Halloween Hijinks
To Red Witch: Oh Kelly will get his shares of scares and torture. I mean, it's just so much fun to drive him to the madhouse (Kelly: *in a strait jacket* THEY'RE COMING TO GET ME!!! THEY'RE COMING TO GET ME!!!! HELP ME!!!!) Anyway, if you ask me nicely, I might give Duncan a Halloween fright!
To RogueFanKC: Oh the little feud between Shipwreck and Bulldog shall continue. Storm is dressed up as the Bride of Frankenstein in this fic, and who knows what'll happen.
To Wizard1: Well, I have no idea where my ideas come from. I just make it up as I go along. I have to admit, I saw Scarface and I could see Jamie as him when he grows up. I will put in some Duncan torture. And I don't think Darkstar will ever live this Halloween down. Don't forget, Rogue has been "convincing" (Forge: MORE LIKE ABUSING ME!!!) into working on a power dampener for her. (Forge: HELP ME!!!!) BTW, Rogue isn't dressed as the superheroine Vampirella. I heard that a female vampire is technically called a vampirella.
To Mysterious wanderer: Glad you like my fic! Everybody loves Scottish Beast.
Chapter 3: Zombies and Vampires, oh my!
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"Kitty's mine!" Lance shoved Peter.
"No, she's mine!" Peter shoved Lance back.
"Try that again, and I'll terminate you, you Arnold rip-off!" Lance snapped.
"I dare you, you Tarzan wannabe!" Peter taunted back.
"I AM CONAN!!!!" Lance roared, about to summon an earthquake, but he suddenly got an idea. He yelled out, imitating Peter's Russian-accented voice. "Scotland sucks!"
"What?" Peter scratched his head. "GAHHH!!!" A drunken Tony Stark and Beast jumped Colossus and started wailing on him. "Hey! Ow! Watch it! What the-- ?! OW!!!" Lance laughed at this.
"Oh yeah." Lance grinned. "Hey Kitty, come dance with me!"
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Senator Robert Kelly walked by the cemetery. It was dark, and a creepy fog set in.
"Brrr, it's cold." Kelly groaned. He wore a thick coat, but something about the fog made his bones freeze. "Man, cemeteries sure are creepy here at night. God, I hope there are no zombies here." This was a little known fact about Senator Kelly: He believed zombies were real. The unlucky bigoted jerk, I mean, Senator Kelly suddenly heard a moan. "Oh no. What was that?" He noticed the moan came from the cemetery. "Maybe somebody needs help." He walked into the cemetery, running into a couple guards. "What's up fellas?"
"We've heard rumors of grave robbers here." Guard #1 snickered. "Sounds silly, I know."
"Yeah, but we'll catch 'em." Guard #2 replied. "We're here to stake 'em out."
"Good luck." Kelly smiled, walking away from them into the cemetery. He heard the moan again. It sounded like someone needed help. "Hang on! I'm coming! Keep talking!" He continued hearing the moan until he found the source. It was a tombstone with "Some Dead Hot Chick" written on it. Kelly groaned.
"Oh brother. One of those fancy prank tombstones kids put out." Kelly snickered as he turned and walked away. "I worry too much." He didn't notice a hand burst out of the ground. A female zombie emerged, with a mane of blonde hair and clad in a torn-up pink dress. She snuck up on Kelly and said one word.
"Boo." The zombie said. Kelly turned around. At that moment, he let out the longest, loudest, highest-pitched, girliest, most-effeminate scream in the history of man.
"HELP ME!!!! ZOMBIE!!!! ZOMBIES ARE IN BAYVILLE!!!!" The Senator ran away, the zombie woman in hot pursuit. She tried to grab at Kelly, but ended up tearing off his pants. The senator screamed like a banshee after inhaling massive amounts of helium. The zombie woman caught up to Kelly. At that point, two flashlights shone on them. The zombie woman played dead at that second. The two guards Kelly saw earlier approached. And they looked disgusted.
"Aw man, that's sick!" Guard #1 retched. A shocked Kelly looked down at himself and the zombie and himself, then at the guards.
"Hey wait, this ain't what it looks like!" Kelly squeaked.
"Look! He ain't got no pants on!" Guard #2 pointed. The two guards picked Kelly up and cuffed him.
"Hey! Wait! You don't understand!" Kelly appealed. "That's a zombie! It tried to kill me!" The two guards laughed.
"Yeah right!" They laughed.
"C'mon, you sick pervert!" Guard #2 ordered. The two pulled a screaming and yelling Kelly away. The zombie poked her head up, and snickered.
"Moron."
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A knock was heard at the X-Mansion's door.
"This Kid of Rock'll get it!" Razor said. "Finally, you show up." Cap was dressed like he was in the American Revolution, Wasp was clad as a fairy, and Hank Pym was dressed like a cockroach. "Those costumes are appropriate for you."
"Hey Razor, we brought someone with us. That's why we took so long." Wasp said. "A big fan of yours." Razor looked at the accompanying person and his eyes widened in shock. He spun his head to the three elder Avengers quickly and angrily.
"You six-legged snotty daughter of a..." Razor growled.
"Think of it was payback for when you covered my bedroom in shaving cream." Wasp smiled evilly.
"Don't look at me, Razor." Cap groaned. Dr. Pym laughed.
"She should keep your guitar-playing self occupied." The blond scientist laughed. Razor's green eyes glowed with the Power of Rock. His eyes usually glowed when he was really mad.
"Must...not...impale...fellow...teammates...on...guitar..." Razor growled, shaking with anger. He did not want her to be here tonight. (A/N: If you read "Birth of a Juke Box Hero", then you'll know who's here). More screams and yells were heard.
"FOOD FIGHT!!!!"
"THOU SHALT FEEL MJOLNIR'S FURY!!!!"
"HELP ME!!!!"
"WANDA, GET THIS COLLAR OFF ME!!!"
"I HATE THAT STARCHILD!!!!"
"OWWWWWCH!!!!"
"NO, JOHN!!!!"
"WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!"
"WHO PULLED MY TAIL?!?!"
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The creepy castle not too far down the road from the X-Mansion was a building pretty much ignored by the rest of town. Inside its creepy exterior, it was decorated like a beautiful mansion. We shift our focus to a room. It looked like the living room of a rich family, with a fancy entertainment system in a mahogany rack. A teenage girl was lying across the couch in front of a big-screen TV. She had slightly pale skin, but she was very beautiful. The only thing odd about her was the fact that her eyes and hair were bright purple. She wore a black tanktop with "0% Angel" on it, and purple leather pants, with wooden sandals. She was eating popcorn, watching a cheesy Halloween movie. She let out a bored yawn, revealing fangs. A glass next to her was filled with a red liquid with ice in it.
"Man, I'm bored." The girl groaned. "Mom and Dad are out to some fancy vampire function, and they leave me here alone." A butler walked in. He looked like a stereotypical butler, complete with snooty English accent.
"Miss Zabella, are you alright?" The butler asked.
"I am bored, Jenkins." The teenage purple-haired vampire sighed. "I want to go out and have some fun." The butler sighed.
"Miss Zabella, you know your parents' rules: No going out while they're gone." Jenkins replied.
"But I'm bored!" She whined. "And it's Halloween! The one day where us vampires can go out and not be met with screams!" Her purple eyes flashed, and a crystal ball flew towards her. "I'll use this to find out where there's some fun." She concentrated, and the milky white fog of the ball dissipated, showing the party at the X-Mansion. "Ooh!" She squealed. "A party! Some perfect Halloween fun!" The ball's view moved to Starchild. "Whoa! Stop!" She observed the mutant with a gleam in her eye. "What a dreamboat!"
"Who's that?" Jenkins asked.
"A gorgeous beast, that's who!" She squealed. "When my time to take a mate comes, I want this one! He looks so fantastic in that outfit!"
{Uh oh...Zabella's in her 'boy-hunt' mode again. I fear for this mortal.} The vampire butler groaned in his mind.
Uh oh! Major trouble now! Between zombie sightings and a vampirella after Starchild, this is going to be one heck of a Halloween! What's with the zombies? What'll Zabella do to get Starchild as a mate? Will something bad happen to Duncan? Find out in the next chapter!
To Red Witch: Oh Kelly will get his shares of scares and torture. I mean, it's just so much fun to drive him to the madhouse (Kelly: *in a strait jacket* THEY'RE COMING TO GET ME!!! THEY'RE COMING TO GET ME!!!! HELP ME!!!!) Anyway, if you ask me nicely, I might give Duncan a Halloween fright!
To RogueFanKC: Oh the little feud between Shipwreck and Bulldog shall continue. Storm is dressed up as the Bride of Frankenstein in this fic, and who knows what'll happen.
To Wizard1: Well, I have no idea where my ideas come from. I just make it up as I go along. I have to admit, I saw Scarface and I could see Jamie as him when he grows up. I will put in some Duncan torture. And I don't think Darkstar will ever live this Halloween down. Don't forget, Rogue has been "convincing" (Forge: MORE LIKE ABUSING ME!!!) into working on a power dampener for her. (Forge: HELP ME!!!!) BTW, Rogue isn't dressed as the superheroine Vampirella. I heard that a female vampire is technically called a vampirella.
To Mysterious wanderer: Glad you like my fic! Everybody loves Scottish Beast.
Chapter 3: Zombies and Vampires, oh my!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Kitty's mine!" Lance shoved Peter.
"No, she's mine!" Peter shoved Lance back.
"Try that again, and I'll terminate you, you Arnold rip-off!" Lance snapped.
"I dare you, you Tarzan wannabe!" Peter taunted back.
"I AM CONAN!!!!" Lance roared, about to summon an earthquake, but he suddenly got an idea. He yelled out, imitating Peter's Russian-accented voice. "Scotland sucks!"
"What?" Peter scratched his head. "GAHHH!!!" A drunken Tony Stark and Beast jumped Colossus and started wailing on him. "Hey! Ow! Watch it! What the-- ?! OW!!!" Lance laughed at this.
"Oh yeah." Lance grinned. "Hey Kitty, come dance with me!"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Senator Robert Kelly walked by the cemetery. It was dark, and a creepy fog set in.
"Brrr, it's cold." Kelly groaned. He wore a thick coat, but something about the fog made his bones freeze. "Man, cemeteries sure are creepy here at night. God, I hope there are no zombies here." This was a little known fact about Senator Kelly: He believed zombies were real. The unlucky bigoted jerk, I mean, Senator Kelly suddenly heard a moan. "Oh no. What was that?" He noticed the moan came from the cemetery. "Maybe somebody needs help." He walked into the cemetery, running into a couple guards. "What's up fellas?"
"We've heard rumors of grave robbers here." Guard #1 snickered. "Sounds silly, I know."
"Yeah, but we'll catch 'em." Guard #2 replied. "We're here to stake 'em out."
"Good luck." Kelly smiled, walking away from them into the cemetery. He heard the moan again. It sounded like someone needed help. "Hang on! I'm coming! Keep talking!" He continued hearing the moan until he found the source. It was a tombstone with "Some Dead Hot Chick" written on it. Kelly groaned.
"Oh brother. One of those fancy prank tombstones kids put out." Kelly snickered as he turned and walked away. "I worry too much." He didn't notice a hand burst out of the ground. A female zombie emerged, with a mane of blonde hair and clad in a torn-up pink dress. She snuck up on Kelly and said one word.
"Boo." The zombie said. Kelly turned around. At that moment, he let out the longest, loudest, highest-pitched, girliest, most-effeminate scream in the history of man.
"HELP ME!!!! ZOMBIE!!!! ZOMBIES ARE IN BAYVILLE!!!!" The Senator ran away, the zombie woman in hot pursuit. She tried to grab at Kelly, but ended up tearing off his pants. The senator screamed like a banshee after inhaling massive amounts of helium. The zombie woman caught up to Kelly. At that point, two flashlights shone on them. The zombie woman played dead at that second. The two guards Kelly saw earlier approached. And they looked disgusted.
"Aw man, that's sick!" Guard #1 retched. A shocked Kelly looked down at himself and the zombie and himself, then at the guards.
"Hey wait, this ain't what it looks like!" Kelly squeaked.
"Look! He ain't got no pants on!" Guard #2 pointed. The two guards picked Kelly up and cuffed him.
"Hey! Wait! You don't understand!" Kelly appealed. "That's a zombie! It tried to kill me!" The two guards laughed.
"Yeah right!" They laughed.
"C'mon, you sick pervert!" Guard #2 ordered. The two pulled a screaming and yelling Kelly away. The zombie poked her head up, and snickered.
"Moron."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
A knock was heard at the X-Mansion's door.
"This Kid of Rock'll get it!" Razor said. "Finally, you show up." Cap was dressed like he was in the American Revolution, Wasp was clad as a fairy, and Hank Pym was dressed like a cockroach. "Those costumes are appropriate for you."
"Hey Razor, we brought someone with us. That's why we took so long." Wasp said. "A big fan of yours." Razor looked at the accompanying person and his eyes widened in shock. He spun his head to the three elder Avengers quickly and angrily.
"You six-legged snotty daughter of a..." Razor growled.
"Think of it was payback for when you covered my bedroom in shaving cream." Wasp smiled evilly.
"Don't look at me, Razor." Cap groaned. Dr. Pym laughed.
"She should keep your guitar-playing self occupied." The blond scientist laughed. Razor's green eyes glowed with the Power of Rock. His eyes usually glowed when he was really mad.
"Must...not...impale...fellow...teammates...on...guitar..." Razor growled, shaking with anger. He did not want her to be here tonight. (A/N: If you read "Birth of a Juke Box Hero", then you'll know who's here). More screams and yells were heard.
"FOOD FIGHT!!!!"
"THOU SHALT FEEL MJOLNIR'S FURY!!!!"
"HELP ME!!!!"
"WANDA, GET THIS COLLAR OFF ME!!!"
"I HATE THAT STARCHILD!!!!"
"OWWWWWCH!!!!"
"NO, JOHN!!!!"
"WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!"
"WHO PULLED MY TAIL?!?!"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The creepy castle not too far down the road from the X-Mansion was a building pretty much ignored by the rest of town. Inside its creepy exterior, it was decorated like a beautiful mansion. We shift our focus to a room. It looked like the living room of a rich family, with a fancy entertainment system in a mahogany rack. A teenage girl was lying across the couch in front of a big-screen TV. She had slightly pale skin, but she was very beautiful. The only thing odd about her was the fact that her eyes and hair were bright purple. She wore a black tanktop with "0% Angel" on it, and purple leather pants, with wooden sandals. She was eating popcorn, watching a cheesy Halloween movie. She let out a bored yawn, revealing fangs. A glass next to her was filled with a red liquid with ice in it.
"Man, I'm bored." The girl groaned. "Mom and Dad are out to some fancy vampire function, and they leave me here alone." A butler walked in. He looked like a stereotypical butler, complete with snooty English accent.
"Miss Zabella, are you alright?" The butler asked.
"I am bored, Jenkins." The teenage purple-haired vampire sighed. "I want to go out and have some fun." The butler sighed.
"Miss Zabella, you know your parents' rules: No going out while they're gone." Jenkins replied.
"But I'm bored!" She whined. "And it's Halloween! The one day where us vampires can go out and not be met with screams!" Her purple eyes flashed, and a crystal ball flew towards her. "I'll use this to find out where there's some fun." She concentrated, and the milky white fog of the ball dissipated, showing the party at the X-Mansion. "Ooh!" She squealed. "A party! Some perfect Halloween fun!" The ball's view moved to Starchild. "Whoa! Stop!" She observed the mutant with a gleam in her eye. "What a dreamboat!"
"Who's that?" Jenkins asked.
"A gorgeous beast, that's who!" She squealed. "When my time to take a mate comes, I want this one! He looks so fantastic in that outfit!"
{Uh oh...Zabella's in her 'boy-hunt' mode again. I fear for this mortal.} The vampire butler groaned in his mind.
Uh oh! Major trouble now! Between zombie sightings and a vampirella after Starchild, this is going to be one heck of a Halloween! What's with the zombies? What'll Zabella do to get Starchild as a mate? Will something bad happen to Duncan? Find out in the next chapter!