Chapter 10- Welcome to the Caribbean, Love
The Interceptor crew is all tied up in a loose kind of way so they can easily escape but they can't take over the Pearl because *its* crew can't die and they're out in the middle of the ocean so abandoning ship isn't a good idea so they don't, escape that is. (A/N: Like my run-on?)
Jack is standing in the middle of the Black Pearl crew warily, but still looking very sexy.
"Blow it up," Barbossa orders.
As Elizabeth "frees" herself, the Interceptor suddenly explodes, and she goes, "Oh, no, Will! He's too hot to die." She swipes at Barbossa in retaliation.
"Catfight!" Pintel yells.
Elizabeth and Barbossa have a catfight, and Barbossa wins. "Come here, Elizabeth!" he calls.
"I'm right here," Elizabeth replies, confused.
"No, not you, we named the monkey Elizabeth." To prove his point, the monkey jumps up onto his shoulder.
"I thought you had named the monkey Jack," Jack (Sparrow) protests.
"Well, the monkey has a lot of names," Barbossa replies, shrugging. He turns back to Elizabeth (Swann/Turner) "Well, while you're here, we might as well molest you." He pushes her into a pile of pirates, who start to do just that.
Will somehow coincidentally jumps up on the rail at that moment, picks up Jack's gun, and points it at Barbossa. "Hey! Only *I* get to do that to Elizabeth."
"What the hell are you doing? We can't die, so there's really no point to shooting us."
"Don't do anything stupid," Jack says quietly.
"You can't die," Will says suddenly. "But I can. If you don't let her go I'll pull the trigger. I will! What, you don't believe me?"
"Like that," Jack says, using Will's most recent outburst as an example.
"Will, don't!" Elizabeth shouts.
"Shut up," Barbossa says. "As for you, unless you can give me a good reason why I don't want you to die, I could really care less about what you do. So please, continue with the failing heroic suicide."
"My name is Will Turner. My father was Willy Turner, also known as…" Will lists all the names. "And either you set Elizabeth free, or I'll shoot myself and then you'll *never* be able to break the curse."
"Okay then, name your terms, and we'll give them to you as long as you hand yourself over quietly. Besides the part about Elizabeth, we know that one already."
Will taps his chin. "Well, I suppose I should help someone out. There's probably something useful I could do. Um, the crew is safe, and you name the monkey after me."
"But the monkey's already named Jack!"
"And Elizabeth."
"Well, one more name can't hurt," Barbossa says. "Agreed."
Cut to scene where Elizabeth is walking the plank. "Damn pirates," Will mutters. "I knew I should have thought the negotiation thing through."
Will and Elizabeth exchange meaningful looks for what seems like an hour. Finally, when the pirates are just too bored, they activate the plank-tripwire, and Elizabeth falls into the water, screaming. "Eek!"
"Damn. And she was just starting to let me touch her womanly parts." Will decides to sulk for the rest of the movie until the end with the giant hat.
"Okay, your turn now, Jack."
"I should get my gun at least."
"Yes, I suppose. Where be Jack's pistol?"
"How about two?"
"Um, no." Barbossa throws Jack's pistol overboard, and Jack dives after it.
A few minutes later, Elizabeth and Jack have both washed up on the shore of a deserted island. Except that there was never anyone there, so really "deserted" isn't the right word. Perhaps "empty", or-
Pirates: "Oh, get on with it!"
Ahem yes. Well, Elizabeth is quite happy to see Jack, of course. (Because he's hot.)
While Jack looks for the rumrunners' stash, Elizabeth follows him around, asking him how to get off the island. What she means, however, is just how he gets off. She just does not want to be too obvious.
"How did you get off last time?" she asks, winking.
"Last time…last time I was here for three days, and when the rumrunners came by I hitched a ride," he confessed. "Wouldn't count on that happening again, though. Looks like this stuff has been here for years."
"So," Elizabeth repeats slowly. "You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum? That's the secret adventure of Captain Jack Sparrow?"
"Welcome to the Caribbean, love," Jack says, handing her a bottle.
"Sweet," Elizabeth says, and goes after Jack.
By much later that night, a lot of the rum has disappeared into their mouths. They have a bonfire going, and they're singing a song with really, really bad lyrics. For the rest of this particular scene, the authoress has decided to give some of the readers a treat, and instead of Elizabeth, there is reader-in-love-with-Jack-as-Elizabeth.
"Devils and black sheep and really bad eggs, drink up me hearties yo ho! Yo ho, yo ho a pirate's life for me!" They fall over, laughing.
"That's a great song! Really bad eggs! And when I'm captain of the Pearl again, I'll teach it to the crew, and we'll sing it all the time." Apparently, he wanted this crew to hate him.
"And you will be positively the sexiest man in the Spanish Main."
"Not just the Spanish Main, love. The entire ocean. The entire world."
"It must be terrible for you, Jack. Being stuck here again, I mean." She leans a little closer.
"Well, it's improved a little. The scenery is better, and the company is obviously much, much better, this time, I actually have-"
"Mister Sparrow!" Reader-in-love-with-Jack-as-Elizabeth exclaims, having a naughty idea. "I'm not sure you're quite nude enough for me to allow that kind of talk."
"Ah. I see your point." He strips down to nothing. "Savvy?"
"Much. Okay, continue."
"You see, what a ship is, what the Black Pearl, really is…"
"Wanna fuck?" Reader-in-love-with-Jack-as-Elizabeth asks.
"Do you even have to ask?"
The next morning, Elizabeth and Jack are smoking their cigars or cigarettes or tree branches or whatever they're smoking. All of a sudden they see a ship approaching the island.
"It's the Dauntless! Wow, I can't believe that idiot actually managed to find me," Elizabeth says. "We should get dressed before they arrive. Otherwise my father might offer me his jacket." She shudders at the thought of wearing a blue and green plaid jacket with large white polka dots on the lapels.
Everyone sighs as Jack pulls up his pants. (A/N: Darn.)
So when they finally get on board the Dauntless, and Elizabeth has been given a soldier's uniform to wear, though they probably didn't even have them in her size, she pitches her rescue mission to Norrington.
"Nope. Sorry, we're taking you right home."
"But we have to save Will!"
"Nope. We don't. Anyway, he decided to become a pirate when he stole a ship and all that stuff."
"Commandeered," Jack corrects.
"Please."
"Only if you marry me."
"Yuck! *Sigh* Well, if it's the only way, then okay, I will marry you."
"Yes, I love weddings! Drinks all around!"
"Mister Sparrow-"
"Captain Sparrow, if you don't mind, Commodore."
"Uh, sure. Go steer the ship. We're going to that huge frat party on Isla de Muerta."
"Oh, whatever will I wear?" Elizabeth wonders.
"You can borrow my-" her father starts to offer. She runs away screaming before he can finish. "Well, maybe I can wear it myself now. Those college boys, they're just so much fun."
"Ewwww!" Jack says, making a disgusted face.
The entire rest of the crew looks confused.
End Chapter 10
Yes, I know. It's a terrible ending to a chapter. But that's where it ends. Only like three more chapters at the most, so I'm getting close to done! Yaeee!
Thanks, reviewers! I loves you!!! Muchly. Review again, I'll love you even more!
The Interceptor crew is all tied up in a loose kind of way so they can easily escape but they can't take over the Pearl because *its* crew can't die and they're out in the middle of the ocean so abandoning ship isn't a good idea so they don't, escape that is. (A/N: Like my run-on?)
Jack is standing in the middle of the Black Pearl crew warily, but still looking very sexy.
"Blow it up," Barbossa orders.
As Elizabeth "frees" herself, the Interceptor suddenly explodes, and she goes, "Oh, no, Will! He's too hot to die." She swipes at Barbossa in retaliation.
"Catfight!" Pintel yells.
Elizabeth and Barbossa have a catfight, and Barbossa wins. "Come here, Elizabeth!" he calls.
"I'm right here," Elizabeth replies, confused.
"No, not you, we named the monkey Elizabeth." To prove his point, the monkey jumps up onto his shoulder.
"I thought you had named the monkey Jack," Jack (Sparrow) protests.
"Well, the monkey has a lot of names," Barbossa replies, shrugging. He turns back to Elizabeth (Swann/Turner) "Well, while you're here, we might as well molest you." He pushes her into a pile of pirates, who start to do just that.
Will somehow coincidentally jumps up on the rail at that moment, picks up Jack's gun, and points it at Barbossa. "Hey! Only *I* get to do that to Elizabeth."
"What the hell are you doing? We can't die, so there's really no point to shooting us."
"Don't do anything stupid," Jack says quietly.
"You can't die," Will says suddenly. "But I can. If you don't let her go I'll pull the trigger. I will! What, you don't believe me?"
"Like that," Jack says, using Will's most recent outburst as an example.
"Will, don't!" Elizabeth shouts.
"Shut up," Barbossa says. "As for you, unless you can give me a good reason why I don't want you to die, I could really care less about what you do. So please, continue with the failing heroic suicide."
"My name is Will Turner. My father was Willy Turner, also known as…" Will lists all the names. "And either you set Elizabeth free, or I'll shoot myself and then you'll *never* be able to break the curse."
"Okay then, name your terms, and we'll give them to you as long as you hand yourself over quietly. Besides the part about Elizabeth, we know that one already."
Will taps his chin. "Well, I suppose I should help someone out. There's probably something useful I could do. Um, the crew is safe, and you name the monkey after me."
"But the monkey's already named Jack!"
"And Elizabeth."
"Well, one more name can't hurt," Barbossa says. "Agreed."
Cut to scene where Elizabeth is walking the plank. "Damn pirates," Will mutters. "I knew I should have thought the negotiation thing through."
Will and Elizabeth exchange meaningful looks for what seems like an hour. Finally, when the pirates are just too bored, they activate the plank-tripwire, and Elizabeth falls into the water, screaming. "Eek!"
"Damn. And she was just starting to let me touch her womanly parts." Will decides to sulk for the rest of the movie until the end with the giant hat.
"Okay, your turn now, Jack."
"I should get my gun at least."
"Yes, I suppose. Where be Jack's pistol?"
"How about two?"
"Um, no." Barbossa throws Jack's pistol overboard, and Jack dives after it.
A few minutes later, Elizabeth and Jack have both washed up on the shore of a deserted island. Except that there was never anyone there, so really "deserted" isn't the right word. Perhaps "empty", or-
Pirates: "Oh, get on with it!"
Ahem yes. Well, Elizabeth is quite happy to see Jack, of course. (Because he's hot.)
While Jack looks for the rumrunners' stash, Elizabeth follows him around, asking him how to get off the island. What she means, however, is just how he gets off. She just does not want to be too obvious.
"How did you get off last time?" she asks, winking.
"Last time…last time I was here for three days, and when the rumrunners came by I hitched a ride," he confessed. "Wouldn't count on that happening again, though. Looks like this stuff has been here for years."
"So," Elizabeth repeats slowly. "You spent three days lying on a beach drinking rum? That's the secret adventure of Captain Jack Sparrow?"
"Welcome to the Caribbean, love," Jack says, handing her a bottle.
"Sweet," Elizabeth says, and goes after Jack.
By much later that night, a lot of the rum has disappeared into their mouths. They have a bonfire going, and they're singing a song with really, really bad lyrics. For the rest of this particular scene, the authoress has decided to give some of the readers a treat, and instead of Elizabeth, there is reader-in-love-with-Jack-as-Elizabeth.
"Devils and black sheep and really bad eggs, drink up me hearties yo ho! Yo ho, yo ho a pirate's life for me!" They fall over, laughing.
"That's a great song! Really bad eggs! And when I'm captain of the Pearl again, I'll teach it to the crew, and we'll sing it all the time." Apparently, he wanted this crew to hate him.
"And you will be positively the sexiest man in the Spanish Main."
"Not just the Spanish Main, love. The entire ocean. The entire world."
"It must be terrible for you, Jack. Being stuck here again, I mean." She leans a little closer.
"Well, it's improved a little. The scenery is better, and the company is obviously much, much better, this time, I actually have-"
"Mister Sparrow!" Reader-in-love-with-Jack-as-Elizabeth exclaims, having a naughty idea. "I'm not sure you're quite nude enough for me to allow that kind of talk."
"Ah. I see your point." He strips down to nothing. "Savvy?"
"Much. Okay, continue."
"You see, what a ship is, what the Black Pearl, really is…"
"Wanna fuck?" Reader-in-love-with-Jack-as-Elizabeth asks.
"Do you even have to ask?"
The next morning, Elizabeth and Jack are smoking their cigars or cigarettes or tree branches or whatever they're smoking. All of a sudden they see a ship approaching the island.
"It's the Dauntless! Wow, I can't believe that idiot actually managed to find me," Elizabeth says. "We should get dressed before they arrive. Otherwise my father might offer me his jacket." She shudders at the thought of wearing a blue and green plaid jacket with large white polka dots on the lapels.
Everyone sighs as Jack pulls up his pants. (A/N: Darn.)
So when they finally get on board the Dauntless, and Elizabeth has been given a soldier's uniform to wear, though they probably didn't even have them in her size, she pitches her rescue mission to Norrington.
"Nope. Sorry, we're taking you right home."
"But we have to save Will!"
"Nope. We don't. Anyway, he decided to become a pirate when he stole a ship and all that stuff."
"Commandeered," Jack corrects.
"Please."
"Only if you marry me."
"Yuck! *Sigh* Well, if it's the only way, then okay, I will marry you."
"Yes, I love weddings! Drinks all around!"
"Mister Sparrow-"
"Captain Sparrow, if you don't mind, Commodore."
"Uh, sure. Go steer the ship. We're going to that huge frat party on Isla de Muerta."
"Oh, whatever will I wear?" Elizabeth wonders.
"You can borrow my-" her father starts to offer. She runs away screaming before he can finish. "Well, maybe I can wear it myself now. Those college boys, they're just so much fun."
"Ewwww!" Jack says, making a disgusted face.
The entire rest of the crew looks confused.
End Chapter 10
Yes, I know. It's a terrible ending to a chapter. But that's where it ends. Only like three more chapters at the most, so I'm getting close to done! Yaeee!
Thanks, reviewers! I loves you!!! Muchly. Review again, I'll love you even more!