Babysitting the Player Killer

By Dr@gon Princess

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Hello! I'm in a crappy mood because my friends are fighting and demanding request drawings, but oh well. Remember that cliffhanger at the end of Chapter 4? I bet everyone over 12 was able to figure out what happened. This isn't the last chapter, but there will be one more after this. I had it planned out like this from the start… Hope this chapter doesn't suck!

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5. Bedtime at 8:30!

            Mimiru's jaw dropped open at what she saw.

            "They're killing each other!" A20 yelled. She ran around in circles, panicking and waving her arms. "They're eating each others faces!"

            Subaru and Tsukasa stopped kissing long enough to realize that Mimiru just MIGHT have caught them.

            "Tsukasa… uh…" Subaru stuttered.

            "I had some food on my mouth," said Tsukasa quickly. "Subaru was just getting the food off my mouth!"

            "Do you realize how stupid that sounded?" Subaru said, and then added, "baby."

            "You called me baby!" said Tsukasa, blushing. "Does that mean you want to be my… girlfriend?"

            "Do you want me to?" asked Subaru.

            "YES!" Tsukasa said. They hugged. (Okay, I'll stop with the corny romance!) Mimiru just stared at them.

            "If Tsukasa had food on her mouth," Mimiru started, "… YOU GOT A SNACK WITHOUT ME?" Mimiru thought for a second. "Wait… who uses their mouth to get food off of someone's face?"

            "Uh, Mimiru?" said A20. "They were trying to kill each other! They were trying to eat each other's faces! Unless they were doing that kissing thing that Sora showed me…" A20 left, perhaps to think it over, but more likely to party and break her boyfriend's possessions.

            "I'll forgive you for getting a snack without me," said Mimiru. Tsukasa and Subaru breathed a sigh of relief.

            "We need to stop these chibis," said Tsukasa.

            "And get them out of the house," said Subaru. "They're having a break-Sora's-stuff party!" Just then, Mimiru decided that a random comment might help.

            "My parents had a party once!" she said randomly. "But, it was an educational TV party, so nobody showed up."

            "Wow, that's got to be the most helpful random sentence ever," said Tsukasa.

            "WE'RE SHOWING A DOCUMENTARY!" yelled Subaru.

            "CHOCK FULL O' EDUCATION!" added Mimiru. Suddenly, the screams of chibis were heard as the kids ran out the door. Some of the stupider ones ran full-speed into the wall, but they got back up and ran outside. "They don't like documentaries?" said Mimiru sadly. Another chibi voice came from upstairs.

            "I'll stay with you! I am a loyal girlfriend!" Great. A20 wasn't as easy to get rid of as the sitters had thought.

            "I'll go after Sora," said Tsukasa. "You can distract A20, Mimiru. Honey, you can help me capture Sora."

            "But you just told me to distract A20!" said Mimiru, thinking Tsukasa meant HER when Tsukasa said 'honey'.

            "SUBARU, you can help me capture Sora," said an annoyed Tsukasa. It wasn't Tsukasa's fault that Mimiru was oblivious to just about everything.

They had come to follow the plan without hurting themselves. Don't ask me how.

            "Hey, A20!" said Mimiru.

            "What?" asked the perky chibi.

            "Let's hang out conveniently away from the others!" replied Mimiru.

            "Okay!" said A20. Apparently, Mimiru wasn't the only oblivious one.  A20 and Mimiru stepped aside as Sora ran by chasing Tsukasa. Maybe the plan wasn't going so well after all… "So what do you want to talk about?"

            "Uh, how's your love life?" asked Mimiru, even though 9-year-olds don't have love lives.

            "Great!" said A20. "So, are you going out with that Tsukasa person?"

            "I don't know," said Mimiru. "Tsukasa and Subaru went for a snack without me."

            "It kinda looked like they were kissing," said A20. Something went off in Mimiru's head, and suddenly, she knew what was going on.

            "Oh my god, they're in love with each other!" said Mimiru. "Not just teenage fling love! True love! Soul-mate love! Share-the-paopu-fruit-and-live-happily-ever-after love!"

            "Let's get revenge!" said A20.

            "YEAH!" replied Mimiru, stars in her eyes. "First, we're going to put some tacks on the floor! Tsukasa will step on them, and Subaru's chair will get a flat tire!"

            "Then, Tsukasa is going to have to carry her around, and Tsukasa's back is gonna break!" A20 said.

            "Which will make a catapult pop up and throw them into…"

            "One of those electric shocky things! I can have Sora build it for you!

            The minutes ticked by.

            Subaru came out of Sora's room, just as Sora chased Tsukasa in. Subaru was pushed back in, and Sora shut the door.

            "I've tortured you all day, but now, I'm finally going to kill you!" said Sora, and laughed evilly. "That's what Player Killers do, you know? Here's my new death machine." He pointed to a very complicated machine that looked sharp, painful, and/or deadly. It was also very hideous.

            "You're going to put us in that… thing?" asked Tsukasa.

            "You like it? It was based off of one of A20's revenge schemes against the guy that sent her a hate mail," Sora explained.

            "Wait!" said Subaru. "You can't put us in that machine yet!"

            "There's a perfectly good axe inside!" said Tsukasa. "Do you really want it to get all bloody?"

            "Really?" asked Sora. "Thanks! I'll make your deaths extra painful since you helped me out!" He reached into the death machine and…

            … pulled his hand out just before Subaru turned on the death machine. "Hey!" Sora yelled.

            "I'm sorry," sad Subaru, leaning towards Sora. He took a step back, into the center of a circle of rope. Tsukasa pulled the cord, and Sora went flying into the air, suspended by one leg from the ceiling.

            "Dammit!" said Sora. "Put me down, now!"

            "Okay!" said Tsukasa, and she dropped the rope. Sora fell to the floor with a thud.

            "Ow!" said Sora. He said some other words, too (probably ones with four letters), but they were drowned out by the cage that he  had dropped on the sitters, which was now falling over him.

            "Hey Sora!" said Tsukasa. "Take three steps to the right!"

            "Okay," said Sora. "You… win. I'll go to bed now."

            "I'm glad you see it our way," said Tsukasa. "Subaru, good job on the traps."

            "But I'm not brushing my teeth!" said Sora angrily. Subaru and Tsukasa left the room, knowing that Sora wouldn't try any more stunts. After all, he was faced with the Chibi Channel!"

            Mimiru and A20 were still plotting revenge on Tsukasa and Subaru when the two walked by.

            "And then," said A20, "Subaru's Pantene Pro-V hair will fall out!"

            "And Tsukasa won't love her anymore! And then Tsukasa's hair…" Mimiru suddenly noticed that they were right behind her.

            "Hey, Mimiru!" said Subaru.

            "Good job distracting A20!" said Tsukasa.         

            "What's going on?" asked A20.

            "Nothing," said Subaru. "Go home."

            "No!" said A20. "Wait, what where we talking about? I'm tired, I'm going home." And A20 ran home, probably to tell her stuffed animals about the great adventure she had.

            "Well, that's over with," said Mimiru.

            "Uh, no, it isn't," said Tsukasa.

            "Not more chibis!" screamed Mimiru.

            "Nope," said Tsukasa. "Worse. Clean up." Mimiru, Tsukasa, and Subaru looked around at the mess made by hundreds of chibis getting their party on in a big house.

            "Let's get started," said Subaru.

To be continued…