Disclaimer: CLAMP's not mine, unfortunately.
Postscript: I forgot to mention, that the charries will be OOC, but not too much, and it's an AU fic. Stupid, stupid me. -___-U
~Chapter 4: Eeeyagh!~
"That's the last thing that should've happened today," snuffled Umi, still very upset with Eagle for making the soufflé collapse. "What?" snapped Eagle. "It's just a stupid soufflé." "Just a stupid soufflé?" Umi rounded on him. "Knock it off, you two," said Clef, pulling Umi away from Eagle just as Lantis did the same, except to Eagle, of course. "Really…you're worse than a cat and a dog fighting." "Yeah," said Lantis. "Somebody's got to back off." "And it might as well be me?" Eagle was appalled. "It's more gentlemanly," said Ascot. "Off the subject," interrupted Hikaru, "what's the next period?" Clef handed her his timetable; she took one look and shrieked. "Choir?" Everyone froze. "Did you just say…choir?" Umi asked, her face paling. "Yes," said Clef, "that is what she said." "Come on," said Larfarga. "Surely it can't be that bad." "It can be that bad," said Caldina, "when you're the one singing." Larfarga turned ash grey.
"Cousin, if I have to put up with another forty-five minutes of Miss Cappela's piano playing, remind me to stab myself later after this," said Umi to Clef. "Yeah, with what?" her purple-haired cousin added cynically. Eagle leaned over. "What's wrong with Miss Cappela's playing?" he asked. "You were absent last time, right?" asked Larfarga. "Yes," Eagle said. "But what's that got to do with Miss Cappela's 'horrible' playing?" "Last week, she took assembly," said Clef. "Oh the horror. Anyway, you could hardly call her playing satisfactory, I'd bet a monkey could play Beethoven's ninth symphony with its feet better than Miss Cappela playing Turkey in the Straw!" "Half the time she wasn't playing," said Fuu bitterly. "She was hitting clunkers. Hardly music, innit?" "Just as the saying goes, 'Seeing is believing', I'm going to have to hear Miss Cappela's playing myself," Eagle snorted. "Shouldn't it be, 'Hearing is believing'?" snickered Clef. "Oh, shut up." Eagle kicked the back of Clef's chair.
Wham.
The door of the music room slammed open. Everybody winced. Miss Cappela thought it absolutely necessary to do that every time to get her students' attention. On one occasion, however, her "attention-grabber" resulted in a broken nose of Sierra's; she had been standing behind the door putting up posters for last year's music festival. There had been a fairly nasty lawsuit.
Anyway, back to the matter at hand…
"Ok, class, today we're going to do piano-songs!" Miss Cappela squealed in her girlish breathy voice. Everybody groaned. The funny thing was, Miss Cappela thought it was a murmur of assent, so she whipped out her piano book, propped it up, and slapped her fat behind upon the piano chair. (Did I tell you? Miss Cappela is obese. D) Oh no, thought Clef, enter Clunkers-ville. "I should've brought ear-plugs," muttered Ferio under his breath. "All right class!" squeaked Miss Cappela, "take out your music books!" Ruffling of papers.
"What song is it, Miss Cappela?" asked Sierra in a falsely sweet voice. Somebody sniggered. Miss Cappela ignored the snigger and answered Sierra. "Turkey in the Straw, m'dear," she answered. Clef and Umi exchanged highly pained looks. Behind and beside them many of the other students did the same. Again, this went un-noticed by Miss Cappela. (Amazing how dense she actually is. Ditz.) Miss Cappela placed her stubby fingers upon the piano, and began playing. Note, note, note, clunk, note, note, clunk, clunk, clunk. When she stopped, Clef and Lantis removed their fingers from their ears. Miss Cappela swivelled around on the piano chair. "Did you all enjoy that tune, kids?" Kids? The students winced inwardly. Miss Cappela watched them eagerly, expecting an answer. Instead she got stony looks. The silence was broken by a loud, rattling snore coming from a pimply-faced boy at the end of the last row. Miss Cappela swelled like a bullfrog, and she looked fatter than before.
"Miserable old bat!!" stormed Ferio. "Just because old Pimple-face fell asleep during her lesson we all have to do extra music homework." "Crud…look at what we have to do," muttered Hikaru. She was holding Fuu's notes. "Compose a simple tune…draw a picture involving the treble clef…write this sheet of letter-music into notes…" "Notes? Oh no, I'm going to go cross-eyed," groaned Clef. "Maybe Presea can help us?" suggested Umi. "Unlikely," said Clef. "My sister hates music just as much as I do." "Makes you wonder, doesn't it?" said Eagle cynically. "Cheer up, everyone," said Fuu. "It's break after this, you know!"