Chapter Six

Leo followed Phoebe into her room and stared at the mirror while she flopped with a sigh on the edge of her bed. "How's your head?" he asked while he gazed at her via her reflection in the mirror.

"It hurts," she replied simply, "so I guess Piper's potion hasn't kicked in yet." Curious from his odd expression, she wondered, "Something wrong?"

"Why'd you want this mirror?" he questioned while he turned to face her. "It couldn't have waited until Misty was released from the hospital?"

She inhaled sharply, "You know. Don't you."

"Know what?" he prodded.

Phoebe glared at him, "Don't play games, Leo. I've got a splitting headache and am not in the mood. What'd the Elders tell you?"

"Sorry," he contritely said before he stepped away from the mirror. He indicated to it and stated, "You opened a portal."

She hesitated a moment before she nodded. "At first I thought I was dreaming, y'know, unconscious from the blow, but, the more we talked, the more we realized it wasn't even an issue of past and future. We were actually from diff--"

"Different worlds," Leo suggested when he interrupted. "Parallel worlds where your lives are so similar but not exactly the same."

Again, she nodded and murmured, "So close that not even Piper or Paige could tell the difference."

"Wait a minute," he gasped, "you mean you stepped through the portal? You switched places?"

Phoebe stared at him in surprise. Had she just messed up and revealed too much? "Isn't that what the Elders told you?"

Leo shook his head, "All they said was that you'd found the key to a portal and --"

"A portal?" she interrupted. "There are others?"

He ignored her question and continued, "I'm supposed to help guard it and prevent any accidents until it's closed."

"Like going through the portal?" she questioned warily. "It wasn't an accident, Leo," she confessed. "We knew what we were doing."

"I can't believe this! How could you be so irresponsible?" he challenged with uncharacteristic anger. "What if something had gone wrong? Still goes wrong? And what if the portal can't be re-opened?"

"Since when are you such a pessimist?" she retorted. But she saw the disapproval reflected in his face and calmly declared, "We'll open it again. I can feel it."

"What do you mean?" Leo cautiously asked. "How long have you known about this mirror? Did you do this before?"

"I only saw the mirror for the first time this afternoon," she revealed and tried to ignore the tone of accusation in his voice. She hadn't done anything wrong. She looked at the mirror and said, "From the moment I laid eyes on it, I've been drawn to it." Phoebe focused back on him and tried to make him understand its power, something she wasn't sure she fully understood either, "I lost track of everything around me while I was with it. I never heard Misty talking to me. I didn't even see her standing behind me when I was looking right into the mirror." Suddenly, she gasped in horror, "Leo, you don't think it'sit's not demonic, is it? Misty said she was keeping it for the next owner but we assumed it was for another witch. What it it's evil? What if that's why I was drawn to it?"

"You're not evil," he patiently assured her. He was a little surprised she still seemed worried about that darker aspect of herself but then realized she wasn't his Phoebe. But what if his Phoebe still harbored those same fears. He'd thought she was past that point. He sighed and added for her benefit, "I couldn't've taken it if it was evil. The mirror is simply a tool for the right being who finds the key."

"But what is the key?" she worried. "Iwe had only been thinking while we were each looking into it. We didn't actively do anything to trigger it."

He shrugged and admitted, "I don't know how it works and the Elders didn't say. I can tell you that you have to be extremely careful not to upset the balance of either world. You each have to go back, you know that, don't you?"

"We will," she promised. "Once she'sDon't worry, Leo, we'll go back to where we belong."

He stared back at her, full of concern, "Once she's what? What is Phoebe doing?"

Phoebe sighed and didn't bother to come up with an excuse. "She's trying to save Colenot that I see it happening but I gave her the chance."

"Cole?" he uttered in disbelief. "That's impossible, Cole's been gone for months."

"Not in my world," she grumbled. She saw his shocked expression and tried to explain, "There's a gap of about three months between our realities and she figured out that he was about to --"

"Kill the innocent driver from Paige's accident," he realized. Leo pressed his fingers into his temples in an attempt to ward off the headache he was positive was coming. "This is insane," he shook his head with annoyance. "She could get herself killed dealing with him, not to mention her sisters." His eyes widened, "Not hers. Yours. Your sisters. Why'd you agree? Why'd you switch places?"

"Because," she quietly replied, "I refused to do what she wanted."

"Which was?" he hesitated, afraid to hear her answer.

"She wanted me to stop Cole from killing the --" she began.

"The driver from Paige's accident," he repeated with annoyance. "That was months ago! Cole was out of control by then. Do you have any idea what he was like, what he did?"

"Of course I do!" Phoebe snapped. "Why the hell do you think I refused?" She took a moment to calm herself and apologized, "I know what Cole's been capable of and I was willing to let him meet his end just like he did here but she insisted that talking to him would help. That he might not go ahead with his plans. I don't think it'll work and had no desire to try but she needed to."

"You're over him," he realized. "You're not looking back with regret at all."

She agreed but still complained, "I don't know why you seem so surprised. I thought she moved on. I mean, what's up with this dreamboat, Jason? You should've heard the way she warned me not to sleep with him. More like out of jealousy rather than worry about me messing up her life. And, lemme tell you, it's gonna be hard to resist him. I barely know him but I'm can't wait to see him again."

Leo thought a moment before he answered. "Jason's new and exciting to her. He's a challenge in a way and I don't think she's using him as a stepping-stone to get over Cole. I think she genuinely cares about him even if that does confuse her at times. Still, I've always sensed that Cole --"

"Is still a part of her," she acknowledged. He nodded and she continued, "I know. I saw it in her face when she realized she had a chance to save him. I heard it in her voice when she begged me to save him. And I felt it in her touch when we went through the mirror. She needs to do this, Leo, even if it's only to say goodbye."

"Even if he's not the Cole she loved?" he questioned.

"He's not even the Cole I loved," Phoebe muttered.

Leo stared at her. "I guess there really isn't any amnesia." She shook her head apologetically and he sighed, "You needed an excuse to cover the gap in time between your livesYou're just like her."

"In most waysexcept one," she reminded him.

"Cole," he nodded. Would the demon ever leave herthem alone? What if Phoebe messed up and Cole escaped back into their world? What was he going to tell Piper?

She was pretty sure she knew what fears about Cole were running through Leo now. She was tired of Cole still having this effect on everyone, especially in a world where he'd been gone for three months. "You want the truth, Leo?" she sighed. "I want Cole out of my life and I don't care how permanent it turns out to be. I can't even think about our love without feeling pain and I don't want to be reminded of it anymore. We had our chance but we blew it and now it's over. Never again."

"You sound as bitter as she did," he sympathized. "Maybe with time"

"No!" she practically shouted as she leaped up from the bed. "She thought time would help too but she's wrong. I won't become what she is in three months. I won't want Cole saved. I want him gone. Can't you understand? I will never forgive him for what he destroyed. In us. In my family. In me."

"But what if he hurts her?" Leo worried. "Or your sisters? We've both agreed he's not the same anymore."

She shook her head, "He won't. The one thing he's consistent about is that he wants me back. That's all he's talked about since he left the Wasteland and everything he does is with that goal in mind."

"You are different," Leo finally acknowledged in a non-judgmental manner. "But what if your Cole is different too? What if he reacts to her differently? Unexpectedly?"

"She gave me the clue to vanquishing him," Phoebe revealed. "If she can't get him to back off, I will. Permanently."

Before Leo could say anything, Paige burst into the room with the crystal and map in hand. "I've got it!" she excitedly announced. "I've got the demon!"

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Phoebe sat on the edge of her double's bed and watched Cole inspect the mirror. She had no doubt he believed her story. His silence from their trip to Misty's proved that well enough. "You never answered my question about the portal," she reminded him in another attempt to get him to talk. Was he more mad at her for coming or her double for leaving?

Cole heard the hesitation in her voice and knew it was his fault. Like everything else,' he thought with a mental sigh. Did she ever accept even the tiniest bit of blame?' But the thought of Phoebe sent a flash of anger through him and he demanded instead, "Whose idea was it?"

Unsure why she felt stung by his tone, she simply asked in return, "Does it matter? I'm hereand I have a demon to vanquish."

"No," he argued, "she has a demon to vanquish. Does she hate me that much that she would run away to another world and send you back in her place?"

"She has the same demon in hermy world," she calmly replied while ignoring his last question. "We were both in Misty's when we were hit from behind and both Mistys were shot."

"The key that opened the portal," he conceded.

"So you have heard of this before," she accused.

Cole dismissed her attitude with a wave of his hand, "Bedtime stories when I was a boy. Legends of demons who could cross worlds without upsetting the balance of either world."

"No legend," Phoebe muttered, "fact." She gingerly rubbed the bandage behind her ear and told him, "At first we thought we were dreaming but when we touched each other through the -- oh my God -- is this thing demonic? Is that how we did it? Misty said it belonged to a witch. What if it's really --"

Cole interrupted to stop her growing hysteria. "I didn't sense any evil from it. I checked when I first saw it."

"You can still sense evil?" she nervously wondered.

"I'll always be able to sense evil," he stated. "Isn't that one of the many things that scares you most about me?" Instead of waiting for an answer, he immediately added, "A portal like this would require a being of great strength and talent. Not necessarily one of evil."

"Then how did we do it?" she innocently wondered.

He looked back at her with surprise. "After all we've been through together, all you've been through as a Charmed One, haven't you yet realized how strong you are?"

"Is that why you picked me to break the Charmed Ones?" she snapped.

"I was wrong," he quietly told her, "and I thought I'd made that clear on more than one occasion."

He had made it clear and she felt badly for bringing it up. She didn't want to argue with him but wasn't sure why she wanted to push his buttons to start a fight. "I'm sorry," she softly apologized.

Cole wasn't sure he heard right. His Phoebe or not, her mood swings continued to confuse him. One minute she could be mad as hell at him for little or no reason at all and the next she could be as scared and vulnerable as a little girl in need of some affection. "It's okay," he said, for lack of anything else.

She shook her head and admitted, "You were right, from the beginning. I am the weak link. Prue was strong. Paige is too. And Piper, most definitely. Not me."

"How can you say that?" he questioned in disbelief. He wasn't sure which bothered him more - the fact that she made the comment or that she actually seemed to believe it.

"If I was as strong as you say," she sadly told him as she looked him in the eyes, "I'd've ignored my heart and vanquished you any number of times before"

"Before what?" he asked when she had abruptly stopped speaking. He stared intently at her and requested, "What happened to me in your world? I want details this time."

Phoebe suddenly stood but swayed when the room spun unexpectedly. "Not now," she replied in a tremulous voice. "Later."

"When? After you've gone back to your world?" he snapped. But he saw her knees begin to buckle and he quickly reached out to steady her. "Easy," he quietly suggested as he gently sat her down on the edge of the bed.

Tears stung her eyes and she couldn't meet his concerned gaze. "I'm sorry," she whispered, "I don't want to hur--"

"How'd it happen?" he insisted. He sat next to her and was relieved when she didn't push him away. He saw she was torn by his closeness and knew exactly how that felt. He was hurt and upset by her but still wanted nothing more than to throw his arms around her and hold her tight. She may not have come from his world but she was still Phoebe and he still loved her.

The room stopped spinning but Phoebe couldn't move. She was too afraid of brushing against him and not being able to resist hugging him. "Misty comes first," she quietly insisted, although she wasn't one hundred percent sure if it was for his benefit or hers. All she'd wanted was to stop him. She had done that but now, after seeing him again, talking to him again, had all these other feelings bubbling to the surface. She closed her eyes a moment and, when she opened them, asked, "When Darryl caught us at Misty's and told us about that kid that shot her, did that sound at all familiar to you? I mean the way that he was killed?"

Cole didn't answer and, instead, grabbed her shoulders and turned her toward him. "Tell me."

She was momentarily frightened by the intensity he projected but complied and spoke in a soft voice. "I told you before, I lived through your plan. You killed the driver and Paige was arrested for murder. P3 was shut down and you managed to get hold of the lease when Piper and I tried to post bail for Paige. And then you"

"Accessed the Nexus," he nodded. "So it worked."

"No, it didn't," she emphatically corrected. "You were out of your mind to think I'd willingly become evil again." She slid a bit away from him and grew more agitated. "The Nexus, Cole? How could you? How could you think that I'd follow you into evil if I'd already refused to turn evil to save you from the Wasteland? After all the crap from all your other stunts, how could you go ahead with a plan that included killing an innocent?"

"I thought --" he began.

"No, you didn't," she half-shouted as she shoved him back. "You haven't thought clearly for weeks. Months. Hell, since the Wasteland."

"I only want to be with you, the woman I love," he quietly said as he stood and turned his back to her. "To share a life with you."

"Turning me evil wasn't the way to do it," she declared.

He stood in front of the mirror and hoped to see some sort of validation for his actions. Instead, he only saw the truth in his own defeated expression. In her world, he had crossed the line he'd promised to avoid at all costs. And he had evidently paid the price. "You vanquished me," he murmured.

"No," she corrected, "I told you I vanquished the Woogyman and you survived. But then I told you that I had felt nothing in those first moments when I thought you were dead."

He stared at her reflection in the mirror and whispered in disbelief, "No."

"I felt nothing," she firmly repeated. "And for the first time, I think you actually believed me. I have relived that moment so many times in my mind but it didn't register for a long time and I think Ino, I know that at that moment I hurt you as badly as if I had vanquished you." She shook her head clear from the memory and added, "I never saw you again."

Cole stood there stunned as he absorbed her words. Suddenly, he remembered something else she had mentioned at the mausoleum. "What about that other world?" he asked in a hoarse voice.

"I've already changed enough," she refused with a shake of her head.

"Tell me," he insisted as he spun around and faced her. "I know you, Phoebe, and you wouldn't risk the unknown of the portal to stop me from killing that girl if I still existed in your world. You're not trying to change your history, you're trying to save me."

"I had to try," she whispered.

"Why?" he demanded. "You say you don't care about me and that I mean nothing to you. So why save me? You could've let history repeat itself and been rid of me once and for all. I doubt your double would complain."

"Because I loved you," she cried. "Because in spite of everything you did and everything that happened, I think I still do."

Cole watched her angrily wipe the tears from her eyes and he walked over to the nightstand and pulled a tissue from a box. He calmly handed it to her and said, "I need to know the rest."

She blew her nose and gazed up at him. "I don't know how you did it."

"Did what?" he questioned. "Did I go through the mirror?"

She thought a moment. She hadn't thought of that possibility. "I don't think so. Paige said you created it. The other world, I mean." He looked confused and she added, "You created another reality."

"That's impossible," he stated with a frown. "I don't have that kind of power."

She shrugged, "You found it somehow."

Suddenly, Cole remembered the Avatars and their offer to him. He had rejected it but he wondered if that other world had been a last ditch effort after his failure with the Nexus. Would he have gone back to them as they'd predicted? Could they have given him the power to create another world? "Go on," he requested.

"Paige got caught in your altered world," she complied. "She told us that you and I were evil and married and miserable. She said I only stayed with you to protect Piper. You were still Belthazor so she and Piper created the vanquishing potion and II was the one who threw it." She paused a moment and gazed at him, "The real world was restored when you were vanquished and everything went back to normal."

"Except I was still gone," he realized. "Even if I'd ended up back in the Wasteland, that reality was lost when the real world was restored so I was lost along with it."

"It wasn't me," she told him. She was surprised by her need for him to know that. "She wasn't me. Her experiences led her to do it, not mine. I told you I've never been strong enough to vanquish you."

"Except once," he reminded her. He regretted his words the instant he spoke them. He knew she'd had no choice that night. He'd forced her to make the choice he, deep inside, had expected her to make. He saw the pain reflected in her eyes. And yet, at the same time, a small part of him felt good to know she hurt because of what happened. And, suddenly, he realized she was wrong. It didn't mean nothing. He didn't mean nothing. When she blurted out that she thought she might still love him, she told him the truth. He reached out and pulled her up from the bed. She didn't resist and he wrapped his arms around her. He stroked her hair when she pressed her face close to his chest. "How did we get here?"

"I don't know," was her muffled response. "I thought we'd be together forever."

"I loved you, Phoebe," he told her. "I was ready to sacrifice everything for you."

"I know," she acknowledged, "but fate wouldn't allow even thatOh, Cole, I'm so sorry. I never wanted any of this to happen."

"I'm sorry, too," he replied while she cried. Suddenly, the need to find someone to blame seemed pointless. What happened had happened and neither could change their actions. "Sometimes I wonder whether there could've been any other way to deal with the Hollow."

"Before that," she hoarsely commented as she pulled back. She wiped her eyes and sniffled into her crumpled tissue. "If Belthazor hadn't've been stripped from you, you might not've been vulnerable to the HollowWe were so close to having it all but fate always came between us. I'd give anything if"

"Me too," he quietly agreed as he caressed her tear-stained cheek. "So what now?"

She covered his hand with hers and gave it a slight squeeze. She cleared her throat and said, "Now we say --"

"I got it!" Paige interrupted when she burst into the room. "What are you still doing here?" she complained to Cole.

"What is it, Paige?" Phoebe asked as she cautiously stepped between the two. "Did you get something from the crystal Darryl gave me?" Paige glared suspiciously at Cole and Phoebe told her, "Cole can help. I trust him." Both of them stared at her in surprise and she suddenly realized she meant the words that had unintentionally slipped out. "Please, Paige."

Paige warily announced, "I've got the demon."

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