Majora: How It Really Happened!
By Galaxy Girl
CHAPTER SEVEN: WOODFALL TEMPLE WOES
(Kelli's POV)
As I watched Erik and David being pushed out the door, I had problems of my own. A crowd of Deku scrubs, each one at least twice my size, were carrying me towards the cage where the monkey was being held prisoner.
"OW! Hey, get yer ugly hands off me!" I screamed, struggling against the waves of wooden soldiers.
"Put her in the cage with the monkey!" the king cried, pointing at the cage with his large scepter. "Tie her up good! We'll punish her for lying later!"
The cage door swung open with a squeak, and I was forced against a thick wooden pole. A strong willow rope was tied around me, and soon, the scrubs slammed the cage door shut and I was left hanging just below the furry white monkey.
"Your majesty, I must protest!" I said, in my most diplomatic manner, considering I wanted to tear the heads off these little smart alecks who tied me up for no reason. "I didn't do anything! Why am I being imprisoned?"
"You are a traitor to the Deku crown just like that monkey!" the king said, as though stating the obvious. "You seemed to stand up for him, so you must be an accomplice!"
"I did NOT stand up for him!" I protested. "I called for his head!"
"Ix-nay on the ead-hay!" the monkey hissed from above me.
"Well, whatever. Unless one of you coughs up my darling princess or tells us where she is, you'll both die at sunrise!"
I sighed, and peered around the cage. A pile of junk was set next to the pole, and there was a large vent shaft at the back of the cage.
"Don't even think about it," the monkey said, noticing where I was looking. "This rope is too tough to break. I've tried it,"
"How long have you been here?" I asked in as loud a whisper I could use and still be heard above the scrub's chants.
"About two days..." the monkey said sadly.
"TWO DAYS? Have they fed you?"
"Only a plate of stale Deku nuts, and I can't stand them! I wish I had some nice juicy berries right now..."
"Well, we need to think of something quick!" I said. "It's already..." I stared at a clock on the wall, not even stopping to think how weird it was that there was a clock inside a wooden electricity-deprived castle. "It's already 8:00 at night! In 10 hours, they're going to kill us!"
"I've tried telling them it wasn't my fault..." the monkey said sadly. "The princess and I are good friends! We went into the Woodfall Temple to play... she taught me the song to raise the sunken main building! And when we were in there... All these creepy things were there! Monsters! And then their master captured the princess and carried her away!"
"So what did you do?" I asked.
"I ran back here to tell the king about it, but he just threw me in jail and said that I killed his daughter, or ate her, or something like that!"
"He certainly is cranky, isn't he?"
"I thought you would have known that, being a scrub and all!"
I shook my head. I would have told him the REAL story, but I didn't think he'd believe me.
I started thinking. About Erik and David, and what they were doing. About how we got into this mess in the first place. And about my normal self. Would I live to be human again?
Suddenly, we heard rustling coming from the inside of the shaft. Seconds later, a small Deku scrub in a green hat appeared through the passage.
"AHA! They said you'd be in here!" the scrub said, facing the monkey.
"Who are you? What are you doing? Did you come to save us?" the monkey cried happily.
"I guess so... but I only expected one of you here!" the scrub pondered. "Oh yeah, those weird guys outside told me about you!"
He was pointing at me.
"Well hurry up! Cut us down!" we both said.
The scrub reached towards his face and was surrounded by a blue light.
When the blue light faded, who stood there but Link!
"YOU!" I cried. "We've been looking all over for you!"
"Shut up! Do you want them to hear?" Link asked as he pulled out a sword.
"Oh boy, when I get out of these ropes, when I get my hands on you..."
Link expertly sliced through the ropes, and I dropped to the floor of the cage.
Evidently, the scrubs were screaming so loud they didn't hear me hit. Link reached up to cut the monkey's ropes, but he was too short to reach!
"Forget it!" the monkey hissed. "You're taking too long! Here, I need to ask a favor! The only way you can save me would be to go save the princess! She's in the Woodfall Temple... you gotta play this song to get in!"
The monkey hummed a tune, and Link played it back on his Ocarina.
"That's the 'Sonata of Awakening'!" the monkey explained. "It'll raise the temple when you play it! Now, hurry up and save the princess!"
Link saluted and headed for the back shaft.
"HEY! WAIT FOR ME!" I squealed.
"SHUT UP!" Link cried, a bit too loudly. The king heard.
"WHAT? A HUMAN? Get them outta here!" he cried.
The guards opened the cage and yanked Link out. I yelped and leaped into the back shaft before they could see me.
"Get that cauldron ready! That monkey has angered me for the last time!" the king screamed.
I tiptoed all the way through the shaft, not stopping to look back once. I ended up in a large garden in the center of the palace.
Dropping to the ground silently, I suddenly heard a whistle.
"HALT! INTRUDER!"
Two Deku guards ran up to me and grabbed me by the hair... um, leaves.
"OW! OW! OW! OWWWWWW!" I yelped.
"Naughty little Deku child!" one of the guards laughed. "This garden is for Royal Scrubs ONLY!"
"OW! OW! OW, I'M SORRY! PLEASE JUST LET MY HAIR GO! OW! OW! OW!"
The guards stared at each other a moment, and they chuckled.
"'Hair'. That child has been spending too much time around humans!"
Then, the two escorted me out of the palace, and booted me out the front door.
"AND STAY OUT, YOU LITTLE DELINQUENT!"
I landed in a face plant, and it took a minute to regain my senses.
"I HATE SCRUBS!" I screamed, as I brushed myself off.
"KELLI!"
I turned to see Erik and David standing near the path that led back to the Woodfall section of the swamp.
"I'm free!" I cried, as I ran back to their sides.
"What happened?" David asked, running out of breath.
"Link cut me out! And then they threw him out of here, didn't you see him?"
"We didn't!" Erik complained. "If Clumsy here hadn't knocked me into the swamp..."
"You tripped on your own, and it was two inches of water," David said, rolling his eyes.
"We gotta find him! But wait, he said 'those two weird guys out front'! Was that you? Why didn't you ask him to change you back then?"
"Because, we couldn't just leave you here!" Erik said. "Come on Kelli, give us some credit here!"
"Look! There he is!" David cried, pointing over to a small island just to the west of where we were standing. Deku Link was preparing, to burrow into a Deku flower and fly up to a small hole in the wall.
"Oh no you don't!" I yelled, as I ran to a flower next to Erik. I leaped inside, and catapulted out, grabbing two flowers and floating over to the island.
Link had just gotten out of his flower, so I purposely steered my flowers into him and grabbed his waist.
"HEY!" he cried, as we both went crashing to the ground.
Erik and David reached the island just as Link and I had got up off the ground.
"What's wrong with you?" he screamed. "I just saved you from in there, and you try and crash land me into poison water?"
"No, that's not it!" Erik said quickly. "You're Link, right?"
He pulled off his mask and a minute later the real Link stood before us. "Yeah, whaddya want?"
"What would you say if I told you that we weren't really a scrub, a Goron, and a Zora?" I said.
"I'd say you've been burrowing in a few too many flowers lately!" he laughed.
"Think about it, stupid!" David said. "Skullkid turned you into a scrub, so why can't he turn all three of us into something else? We're Hylians, just like you!"
Link raised an eyebrow and muttered, "Yeah, sure. So Skullkid changed ya into freaks... what does that have to do with me?"
"You're the only one who can fix it!" Erik said.
"ME? Oh Goddesses, why does everything depend on ME?" he whined.
"We need you to play that one song the mask dude taught you so that we can turn human again!" David explained.
Link sat a minute and thought, and turned to Erik, the one closest to his height.
"And what is in it for me?"
"Whaddya mean? Isn't helping us enough?" I asked.
"Well, let's see here... I've healed... maybe 2 people so far? And I got masks from both cases!" he said. "Ya got anything for me?"
The three of us stared at each other, and dug stuff out of our pockets.
"Well, I got... I got a Deku nut, a green Rupee, and some lint!" I said.
"I got some pebbles, a map of Termina, and some lint," Erik replied.
"I got... lint," David said, turning the pockets of his blue Zora tunic out.
Link stared and burst out laughing. "You gotta be kidding me! No mask, no deal!"
"You cheap little jerk!" I cried. "Did YOU give the mask man a mask when he healed you?"
"I was supposed to!" Link laughed.
"Come on, PLEEEEEEASE? A poor kid is asking you!" David begged, dropping to his knees.
Link shrugged, and turned to leave.
I grabbed him by the ankles. "Come on! PLEEEEEASE? A hot 14 year old girl is asking you!"
The stubborn kid stopped and turned around. "Did you say... hot?"
"Extremely!" David commented.
"Trust me, I can barely stop the men from getting their hands on her!" Erik added.
I stomped on his foot.
"OWWWOWOWOOWOWWWW!" he yelped.
"Well..."
I made puppy eyes.
"PLEEEEEEEASE?" we all begged.
"Well, all right."
"YES!" Erik squealed, leaping up.
"Right after I save the monkey,"
David's mouth dropped. "NU UH! NOPE! You do it now!"
"No way! I got stuff to do! Wait till I finish up here, and then I'll meet you outside the Woodfall Temple. Then I'll help you,"
"Ya promise?" I said.
Link held out his hand to David. "I promise,"
They were about to shake, but Link quickly turned to Erik and shook his hand. "Sorry dude. No offense, but Zora skin freaks me out!"
David shrugged. "Freaks me out too,"
"So... where's the Woodfall Temple?" I asked.
"You can find out for yourself," Link said, stepping a few feet back and pulling out his Ocarina.
"Whaddya mean?" David demanded.
"I'll change you back for free, but ya gotta FIND the Woodfall Temple first! AAHAAHAHAHAHAAAA!" Link laughed. He quickly played a strange song, and was again surrounded by a strange light.
"Soar to Woodfall!" he cried, then he vanished.
"YOU BRAAAAT! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" Erik screamed, as the light faded.
To make a really long and really boring story short, we eventually climbed up the ledge and across a long series of platforms to a huge wooden building with a large waterfall rushing down off the top.
"The temple is up there, right?" David asked.
"I hope so," I said. "If I carried you all across those platforms for no reason, I'm going to hurt someone."
We ducked through another tunnel that led to the top of the water- er, WOOD fall. We found ourselves in a large pond-like lagoon, with various nasty-looking insects buzzing around it and a large platform off to the side. There stood a familiarly annoying little Deku scrub, with a large set of Deku pipes on his shoulders.
"There he is... HA! He thought he'd get rid of us that easily, did he?" David laughed, rubbing his hands together. "When I get my hands on him, I'll..."
"Less talkin', more walkin'!" Erik scolded, as he began to carefully walk a thin wooden plank that began the broken path towards where Link was standing.
I followed close behind him, unable to see anything except for between Erik's legs. It was not a pretty picture. David was right behind me, making a weird squishy noise as he walked.
I don't know why, but I've always had this sort of pet peeve about squishy noises... I suppose, thinking back, that right then was a very bad time to bring it up. I assure you, I regret my self-centeredness in this situation to this very day.
"Could you back away from me a little bit, David?" I asked politely.
"Why?"
"That sound you make when you walk is grossing me out."
He didn't take it as well as I'd thought. "Excuse me? Is this really the time to be whining about what sound that I make when I walk? I can't really help it, y'know!"
"Sorry, sorry! It's just this thing I have!" I shouted back.
"Both of you shut your faces," Erik snapped. "I'm trying to concentrate on not falling in and, er, DYING."
"Well I sound a lot better when I walk then you do... It's like a really squeaky tree shaking in the breeze. And I wish you'd do something about all the twigs falling out of your... whatever it is on your head!"
"WILL YOU BOTH SHUT UP ALREADY?" Erik groaned. "For Din's sake!"
"IT'S HAIR! HAIR! HAIR!" I squealed. "AND I'M VERY SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT IT!"
"Hey, hey, hey, calm down!" David retorted. "Jeez, Kelli, I didn't know you were so easily offended..."
"MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR HAS BECOME A PILE OF LEAVES GLUED TO MY HEAD!" I yelled. "MY HAIR IS MY PRIDE AND JOY! IT'S THE REASON I HAVE FOR LIVING! AND NOW IT'S ABOUT AS PRETTY AS A SHRUBBERY!"
Erik let out a loud grunt and immediately jumped up in the air- well, as best as he could for a Goron.
Just as he did, a small... well... SOMETHING came speeding down the ramp at ramming speed, with a sharp and nasty-looking horn on its head. It slipped between his airborne legs, and was heading right for us!
"GYAAAAAAH!" David and I both screamed.
I leapt into his arms and he made a flying dive over the small, angry thing, skidding to a halt a little further up the ramp and nearly sending Erik to a watery grave.
Erik stumbled, and grabbed onto me for support. "SEE WHY YOU TWO NEED TO PAY ATTENTION!"
"WHAT IS THAT THING!?" I shrieked as it did a 180 and came charging at us again.
David had pulled a face plant, and was only just starting to sit up. "I CAN'T TAKE MUCH MORE OF THIS..."
If only the poor guy knew how much more of this we'd end up taking.
Erik grabbed David by the back of his vest and lifted him up, dragging him up onto the platform that the ramp linked with the other one. I was hanging limply by my little green leaf dress from David's hands, in case you care.
The thing came speeding by just as Erik did a sidestep, sending it flying headlong into the murky water. A few seconds later, a bunch of bubbles morbidly came up from below.
The three of us were more or less calming down as we stared into the water.
"I was wondering what would happen if you fell in..." I whispered.
"Let's... try not to do that," Erik suggested.
"Erik my good man, that sounds like a very good idea," David concluded.
Suddenly, across the top of the Woodfall echoed a familiar song played on Deku pipe. The Sonata of Awakening.
The three of us whipped around just as the ground began to shake. We were just in time to see a few trees sticking out of the center of the Woodfall begin to shiver and rise...
"What's happening NOW?!" Erik gasped.
"That had better not be the Moon starting to fall again..." David murmured under his breath.
We were all proven wrong as an entire BUILDING came rising up out of the swamp water. It was built out of something that looked like a cross between wood and stone... Maybe petrified wood. Elaborate Deku artwork was carved around the sides of it, and on the north and south sides there were small entrance doors cut into the wall. Unfortunately, there didn't appear to be a way of getting in the south door, unless you were a very good jumper.
We watched in half-suspense and half-awe as Link dove down into a Deku flower on the platform and popped out, fluttering over to the north door and slipping inside.
"Well... I'll assume that that's the Woodfall Temple," I shrugged.
"HIT THE DECK!"
"What?" I mumbled, just in time to be sent flying by another one of those... whatever they weres.
I'm trying not to bore you with this story, so I'll say this: Eventually, we got inside.
We found ourselves in a wide-open room, with Deku flowered platforms every few yards that led across to a door in the south. The floor was pitch black, and we could hear something rustling about... I certainly didn't want to find out what it was.
"Why are we here, anyway?" Erik whispered to David. "Link said he'd change us back if we found the temple and waited outside!"
"You think we can trust that little library terrorist?" David scolded. "For shame, Erik. I figure he's gonna HAVE to keep his word if we follow him around... Besides, he'll probably need a little help finding the Deku Princess."
(I had told them about the conversation between the monkey, Link, and myself.)
I peered around, and shook my head. "This place doesn't look very Goron or Zora friendly."
"Come on, we've managed before!" David said proudly. "We can do it!"
Erik peeked over the edge of the platform we were standing on. "I definitely do not want to find out what's making that noise..."
"Yeah David, and I'm tired of lugging you two around on Deku flowers!" I whined.
David sat for a moment in thought, determined to think of a solution. He always prided himself on being the "leader" of our little group. Even back home at the library, David was the manager, and he always liked to have things go his way.
"Well... Okay then. I've got an idea," he stated. "Kelli, go after Link."
"HUH?!" I gasped.
Erik raised an eyebrow. "What are you talkin' about?"
"Well look around! What kind of people are carved on the walls?"
"Deku Scrubs?" Erik guessed.
"Who built the temple?"
"Deku Scrubs?"
"Whose swamp is the temple in?"
"Deku Scrubs?"
"So obviously, who is going to find it easiest to travel about in here?" David asked, eyeing me as he did.
I let out a great sigh. "Me... Because I'm a Deku Scrub..."
"Exactly!" David replied. "It'll take too long for you to drag Erik and me around here. So why don't you go alone?"
"I don't wanna go all by myself!" I protested. "This place is scary! And what if I get eaten by something and don't come back?"
"You can take care of yourself," David assured me. "You're our Sis."
"No, she's not," Erik casually reminded him with a big nudge in the side.
"Well, she's like our sister, isn't she?"
"Yeah..." Erik sighed, deciding that it was pointless to argue once David had made up his mind. "He's right, Kelli."
I let out a great groan and stepped towards the Deku flower in front of us, peering down to it with the cheer that a person about to be executed usually has.
"We'll be waiting for you right here," David said. "All you have to do is find Link and make sure he keeps his promise."
"Be careful, okay?" Erik warned. "I don't want to finish this stupid quest with any fewer people than who started it."
"Yeah Kelli, try not to trip and die," David added.
"Your encouragement comforts me greatly," I said sarcastically, diving into the flower and popping back out again.
I carefully made my way across each of the platforms, careful not to fall down onto the floor and deal with the unknown noisemakers. I finally reached the exit to the room, very carefully avoiding two giant Skulltulas who were sleeping up near the roof. Then, with one final look back at my friends, I slipped through the door.
The next room appeared to be a very large indoor lagoon, bordered by some small islands and on the second floor (where I was) some platforms with various doors leading to them. In the center of the water was a large wooden shrine with an unlit torch at the center.
I believe that it was about here when I began to panic. Looking around the room carefully, I could hear flocks of creatures hiding in the ivy that clung to the walls, and monsters waiting in the darkness of one of the doorways for some unsuspecting bystander to come strolling by. I hated to think about the giant tentacles or other freaky things that could be hiding down in the water.
And above it all was the terrible, ominous, pessimistic feeling I had that I would never find Link in here, I would never make it back to Erik and David, the three of us would never find our way back to Hyrule...
And we would never be healed from this curse.
Dreading what I would find, I followed a ramp leading down to the left, dodging a large (well, for me it was large) and nasty-looking mutant plant waiting there. A door to the left had been unlocked, and not wanting to risk running into the mutant tentacles I'd imagined in the water, I decided to take it.
At the far end of the next room (another water-filled doodad, this time with ramps and a large moving block leading to some stairs), I spotted a small scrub heading towards than exit on the second floor.
"ACK!" I shrieked, pointing at him. "STOP RIGHT THERE, YOU LITTLE BRAT!"
He stopped in his tracks and stared at me with his big yellow eyes. Then he reached up near his face and a bright blue glow surrounded him. A few seconds later, the light faded and Link stood, with one eyebrow cocked. "What are you doing here?"
"I'm looking for you!" I cried indignantly, edging my way along one of the ramps so I was standing next to him. It was a little embarrassing with him having to stare directly down to meet my eyes, what with me being older than him...
"I thought I told you guys I'd help after I saved the Deku Princess," Link said, in an annoyed tone.
"Well, I would have liked to believe you, but unfortunately, David doesn't. And he wouldn't stop whining until I followed you."
"David... he's the Goron, right?" Link queried.
"No, the Zora," I sighed.
There was a small jingling noise, and that annoying yellow fairy appeared from Link's hat. "We don't have time for this, you idiot! Tell her to go away!"
"I'VE HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH OUTTA YOU!" I shrieked viciously, throwing myself at Link and grasping desperately to squeeze that little hag until she exploded into fairy dust.
"Ladies, ladies," Link groaned, picking me up by the back of the shirt and knocking the fairy away with his other hand. "Tatl, shut up already. And you... you... whoever you are..."
"KELLI!" I yelled.
"Okay fine, Kelli. Look, I PROMISED that I'd help you! So go tell your friend to keep his pants on and wait patiently..."
That's when I lost it. "HE'S NOT WEARING PANTS, HE'S A ZORA! AND WE WILL NOT WAIT PATIENTLY, BECAUSE WE'VE ALREADY BEEN STUCK IN THESE BODIES FOR FOUR DAYS..."
"Technically one day," the fairy, Tatl retorted for the sole purpose of pissing me off. "Drama Queen."
"I'M GONNA KILL THAT FAIRY!"
"Stop it!" Link snapped to Tatl, grabbing her and stuffing her back in the hood of his hat.
He took a deep breath and turned to me, leaning down to get a better look at my face. "I'm sorry you're stuck in that body... I know what it's like. It's annoying, huh?"
"Tell her to live with it!" Tatl yelled from inside his hat. Link swatted it as a warning.
A very strange noise burst out of my snout, and some kind of sticky liquid poured out of my eyes. "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I WANNA BE A HUMAN AGAIN, PLEEEEEEASE!"
Link's eyebrows rose almost off of his face. "What are you doing?"
I couldn't seem to control myself. It appeared that all the stress had finally driven me bonkers. "I... I... I... WAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Are you... crying?" he mumbled confusedly.
"I DON'T KNOW! 'FER CRYIN' OUT LOUD, I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY BODY IS DOING! I'M A DEKU SCRUUUUUUB!"
"I think you are... That's interesting, your tears are tree sap," Link mumbled.
"WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE, A SCIENTIFIC EXPERIMENT?!"
"Hey, hey, calm down!" Link grunted, leaping away from me.
We stood there for a few minutes, as I continued making very strange squeaky noises and "sapping" all over, while Link watched me awkwardly. Inside, I was wishing that I would stop making noises and just cry normally... I didn't feel like a scrub. I still felt like a normal Hylian girl. I wished Link could see me for what I was...
Whoa, this is starting to sound like a terrible Mary-Sue. I WAS JUST TRYING TO EMPHASIZE HOW WEIRD IT IS TO FEEL NORMAL BUT LOOK LIKE A SCRUB! I SWEAR TO DIN, I DON'T HAVE A CRUSH ON LINK! I PROMISE, PROMISE, PROMISE!
So finally, Link gave me a nudge with his foot. "Okay... Here. If you stop... whatever you're doing, I'll let you follow me around for the rest of the temple."
"THANK YOU!" I cried, snagging onto his ankle.
He promptly shook me off. "STOP."
"Yes sir!" I saluted, taking off after him as he hurried up the stairs and towards a doorway that looked like cobwebs had been burned away from it recently.
And so girls, remember: BIG SOBS SINK SLOBS.
Tatl was the only light as the three of us tiptoed down a pitch-black hallway where we could hear tiny squeaks. Needless to say, I was sticking very close to Link, who was the only one of us with a sword.
"Could you please not crawl up my butt?" he asked in an annoyed tone, pushing me backwards with one foot.
"Well jeez! You're the only one here capable of defending yourself!" I argued. "Well... unless your fairy wants to sacrifice herself in the name of..."
"Bite me, Woody!" Tatl snapped.
"TATL!" Link cried in dismay.
"One more derogatory scrub insult out of your mouth and I'll toast you and dip you in chocolate, you stupid bug," I growled viciously to her.
"I doubt you could even jump high enough to catch me," Tatl snapped.
At that second, she stopped in midair and made a jingling noise. "Link!" "What?"
"I sense darkness in this corridor..."
"Wow, me too! And all I had to do was open my eyes!" I said cheerfully, and extremely sarcastically.
"I MEAN MONSTERS, YOU LITTLE IDIOT!"
There was a tiny squeak, and something with very scary glowing orange eyes appeared in the corner.
"AAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!" Tatl and I both shrieked. Link immediately drew his sword.
"What is it, Tatl?"
"It's a Black Boe!" Tatl announced. "Man, what a stupid name... They're sissies! Just whack it and it'll die!"
Link did just that. Swinging his sword around wildly, I heard it slice right through a few things and saw the bodies of the little things burning up. It was pretty cool.
I felt obliged to help, so I wiped out a few by spitting on them. That was REALLY cool. If there was one good thing about being a Deku Scrub, it was that I had "Spit O' Doom".
When the hallway was clear, we continued walking until we reached a larger room with unlit torches around it, and more ominous orange eyes peering out of the corners.
"I'll light those... kill some of those things, will ya?" Link ordered, pulling a large stick out of... nowhere.
He disappeared behind a small wall, and suddenly a torch in the center of the room burst into flames.
I was spitting like crazy, taking out as many of the little buggers as I could. Tatl was fluttering over my shoulder, mocking everything I did.
"Is that all you can do? Spit?"
"What do I look like, a warrior princess?" I snapped.
"Well, haven't you figured out how to fight in a Deku body yet?"
"Sorry, I wasn't planning on sticking around in this body long enough to DO any fighting!"
Tatl shook her head... I think. "Well, as long as you're stuck like that, you might as well figure out how to fight! Deku are fast. You can spin around and attack things, ya know."
So, to get her to shut up, I spun around towards them, sending my leafy hair flying all over. To my surprise, Boes were not spin-resistant. A whole bunch of them dropped dead.
Well, whaddya know? The little witch was good for SOMETHING.
The room became a lot brighter as Link lit up all the torches. A treasure chest mystically rose up from the ground, and he opened it up. I didn't even care what was in it.
"Okay, let's go," he murmured, pointing to a door that had become visible in the light.
The next room was scary. A bottomless-looking floor, and a whole bunch of moving platforms with Deku flowers on them. Some nasty-looking dragonflies were buzzing around in the air.
Link pulled out his Deku mask and put it on. A flash of yellow appeared, and he appeared next to me, the same size.
"Misery loves company," I sighed to him.
"You can make it across here, right?" he asked in a high-pitched Deku voice.
"I think so,"
"Well, me too. And if not, I'll meet you back in the main room."
With that, he burrowed down into a flower next to him and popped out, fluttering over to one of the moving platforms, Tatl following close behind.
"Okay... I can do it!" I told myself. I burrowed down into the flower and popped out, following Link over towards the next platform, which he had already reached and left, moving on.
I carefully lined myself up to land, and did so. It was pretty scary. Taking a deep breath, I burrowed into this one and popped out, following them.
I met with an obstacle that I was NOT prepared for.
One of those nasty dragonflies was right in my way. The end of its tail was sparking with electricity, and it looked like it was just itching to knock me out of the air and feast on me.
"Nice buggy... Nice buggy..." I whimpered as it zoomed towards me. "KEEYAH!"
It was pretty sad to watch. Abandoning my Deku flowers, I snagged onto the dragonfly like a rabid hamster on the eraser end of a pencil. It flapped its wings in terror, my extra weight stopping it from flying.
I didn't know whether to be insulted, or fearing for my life.
With that, both the dragonfly and I went plummeting down into the darkness of the floor, me screaming like a lunatic and it buzzing to try and get airborne again.
I closed my eyes and prayed that perhaps there was something soft at the end of that bottomless pit.
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
SPLAT!
A splattering of something warm, sticky and gooey covered my as I landed on something that strangely seemed to squish as I hit it.
I opened my eyes. I was lying in the center of that large shrine back in the main room.
And below me were the green, squishy remains of the dragonfly I had run into up above.
They were also covering me.
"EWWWW..." I grimaced, standing up and wiping myself off. I stared down at the large Kelli-shaped impact I'd made in its body, and tipped my non-existent hat to the brave sacrifice of the nasty icky bug thing so that I might not die.
I took a look around. There were holes in the ceiling up above. Oh... So the floor wasn't bottomless after all!
Well anyway, Link hadn't even noticed me fall. I was once again by myself.
I didn't want to try and get back up there... who knows what sort of things I'd run into if I tried to follow Link again?
I had half a mind to head back to the entrance and meet David and Erik. Erik would understand how klutzy I was... But David would no doubt yell at me and tell me to go back.
So I lay down on the center of the shrine and stared up at the ceiling to wait for Link.
A couple of thoughts crossed my mind as I sat, thinking. What would happen if we did turn back to normal? Would the curse be gone forever, or would it periodically come back, like once in a full moon? Would we be normal people again, or would the after-effects of the curse somehow mutate us?
Maybe we'd be left with strange superpowers. Perhaps David would be able to breathe underwater, or Erik would have super strength...
But what about me?
Maybe I'd be super-flammable.
Would Skull Kid be able to find us again and curse us again? It would be pretty agonizing if, on our way back to Hyrule, triumphant in our quest for the missing library book, we ended up cursed again and having to come back to Termina to look for that stupid Link.
And then, I began to think again about what would happen if we never turned back to normal. If we were stuck in Termina forever, maybe continually reliving these three days. Would the three of us stick together?
People would probably find it pretty weird if a Deku, a Goron and a Zora hung out all the time. I thought that eventually, we'd have to go our separate ways and forget about each other.
David would get along well with the Zoras. He, like Erik and me, was also a rabid Indigo-Gos fan. With his leadership attitude, he'd make a great manager. Or assistant manager. Or groupie.
Erik would probably have fun as a Goron. He was the page at the library, the guy who put all the books back on the shelves and kept them in order, and the guy who handled all the new shipments and such. Maybe the Gorons had a library that Erik could work at. And if not, maybe he could make one.
And me... I was the receptionist, who kept track of the books people checked out and when they were due. What kind of life could I find as a Deku Scrub? Maybe if I begged and pleaded, I could get a job at the Deku Palace, keeping track of something... Maybe I could be a handmaiden of the Deku Princess, if they ever found her. Or maybe I'd become a Business Scrub.
Then I had an even more disturbing thought. What if, when time reset itself again, Koume and Kotake's spell was lifted and the Spirit Consummation Curse came back in full swing?
What if we reverted fully to Scrub, Goron and Zora state, and forgot about our real lives?
I must have sat there thinking about it for a long time, because I heard a click from upstairs after about half an hour. A familiar Deku Scrub waddled down and peered at me from over the balcony. "There you are!" he squeaked.
I sat up. "Where have you been?"
"Finishing looking for the princess. Wondering if you got killed... Hey, come up here for a second," Link said, all in one breath.
"How?"
"There's a ladder over here I just made fall down."
I looked down below him, and sure enough, there was a ladder. I leaped down from the shrine and hopped across the water as quickly as I could, climbing the ladder very slowly. Link took off his mask as I arrived next to him.
"I need your help," he murmured, pointing across the room to where a small lit torch was set next to a switch.
I followed him over, ignoring the feeling I had that something was about to happen.
"See that torch? I need to get some of that flame to light an arrow on fire."
"For WHAT?" I murmured.
Link pointed at the shrine I had been standing on. "I gotta bring that shrine up by lighting the torch in the middle, but I can't make the jump over there."
"Can't you fly?" I asked, pointing to a nearby Deku flower.
"Tried it... Almost died," Link shrugged. "I'll give you a stick. I'll toss you over there real gently, and you light the stick on fire and pass it over to me."
"How will I get back?" I asked.
"Once I bring the shrine up, I'll help you back," Link said.
"You promise?"
"Well yeah!" He handed me a stick. "Go ahead... I won't do anything."
With no choice but to comply, I took the stick from him. I found it a bit disturbing that it was made of the same wood as I was. Link lifted me up very gently, and tossed me across the gap.
I landed with a little thump, and shook myself off. "Okay... Gonna light it now!"
I stuck the end of it in the flame, and it ignited. Very carefully, I stretched out to hand the stick across the gap to Link. He was stretching too, but couldn't seem to reach it.
"Come on... come on..." I mumbled.
"I'm trying!" Link mumbled back.
What happened next was, to be perfectly frank, a twist of terrible, terrible fate.
A moth that happened to be flying around the torch flew just a little bit too close to the flame. The moth burst into a very small fire, just a little bit alive enough to flutter helplessly around in a circle.
The air in the temple rushed just a little bit towards the flaming moth, knocking it out of the air where it fell, just a little bit too close to directly above my head.
It landed just a little bit too close to an especially dry leaf in my hair.
Seconds later, there was a loud WHOOSH noise, and I felt something extremely hot explode on my back. I knew it could only be one thing.
"GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I shrieked in utter terror. "I'M ON FIRE, I'M ON FIRE, I'M ON FIRE!"
Link gasped, and let the stick drop down into the swamp water below. "COME HERE, COME HERE, COME HERE!" he yelled.
Tatl burst out laughing so hard I think she almost fell over. I made a brief mental note to kill her as soon as I was extinguished.
I made a flaming, flying leap and Link snagged me out of the air. I was squirming like crazy, slapping at my flaming hair and screaming insanely. "SAVE ME, SAVE ME, SAVE ME, SAVE ME!"
Link looked around quickly, and finally decided on a course of action. "You're gonna hate me for this," he mumbled.
"TOO LATE!" I shrieked.
To my utter shock, he passed me to his left arm, his throwing arm, and chucked me towards the shrine in the center of the room like a speeding, screaming fireball.
I slammed into the torch, lighting it into a roaring fire. There was a small rumbling and the swamp water in the room faded away into a normal, blue color. The shrine rose up out of the water just as I bounced off of it and tumbled down into the water, making a little puff of smoke and a loud splash as I hit.
I remember lying dazed in the water for a moment, and finally lifting myself out and crawling over towards one of the lily pads. I lay there for a while, and when I finally regained my senses, I reached back to assess the damage.
To my absolute horror, my hair had been charred to oblivion below my shoulders. What had once been a (if I do say so myself...) gorgeous bundle of fluffy brunette hair, and then a long and bushy mat of leaves had become a short, charred, burned lump of tinder. I'd gone from waist-length, to floor-length as a scrub, to a crew-cut.
I sat up, calmly headed towards the ladder, my eyes set on the door to the north where Link and Tatl had gone. I slowly walked towards the door, stopped in front of it, and gazed up at it.
That's when I really and truly lost it.
My orange eyes lit up viciously, and I let out a maniacal shriek of "I'LL KEEEEEEEEEELL HEEEEM!"
Then I beat the door open with my head and raced in after him.
The next room, an obstacle course of Deku flowers and flame, went by in a flash. I was so overcome by rage, I seemed to reach the other side in a second. I beat that door open as well, just in time to see Link standing in a wide open room, looking around. Mysterious drumming could be heard in the distance.
Tatl was the first to see me. She jangled nervously and tapped Link on the shoulder. "Hey... You have a guest."
He turned around slowly to see me, on the verge of exploding into fury. I was shaking down to the tips of my wooden toes. I clenched my fists in anger, and let out a lunatic scream.
"I'LL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL YOU!" I barked (excuse the tree pun), launching myself at him like the aforementioned rabid hamster.
"WHOA, HEY, I PUT YOU OUT, DIDN'T I?!" Link yelled as I landed on him, trying desperately to claw him into a piece of steak.
"I'LL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL YOU!" I screeched again.
Suddenly, there was a loud pound from behind Link, and a huge silhouette with an even huge-r sword appeared, singing some kind of strange chant.
He turned around, and so did I, just in time to see a large, singing, dancing, psycho jungle-man with a huge sword dancing around at the other end of the room.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHH!" I screamed.
Link whipped out his sword and knocked me off of him. "MOVE IT!"
"IT'S ODOLWA!" Tatl cried. "AND IF YOU GET CLOSE TO THAT, YOU WILL BE KILLED?! YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!"
"But there's no other way to-" Link started to say, just before Tatl whacked him in the side of the face with her body.
"MOVE IT!"
Link and I leapt out of the way just in time to avoid a big, painful slice with a big, painful sword. The crazy jungle man just kept jumping around and hooting and howling. He was really more of a walking, dancing musical than an evil monster.
This must be the master of the monsters that the monkey was talking about...
I decided to put aside Link and my differences for now, as I backed into a corner and watched Link duking it out with the big brute. Poor kid kept getting knocked around by Odolwa's huge sword. I was amazed that he wasn't dead already!
Tatl kept screaming demands at him the whole time. Now, if I were him, at this point, I would have started going for her instead of the monster.
After a few hits had been scored on both sides, Odolwa really started acting like a weirdo. He stood at the far end of the arena, shaking it, and a bunch of nasty-looking turquoise bugs began to fall from the ceiling. I let out a little gasp of concern as they started attacking him.
"I'M COMING!" I yelled bravely, racing out into the arena.
I realize that that was probably a stupid thing to do, but what choice did I have? If Link succumbed to the monster's fury, I would most definitely be next. And if Link succumbed to the monster's fury, Erik, David and I were doomed.
Link spun around in time to see me take out a few of the bugs with spit and spins (that sounds like one of those toys that you give to preschoolers... "Sit N' Spin"? "Spit N' Spin"? ... Ah, whatever.) "What are you doing!?" he gasped. "You're gonna get killed!"
"I AM NOT!" I protested. "YOU BETTER HOPE YOU DO, THOUGH, BECAUSE WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU-"
I was cut short as I accidentally tripped and landed in a Deku flower on the floor.
I heard a little chuckle from up above, and a few screams of agony from Odolwa.
Guessing I had landed wrong, I struggled to try and escape from my flowery prison. No use. I was pretty stuck.
So anyway, I'm sorry I can't tell you really what happened the rest of the battle between Link and Odolwa, but I was kind of trying to concentrate on getting myself out.
Finally, after a bit of wiggling, I was right-side up again, and I could pop out.
I could hear loud pounding footsteps heading towards my flower. But I didn't care... I just wanted out of there. So, with no hesitation, I flung myself out of the flower...
And felt my body smack into something large and armored.
There was a loud scream, and then another one (that one was me), and the ground shook as Odolwa slammed into the ground, dead. I landed right on top of him. Then I felt a strange sort of cool flame as his body disappeared, and I smacked down into the ground below.
I sat up quickly to look for Link, just in time to see him grab something lying next to me on the ground, then speed off towards a blue portal. Once he reached the portal, he vanished into thin air before I could stop him.
I stood up to chase after him, but strangely... I lost consciousness.
I was floating. And it was very warm. I could hear a very deep voice humming a song, over and over again.
Suddenly, the voice spoke.
ONE HAS BEEN SAVED... THREE REMAIN...
Huh? Who's saved? Who are the other three?
THREE CURSED BEINGS...
Wait... what are you talking about?
THREE CURSED BEINGS MUST BE FREED FROM THEIR MASKS...
Are you talking about me? And Erik and David?!
THREE CURSED BEINGS MUST RETURN HOME...
That's us! Who are you?! How do you know about us? And WHERE AM I?!
YOU MUST RETRIEVE THE STOLEN ARTIFACT...
The library book... Yes, the library book! That's why we're here!
YOU MUST RETRIEVE IT AND FREE THE THREE CURSED ONES...
THE FATE OF THE WORLD RESTS ON THE SHOULDERS OF THE THREE.
Us three... the fate of the world?!
A blue glow was surrounding me now... The warmth was fading.
It's funny. When I opened my eyes there, in that strange dream I was having, I couldn't see anything but white.
But when I looked down at myself, I saw human hands...
DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY: 48 HOURS REMAIN
I had almost forgotten the dream when I appeared mysteriously back in the entrance room, floating down gently to the floor.
I felt very sleepy... Like I HAD been dreaming.
That's when I heard a little squeak from next to me.
I opened my eyes to see a flock of those little Black Boe things glaring back at me.
"AAAAAGGGGHHHH!"
WHACK! WHOMP! SPLAT! WHACK! WHACK!
"KELLI!" David cried as I quickly climbed up the ladder and onto the entrance platform of the temple, looking very downhearted. "You're okay! Did you find Link?"
I threw him a look of pure evil, and he shut up immediately.
Erik was standing behind me, examining what remained of my hair. "Um... Kel? What happened to your..."
"I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT," I growled. "Link split. He's not here anymore. Let's get out of here."
As we exited the temple, we were shocked to see that the top of the Woodfall had taken on a very different appearance. The water was no longer sickly purple and poisonous, but a nice clean blue. The evil bugs and... rammy things were gone.
"Hey, I guess he turned the temple back to normal," David murmured. "Well, good for him..."
"But what about the Deku Princess?" asked Erik.
"Didn't see her anywhere. I don't know," I admitted, shaking my head sadly.
"Well... We might as well get out of here and go looking for Link again," David sighed. He sounded very disappointed. I didn't know he was that set on his plan working.
At that second, we heard footsteps from the other side of the temple.
I dove down into a Deku flower and popped back up in time to see Deku Link carrying a bottle filled with something bright pink and green.
"THERE HE IS!" I cried. "HE'S HEADING BACK TOWARDS THE ENTRANCE!"
"ALL RIIIIGHT!" Erik and David both cried with glee.
I'll spare you the story of how we got back down the Woodfall, but all you need to know is that we were now racing up the bridges that led to the entrance to the Palace.
Link bowed a greeting to the two scrub guards out front, and headed right inside. We were following pretty closely.
"You (squeak) again!" one of the guards gasped. "Oh no ya don't!"
"We know better than to let you in!" the other one added. "You might as well- AAGGGH!"
That noise was Erik whacking the two out of the way with a mighty Goron punch.
"Thank you, my good man!" I bowed respectfully, and the three of us raced into the Deku throne room.
We were right in time to see the monkey hanging upside down over a boiling pot in the middle of the room. We were also in time to see Link uncorking the bottle and releasing a small Deku girl on the platform in front of the king. The princess!
She looked a lot like me, actually. She was wearing a leafy pink, red and green dress, and her leaves were long and leafy green, tied back with a cute tiara made of pink flowers.
The king gasped with joy. "OH! MY DARLING PRINCESS! YOU'RE ALL RIGHT! Oh, dear, I'm SOOO glad you're safe!"
But the princess did not seem to return his affections. She was shaking with rage and throwing him the death glare. "HFF... HFF... FOOLISH FATHER!"
And with that, she launched herself at him and attacked him like the omnipresent and aforementioned rabid hamster, bouncing up and down and attempting to rip every leaf from his body.
All of the scrubs in the room gasped in terror and stepped away.
Once her father had received a severe beating, the princess turned on them, throwing them the same vicious glare. "WHAT are you looking at?"
They all backed away in terror.
The king's hand reached up into the air aimlessly. "SWEETHEART... PLEASE GET OFF OF DADDY..."
"LET THAT MONKEY GO THIS INSTANT!" shrieked the princess.
"LET THAT MONKEY GO THIS INSTANT!" squeaked the king.
I have to admit, it gave me some vengeful pleasure seeing the princess take out her anger on her father.
Once the monkey was free and on the ground, the princess finally left her father alone with one last mighty kick, and raced over to see him. "Oh, Mr. Monkey! I'm so sorry! Father makes such rash decisions when he's worried about me!"
"It's okay, Princess!" the monkey chuckled. "I understand... But more importantly, has the temple here been returned to normal?"
"Why yes, thanks to Mr. Link here," the princess said cheerfully, nodding to Link, who was standing smugly on the other side of her. "I am truly grateful."
"So you're named Link, are you?" the monkey said. "Thank you for keeping your promise to me!"
"No problem," Link smiled.
"WHAT ABOUT US?!" screamed David, unable to hold it in anymore.
Link jumped half a mile in the air, reached up, and pulled off his Deku mask. His human form stared at the three of us nervously.
The Deku King had just gotten on his feet again, and he pointed at me. "YOU! THAT'S THE SCRUB THAT WE'D CAPTURED EARLIER AND WERE GOING TO PUNISH!"
"FATHER!" screamed the princess.
He leaped backwards in shock. "Sorry, dear!" the king shrieked meekly, ducking back down behind his podium.
The princess waddled over to the three of us, looking concerned. "Hello, there! I'm the Deku Princess... what are your names?" she asked.
"Um... your highness..." I murmured. "I'm Kelli... The Zora is David and the Goron is Erik..."
"Pleased to meet you," she smiled. "I'm sorry about my father... I hope he didn't hurt you, Kelli."
"No harm done," I smiled cheerfully, placing my hand over the back of my head to avoid letting her see my new hairdo.
The princess nodded politely. "What brings you to our kingdom?"
"HIM!" we all three shrieked at the same time, pointing at Link accusingly.
"What did he do? He's a hero!" the monkey protested.
"He's the only one who can help us!" Erik cried miserably.
"Help you how?" asked the princess.
"Your highness, all of the trouble in the temple was caused by a masked Skull Kid," David explained quickly. "He also was responsible for causing the moon to crash into Clock Town yesterday!"
I gave him a nudge in the ribs as the princess glanced at him like he was insane.
"Uh... never mind, I mean... That Skull Kid transformed us into these things!" David recovered quickly.
The princess raised an eyebrow. "I don't understand."
"We're supposed to be Hylians," I said. "And Link is the only one who can cure us, but he won't keep his promise!"
"I never said I wouldn't!" he yelled in his own defense.
"Well why don't you? You promised to once you helped the Woodfall Temple!" Erik snapped.
"Yeah, that's right!" David and I cried.
Link backed away from us. "Well, ah... why don't I... um... take care of that now?"
"THANK YOU!" the three of us yelled.
All the scrubs and the princess watched as Link walked sheepishly over to us, his Ocarina in hand. Tatl seemed to be whispering something into his ear. I eyed her suspiciously as he took his place at our sides.
"Okay..." he sighed. "This is the Song of Healing."
I glanced up at Erik. He glanced at David. David glanced at me, and all three of us let out big sighs of relief.
At last, our journey was over!
I looked down at my Deku Scrub body, and said a silent farewell.
Link closed his eyes and played a melody on the Ocarina.
A strange sort of warmth filled the room, and all of the scrubs gasped in awe.
"AAAHHHH, YOU GUUUYS! IT'S TINGLY!" Erik screeched.
"I CAN FEEL IT... I'M TURNING NORMAL..." David added.
"FINALLY!" I sobbed with joy.
Then the warmth faded, and we opened our eyes.
"Hey, where'd he go?" asked the princess.
Link was GONE. A pile of feathers on the floor was all that remained of him.
I glanced up at Erik. He glanced at David. David glanced at me, and all three of us let out tortured screams of anger.
"THAT LITTLE LIAR! THAT TRAITOROUS, BACK-STABBING..." screamed a very irate Goron.
"...I CAN'T BELIEVE WE TRUSTED HIM! IF HE CAN'T RETURN A LIBRARY BOOK ON TIME, THEN HOW DO WE TRUST HIM TO..." snarled a vicious Zora.
"I'LL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL HEEEEM!" I, an incredibly pissed off Deku Scrub announced. "FIRST HE DOES THIS TO MY HAIR, AND NOW..."
All three of us burst into tears. Even the boys weren't ashamed to let it out. It was sort of funny, actually.
David was making some kind of weird bubbling noise, and slick silver tears were sliding off of his scaly body like water off a duck's back. He was also beating his head against the wall.
Erik was howling in a strange Goron-sounding voice that resembled a siren, and throwing himself onto the ground repeatedly.
And I was "sapping" again, making that demented squeal.
The Deku princess seemed outraged. "How rude!" she cried, running over and giving me a big hug. "I'm very sorry! I can't believe that a Deku Hero like that would do that to somebody!"
"DON'T BE SORRY!" I squealed. "IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT!"
"Oh, but you followed him... Through the temple, right?" asked the monkey, hopping over near us.
"ALL THE WAY THROUGH!" Erik wailed.
The other scrubs and the king were just watching awkwardly.
"I wish we could do something to help!" the princess sighed.
"NOW WE HAVE TO FIND HIM ALL OVER AGAIN!" David yelled, still beating his head against the wall.
The princess glanced at the monkey, who appeared to be in deep thought. "Well... uh..." he murmured. "I guess... if we can't heal you, then maybe... we could help you catch up with him..."
"YES PLEASE!" the three of us yelled, stopping crying instantly.
The monkey saluted. "Okay! We swamp monkeys will help you out!"
"But before that," the princess announced, stepping towards me. "What... happened to your leaves?"
I turned bright red. "Um... well..."
David and Erik also appeared to want to know.
"... Link lit me on fire and threw me at a torch," I admitted, stretching the truth just a little.
David and Erik raised their eyebrows. "Whaaaat?"
The princess gasped. "OH HOW HORRIBLE! Your poor leaves!"
"I know... I know..." I sighed.
She shook her head sadly, and ran over to what appeared to be the Deku butler. She whispered something in his ear, and he disappeared into a back room of the palace for a moment.
He reappeared a minute later with a small bottle made of wood. He bowed down very low and presented it to me on a wooden platter.
"For the lady scrub... Dr. Deku's Leaf Restoring Formula. Makes you look several rings younger!"
"Is this for me?" I gasped, not having a clue what he meant by "rings".
"Yes, it's a present!" the princess announced. "As a thank you for helping Link to save me."
"BRAVO!" yelled the king from the corner, where he was hiding from his daughter.
I took the bottle and held it close, hardly able to wait to get my hair... er, leaves back. "Thank you, Princess..."
"You're very welcome... Father, please make a declaration that these three will be allowed in our kingdom any time!" the princess asked very nicely.
"YEAH, WHAT SHE SAID!" the king immediately shouted.
"Hey, come on!" the monkey squeaked, tugging on Erik's arm. "Let's go... I have an idea on how to help you!"
A few minutes later...
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHH!" I screeched, holding onto the back of the boat for dear life.
David was up front, steering, and Erik was in the back to make sure I didn't fly off. We were zipping through a long straightaway of clear swamp water right below Woodfall, in our little boat we'd rented from Koume. Well... the monkeys had made a few... adjustments. Who knew that swamp monkeys were so good at fixing old engines?
"THERE HE IS, DEAD AHEAD!" David cried, pointing dramatically.
Link was in a smaller boat up ahead of us, paddling with an oar. That made him look extremely pathetic compared to our little powerboat.
He turned around very slowly, and when he saw us coming, let out a terrified shriek and started paddling faster.
Erik reached back with one hand and grabbed me, and with the other hand, he snatched Link off of his tiny boat like a falcon snatching prey out of the air.
Link was dangling helplessly by the back of his tunic from Erik's thick arms. He glanced over at the three of us, who were staring at him with the look that only a troop of irate, cursed Hylians who'd had a promise to them broken could have.
"Um... yeah... about that little thing back there..." Link said, very quietly, realizing that he was in mortal peril.
"You'd better have a good explanation for that," Erik chuckled dangerously.
"I panicked!" Link giggled nervously.
"... A better one," David growled.
"OKAY, OKAY! I'LL FIX YOU NOW!" Link cried, holding up his hands. "I'm going to get my Ocarina..."
He stopped reaching for it when he felt me squirming around on his back. "THERE YOU ARE!" I cried triumphantly, ripping Tatl out of where she'd been hiding in Link's hat.
"SAVE ME!" Tatl shrieked.
"I'LL TEACH YOU TO CALL ME 'WOODY'!" I sneered maniacally.
Link pulled out his Ocarina, and still in midair, put it to his lips. "OKAY, OKAY! I'LL PLAY THE SONG IF YOU LET TATL GO!"
David swatted at my hands, and I released her, even though it was still on my agenda to kill her.
Link nodded. "OKAY... HERE I GO!"
Then, over the humming of the engine of the boat, we could hear that familiar song...
THE SONG OF TIME.
A flash of light, and we were falling through a screaming white tunnel vortex, our senses blurring over like they had at midnight on the third day... Last go-round, that is.
"WE'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, DAMN YOU! I SWEAR TO FARORE, YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, LINK!" David screamed as we all blacked out.
By Galaxy Girl
CHAPTER SEVEN: WOODFALL TEMPLE WOES
(Kelli's POV)
As I watched Erik and David being pushed out the door, I had problems of my own. A crowd of Deku scrubs, each one at least twice my size, were carrying me towards the cage where the monkey was being held prisoner.
"OW! Hey, get yer ugly hands off me!" I screamed, struggling against the waves of wooden soldiers.
"Put her in the cage with the monkey!" the king cried, pointing at the cage with his large scepter. "Tie her up good! We'll punish her for lying later!"
The cage door swung open with a squeak, and I was forced against a thick wooden pole. A strong willow rope was tied around me, and soon, the scrubs slammed the cage door shut and I was left hanging just below the furry white monkey.
"Your majesty, I must protest!" I said, in my most diplomatic manner, considering I wanted to tear the heads off these little smart alecks who tied me up for no reason. "I didn't do anything! Why am I being imprisoned?"
"You are a traitor to the Deku crown just like that monkey!" the king said, as though stating the obvious. "You seemed to stand up for him, so you must be an accomplice!"
"I did NOT stand up for him!" I protested. "I called for his head!"
"Ix-nay on the ead-hay!" the monkey hissed from above me.
"Well, whatever. Unless one of you coughs up my darling princess or tells us where she is, you'll both die at sunrise!"
I sighed, and peered around the cage. A pile of junk was set next to the pole, and there was a large vent shaft at the back of the cage.
"Don't even think about it," the monkey said, noticing where I was looking. "This rope is too tough to break. I've tried it,"
"How long have you been here?" I asked in as loud a whisper I could use and still be heard above the scrub's chants.
"About two days..." the monkey said sadly.
"TWO DAYS? Have they fed you?"
"Only a plate of stale Deku nuts, and I can't stand them! I wish I had some nice juicy berries right now..."
"Well, we need to think of something quick!" I said. "It's already..." I stared at a clock on the wall, not even stopping to think how weird it was that there was a clock inside a wooden electricity-deprived castle. "It's already 8:00 at night! In 10 hours, they're going to kill us!"
"I've tried telling them it wasn't my fault..." the monkey said sadly. "The princess and I are good friends! We went into the Woodfall Temple to play... she taught me the song to raise the sunken main building! And when we were in there... All these creepy things were there! Monsters! And then their master captured the princess and carried her away!"
"So what did you do?" I asked.
"I ran back here to tell the king about it, but he just threw me in jail and said that I killed his daughter, or ate her, or something like that!"
"He certainly is cranky, isn't he?"
"I thought you would have known that, being a scrub and all!"
I shook my head. I would have told him the REAL story, but I didn't think he'd believe me.
I started thinking. About Erik and David, and what they were doing. About how we got into this mess in the first place. And about my normal self. Would I live to be human again?
Suddenly, we heard rustling coming from the inside of the shaft. Seconds later, a small Deku scrub in a green hat appeared through the passage.
"AHA! They said you'd be in here!" the scrub said, facing the monkey.
"Who are you? What are you doing? Did you come to save us?" the monkey cried happily.
"I guess so... but I only expected one of you here!" the scrub pondered. "Oh yeah, those weird guys outside told me about you!"
He was pointing at me.
"Well hurry up! Cut us down!" we both said.
The scrub reached towards his face and was surrounded by a blue light.
When the blue light faded, who stood there but Link!
"YOU!" I cried. "We've been looking all over for you!"
"Shut up! Do you want them to hear?" Link asked as he pulled out a sword.
"Oh boy, when I get out of these ropes, when I get my hands on you..."
Link expertly sliced through the ropes, and I dropped to the floor of the cage.
Evidently, the scrubs were screaming so loud they didn't hear me hit. Link reached up to cut the monkey's ropes, but he was too short to reach!
"Forget it!" the monkey hissed. "You're taking too long! Here, I need to ask a favor! The only way you can save me would be to go save the princess! She's in the Woodfall Temple... you gotta play this song to get in!"
The monkey hummed a tune, and Link played it back on his Ocarina.
"That's the 'Sonata of Awakening'!" the monkey explained. "It'll raise the temple when you play it! Now, hurry up and save the princess!"
Link saluted and headed for the back shaft.
"HEY! WAIT FOR ME!" I squealed.
"SHUT UP!" Link cried, a bit too loudly. The king heard.
"WHAT? A HUMAN? Get them outta here!" he cried.
The guards opened the cage and yanked Link out. I yelped and leaped into the back shaft before they could see me.
"Get that cauldron ready! That monkey has angered me for the last time!" the king screamed.
I tiptoed all the way through the shaft, not stopping to look back once. I ended up in a large garden in the center of the palace.
Dropping to the ground silently, I suddenly heard a whistle.
"HALT! INTRUDER!"
Two Deku guards ran up to me and grabbed me by the hair... um, leaves.
"OW! OW! OW! OWWWWWW!" I yelped.
"Naughty little Deku child!" one of the guards laughed. "This garden is for Royal Scrubs ONLY!"
"OW! OW! OW, I'M SORRY! PLEASE JUST LET MY HAIR GO! OW! OW! OW!"
The guards stared at each other a moment, and they chuckled.
"'Hair'. That child has been spending too much time around humans!"
Then, the two escorted me out of the palace, and booted me out the front door.
"AND STAY OUT, YOU LITTLE DELINQUENT!"
I landed in a face plant, and it took a minute to regain my senses.
"I HATE SCRUBS!" I screamed, as I brushed myself off.
"KELLI!"
I turned to see Erik and David standing near the path that led back to the Woodfall section of the swamp.
"I'm free!" I cried, as I ran back to their sides.
"What happened?" David asked, running out of breath.
"Link cut me out! And then they threw him out of here, didn't you see him?"
"We didn't!" Erik complained. "If Clumsy here hadn't knocked me into the swamp..."
"You tripped on your own, and it was two inches of water," David said, rolling his eyes.
"We gotta find him! But wait, he said 'those two weird guys out front'! Was that you? Why didn't you ask him to change you back then?"
"Because, we couldn't just leave you here!" Erik said. "Come on Kelli, give us some credit here!"
"Look! There he is!" David cried, pointing over to a small island just to the west of where we were standing. Deku Link was preparing, to burrow into a Deku flower and fly up to a small hole in the wall.
"Oh no you don't!" I yelled, as I ran to a flower next to Erik. I leaped inside, and catapulted out, grabbing two flowers and floating over to the island.
Link had just gotten out of his flower, so I purposely steered my flowers into him and grabbed his waist.
"HEY!" he cried, as we both went crashing to the ground.
Erik and David reached the island just as Link and I had got up off the ground.
"What's wrong with you?" he screamed. "I just saved you from in there, and you try and crash land me into poison water?"
"No, that's not it!" Erik said quickly. "You're Link, right?"
He pulled off his mask and a minute later the real Link stood before us. "Yeah, whaddya want?"
"What would you say if I told you that we weren't really a scrub, a Goron, and a Zora?" I said.
"I'd say you've been burrowing in a few too many flowers lately!" he laughed.
"Think about it, stupid!" David said. "Skullkid turned you into a scrub, so why can't he turn all three of us into something else? We're Hylians, just like you!"
Link raised an eyebrow and muttered, "Yeah, sure. So Skullkid changed ya into freaks... what does that have to do with me?"
"You're the only one who can fix it!" Erik said.
"ME? Oh Goddesses, why does everything depend on ME?" he whined.
"We need you to play that one song the mask dude taught you so that we can turn human again!" David explained.
Link sat a minute and thought, and turned to Erik, the one closest to his height.
"And what is in it for me?"
"Whaddya mean? Isn't helping us enough?" I asked.
"Well, let's see here... I've healed... maybe 2 people so far? And I got masks from both cases!" he said. "Ya got anything for me?"
The three of us stared at each other, and dug stuff out of our pockets.
"Well, I got... I got a Deku nut, a green Rupee, and some lint!" I said.
"I got some pebbles, a map of Termina, and some lint," Erik replied.
"I got... lint," David said, turning the pockets of his blue Zora tunic out.
Link stared and burst out laughing. "You gotta be kidding me! No mask, no deal!"
"You cheap little jerk!" I cried. "Did YOU give the mask man a mask when he healed you?"
"I was supposed to!" Link laughed.
"Come on, PLEEEEEEASE? A poor kid is asking you!" David begged, dropping to his knees.
Link shrugged, and turned to leave.
I grabbed him by the ankles. "Come on! PLEEEEEASE? A hot 14 year old girl is asking you!"
The stubborn kid stopped and turned around. "Did you say... hot?"
"Extremely!" David commented.
"Trust me, I can barely stop the men from getting their hands on her!" Erik added.
I stomped on his foot.
"OWWWOWOWOOWOWWWW!" he yelped.
"Well..."
I made puppy eyes.
"PLEEEEEEEASE?" we all begged.
"Well, all right."
"YES!" Erik squealed, leaping up.
"Right after I save the monkey,"
David's mouth dropped. "NU UH! NOPE! You do it now!"
"No way! I got stuff to do! Wait till I finish up here, and then I'll meet you outside the Woodfall Temple. Then I'll help you,"
"Ya promise?" I said.
Link held out his hand to David. "I promise,"
They were about to shake, but Link quickly turned to Erik and shook his hand. "Sorry dude. No offense, but Zora skin freaks me out!"
David shrugged. "Freaks me out too,"
"So... where's the Woodfall Temple?" I asked.
"You can find out for yourself," Link said, stepping a few feet back and pulling out his Ocarina.
"Whaddya mean?" David demanded.
"I'll change you back for free, but ya gotta FIND the Woodfall Temple first! AAHAAHAHAHAHAAAA!" Link laughed. He quickly played a strange song, and was again surrounded by a strange light.
"Soar to Woodfall!" he cried, then he vanished.
"YOU BRAAAAT! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" Erik screamed, as the light faded.
To make a really long and really boring story short, we eventually climbed up the ledge and across a long series of platforms to a huge wooden building with a large waterfall rushing down off the top.
"The temple is up there, right?" David asked.
"I hope so," I said. "If I carried you all across those platforms for no reason, I'm going to hurt someone."
We ducked through another tunnel that led to the top of the water- er, WOOD fall. We found ourselves in a large pond-like lagoon, with various nasty-looking insects buzzing around it and a large platform off to the side. There stood a familiarly annoying little Deku scrub, with a large set of Deku pipes on his shoulders.
"There he is... HA! He thought he'd get rid of us that easily, did he?" David laughed, rubbing his hands together. "When I get my hands on him, I'll..."
"Less talkin', more walkin'!" Erik scolded, as he began to carefully walk a thin wooden plank that began the broken path towards where Link was standing.
I followed close behind him, unable to see anything except for between Erik's legs. It was not a pretty picture. David was right behind me, making a weird squishy noise as he walked.
I don't know why, but I've always had this sort of pet peeve about squishy noises... I suppose, thinking back, that right then was a very bad time to bring it up. I assure you, I regret my self-centeredness in this situation to this very day.
"Could you back away from me a little bit, David?" I asked politely.
"Why?"
"That sound you make when you walk is grossing me out."
He didn't take it as well as I'd thought. "Excuse me? Is this really the time to be whining about what sound that I make when I walk? I can't really help it, y'know!"
"Sorry, sorry! It's just this thing I have!" I shouted back.
"Both of you shut your faces," Erik snapped. "I'm trying to concentrate on not falling in and, er, DYING."
"Well I sound a lot better when I walk then you do... It's like a really squeaky tree shaking in the breeze. And I wish you'd do something about all the twigs falling out of your... whatever it is on your head!"
"WILL YOU BOTH SHUT UP ALREADY?" Erik groaned. "For Din's sake!"
"IT'S HAIR! HAIR! HAIR!" I squealed. "AND I'M VERY SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT IT!"
"Hey, hey, hey, calm down!" David retorted. "Jeez, Kelli, I didn't know you were so easily offended..."
"MY BEAUTIFUL HAIR HAS BECOME A PILE OF LEAVES GLUED TO MY HEAD!" I yelled. "MY HAIR IS MY PRIDE AND JOY! IT'S THE REASON I HAVE FOR LIVING! AND NOW IT'S ABOUT AS PRETTY AS A SHRUBBERY!"
Erik let out a loud grunt and immediately jumped up in the air- well, as best as he could for a Goron.
Just as he did, a small... well... SOMETHING came speeding down the ramp at ramming speed, with a sharp and nasty-looking horn on its head. It slipped between his airborne legs, and was heading right for us!
"GYAAAAAAH!" David and I both screamed.
I leapt into his arms and he made a flying dive over the small, angry thing, skidding to a halt a little further up the ramp and nearly sending Erik to a watery grave.
Erik stumbled, and grabbed onto me for support. "SEE WHY YOU TWO NEED TO PAY ATTENTION!"
"WHAT IS THAT THING!?" I shrieked as it did a 180 and came charging at us again.
David had pulled a face plant, and was only just starting to sit up. "I CAN'T TAKE MUCH MORE OF THIS..."
If only the poor guy knew how much more of this we'd end up taking.
Erik grabbed David by the back of his vest and lifted him up, dragging him up onto the platform that the ramp linked with the other one. I was hanging limply by my little green leaf dress from David's hands, in case you care.
The thing came speeding by just as Erik did a sidestep, sending it flying headlong into the murky water. A few seconds later, a bunch of bubbles morbidly came up from below.
The three of us were more or less calming down as we stared into the water.
"I was wondering what would happen if you fell in..." I whispered.
"Let's... try not to do that," Erik suggested.
"Erik my good man, that sounds like a very good idea," David concluded.
Suddenly, across the top of the Woodfall echoed a familiar song played on Deku pipe. The Sonata of Awakening.
The three of us whipped around just as the ground began to shake. We were just in time to see a few trees sticking out of the center of the Woodfall begin to shiver and rise...
"What's happening NOW?!" Erik gasped.
"That had better not be the Moon starting to fall again..." David murmured under his breath.
We were all proven wrong as an entire BUILDING came rising up out of the swamp water. It was built out of something that looked like a cross between wood and stone... Maybe petrified wood. Elaborate Deku artwork was carved around the sides of it, and on the north and south sides there were small entrance doors cut into the wall. Unfortunately, there didn't appear to be a way of getting in the south door, unless you were a very good jumper.
We watched in half-suspense and half-awe as Link dove down into a Deku flower on the platform and popped out, fluttering over to the north door and slipping inside.
"Well... I'll assume that that's the Woodfall Temple," I shrugged.
"HIT THE DECK!"
"What?" I mumbled, just in time to be sent flying by another one of those... whatever they weres.
I'm trying not to bore you with this story, so I'll say this: Eventually, we got inside.
We found ourselves in a wide-open room, with Deku flowered platforms every few yards that led across to a door in the south. The floor was pitch black, and we could hear something rustling about... I certainly didn't want to find out what it was.
"Why are we here, anyway?" Erik whispered to David. "Link said he'd change us back if we found the temple and waited outside!"
"You think we can trust that little library terrorist?" David scolded. "For shame, Erik. I figure he's gonna HAVE to keep his word if we follow him around... Besides, he'll probably need a little help finding the Deku Princess."
(I had told them about the conversation between the monkey, Link, and myself.)
I peered around, and shook my head. "This place doesn't look very Goron or Zora friendly."
"Come on, we've managed before!" David said proudly. "We can do it!"
Erik peeked over the edge of the platform we were standing on. "I definitely do not want to find out what's making that noise..."
"Yeah David, and I'm tired of lugging you two around on Deku flowers!" I whined.
David sat for a moment in thought, determined to think of a solution. He always prided himself on being the "leader" of our little group. Even back home at the library, David was the manager, and he always liked to have things go his way.
"Well... Okay then. I've got an idea," he stated. "Kelli, go after Link."
"HUH?!" I gasped.
Erik raised an eyebrow. "What are you talkin' about?"
"Well look around! What kind of people are carved on the walls?"
"Deku Scrubs?" Erik guessed.
"Who built the temple?"
"Deku Scrubs?"
"Whose swamp is the temple in?"
"Deku Scrubs?"
"So obviously, who is going to find it easiest to travel about in here?" David asked, eyeing me as he did.
I let out a great sigh. "Me... Because I'm a Deku Scrub..."
"Exactly!" David replied. "It'll take too long for you to drag Erik and me around here. So why don't you go alone?"
"I don't wanna go all by myself!" I protested. "This place is scary! And what if I get eaten by something and don't come back?"
"You can take care of yourself," David assured me. "You're our Sis."
"No, she's not," Erik casually reminded him with a big nudge in the side.
"Well, she's like our sister, isn't she?"
"Yeah..." Erik sighed, deciding that it was pointless to argue once David had made up his mind. "He's right, Kelli."
I let out a great groan and stepped towards the Deku flower in front of us, peering down to it with the cheer that a person about to be executed usually has.
"We'll be waiting for you right here," David said. "All you have to do is find Link and make sure he keeps his promise."
"Be careful, okay?" Erik warned. "I don't want to finish this stupid quest with any fewer people than who started it."
"Yeah Kelli, try not to trip and die," David added.
"Your encouragement comforts me greatly," I said sarcastically, diving into the flower and popping back out again.
I carefully made my way across each of the platforms, careful not to fall down onto the floor and deal with the unknown noisemakers. I finally reached the exit to the room, very carefully avoiding two giant Skulltulas who were sleeping up near the roof. Then, with one final look back at my friends, I slipped through the door.
The next room appeared to be a very large indoor lagoon, bordered by some small islands and on the second floor (where I was) some platforms with various doors leading to them. In the center of the water was a large wooden shrine with an unlit torch at the center.
I believe that it was about here when I began to panic. Looking around the room carefully, I could hear flocks of creatures hiding in the ivy that clung to the walls, and monsters waiting in the darkness of one of the doorways for some unsuspecting bystander to come strolling by. I hated to think about the giant tentacles or other freaky things that could be hiding down in the water.
And above it all was the terrible, ominous, pessimistic feeling I had that I would never find Link in here, I would never make it back to Erik and David, the three of us would never find our way back to Hyrule...
And we would never be healed from this curse.
Dreading what I would find, I followed a ramp leading down to the left, dodging a large (well, for me it was large) and nasty-looking mutant plant waiting there. A door to the left had been unlocked, and not wanting to risk running into the mutant tentacles I'd imagined in the water, I decided to take it.
At the far end of the next room (another water-filled doodad, this time with ramps and a large moving block leading to some stairs), I spotted a small scrub heading towards than exit on the second floor.
"ACK!" I shrieked, pointing at him. "STOP RIGHT THERE, YOU LITTLE BRAT!"
He stopped in his tracks and stared at me with his big yellow eyes. Then he reached up near his face and a bright blue glow surrounded him. A few seconds later, the light faded and Link stood, with one eyebrow cocked. "What are you doing here?"
"I'm looking for you!" I cried indignantly, edging my way along one of the ramps so I was standing next to him. It was a little embarrassing with him having to stare directly down to meet my eyes, what with me being older than him...
"I thought I told you guys I'd help after I saved the Deku Princess," Link said, in an annoyed tone.
"Well, I would have liked to believe you, but unfortunately, David doesn't. And he wouldn't stop whining until I followed you."
"David... he's the Goron, right?" Link queried.
"No, the Zora," I sighed.
There was a small jingling noise, and that annoying yellow fairy appeared from Link's hat. "We don't have time for this, you idiot! Tell her to go away!"
"I'VE HAD JUST ABOUT ENOUGH OUTTA YOU!" I shrieked viciously, throwing myself at Link and grasping desperately to squeeze that little hag until she exploded into fairy dust.
"Ladies, ladies," Link groaned, picking me up by the back of the shirt and knocking the fairy away with his other hand. "Tatl, shut up already. And you... you... whoever you are..."
"KELLI!" I yelled.
"Okay fine, Kelli. Look, I PROMISED that I'd help you! So go tell your friend to keep his pants on and wait patiently..."
That's when I lost it. "HE'S NOT WEARING PANTS, HE'S A ZORA! AND WE WILL NOT WAIT PATIENTLY, BECAUSE WE'VE ALREADY BEEN STUCK IN THESE BODIES FOR FOUR DAYS..."
"Technically one day," the fairy, Tatl retorted for the sole purpose of pissing me off. "Drama Queen."
"I'M GONNA KILL THAT FAIRY!"
"Stop it!" Link snapped to Tatl, grabbing her and stuffing her back in the hood of his hat.
He took a deep breath and turned to me, leaning down to get a better look at my face. "I'm sorry you're stuck in that body... I know what it's like. It's annoying, huh?"
"Tell her to live with it!" Tatl yelled from inside his hat. Link swatted it as a warning.
A very strange noise burst out of my snout, and some kind of sticky liquid poured out of my eyes. "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I WANNA BE A HUMAN AGAIN, PLEEEEEEASE!"
Link's eyebrows rose almost off of his face. "What are you doing?"
I couldn't seem to control myself. It appeared that all the stress had finally driven me bonkers. "I... I... I... WAAAAAAAAAA!"
"Are you... crying?" he mumbled confusedly.
"I DON'T KNOW! 'FER CRYIN' OUT LOUD, I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY BODY IS DOING! I'M A DEKU SCRUUUUUUB!"
"I think you are... That's interesting, your tears are tree sap," Link mumbled.
"WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE, A SCIENTIFIC EXPERIMENT?!"
"Hey, hey, calm down!" Link grunted, leaping away from me.
We stood there for a few minutes, as I continued making very strange squeaky noises and "sapping" all over, while Link watched me awkwardly. Inside, I was wishing that I would stop making noises and just cry normally... I didn't feel like a scrub. I still felt like a normal Hylian girl. I wished Link could see me for what I was...
Whoa, this is starting to sound like a terrible Mary-Sue. I WAS JUST TRYING TO EMPHASIZE HOW WEIRD IT IS TO FEEL NORMAL BUT LOOK LIKE A SCRUB! I SWEAR TO DIN, I DON'T HAVE A CRUSH ON LINK! I PROMISE, PROMISE, PROMISE!
So finally, Link gave me a nudge with his foot. "Okay... Here. If you stop... whatever you're doing, I'll let you follow me around for the rest of the temple."
"THANK YOU!" I cried, snagging onto his ankle.
He promptly shook me off. "STOP."
"Yes sir!" I saluted, taking off after him as he hurried up the stairs and towards a doorway that looked like cobwebs had been burned away from it recently.
And so girls, remember: BIG SOBS SINK SLOBS.
Tatl was the only light as the three of us tiptoed down a pitch-black hallway where we could hear tiny squeaks. Needless to say, I was sticking very close to Link, who was the only one of us with a sword.
"Could you please not crawl up my butt?" he asked in an annoyed tone, pushing me backwards with one foot.
"Well jeez! You're the only one here capable of defending yourself!" I argued. "Well... unless your fairy wants to sacrifice herself in the name of..."
"Bite me, Woody!" Tatl snapped.
"TATL!" Link cried in dismay.
"One more derogatory scrub insult out of your mouth and I'll toast you and dip you in chocolate, you stupid bug," I growled viciously to her.
"I doubt you could even jump high enough to catch me," Tatl snapped.
At that second, she stopped in midair and made a jingling noise. "Link!" "What?"
"I sense darkness in this corridor..."
"Wow, me too! And all I had to do was open my eyes!" I said cheerfully, and extremely sarcastically.
"I MEAN MONSTERS, YOU LITTLE IDIOT!"
There was a tiny squeak, and something with very scary glowing orange eyes appeared in the corner.
"AAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH!" Tatl and I both shrieked. Link immediately drew his sword.
"What is it, Tatl?"
"It's a Black Boe!" Tatl announced. "Man, what a stupid name... They're sissies! Just whack it and it'll die!"
Link did just that. Swinging his sword around wildly, I heard it slice right through a few things and saw the bodies of the little things burning up. It was pretty cool.
I felt obliged to help, so I wiped out a few by spitting on them. That was REALLY cool. If there was one good thing about being a Deku Scrub, it was that I had "Spit O' Doom".
When the hallway was clear, we continued walking until we reached a larger room with unlit torches around it, and more ominous orange eyes peering out of the corners.
"I'll light those... kill some of those things, will ya?" Link ordered, pulling a large stick out of... nowhere.
He disappeared behind a small wall, and suddenly a torch in the center of the room burst into flames.
I was spitting like crazy, taking out as many of the little buggers as I could. Tatl was fluttering over my shoulder, mocking everything I did.
"Is that all you can do? Spit?"
"What do I look like, a warrior princess?" I snapped.
"Well, haven't you figured out how to fight in a Deku body yet?"
"Sorry, I wasn't planning on sticking around in this body long enough to DO any fighting!"
Tatl shook her head... I think. "Well, as long as you're stuck like that, you might as well figure out how to fight! Deku are fast. You can spin around and attack things, ya know."
So, to get her to shut up, I spun around towards them, sending my leafy hair flying all over. To my surprise, Boes were not spin-resistant. A whole bunch of them dropped dead.
Well, whaddya know? The little witch was good for SOMETHING.
The room became a lot brighter as Link lit up all the torches. A treasure chest mystically rose up from the ground, and he opened it up. I didn't even care what was in it.
"Okay, let's go," he murmured, pointing to a door that had become visible in the light.
The next room was scary. A bottomless-looking floor, and a whole bunch of moving platforms with Deku flowers on them. Some nasty-looking dragonflies were buzzing around in the air.
Link pulled out his Deku mask and put it on. A flash of yellow appeared, and he appeared next to me, the same size.
"Misery loves company," I sighed to him.
"You can make it across here, right?" he asked in a high-pitched Deku voice.
"I think so,"
"Well, me too. And if not, I'll meet you back in the main room."
With that, he burrowed down into a flower next to him and popped out, fluttering over to one of the moving platforms, Tatl following close behind.
"Okay... I can do it!" I told myself. I burrowed down into the flower and popped out, following Link over towards the next platform, which he had already reached and left, moving on.
I carefully lined myself up to land, and did so. It was pretty scary. Taking a deep breath, I burrowed into this one and popped out, following them.
I met with an obstacle that I was NOT prepared for.
One of those nasty dragonflies was right in my way. The end of its tail was sparking with electricity, and it looked like it was just itching to knock me out of the air and feast on me.
"Nice buggy... Nice buggy..." I whimpered as it zoomed towards me. "KEEYAH!"
It was pretty sad to watch. Abandoning my Deku flowers, I snagged onto the dragonfly like a rabid hamster on the eraser end of a pencil. It flapped its wings in terror, my extra weight stopping it from flying.
I didn't know whether to be insulted, or fearing for my life.
With that, both the dragonfly and I went plummeting down into the darkness of the floor, me screaming like a lunatic and it buzzing to try and get airborne again.
I closed my eyes and prayed that perhaps there was something soft at the end of that bottomless pit.
WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
SPLAT!
A splattering of something warm, sticky and gooey covered my as I landed on something that strangely seemed to squish as I hit it.
I opened my eyes. I was lying in the center of that large shrine back in the main room.
And below me were the green, squishy remains of the dragonfly I had run into up above.
They were also covering me.
"EWWWW..." I grimaced, standing up and wiping myself off. I stared down at the large Kelli-shaped impact I'd made in its body, and tipped my non-existent hat to the brave sacrifice of the nasty icky bug thing so that I might not die.
I took a look around. There were holes in the ceiling up above. Oh... So the floor wasn't bottomless after all!
Well anyway, Link hadn't even noticed me fall. I was once again by myself.
I didn't want to try and get back up there... who knows what sort of things I'd run into if I tried to follow Link again?
I had half a mind to head back to the entrance and meet David and Erik. Erik would understand how klutzy I was... But David would no doubt yell at me and tell me to go back.
So I lay down on the center of the shrine and stared up at the ceiling to wait for Link.
A couple of thoughts crossed my mind as I sat, thinking. What would happen if we did turn back to normal? Would the curse be gone forever, or would it periodically come back, like once in a full moon? Would we be normal people again, or would the after-effects of the curse somehow mutate us?
Maybe we'd be left with strange superpowers. Perhaps David would be able to breathe underwater, or Erik would have super strength...
But what about me?
Maybe I'd be super-flammable.
Would Skull Kid be able to find us again and curse us again? It would be pretty agonizing if, on our way back to Hyrule, triumphant in our quest for the missing library book, we ended up cursed again and having to come back to Termina to look for that stupid Link.
And then, I began to think again about what would happen if we never turned back to normal. If we were stuck in Termina forever, maybe continually reliving these three days. Would the three of us stick together?
People would probably find it pretty weird if a Deku, a Goron and a Zora hung out all the time. I thought that eventually, we'd have to go our separate ways and forget about each other.
David would get along well with the Zoras. He, like Erik and me, was also a rabid Indigo-Gos fan. With his leadership attitude, he'd make a great manager. Or assistant manager. Or groupie.
Erik would probably have fun as a Goron. He was the page at the library, the guy who put all the books back on the shelves and kept them in order, and the guy who handled all the new shipments and such. Maybe the Gorons had a library that Erik could work at. And if not, maybe he could make one.
And me... I was the receptionist, who kept track of the books people checked out and when they were due. What kind of life could I find as a Deku Scrub? Maybe if I begged and pleaded, I could get a job at the Deku Palace, keeping track of something... Maybe I could be a handmaiden of the Deku Princess, if they ever found her. Or maybe I'd become a Business Scrub.
Then I had an even more disturbing thought. What if, when time reset itself again, Koume and Kotake's spell was lifted and the Spirit Consummation Curse came back in full swing?
What if we reverted fully to Scrub, Goron and Zora state, and forgot about our real lives?
I must have sat there thinking about it for a long time, because I heard a click from upstairs after about half an hour. A familiar Deku Scrub waddled down and peered at me from over the balcony. "There you are!" he squeaked.
I sat up. "Where have you been?"
"Finishing looking for the princess. Wondering if you got killed... Hey, come up here for a second," Link said, all in one breath.
"How?"
"There's a ladder over here I just made fall down."
I looked down below him, and sure enough, there was a ladder. I leaped down from the shrine and hopped across the water as quickly as I could, climbing the ladder very slowly. Link took off his mask as I arrived next to him.
"I need your help," he murmured, pointing across the room to where a small lit torch was set next to a switch.
I followed him over, ignoring the feeling I had that something was about to happen.
"See that torch? I need to get some of that flame to light an arrow on fire."
"For WHAT?" I murmured.
Link pointed at the shrine I had been standing on. "I gotta bring that shrine up by lighting the torch in the middle, but I can't make the jump over there."
"Can't you fly?" I asked, pointing to a nearby Deku flower.
"Tried it... Almost died," Link shrugged. "I'll give you a stick. I'll toss you over there real gently, and you light the stick on fire and pass it over to me."
"How will I get back?" I asked.
"Once I bring the shrine up, I'll help you back," Link said.
"You promise?"
"Well yeah!" He handed me a stick. "Go ahead... I won't do anything."
With no choice but to comply, I took the stick from him. I found it a bit disturbing that it was made of the same wood as I was. Link lifted me up very gently, and tossed me across the gap.
I landed with a little thump, and shook myself off. "Okay... Gonna light it now!"
I stuck the end of it in the flame, and it ignited. Very carefully, I stretched out to hand the stick across the gap to Link. He was stretching too, but couldn't seem to reach it.
"Come on... come on..." I mumbled.
"I'm trying!" Link mumbled back.
What happened next was, to be perfectly frank, a twist of terrible, terrible fate.
A moth that happened to be flying around the torch flew just a little bit too close to the flame. The moth burst into a very small fire, just a little bit alive enough to flutter helplessly around in a circle.
The air in the temple rushed just a little bit towards the flaming moth, knocking it out of the air where it fell, just a little bit too close to directly above my head.
It landed just a little bit too close to an especially dry leaf in my hair.
Seconds later, there was a loud WHOOSH noise, and I felt something extremely hot explode on my back. I knew it could only be one thing.
"GYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I shrieked in utter terror. "I'M ON FIRE, I'M ON FIRE, I'M ON FIRE!"
Link gasped, and let the stick drop down into the swamp water below. "COME HERE, COME HERE, COME HERE!" he yelled.
Tatl burst out laughing so hard I think she almost fell over. I made a brief mental note to kill her as soon as I was extinguished.
I made a flaming, flying leap and Link snagged me out of the air. I was squirming like crazy, slapping at my flaming hair and screaming insanely. "SAVE ME, SAVE ME, SAVE ME, SAVE ME!"
Link looked around quickly, and finally decided on a course of action. "You're gonna hate me for this," he mumbled.
"TOO LATE!" I shrieked.
To my utter shock, he passed me to his left arm, his throwing arm, and chucked me towards the shrine in the center of the room like a speeding, screaming fireball.
I slammed into the torch, lighting it into a roaring fire. There was a small rumbling and the swamp water in the room faded away into a normal, blue color. The shrine rose up out of the water just as I bounced off of it and tumbled down into the water, making a little puff of smoke and a loud splash as I hit.
I remember lying dazed in the water for a moment, and finally lifting myself out and crawling over towards one of the lily pads. I lay there for a while, and when I finally regained my senses, I reached back to assess the damage.
To my absolute horror, my hair had been charred to oblivion below my shoulders. What had once been a (if I do say so myself...) gorgeous bundle of fluffy brunette hair, and then a long and bushy mat of leaves had become a short, charred, burned lump of tinder. I'd gone from waist-length, to floor-length as a scrub, to a crew-cut.
I sat up, calmly headed towards the ladder, my eyes set on the door to the north where Link and Tatl had gone. I slowly walked towards the door, stopped in front of it, and gazed up at it.
That's when I really and truly lost it.
My orange eyes lit up viciously, and I let out a maniacal shriek of "I'LL KEEEEEEEEEELL HEEEEM!"
Then I beat the door open with my head and raced in after him.
The next room, an obstacle course of Deku flowers and flame, went by in a flash. I was so overcome by rage, I seemed to reach the other side in a second. I beat that door open as well, just in time to see Link standing in a wide open room, looking around. Mysterious drumming could be heard in the distance.
Tatl was the first to see me. She jangled nervously and tapped Link on the shoulder. "Hey... You have a guest."
He turned around slowly to see me, on the verge of exploding into fury. I was shaking down to the tips of my wooden toes. I clenched my fists in anger, and let out a lunatic scream.
"I'LL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL YOU!" I barked (excuse the tree pun), launching myself at him like the aforementioned rabid hamster.
"WHOA, HEY, I PUT YOU OUT, DIDN'T I?!" Link yelled as I landed on him, trying desperately to claw him into a piece of steak.
"I'LL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL YOU!" I screeched again.
Suddenly, there was a loud pound from behind Link, and a huge silhouette with an even huge-r sword appeared, singing some kind of strange chant.
He turned around, and so did I, just in time to see a large, singing, dancing, psycho jungle-man with a huge sword dancing around at the other end of the room.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHH!" I screamed.
Link whipped out his sword and knocked me off of him. "MOVE IT!"
"IT'S ODOLWA!" Tatl cried. "AND IF YOU GET CLOSE TO THAT, YOU WILL BE KILLED?! YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!"
"But there's no other way to-" Link started to say, just before Tatl whacked him in the side of the face with her body.
"MOVE IT!"
Link and I leapt out of the way just in time to avoid a big, painful slice with a big, painful sword. The crazy jungle man just kept jumping around and hooting and howling. He was really more of a walking, dancing musical than an evil monster.
This must be the master of the monsters that the monkey was talking about...
I decided to put aside Link and my differences for now, as I backed into a corner and watched Link duking it out with the big brute. Poor kid kept getting knocked around by Odolwa's huge sword. I was amazed that he wasn't dead already!
Tatl kept screaming demands at him the whole time. Now, if I were him, at this point, I would have started going for her instead of the monster.
After a few hits had been scored on both sides, Odolwa really started acting like a weirdo. He stood at the far end of the arena, shaking it, and a bunch of nasty-looking turquoise bugs began to fall from the ceiling. I let out a little gasp of concern as they started attacking him.
"I'M COMING!" I yelled bravely, racing out into the arena.
I realize that that was probably a stupid thing to do, but what choice did I have? If Link succumbed to the monster's fury, I would most definitely be next. And if Link succumbed to the monster's fury, Erik, David and I were doomed.
Link spun around in time to see me take out a few of the bugs with spit and spins (that sounds like one of those toys that you give to preschoolers... "Sit N' Spin"? "Spit N' Spin"? ... Ah, whatever.) "What are you doing!?" he gasped. "You're gonna get killed!"
"I AM NOT!" I protested. "YOU BETTER HOPE YOU DO, THOUGH, BECAUSE WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU-"
I was cut short as I accidentally tripped and landed in a Deku flower on the floor.
I heard a little chuckle from up above, and a few screams of agony from Odolwa.
Guessing I had landed wrong, I struggled to try and escape from my flowery prison. No use. I was pretty stuck.
So anyway, I'm sorry I can't tell you really what happened the rest of the battle between Link and Odolwa, but I was kind of trying to concentrate on getting myself out.
Finally, after a bit of wiggling, I was right-side up again, and I could pop out.
I could hear loud pounding footsteps heading towards my flower. But I didn't care... I just wanted out of there. So, with no hesitation, I flung myself out of the flower...
And felt my body smack into something large and armored.
There was a loud scream, and then another one (that one was me), and the ground shook as Odolwa slammed into the ground, dead. I landed right on top of him. Then I felt a strange sort of cool flame as his body disappeared, and I smacked down into the ground below.
I sat up quickly to look for Link, just in time to see him grab something lying next to me on the ground, then speed off towards a blue portal. Once he reached the portal, he vanished into thin air before I could stop him.
I stood up to chase after him, but strangely... I lost consciousness.
I was floating. And it was very warm. I could hear a very deep voice humming a song, over and over again.
Suddenly, the voice spoke.
ONE HAS BEEN SAVED... THREE REMAIN...
Huh? Who's saved? Who are the other three?
THREE CURSED BEINGS...
Wait... what are you talking about?
THREE CURSED BEINGS MUST BE FREED FROM THEIR MASKS...
Are you talking about me? And Erik and David?!
THREE CURSED BEINGS MUST RETURN HOME...
That's us! Who are you?! How do you know about us? And WHERE AM I?!
YOU MUST RETRIEVE THE STOLEN ARTIFACT...
The library book... Yes, the library book! That's why we're here!
YOU MUST RETRIEVE IT AND FREE THE THREE CURSED ONES...
THE FATE OF THE WORLD RESTS ON THE SHOULDERS OF THE THREE.
Us three... the fate of the world?!
A blue glow was surrounding me now... The warmth was fading.
It's funny. When I opened my eyes there, in that strange dream I was having, I couldn't see anything but white.
But when I looked down at myself, I saw human hands...
DAWN OF THE SECOND DAY: 48 HOURS REMAIN
I had almost forgotten the dream when I appeared mysteriously back in the entrance room, floating down gently to the floor.
I felt very sleepy... Like I HAD been dreaming.
That's when I heard a little squeak from next to me.
I opened my eyes to see a flock of those little Black Boe things glaring back at me.
"AAAAAGGGGHHHH!"
WHACK! WHOMP! SPLAT! WHACK! WHACK!
"KELLI!" David cried as I quickly climbed up the ladder and onto the entrance platform of the temple, looking very downhearted. "You're okay! Did you find Link?"
I threw him a look of pure evil, and he shut up immediately.
Erik was standing behind me, examining what remained of my hair. "Um... Kel? What happened to your..."
"I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT," I growled. "Link split. He's not here anymore. Let's get out of here."
As we exited the temple, we were shocked to see that the top of the Woodfall had taken on a very different appearance. The water was no longer sickly purple and poisonous, but a nice clean blue. The evil bugs and... rammy things were gone.
"Hey, I guess he turned the temple back to normal," David murmured. "Well, good for him..."
"But what about the Deku Princess?" asked Erik.
"Didn't see her anywhere. I don't know," I admitted, shaking my head sadly.
"Well... We might as well get out of here and go looking for Link again," David sighed. He sounded very disappointed. I didn't know he was that set on his plan working.
At that second, we heard footsteps from the other side of the temple.
I dove down into a Deku flower and popped back up in time to see Deku Link carrying a bottle filled with something bright pink and green.
"THERE HE IS!" I cried. "HE'S HEADING BACK TOWARDS THE ENTRANCE!"
"ALL RIIIIGHT!" Erik and David both cried with glee.
I'll spare you the story of how we got back down the Woodfall, but all you need to know is that we were now racing up the bridges that led to the entrance to the Palace.
Link bowed a greeting to the two scrub guards out front, and headed right inside. We were following pretty closely.
"You (squeak) again!" one of the guards gasped. "Oh no ya don't!"
"We know better than to let you in!" the other one added. "You might as well- AAGGGH!"
That noise was Erik whacking the two out of the way with a mighty Goron punch.
"Thank you, my good man!" I bowed respectfully, and the three of us raced into the Deku throne room.
We were right in time to see the monkey hanging upside down over a boiling pot in the middle of the room. We were also in time to see Link uncorking the bottle and releasing a small Deku girl on the platform in front of the king. The princess!
She looked a lot like me, actually. She was wearing a leafy pink, red and green dress, and her leaves were long and leafy green, tied back with a cute tiara made of pink flowers.
The king gasped with joy. "OH! MY DARLING PRINCESS! YOU'RE ALL RIGHT! Oh, dear, I'm SOOO glad you're safe!"
But the princess did not seem to return his affections. She was shaking with rage and throwing him the death glare. "HFF... HFF... FOOLISH FATHER!"
And with that, she launched herself at him and attacked him like the omnipresent and aforementioned rabid hamster, bouncing up and down and attempting to rip every leaf from his body.
All of the scrubs in the room gasped in terror and stepped away.
Once her father had received a severe beating, the princess turned on them, throwing them the same vicious glare. "WHAT are you looking at?"
They all backed away in terror.
The king's hand reached up into the air aimlessly. "SWEETHEART... PLEASE GET OFF OF DADDY..."
"LET THAT MONKEY GO THIS INSTANT!" shrieked the princess.
"LET THAT MONKEY GO THIS INSTANT!" squeaked the king.
I have to admit, it gave me some vengeful pleasure seeing the princess take out her anger on her father.
Once the monkey was free and on the ground, the princess finally left her father alone with one last mighty kick, and raced over to see him. "Oh, Mr. Monkey! I'm so sorry! Father makes such rash decisions when he's worried about me!"
"It's okay, Princess!" the monkey chuckled. "I understand... But more importantly, has the temple here been returned to normal?"
"Why yes, thanks to Mr. Link here," the princess said cheerfully, nodding to Link, who was standing smugly on the other side of her. "I am truly grateful."
"So you're named Link, are you?" the monkey said. "Thank you for keeping your promise to me!"
"No problem," Link smiled.
"WHAT ABOUT US?!" screamed David, unable to hold it in anymore.
Link jumped half a mile in the air, reached up, and pulled off his Deku mask. His human form stared at the three of us nervously.
The Deku King had just gotten on his feet again, and he pointed at me. "YOU! THAT'S THE SCRUB THAT WE'D CAPTURED EARLIER AND WERE GOING TO PUNISH!"
"FATHER!" screamed the princess.
He leaped backwards in shock. "Sorry, dear!" the king shrieked meekly, ducking back down behind his podium.
The princess waddled over to the three of us, looking concerned. "Hello, there! I'm the Deku Princess... what are your names?" she asked.
"Um... your highness..." I murmured. "I'm Kelli... The Zora is David and the Goron is Erik..."
"Pleased to meet you," she smiled. "I'm sorry about my father... I hope he didn't hurt you, Kelli."
"No harm done," I smiled cheerfully, placing my hand over the back of my head to avoid letting her see my new hairdo.
The princess nodded politely. "What brings you to our kingdom?"
"HIM!" we all three shrieked at the same time, pointing at Link accusingly.
"What did he do? He's a hero!" the monkey protested.
"He's the only one who can help us!" Erik cried miserably.
"Help you how?" asked the princess.
"Your highness, all of the trouble in the temple was caused by a masked Skull Kid," David explained quickly. "He also was responsible for causing the moon to crash into Clock Town yesterday!"
I gave him a nudge in the ribs as the princess glanced at him like he was insane.
"Uh... never mind, I mean... That Skull Kid transformed us into these things!" David recovered quickly.
The princess raised an eyebrow. "I don't understand."
"We're supposed to be Hylians," I said. "And Link is the only one who can cure us, but he won't keep his promise!"
"I never said I wouldn't!" he yelled in his own defense.
"Well why don't you? You promised to once you helped the Woodfall Temple!" Erik snapped.
"Yeah, that's right!" David and I cried.
Link backed away from us. "Well, ah... why don't I... um... take care of that now?"
"THANK YOU!" the three of us yelled.
All the scrubs and the princess watched as Link walked sheepishly over to us, his Ocarina in hand. Tatl seemed to be whispering something into his ear. I eyed her suspiciously as he took his place at our sides.
"Okay..." he sighed. "This is the Song of Healing."
I glanced up at Erik. He glanced at David. David glanced at me, and all three of us let out big sighs of relief.
At last, our journey was over!
I looked down at my Deku Scrub body, and said a silent farewell.
Link closed his eyes and played a melody on the Ocarina.
A strange sort of warmth filled the room, and all of the scrubs gasped in awe.
"AAAHHHH, YOU GUUUYS! IT'S TINGLY!" Erik screeched.
"I CAN FEEL IT... I'M TURNING NORMAL..." David added.
"FINALLY!" I sobbed with joy.
Then the warmth faded, and we opened our eyes.
"Hey, where'd he go?" asked the princess.
Link was GONE. A pile of feathers on the floor was all that remained of him.
I glanced up at Erik. He glanced at David. David glanced at me, and all three of us let out tortured screams of anger.
"THAT LITTLE LIAR! THAT TRAITOROUS, BACK-STABBING..." screamed a very irate Goron.
"...I CAN'T BELIEVE WE TRUSTED HIM! IF HE CAN'T RETURN A LIBRARY BOOK ON TIME, THEN HOW DO WE TRUST HIM TO..." snarled a vicious Zora.
"I'LL KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELL HEEEEM!" I, an incredibly pissed off Deku Scrub announced. "FIRST HE DOES THIS TO MY HAIR, AND NOW..."
All three of us burst into tears. Even the boys weren't ashamed to let it out. It was sort of funny, actually.
David was making some kind of weird bubbling noise, and slick silver tears were sliding off of his scaly body like water off a duck's back. He was also beating his head against the wall.
Erik was howling in a strange Goron-sounding voice that resembled a siren, and throwing himself onto the ground repeatedly.
And I was "sapping" again, making that demented squeal.
The Deku princess seemed outraged. "How rude!" she cried, running over and giving me a big hug. "I'm very sorry! I can't believe that a Deku Hero like that would do that to somebody!"
"DON'T BE SORRY!" I squealed. "IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT!"
"Oh, but you followed him... Through the temple, right?" asked the monkey, hopping over near us.
"ALL THE WAY THROUGH!" Erik wailed.
The other scrubs and the king were just watching awkwardly.
"I wish we could do something to help!" the princess sighed.
"NOW WE HAVE TO FIND HIM ALL OVER AGAIN!" David yelled, still beating his head against the wall.
The princess glanced at the monkey, who appeared to be in deep thought. "Well... uh..." he murmured. "I guess... if we can't heal you, then maybe... we could help you catch up with him..."
"YES PLEASE!" the three of us yelled, stopping crying instantly.
The monkey saluted. "Okay! We swamp monkeys will help you out!"
"But before that," the princess announced, stepping towards me. "What... happened to your leaves?"
I turned bright red. "Um... well..."
David and Erik also appeared to want to know.
"... Link lit me on fire and threw me at a torch," I admitted, stretching the truth just a little.
David and Erik raised their eyebrows. "Whaaaat?"
The princess gasped. "OH HOW HORRIBLE! Your poor leaves!"
"I know... I know..." I sighed.
She shook her head sadly, and ran over to what appeared to be the Deku butler. She whispered something in his ear, and he disappeared into a back room of the palace for a moment.
He reappeared a minute later with a small bottle made of wood. He bowed down very low and presented it to me on a wooden platter.
"For the lady scrub... Dr. Deku's Leaf Restoring Formula. Makes you look several rings younger!"
"Is this for me?" I gasped, not having a clue what he meant by "rings".
"Yes, it's a present!" the princess announced. "As a thank you for helping Link to save me."
"BRAVO!" yelled the king from the corner, where he was hiding from his daughter.
I took the bottle and held it close, hardly able to wait to get my hair... er, leaves back. "Thank you, Princess..."
"You're very welcome... Father, please make a declaration that these three will be allowed in our kingdom any time!" the princess asked very nicely.
"YEAH, WHAT SHE SAID!" the king immediately shouted.
"Hey, come on!" the monkey squeaked, tugging on Erik's arm. "Let's go... I have an idea on how to help you!"
A few minutes later...
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHH!" I screeched, holding onto the back of the boat for dear life.
David was up front, steering, and Erik was in the back to make sure I didn't fly off. We were zipping through a long straightaway of clear swamp water right below Woodfall, in our little boat we'd rented from Koume. Well... the monkeys had made a few... adjustments. Who knew that swamp monkeys were so good at fixing old engines?
"THERE HE IS, DEAD AHEAD!" David cried, pointing dramatically.
Link was in a smaller boat up ahead of us, paddling with an oar. That made him look extremely pathetic compared to our little powerboat.
He turned around very slowly, and when he saw us coming, let out a terrified shriek and started paddling faster.
Erik reached back with one hand and grabbed me, and with the other hand, he snatched Link off of his tiny boat like a falcon snatching prey out of the air.
Link was dangling helplessly by the back of his tunic from Erik's thick arms. He glanced over at the three of us, who were staring at him with the look that only a troop of irate, cursed Hylians who'd had a promise to them broken could have.
"Um... yeah... about that little thing back there..." Link said, very quietly, realizing that he was in mortal peril.
"You'd better have a good explanation for that," Erik chuckled dangerously.
"I panicked!" Link giggled nervously.
"... A better one," David growled.
"OKAY, OKAY! I'LL FIX YOU NOW!" Link cried, holding up his hands. "I'm going to get my Ocarina..."
He stopped reaching for it when he felt me squirming around on his back. "THERE YOU ARE!" I cried triumphantly, ripping Tatl out of where she'd been hiding in Link's hat.
"SAVE ME!" Tatl shrieked.
"I'LL TEACH YOU TO CALL ME 'WOODY'!" I sneered maniacally.
Link pulled out his Ocarina, and still in midair, put it to his lips. "OKAY, OKAY! I'LL PLAY THE SONG IF YOU LET TATL GO!"
David swatted at my hands, and I released her, even though it was still on my agenda to kill her.
Link nodded. "OKAY... HERE I GO!"
Then, over the humming of the engine of the boat, we could hear that familiar song...
THE SONG OF TIME.
A flash of light, and we were falling through a screaming white tunnel vortex, our senses blurring over like they had at midnight on the third day... Last go-round, that is.
"WE'LL GET YOU FOR THIS, DAMN YOU! I SWEAR TO FARORE, YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS, LINK!" David screamed as we all blacked out.