[Cut to funky but busy comic store, in afternoon, with Ephram behind counter, giving change to anonymous customer, who turns and walks away as door opens and Colin walks in.]
EPHRAM (startled, smiling): Hey!
COLIN (smirking): Hey! I canceled office hours. Nobody comes in Mondays unless I have a quiz scheduled for Tuesday, and I don't even have one Thursday.
EPHRAM (puzzled): What about the gym? Or hoops on the playground?
COLIN (chuckling): They can find a sub for once. Besides … (shrugs and flashes eyebrows up and down) I think I have some house cleaning to do.
[Ephram smiles at Colin as door opens and two tomboyish 18-year-olds walk in. With matching vests, tattoos .. and mullets.]
EPHRAM (almost dropping jaw as he recognizes one of visitors): Delia??
DELIA (grinning): Ephram!
EPHRAM (walks out from behind counter, hugs Delia, and turns toward Colin again): You remember …
COLIN (laughing): Of course I do! You think the amnesia thing was permanent? (Turns to face Delia's companion.) And you are …
DELIA (beaming): This is Star, my androgynous transgender lover.
STAR (shrugging and chuckling): Originally intersex, but after an unsuccessful career at boarding school …
EPHRAM (puzzled): You do look kind of …
STAR: The artist formerly known as Stuart. Or Magilla.
DELIA: The one who stole my Dodgers cap.
EPHRAM: The one Mom gave you? (Turns to Star.) You're lucky we didn't meet then.
STAR (smirking): Yeah. Isn't it ironic? Don't you think?
EPHRAM (closing eyes and putting hand over face): Oh, please, don't start quoting Canadians.
COLIN (laughing and patting Ephram on back): You know, we could've been married by now if we'd just …
EPHRAM (uncovering face and turning toward Colin): Like it'd do us any good when we got home.
COLIN (smirking): I was thinking, though … (glancing toward Delia and Star) … will all this "genderqueer" and "genderfuck" around … plain old gay is getting kind of … boring.
EPHRAM (smirking): Well, we'll have to see what we can do about that … won't we?
STAR (turning toward Delia): I think they want to be … alone for a while.
DELIA (smiling): No problem. We can go check out that adult toy store down the street!
STAR (grinning, wide-eyed): You mean, so you can finally …
DELIA (grinning): Yeah!
EPHRAM (drily, facing Delia): Overshare. So. You still have your key? Remember how to open up the sleeper sofa?
DELIA (rolls eyes): Of course, silly! See you later! [Delia and Star exit, grinning. Ephram and Colin look at each other and grin.]
***
[Cut to Ephram and Colin's bedroom. TO CHANGE RATING, INSERT SEX SCENE WITH FULL NUDITY HERE. In an actual "Queer as Folk" episode there would be about five of these. Maybe six. In one hour. You know, A puts this here, B puts that there, moan, grunt, "Oh yeah!" expletive, expletive, you know the drill. Yeah, right. Like we really get that much. Well, maybe we do some weekends, but … without the visuals, it's … well … anyway. Write it yourself, I'm busy. Hehehe.]
***