DISCLAIMER: I do not own anything to do with Buffy the Vampire Slayer - it
all belongs to Joss Whedon.
Author's Note: In this chapter, Buffy is acting like a bit of a 'bitca' (as Xander would say), and you might think it's a bit unlike her. . .but it will all be explained and get better, I promise.
Chapter 9
The next morning, Buffy woke up late, stretching and rubbing her eyes as if she'd slept a hundred years. Just as she was about to stand up, she remembered all the exhausting events of the previous night, and felt like going straight back to bed.
Spike was alive. Anya was alive. It would all be different.
She didn't want to think of the long discussions ahead of her - the tears, the pain - but then at the same time the possible happiness that was like the light at the end of the tunnel. She knew she'd have to face it eventually, and feeling like a school girl getting ready for a tiring week of tests, she collected up enough strength to get up, get dressed and take a shower.
She clambered down the stairs, and found in the dining room that she was the last person up. Willow, Kennedy, Dawn, and the new faces of Anya and Cordelia, were all sitting around the table eating their breakfast of cereal or toast.
'Hey. . .morning. . .' Kennedy said hesitantly. Obviously, nobody was being too cheerful or social because they didn't know how they could react at this point. It was all a huge mixture of emotions to express anything.
'Good morning,' Buffy replied only out of politeness. 'Where are Xander and Spike?'
Even as she said that, it felt strange coming out of her mouth.
'They're on their way here,' Dawn answered her. 'Looks like we've got a big talk ahead of us. . .'
Cordelia sensed the tension, and felt that she didn't need to be a part of this. 'Listen guys. . .thanks a lot for giving me a place for the night.but I'm all well rested now, so I better be getting back.'
'No, Cordelia, you don't have to go,' Buffy said. 'Really, you're always welcome here; you were once a part of the gang.'
Cordelia smiled weakly. 'Thanks, but if I'm being perfectly honest-
'As you always are. . .' Willow muttered under her breath.
'I wouldn't like to be present at the big emotional party that's gonna be held here. Besides - you guys have a lot of things to sort out, and you hardly need me around.'
'Alright,' Buffy agreed. 'If that's how you feel, you better go now. Say Hi to Angel for me,' she added.
'Sure,' Cordelia nodded, got up from her breakfast and went to the door, fetching her coat on the way. 'Tell Xander and Spike I'm sorry that I didn't get to say goodbye.' And with a final wave, she closed the door behind her, leaving the house.
An awkward silence echoed among the five remaining girls, who just looked at each other for a minute. Normally, they would've had so much to say, but now it seemed as if their throats were clogged up by some invisible force. Suddenly, Buffy realised she hadn't had breakfast, and sat down to join them all.
A few minutes later, a key going into a lock was heard, and Xander and Spike walked in through the door. Unfortunately for Spike, he had needed a desperate change of clothes, and the only thing Xander could offer him was a ridiculous baggy T-shirt, with something about skater boys on the front, and a pair of long baggy shorts. The outfit was the most unlikely thing someone like Spike would ever wear, only beaten perhaps by the Hawaiian shirt he had worn when he was hiding from the Initiative in Xander's basement.
As he caught the bizarre glances the rest of the group gave him, he lifted his finger up. 'Not one word about the clothes. It was the only thing this moron could give me.' The rest of them laughed silently, and for a split second, it seemed to Buffy as if everything had returned back to normal, and those 6 months of misery had never existed. But when she came back to reality, she felt a jolt in her stomach and a slight dread of what awaited her.
'Hey guys, come have some breakfast,' Dawn offered pleasantly.
'No thanks, we already ate,' Xander put his hand in front of him refusing. Spike scoffed.
'Speak for yourself. I could hardly call what you scraped together "breakfast".' He settled himself down at the table and helped himself to some toast and butter.
After the generally silent breakfast, they all made their way to the living room. The seven all put themselves onto a sofa or a chair and for a few minutes sat in silence, which was broken by Buffy.
'So now what?'
They'd all been surprised by her voice, considering they had hardly heard it at all that morning. Spike felt his heart being tugged lightly as she spoke.
'I think we need to talk more about the reason why Spike and Anya came back,' Xander suggested.
'But we've already told you everything we know about that,' Anya complained.
'Remember - the Voice, the resurrection, the back of the car. . .'
'Yeah, but that still doesn't explain why you guys came back. . .' Dawn commented.
'You know as much as we do,' Spike explained. 'The most plausible explanation, and what is probably the right one, was that we came back because we had done "something remarkable", and we in a way had "unfinished business" on Earth.'
'Yeah, I was told I wasn't even meant to have died, that it was just an accident,' Anya smiled brightly.
'Hey guys, I hate to butt in on the discussion,' Willow interrupted. 'But I don't think we should be worrying about why they came back at all, but more about what they can do now that they are back.' Kennedy nodded in agreement.
'Yeah, that's what I'm mainly interested in too,' Spike confirmed.
'Well, they could get jobs,' Dawn suggested hopefully.
'Except for the fact that I have no qualifications,' Spike said depressingly. 'Apart from perhaps "murderous vampire for a hundred years", and Anya's only experience is owning the Magic Box, which she can't prove she's worked in considering Sunnydale's been destroyed along with everything else in it.' The rest of them sighed deeply.
'In the meantime you guys can just stay where you are,' Dawn said.
'Yeah, but they need to bring in some kind of income,' Buffy said wisely. 'Because Kennedy's waitressing and Willow's part-time CIA deal isn't gonna pay for your schooling, along with food for me and Anya.'
'And my building isn't gonna do a lot to help me and Spike afford luxuries.' Xander added on to Buffy's thought.
'Buffy, you could start by getting a job,' Dawn suggested slightly cruelly.
'It's not as if I'm not trying!' Buffy protested. 'There's just not a whole lot of places that are gonna accept 'slayer' on my CV.' Dawn continued to glare at her sister.
'Now, Dawn, there's no need to be rude to your sister,' Spike settled. 'Despite the difficulties Anya and I have with starting off, we'll try our best.'
'Absolutely,' Anya assured. 'You guys don't mind me staying here for a while though? Because I can't think of a decent career that will help me afford a place in the next year.'
'As long as you bring some kind of income into the house, space-wise it works out fine,' Kennedy said.
'Then Spike and I will start applying for jobs straight away,' Anya said in an upbeat voice. 'Won't we Spike?'
'Yeah,' he had been looking at Buffy and suddenly was shaken out of his temporary trance. 'Yep, straight away.'
'I think we should take everything else regarding Spike and Anya's return slowly,' Willow said. 'It's not something very easy to get used to, but maybe after time it'll all seem normal, as if nothing ever happened.'
'It's not that simple!' Buffy snapped suddenly that a couple of people jumped. She recalled her conversation with Dawn the previous night. 'You think two people can just come back from the dead, and we sit and talk here nicely about living arrangements?!' Buffy was getting infuriated. The rest of them were looking at her, shocked. 'Are you all brain-dead?! We're making small talk, when there are so many unresolved issues going on that we don't know where to begin!'
Dawn stood up so that she could look down at her sister. 'You think we don't feel that Buffy? You think we don't feel the fear in front of us, the crazed thoughts going through our minds at this moment? We're feeling everything you are, except we're mature enough to accept it like human beings.'
Buffy stood up and was almost at her sister's height. 'How dare-
'How dare I what? Stand up to you?' she challenged. 'Quit being a child. You think we don't know that there are all these unresolved issues? You think we have enough energy to tackle them all at once?' Buffy stood and stared at her, clearly unsatisfied.
'We all need to take it one step at a time,' Dawn continued. 'You're the brain-dead one thinking we can all sort it out right now. I know you're anxious to get all your feelings for Spike out in the open, but.' she realised she'd gone too far, as Buffy stood there open-mouthed. If she had been a cartoon character, steam would have been coming out of her ears at this point.
'Dammit, Dawn, all roads don't lead to my feelings for Spike, so quit using it as an excuse!' she shouted.
'Don't you think you're being a bit ridiculous with the way your acting about this, as if you're extra special and need all the attention?!' Dawn shouted back. This comment was replied by Buffy with a slap in the face to Dawn.
'Whoa, guys, stop the bitch-fighting!' Xander jumped up and separated them, and they continued to look at each other with great loathing. Spike seemed to be left in the most awkward position out of all of them.
'You know what,' Buffy angrily said. 'I don't care if you all turn on me like you did before, but I know I'm right. This is something that has to be dealt with, and not acted upon as if it's just another normal thing.' With that, she walked out the room, her head held high as she climbed the stairs to retreat back to her bedroom.
Author's Note: In this chapter, Buffy is acting like a bit of a 'bitca' (as Xander would say), and you might think it's a bit unlike her. . .but it will all be explained and get better, I promise.
Chapter 9
The next morning, Buffy woke up late, stretching and rubbing her eyes as if she'd slept a hundred years. Just as she was about to stand up, she remembered all the exhausting events of the previous night, and felt like going straight back to bed.
Spike was alive. Anya was alive. It would all be different.
She didn't want to think of the long discussions ahead of her - the tears, the pain - but then at the same time the possible happiness that was like the light at the end of the tunnel. She knew she'd have to face it eventually, and feeling like a school girl getting ready for a tiring week of tests, she collected up enough strength to get up, get dressed and take a shower.
She clambered down the stairs, and found in the dining room that she was the last person up. Willow, Kennedy, Dawn, and the new faces of Anya and Cordelia, were all sitting around the table eating their breakfast of cereal or toast.
'Hey. . .morning. . .' Kennedy said hesitantly. Obviously, nobody was being too cheerful or social because they didn't know how they could react at this point. It was all a huge mixture of emotions to express anything.
'Good morning,' Buffy replied only out of politeness. 'Where are Xander and Spike?'
Even as she said that, it felt strange coming out of her mouth.
'They're on their way here,' Dawn answered her. 'Looks like we've got a big talk ahead of us. . .'
Cordelia sensed the tension, and felt that she didn't need to be a part of this. 'Listen guys. . .thanks a lot for giving me a place for the night.but I'm all well rested now, so I better be getting back.'
'No, Cordelia, you don't have to go,' Buffy said. 'Really, you're always welcome here; you were once a part of the gang.'
Cordelia smiled weakly. 'Thanks, but if I'm being perfectly honest-
'As you always are. . .' Willow muttered under her breath.
'I wouldn't like to be present at the big emotional party that's gonna be held here. Besides - you guys have a lot of things to sort out, and you hardly need me around.'
'Alright,' Buffy agreed. 'If that's how you feel, you better go now. Say Hi to Angel for me,' she added.
'Sure,' Cordelia nodded, got up from her breakfast and went to the door, fetching her coat on the way. 'Tell Xander and Spike I'm sorry that I didn't get to say goodbye.' And with a final wave, she closed the door behind her, leaving the house.
An awkward silence echoed among the five remaining girls, who just looked at each other for a minute. Normally, they would've had so much to say, but now it seemed as if their throats were clogged up by some invisible force. Suddenly, Buffy realised she hadn't had breakfast, and sat down to join them all.
A few minutes later, a key going into a lock was heard, and Xander and Spike walked in through the door. Unfortunately for Spike, he had needed a desperate change of clothes, and the only thing Xander could offer him was a ridiculous baggy T-shirt, with something about skater boys on the front, and a pair of long baggy shorts. The outfit was the most unlikely thing someone like Spike would ever wear, only beaten perhaps by the Hawaiian shirt he had worn when he was hiding from the Initiative in Xander's basement.
As he caught the bizarre glances the rest of the group gave him, he lifted his finger up. 'Not one word about the clothes. It was the only thing this moron could give me.' The rest of them laughed silently, and for a split second, it seemed to Buffy as if everything had returned back to normal, and those 6 months of misery had never existed. But when she came back to reality, she felt a jolt in her stomach and a slight dread of what awaited her.
'Hey guys, come have some breakfast,' Dawn offered pleasantly.
'No thanks, we already ate,' Xander put his hand in front of him refusing. Spike scoffed.
'Speak for yourself. I could hardly call what you scraped together "breakfast".' He settled himself down at the table and helped himself to some toast and butter.
After the generally silent breakfast, they all made their way to the living room. The seven all put themselves onto a sofa or a chair and for a few minutes sat in silence, which was broken by Buffy.
'So now what?'
They'd all been surprised by her voice, considering they had hardly heard it at all that morning. Spike felt his heart being tugged lightly as she spoke.
'I think we need to talk more about the reason why Spike and Anya came back,' Xander suggested.
'But we've already told you everything we know about that,' Anya complained.
'Remember - the Voice, the resurrection, the back of the car. . .'
'Yeah, but that still doesn't explain why you guys came back. . .' Dawn commented.
'You know as much as we do,' Spike explained. 'The most plausible explanation, and what is probably the right one, was that we came back because we had done "something remarkable", and we in a way had "unfinished business" on Earth.'
'Yeah, I was told I wasn't even meant to have died, that it was just an accident,' Anya smiled brightly.
'Hey guys, I hate to butt in on the discussion,' Willow interrupted. 'But I don't think we should be worrying about why they came back at all, but more about what they can do now that they are back.' Kennedy nodded in agreement.
'Yeah, that's what I'm mainly interested in too,' Spike confirmed.
'Well, they could get jobs,' Dawn suggested hopefully.
'Except for the fact that I have no qualifications,' Spike said depressingly. 'Apart from perhaps "murderous vampire for a hundred years", and Anya's only experience is owning the Magic Box, which she can't prove she's worked in considering Sunnydale's been destroyed along with everything else in it.' The rest of them sighed deeply.
'In the meantime you guys can just stay where you are,' Dawn said.
'Yeah, but they need to bring in some kind of income,' Buffy said wisely. 'Because Kennedy's waitressing and Willow's part-time CIA deal isn't gonna pay for your schooling, along with food for me and Anya.'
'And my building isn't gonna do a lot to help me and Spike afford luxuries.' Xander added on to Buffy's thought.
'Buffy, you could start by getting a job,' Dawn suggested slightly cruelly.
'It's not as if I'm not trying!' Buffy protested. 'There's just not a whole lot of places that are gonna accept 'slayer' on my CV.' Dawn continued to glare at her sister.
'Now, Dawn, there's no need to be rude to your sister,' Spike settled. 'Despite the difficulties Anya and I have with starting off, we'll try our best.'
'Absolutely,' Anya assured. 'You guys don't mind me staying here for a while though? Because I can't think of a decent career that will help me afford a place in the next year.'
'As long as you bring some kind of income into the house, space-wise it works out fine,' Kennedy said.
'Then Spike and I will start applying for jobs straight away,' Anya said in an upbeat voice. 'Won't we Spike?'
'Yeah,' he had been looking at Buffy and suddenly was shaken out of his temporary trance. 'Yep, straight away.'
'I think we should take everything else regarding Spike and Anya's return slowly,' Willow said. 'It's not something very easy to get used to, but maybe after time it'll all seem normal, as if nothing ever happened.'
'It's not that simple!' Buffy snapped suddenly that a couple of people jumped. She recalled her conversation with Dawn the previous night. 'You think two people can just come back from the dead, and we sit and talk here nicely about living arrangements?!' Buffy was getting infuriated. The rest of them were looking at her, shocked. 'Are you all brain-dead?! We're making small talk, when there are so many unresolved issues going on that we don't know where to begin!'
Dawn stood up so that she could look down at her sister. 'You think we don't feel that Buffy? You think we don't feel the fear in front of us, the crazed thoughts going through our minds at this moment? We're feeling everything you are, except we're mature enough to accept it like human beings.'
Buffy stood up and was almost at her sister's height. 'How dare-
'How dare I what? Stand up to you?' she challenged. 'Quit being a child. You think we don't know that there are all these unresolved issues? You think we have enough energy to tackle them all at once?' Buffy stood and stared at her, clearly unsatisfied.
'We all need to take it one step at a time,' Dawn continued. 'You're the brain-dead one thinking we can all sort it out right now. I know you're anxious to get all your feelings for Spike out in the open, but.' she realised she'd gone too far, as Buffy stood there open-mouthed. If she had been a cartoon character, steam would have been coming out of her ears at this point.
'Dammit, Dawn, all roads don't lead to my feelings for Spike, so quit using it as an excuse!' she shouted.
'Don't you think you're being a bit ridiculous with the way your acting about this, as if you're extra special and need all the attention?!' Dawn shouted back. This comment was replied by Buffy with a slap in the face to Dawn.
'Whoa, guys, stop the bitch-fighting!' Xander jumped up and separated them, and they continued to look at each other with great loathing. Spike seemed to be left in the most awkward position out of all of them.
'You know what,' Buffy angrily said. 'I don't care if you all turn on me like you did before, but I know I'm right. This is something that has to be dealt with, and not acted upon as if it's just another normal thing.' With that, she walked out the room, her head held high as she climbed the stairs to retreat back to her bedroom.