lily pad, and to the second.
"Follow me guys," he said
"Uh Crash, shouldn't you move?" asked Coco
SPLASH!
"Too late"
Crash crawled out again, "I forgot they sank after a while" he said, and he span to get himself dry. "Good as new" he said
SPLASH!
"He forgot to move again" said Spyro
Crash got up and quickly span dry, and started to run along. Everone followed.
"There is a waterfall we have to walk up soon" said Crunch
"Yeah right," said Sonic, "There'll just happen to be a waterfall up ahead with a slippery path in the middle to climb up it"
And sure enough, up ahead was a waterfall, with a slippery path to climb up it.
"Wow," exclaimed Sonic, "that just took away my pride"
"You know pride is a sin" said Crash, his mouth full of Wumpa fruit
"So is gluttony," laughed Spyro, just before they all realised they were still on the lily pads.
SPLASH!
After they all climbed out onto the slippery path, Crash ran up the path, slipped over, and knocked everyone back into the water.
"If we keep falling in any longer," said Aku Aku, "ten years will have past and I'll be really old"
"You're already old" said Crash as he ran up the path and slipped back down again. This time everybody dodged except Aku Aku who got hit in with Crash.
Soon everybody had stopped falling in the water and had finally got somewhere (Hallelujah) and were progressing along the lily pad path without falling in at all (Well done!).
Soon Crash + co. came to a fallen pillar in the water.
"Stupid author," he said, "Just because he is to lazy to actually go on this adventure, and all he has to do is write"
Author: Listen, you. If I weren't writing you wouldn't even be on this adventure, all you'd be doing is sitting at home drinking your wumpa fruit juice, sitting outside your hut and doing nothing.
"I fail to see what is so bad about that." said Crash. Everyone agreed.
Author: Shut up. The almighty CheatMasta ownz you!
"Actually, Naughty Dog ownz us!" Crash said Matter-of-factly
"So your name is CheatMaster?" asked Coco
CheatMasta(Author):No, my name is CheatMasta, with an A at the end.
"Same thing" said Coco
CheatMasta: No it isn't, now hurry up and do what your'e supposed to do!
"Oh yeah," said Crash, "what if we don't wanna continue on this quest?"
CheatMasta (Me) sets Crash's hair on fire. Crash screams and dips his head into the water.
"Well I still ain't going" said Aku Aku stubbornly
"Me neither" said Crunch
"Copy cat" Aku Aku said
"Stupid piece of firewood" said Crunch
"Bring it on!" threatened Aku Aku
"I will" said Crunch
CheatMasta: Oh just shut up will you!
CheatMasta creates a portal and sucks down Crunch and Aku Aku.
"If you hate us too," queried Crash, "why didn't you just suck us down?"
CheatMasta: Because my story would suck without any characters
"Dude, your story sucks anyway" said Crash
CheatMasta: If you weren't my main character!!
"Where'd they go?" asked Coco
CheatMasta: To HELL!
In Hell ---------------------------
We see Crunch and Aku Aku surrounded by beautiful she-bandicoots and err.. she-masks
In even worse hell. I mean in the adventure ----------
CheatMasta: Thank god they're gone anyway, I got sick of typing Aku Aku, and Crunch didn't do anything, he just tagged along
"Well, let's go" said Crash, "We've been on this pillar for ages now"
So our new, smaller, band of merry men... I mean band of heroes (cough) set on their way towards the next waterfall and after that, to the warp pad.
"There he goes," said Crash, "coughing again"
CheatMasta: I have asthma!
"Oh, sorry"
Our new gang got to the part with the moving lily pad.
"What do we do here" asked Spyro
"We jump on the moving lily pad, then on the next one until we come to a rock," explained Crash, "quickly before we sink!"
SPLASH!
Too late!
Spyro + friends swam back to the surface and grabbed the moving lily pad. They climbed up on the lily pad and jumped over to the next pad, and then to the rock. Crash broke a box and collected the life. The life floated to the stats.
"I thought I flamed those stats" said Spyro, flaming them again. Thy melted away.
"Let's go up the second waterfall" said Crash
So they did.
Spyro and Sonic saw the jumping fish at the top of the waterfall.
"How do we get past the stupid fish?" asked Sonic
Sonic was pinched by a fish. "Ouch!"
Crash explained, "I have to jump in the air and spin at the same time to knock it out"
"I have a better idea" said Spyro
He flamed the fish, it burnt up and crumbled to dust.
"How come you never thought of that earlier" asked Crash, "like when I was knocked down that pit by that stupid plant!"
A fish bit him.
"I said plant!"
The fish bit him again. Spyro flamed it.
"Aaah" Sonic, "flamed fish" He started drooling.
"Well" continued Crash
"Well what?" asked Spyro, confused
Crash sighed, "Look at my question seven lines ago"
"Oh," said Spyro, "Dunno, sometimes I can't think of things until afterwards, and about the plant thing, I wanted to see you fall down the pit"
"Thanks," said Crash, "I love you too!"
"You do?," said Spyro,"thanks" Spyro reached out for a hug. Crash pushed him away.
"It was a figure of speech" he said
Just then, Sonic choked on his own drool.
"Let's get to the warp pad now" said Crash
So they did.
Sonic + aquaintances reached the end warp pad.
"I can't wait!" said Coco
"What for?" asked Sonic
"Next time it will be 'Coco + pals' or something like that"
Sonic shrugged and leapt into the portal after Crash and Spyro. Coco was about to jump in when...
CheatMasta: Coco, don't get your hopes up. Next time it will be 'Crash + (whatever)'.
"Why don't I get to be affiliated with anybody?" asked Coco
CheatMasta: Because your'e still crap!
"Hey" shouted Coco
CheatMasta shoots a bolt of lightning at Coco, sending her flying into the portal.
------------------------------------ Next: Papu Papu
Now end
Right now
STOP! R+R please
Our team of intrepid (cough) adventurers had arrived at the next level called Upstream.
"There he goes again," said Crash, "with that coughing thing"
"So," said Spyro, "What is this level like?" Spyro looked around. They were standing on a log surrounded by water, with an Aku Aku mask at the end. Crash collected it.
"This level is not that hard," said Crash, "We have to walk along the path of giant lily pads until we get to another log or a pillar in the water"
A fish jumped up and bit Spyro's butt.
"Ouch!" he said, "That was just getting better"
"Oh yeah," said Coco, "watch out for the stupid fish"
A fish jumped up and bit Coco
"Oww, they're really moody" she said
"Let's just go shall we," said Crash, "Or we'll be here forever"
"So" said Spyro
"Well we have to catch the bad guys don't we?" Crash said
"Oh, yeah, sure" they all said, with not much enthusiasm
"Wow," remarked Crash, pointing to the previous line, "That's a big word"
Author: Well, thanks, I spelled it myself
"I didn't mean it was good," Crash explained, "I just said it was big. Anyone can spell it though"
Author: Whatever. Get on with your adventure.
Crash hopped onto the first lily pad, and to the second.
"Follow me guys," he said
"Uh Crash, shouldn't you move?" asked Coco
SPLASH!
"Too late"
Crash crawled out again, "I forgot they sank after a while" he said, and he span to get himself dry. "Good as new" he said
SPLASH!
"He forgot to move again" said Spyro
Crash got up and quickly span dry, and started to run along. Everone followed.
"There is a waterfall we have to walk up soon" said Crunch
"Yeah right," said Sonic, "There'll just happen to be a waterfall up ahead with a slippery path in the middle to climb up it"
And sure enough, up ahead was a waterfall, with a slippery path to climb up it.
"Wow," exclaimed Sonic, "that just took away my pride"
"You know pride is a sin" said Crash, his mouth full of Wumpa fruit
"So is gluttony," laughed Spyro, just before they all realised they were still on the lily pads.
SPLASH!
After they all climbed out onto the slippery path, Crash ran up the path, slipped over, and knocked everyone back into the water.
"If we keep falling in any longer," said Aku Aku, "ten years will have past and I'll be really old"
"You're already old" said Crash as he ran up the path and slipped back down again. This time everybody dodged except Aku Aku who got hit in with Crash.
Soon everybody had stopped falling in the water and had finally got somewhere (Hallelujah) and were progressing along the lily pad path without falling in at all (Well done!).
Soon Crash + co. came to a fallen pillar in the water.
"Stupid author," he said, "Just because he is to lazy to actually go on this adventure, and all he has to do is write"
Author: Listen, you. If I weren't writing you wouldn't even be on this adventure, all you'd be doing is sitting at home drinking your wumpa fruit juice, sitting outside your hut and doing nothing.
"I fail to see what is so bad about that." said Crash. Everyone agreed.
Author: Shut up. The almighty CheatMasta ownz you!
"Actually, Naughty Dog ownz us!" Crash said Matter-of-factly
"So your name is CheatMaster?" asked Coco
CheatMasta(Author):No, my name is CheatMasta, with an A at the end.
"Same thing" said Coco
CheatMasta: No it isn't, now hurry up and do what your'e supposed to do!
"Oh yeah," said Crash, "what if we don't wanna continue on this quest?"
CheatMasta (Me) sets Crash's hair on fire. Crash screams and dips his head into the water.
"Well I still ain't going" said Aku Aku stubbornly
"Me neither" said Crunch
"Copy cat" Aku Aku said
"Stupid piece of firewood" said Crunch
"Bring it on!" threatened Aku Aku
"I will" said Crunch
CheatMasta: Oh just shut up will you!
CheatMasta creates a portal and sucks down Crunch and Aku Aku.
"If you hate us too," queried Crash, "why didn't you just suck us down?"
CheatMasta: Because my story would suck without any characters
"Dude, your story sucks anyway" said Crash
CheatMasta: If you weren't my main character!!
"Where'd they go?" asked Coco
CheatMasta: To HELL!
In Hell ---------------------------
We see Crunch and Aku Aku surrounded by beautiful she-bandicoots and err.. she-masks
In even worse hell. I mean in the adventure ----------
CheatMasta: Thank god they're gone anyway, I got sick of typing Aku Aku, and Crunch didn't do anything, he just tagged along
"Well, let's go" said Crash, "We've been on this pillar for ages now"
So our new, smaller, band of merry men... I mean band of heroes (cough) set on their way towards the next waterfall and after that, to the warp pad.
"There he goes," said Crash, "coughing again"
CheatMasta: I have asthma!
"Oh, sorry"
Our new gang got to the part with the moving lily pad.
"What do we do here" asked Spyro
"We jump on the moving lily pad, then on the next one until we come to a rock," explained Crash, "quickly before we sink!"
SPLASH!
Too late!
Spyro + friends swam back to the surface and grabbed the moving lily pad. They climbed up on the lily pad and jumped over to the next pad, and then to the rock. Crash broke a box and collected the life. The life floated to the stats.
"I thought I flamed those stats" said Spyro, flaming them again. Thy melted away.
"Let's go up the second waterfall" said Crash
So they did.
Spyro and Sonic saw the jumping fish at the top of the waterfall.
"How do we get past the stupid fish?" asked Sonic
Sonic was pinched by a fish. "Ouch!"
Crash explained, "I have to jump in the air and spin at the same time to knock it out"
"I have a better idea" said Spyro
He flamed the fish, it burnt up and crumbled to dust.
"How come you never thought of that earlier" asked Crash, "like when I was knocked down that pit by that stupid plant!"
A fish bit him.
"I said plant!"
The fish bit him again. Spyro flamed it.
"Aaah" Sonic, "flamed fish" He started drooling.
"Well" continued Crash
"Well what?" asked Spyro, confused
Crash sighed, "Look at my question seven lines ago"
"Oh," said Spyro, "Dunno, sometimes I can't think of things until afterwards, and about the plant thing, I wanted to see you fall down the pit"
"Thanks," said Crash, "I love you too!"
"You do?," said Spyro,"thanks" Spyro reached out for a hug. Crash pushed him away.
"It was a figure of speech" he said
Just then, Sonic choked on his own drool.
"Let's get to the warp pad now" said Crash
So they did.
Sonic + aquaintances reached the end warp pad.
"I can't wait!" said Coco
"What for?" asked Sonic
"Next time it will be 'Coco + pals' or something like that"
Sonic shrugged and leapt into the portal after Crash and Spyro. Coco was about to jump in when...
CheatMasta: Coco, don't get your hopes up. Next time it will be 'Crash + (whatever)'.
"Why don't I get to be affiliated with anybody?" asked Coco
CheatMasta: Because your'e still crap!
"Hey" shouted Coco
CheatMasta shoots a bolt of lightning at Coco, sending her flying into the portal.
------------------------------------ Next: Papu Papu
Now end
Right now
STOP! R+R please