The Real World, onboard The USHS (United States Hover Ship) Logos:
"Hurry up Ghost, we're late for our rendezvous! The last time we were late, they got so pissed I think they got us into that car chase on purpose!" Captain Niobe scrambled to her umbilicus chair as her first mate Ghost entered the bridge a half-second later. Sparks the operator plugged them in and went to his command center while his friends made their final preparations inside the Construct.
"Why do you always check your guns? You know they're always clean and loaded, Ghost." Ghost grinned. "Well, someday something might go wrong with the program. It never hurts to make sure." Niobe smiled as she dialed her cell phone and said "Yeah, whatever... Sparks, have you got the location for our meeting?" Sparks parked himself before the array of LCD screens and double checked their positions, responded in the affirmative and pushed the "enter" button. Almost instantly there was a strange beeping alarm, and Sparks looked around the screens to see what the matter was. "Oh no," he thought as he found the source of the alarm: Niobe and Ghost's cell phones had completely disappeared; in fact, according to the Matrix, their cell phones never existed.... and either did their weapons.
"Ooooh great, what's happened now?"
The Matrix, Central City, West Avenue Park:
The strange, oppressively bright light nearly stunned Niobe as she arrived at the park for their meeting with their partners within the Matrix. It had been less then a week since they had thwarted yet another of the Merovingian's plans to cause chaos within the Matrix and already there were rumors of yet another plot by the nefarious Frenchman and his seductress wife Persephone. Niobe leaned against a lamp post, tried to look casual, caught a glance of Ghost and nearly died laughing.
"Ghost! Why are you dressed like Seraph?" Ghost didn't respond, as he looked as though he had gone into shock. After about a minute of staring at his captain, he managed to squeak out "M-me?! What a-about you?!" Niobe was confused. "Me? What about me- whathe****?!!??!" As she spoke, Niobe had brought her hand up to her temple and happened to feel her hair, which was no longer in it's usual tight knots but surprisingly... springy. "Ghost... is my hair all... all puffy?" He nodded weakly. "NOOOOOOO! (to herself: It took me five hours to select this hairdo!)"
Niobe and Ghost quickly scanned their surroundings and began to pick up a subtle change that had taken place within the City. Everywhere they looked it appeared that the City had been time warped back to the 1970s. Oddly, none of the humans living within the city limits seemed to notice that women were suddenly wearing outsized sunglasses and bellbottoms and the men all appeared to growing (or attempting to grow) massive afros. Niobe sighed. This could only be the work of The Merovingian, but she could not fathom what he would gain by transporting Central City back to the era of "The Brady Bunch" and Pet Rocks.
Turning back to Ghost, she then noticed that their two associates had also arrived at the park. One appeared to have escaped the time warping while the other... well, he appeared to be a state of shock. "Forgive my partner," said Agent Elle curtly, casting a withering glance at the young- ish looking man at her side. "Agent Brown appears to have a 'thing' about baby blue polyester leisure suits." Agent Brown (who was indeed clad in the aforementioned hideous outfit) actually had to have his hand held after the strange light interrupted their arrival at the park and had decided that now was a good moment to curl up in a ball under a shady tree and mumble bits of his favorite Rolling Stones songs to himself...
A word about these two Agents. Agent Brown and Agent Elle are complete opposites; how they got paired together is a mystery, though there was a rumor that one of the Chief Agents who enjoys playing matchmaker was involved with the process. Anyhow... personality-wise, Agent Brown is fairly easy-going and could easily pass for a normal human if not for the black suit, wire, and odd haircut; also, though he looks like a graduate student he's actually a somewhat older model of Agent then Agent Elle and can be counted on as a virus detector. The newer Agent Elle on the other hand is all business and her sense of humor comes in three flavors: sarcastic, gallows, and biting. She looks vaguely similar to the black- haired "Sailor Star" chick... guy... person... Er, and now back to the story...
Agent Elle stood over her debilitated partner and muttered a few energizing insults to him (Elle: "Get up! What do you think your ex-partners would have done in a situation like this?" Brown: "Go insane and try to kill me?" Elle: "Well, yes, but they would have tried to stop this virus first!" Brown: "Oh...") while Niobe and Ghost discovered to their horror that their weapons and cell phones did not exist in the 1970s and slowly began to panic. "Hello? Humans?" Agent Elle was now glaring at the two blaxploitation / Kung-fu cosplayers and pointing at a nearby collection of payphones. "I do believe *those* existed in the 1970s?"
This was going to be a long day...
Meanwhile, at Café La Vrai...
Persephone had abandoned her outlandishly wide cuffs in exchange for a more- looking normal pair of hip-huggers and was at the moment roller-skating up and down the aisles of the Café's dining area and talking to her husband. "So what do you plan on doing about this? As amusing as it is, we cannot leave the City like this forever!" The Merovingian sat at a table with his head in his hands and replied in a slightly muffled voice "I know, I know, but I don't know how to get rid of this- this 70's bug!"
Persephone skidded to a stop in front of her husband. "It shouldn't be so hard, my love. Why, it appears to be immeasurably more benign then that dreadful "spiral virus" you put on that little town in Japan and that haunted house virus that ate those five humans!" "That was different! I *planned* those, my love! This thing's completely random... I have no idea if I can get rid of it because I have no idea what buttons were pushed when your little purse landed on the keys! Perhaps," he said grimly, "We may have to ask the good guys for help..." Persephone rolled her eyes in disgust. "Hmph! How embarrassing, and you call yourself the greatest programmer since the Architect... Oh Miro! Have you finished with all the delightfully tacky decorations?" "(Mutter mumble grumble)" "WHAT was that, MINION??" "Er... Nearly done... Milady... -_-;; "
As punishment for accidentally spreading the 1970s programming, Miro was being forced to wear a more elaborate, (shudder) orange, pink, and lime green costume with extra beads, fringe, and a matching hat in addition to a pair of roller skates and was at the moment putting up all the remaining crepe paper and cellophane decorations without the aid of a ladder. Being a supernatural creature-type rogue program, this wouldn't have been so difficult if not for the fact that the elaborately beaded fringe kept getting caught in the cellophane streamers and the addition of the roller skates caused her to constantly crash to the floor, leaving skid marks along the walls and a small portion of the ceiling of Café La Vrai.
It was a very sore Vamp who skated dejectedly out the door of the dining room... and immediately ran into the Twins. "Dear Lord," she thought, "They were RIGHT! Their costumes *are* worse then this fruity atrocity!"
The Twins, for once, were not dressed identically, which made the scene even more disarming. Twin One, the more outgoing of the two brothers and Miro's secret crush, had his hair in a frizzy platinum-blond afro and was clad in a shiny, dark purple leather coat with matching pants and pimp hat. He even had a cane, which was topped by a crown, and oddly enough seemed to be actually enjoying wearing his costume. Twin Two, who was somewhat more subdued and teased Miro endlessly about her crush by pretending to be his brother, was wearing a goldenrod polyester leisure suit, and unlike his brother looked like he couldn't wait for their masters' party to be over so he could burn this affront to fashion and dance upon its ashes.
After staring at each other's outfits for a full twenty seconds, they almost died laughing for an additional five minutes. The Merovingian heard them, thought the three were laughing at him for some reason, and punished them by making them all redecorate the Café's dining room... by hand, without the aid of their powers and wearing roller skates. "I'm torn," commented Persephone as she observed Miro blushing as One handed her a roll of red crepe paper as she hung upside down from a chandelier. "About what, my love?" said the Merovingian wearily. After several hours of checking he was no closer to either finding a way to get rid of the 1970s from Central City or getting a costume for their party. "About whether it would be a good or bad thing if this virus doesn't go away." The Merovingian sighed. "It would be a bad thing, my love. This 1970s 'virus' is not a... a timeline, you might say. The City could be stuck like the 70s forever if no cure is found." "So that would mean no progress? No advancements?" "I do not know, ma cheri. Perhaps not, or perhaps a cure might be found either by my brilliant self or (he grimaced) ...maybe one of the good guys."
Persephone thought about the idea of no new fashions and being forced to watch reruns for the rest of her existence, and about their impending party. "Do hurry up! If you cannot manage it, perhaps I shall send out Miro and the Twins-" there was a crash as the three goons heard their names, had an ominous feeling and lost their balance while all three were perched on a really tall ladder "-to find those four we tangled with last time." There was a collective groan from the tangled mass of orange and yellow polyester and purple leather.
Elsewhere in Central city, Agent Brown, Agent Elle, Niobe, and Ghost all sneezed at the same time. "Somebody's thinking about us. I hope it's something nice," thought Niobe as she calmly told a panicked Sparks that No, they did not want to be taken out of the Matrix and to send down some era-appropriate weapons. "Would you prefer a golden gun or a set of ninja stars, Captain?" Niobe sighed. "Both, if you can spare them, Sparks. I think we'll be needing all the help we can get..."
To be continued...
Notes: Everything I know about Niobe, Ghost, and Sparks' personalities is based on a few film clips and my imagination. I don't know whether my two Agents are Original Characters or not... let's just settle for Brown being severely Out-of-character and Elle being semi-original. I swear, I'll write more about "the good guys" in the next chapter, but it's just so much fun to write about the Merovingian and his gang!
PS: "I Love the 70s" is a very funny mini-series about pop culture history of the 1970s on VH1; "Cosplay" refers to people who dress up as their favorite cartoon/comic/anime/movie/TV characters at conventions; The "Sailor Stars" were three severely gender-confused/confusing characters from the anime "Sailor Moon." Three essentially female humanoid aliens were posing as a super-popular boy band in order to find a specific teenaged girl. The black-haired one I site actually *hits* on Serena/Usagi, I think. -_-;
"Hurry up Ghost, we're late for our rendezvous! The last time we were late, they got so pissed I think they got us into that car chase on purpose!" Captain Niobe scrambled to her umbilicus chair as her first mate Ghost entered the bridge a half-second later. Sparks the operator plugged them in and went to his command center while his friends made their final preparations inside the Construct.
"Why do you always check your guns? You know they're always clean and loaded, Ghost." Ghost grinned. "Well, someday something might go wrong with the program. It never hurts to make sure." Niobe smiled as she dialed her cell phone and said "Yeah, whatever... Sparks, have you got the location for our meeting?" Sparks parked himself before the array of LCD screens and double checked their positions, responded in the affirmative and pushed the "enter" button. Almost instantly there was a strange beeping alarm, and Sparks looked around the screens to see what the matter was. "Oh no," he thought as he found the source of the alarm: Niobe and Ghost's cell phones had completely disappeared; in fact, according to the Matrix, their cell phones never existed.... and either did their weapons.
"Ooooh great, what's happened now?"
The Matrix, Central City, West Avenue Park:
The strange, oppressively bright light nearly stunned Niobe as she arrived at the park for their meeting with their partners within the Matrix. It had been less then a week since they had thwarted yet another of the Merovingian's plans to cause chaos within the Matrix and already there were rumors of yet another plot by the nefarious Frenchman and his seductress wife Persephone. Niobe leaned against a lamp post, tried to look casual, caught a glance of Ghost and nearly died laughing.
"Ghost! Why are you dressed like Seraph?" Ghost didn't respond, as he looked as though he had gone into shock. After about a minute of staring at his captain, he managed to squeak out "M-me?! What a-about you?!" Niobe was confused. "Me? What about me- whathe****?!!??!" As she spoke, Niobe had brought her hand up to her temple and happened to feel her hair, which was no longer in it's usual tight knots but surprisingly... springy. "Ghost... is my hair all... all puffy?" He nodded weakly. "NOOOOOOO! (to herself: It took me five hours to select this hairdo!)"
Niobe and Ghost quickly scanned their surroundings and began to pick up a subtle change that had taken place within the City. Everywhere they looked it appeared that the City had been time warped back to the 1970s. Oddly, none of the humans living within the city limits seemed to notice that women were suddenly wearing outsized sunglasses and bellbottoms and the men all appeared to growing (or attempting to grow) massive afros. Niobe sighed. This could only be the work of The Merovingian, but she could not fathom what he would gain by transporting Central City back to the era of "The Brady Bunch" and Pet Rocks.
Turning back to Ghost, she then noticed that their two associates had also arrived at the park. One appeared to have escaped the time warping while the other... well, he appeared to be a state of shock. "Forgive my partner," said Agent Elle curtly, casting a withering glance at the young- ish looking man at her side. "Agent Brown appears to have a 'thing' about baby blue polyester leisure suits." Agent Brown (who was indeed clad in the aforementioned hideous outfit) actually had to have his hand held after the strange light interrupted their arrival at the park and had decided that now was a good moment to curl up in a ball under a shady tree and mumble bits of his favorite Rolling Stones songs to himself...
A word about these two Agents. Agent Brown and Agent Elle are complete opposites; how they got paired together is a mystery, though there was a rumor that one of the Chief Agents who enjoys playing matchmaker was involved with the process. Anyhow... personality-wise, Agent Brown is fairly easy-going and could easily pass for a normal human if not for the black suit, wire, and odd haircut; also, though he looks like a graduate student he's actually a somewhat older model of Agent then Agent Elle and can be counted on as a virus detector. The newer Agent Elle on the other hand is all business and her sense of humor comes in three flavors: sarcastic, gallows, and biting. She looks vaguely similar to the black- haired "Sailor Star" chick... guy... person... Er, and now back to the story...
Agent Elle stood over her debilitated partner and muttered a few energizing insults to him (Elle: "Get up! What do you think your ex-partners would have done in a situation like this?" Brown: "Go insane and try to kill me?" Elle: "Well, yes, but they would have tried to stop this virus first!" Brown: "Oh...") while Niobe and Ghost discovered to their horror that their weapons and cell phones did not exist in the 1970s and slowly began to panic. "Hello? Humans?" Agent Elle was now glaring at the two blaxploitation / Kung-fu cosplayers and pointing at a nearby collection of payphones. "I do believe *those* existed in the 1970s?"
This was going to be a long day...
Meanwhile, at Café La Vrai...
Persephone had abandoned her outlandishly wide cuffs in exchange for a more- looking normal pair of hip-huggers and was at the moment roller-skating up and down the aisles of the Café's dining area and talking to her husband. "So what do you plan on doing about this? As amusing as it is, we cannot leave the City like this forever!" The Merovingian sat at a table with his head in his hands and replied in a slightly muffled voice "I know, I know, but I don't know how to get rid of this- this 70's bug!"
Persephone skidded to a stop in front of her husband. "It shouldn't be so hard, my love. Why, it appears to be immeasurably more benign then that dreadful "spiral virus" you put on that little town in Japan and that haunted house virus that ate those five humans!" "That was different! I *planned* those, my love! This thing's completely random... I have no idea if I can get rid of it because I have no idea what buttons were pushed when your little purse landed on the keys! Perhaps," he said grimly, "We may have to ask the good guys for help..." Persephone rolled her eyes in disgust. "Hmph! How embarrassing, and you call yourself the greatest programmer since the Architect... Oh Miro! Have you finished with all the delightfully tacky decorations?" "(Mutter mumble grumble)" "WHAT was that, MINION??" "Er... Nearly done... Milady... -_-;; "
As punishment for accidentally spreading the 1970s programming, Miro was being forced to wear a more elaborate, (shudder) orange, pink, and lime green costume with extra beads, fringe, and a matching hat in addition to a pair of roller skates and was at the moment putting up all the remaining crepe paper and cellophane decorations without the aid of a ladder. Being a supernatural creature-type rogue program, this wouldn't have been so difficult if not for the fact that the elaborately beaded fringe kept getting caught in the cellophane streamers and the addition of the roller skates caused her to constantly crash to the floor, leaving skid marks along the walls and a small portion of the ceiling of Café La Vrai.
It was a very sore Vamp who skated dejectedly out the door of the dining room... and immediately ran into the Twins. "Dear Lord," she thought, "They were RIGHT! Their costumes *are* worse then this fruity atrocity!"
The Twins, for once, were not dressed identically, which made the scene even more disarming. Twin One, the more outgoing of the two brothers and Miro's secret crush, had his hair in a frizzy platinum-blond afro and was clad in a shiny, dark purple leather coat with matching pants and pimp hat. He even had a cane, which was topped by a crown, and oddly enough seemed to be actually enjoying wearing his costume. Twin Two, who was somewhat more subdued and teased Miro endlessly about her crush by pretending to be his brother, was wearing a goldenrod polyester leisure suit, and unlike his brother looked like he couldn't wait for their masters' party to be over so he could burn this affront to fashion and dance upon its ashes.
After staring at each other's outfits for a full twenty seconds, they almost died laughing for an additional five minutes. The Merovingian heard them, thought the three were laughing at him for some reason, and punished them by making them all redecorate the Café's dining room... by hand, without the aid of their powers and wearing roller skates. "I'm torn," commented Persephone as she observed Miro blushing as One handed her a roll of red crepe paper as she hung upside down from a chandelier. "About what, my love?" said the Merovingian wearily. After several hours of checking he was no closer to either finding a way to get rid of the 1970s from Central City or getting a costume for their party. "About whether it would be a good or bad thing if this virus doesn't go away." The Merovingian sighed. "It would be a bad thing, my love. This 1970s 'virus' is not a... a timeline, you might say. The City could be stuck like the 70s forever if no cure is found." "So that would mean no progress? No advancements?" "I do not know, ma cheri. Perhaps not, or perhaps a cure might be found either by my brilliant self or (he grimaced) ...maybe one of the good guys."
Persephone thought about the idea of no new fashions and being forced to watch reruns for the rest of her existence, and about their impending party. "Do hurry up! If you cannot manage it, perhaps I shall send out Miro and the Twins-" there was a crash as the three goons heard their names, had an ominous feeling and lost their balance while all three were perched on a really tall ladder "-to find those four we tangled with last time." There was a collective groan from the tangled mass of orange and yellow polyester and purple leather.
Elsewhere in Central city, Agent Brown, Agent Elle, Niobe, and Ghost all sneezed at the same time. "Somebody's thinking about us. I hope it's something nice," thought Niobe as she calmly told a panicked Sparks that No, they did not want to be taken out of the Matrix and to send down some era-appropriate weapons. "Would you prefer a golden gun or a set of ninja stars, Captain?" Niobe sighed. "Both, if you can spare them, Sparks. I think we'll be needing all the help we can get..."
To be continued...
Notes: Everything I know about Niobe, Ghost, and Sparks' personalities is based on a few film clips and my imagination. I don't know whether my two Agents are Original Characters or not... let's just settle for Brown being severely Out-of-character and Elle being semi-original. I swear, I'll write more about "the good guys" in the next chapter, but it's just so much fun to write about the Merovingian and his gang!
PS: "I Love the 70s" is a very funny mini-series about pop culture history of the 1970s on VH1; "Cosplay" refers to people who dress up as their favorite cartoon/comic/anime/movie/TV characters at conventions; The "Sailor Stars" were three severely gender-confused/confusing characters from the anime "Sailor Moon." Three essentially female humanoid aliens were posing as a super-popular boy band in order to find a specific teenaged girl. The black-haired one I site actually *hits* on Serena/Usagi, I think. -_-;