Thanks to you all, mucho, mucho love.
I stayed with my parents for another week or so until I got the courage to go back to our apartment. I made Trunks and Bra come with me to make sure I wasn't going to totally break down and put too much stress on myself.
They brought me home one afternoon, the both of them carrying my stuff, saying I was far too pregnant to be moving things. They helped me cook lunch and when I went past the baby's room, I noticed they had set up the crib and the changing table.
"You know how unpredictable Goten is," Trunks said cheerfully. "Who knew when he would have time to do it."
Bra laughed and added, "True. I mean, 'Ten has always been full of surprises."
It had seemed so fake. They way Trunks and Bra were talking, it sounded like Goten was just another husband away on another business trip. I knew they were trying to cheer me up, but they should have done it in a way that wasn't so-- so unreal.
Not that I was ungrateful or anything.
"Bra, do you think you could spend the night with me?" I asked quietly. "I just don't think I can spend the night alone."
"Of course I will. We'll make another night out of it. You know, like last…" Bra's voice stopped abruptly, as she remembered what happened last time.
I smiled weakly and looked down at my hands, since I could no longer see my feet. "It's okay B," I reassured. I turned so I was facing both her and Trunks. "I know you guys are trying to keep my mind off Goten and what happened, and I really appreciate it, but I'm okay. I'm never going to forget about it, although I want to. The only thing I can do now is wait. And I'd like it of you will wait with me."
Trunks nodded. "You're right Ron, we shouldn't have tried to make you forget. I only wish I could knock some sense into him. I feel so responsible for this whole mess," he said, somewhat guiltily. His eyes shifted downwards to my stomach.
"Hey guys," Bra piped up, "what are we going to do if the baby isn't Goten's? Not that I'm wishing it is, but you have to admit, it is a possibility. I don't know how I would explain it to Goten, if it was me."
"You're right. I do need a plan. What's the nurse going to say? 'Congratulations Mr. Son, she's not yours.' Do you think he'd want anything to do with me then?" I asked. I ran my hands over my belly, as if having my hands close to the baby would give me some answers.
"It's not my baby," Trunks insisted. "Trust me, I would know if it was. Listen, do you remember when I had been dating that girl Kei, and she was pregnant, and she didn't know if the baby was mine or not? Well, I knew the baby wasn't mine. With a Sayain, you just know these things. It's sort of like a sixth sense."
Does Trunks always get into these situations, you may ask yourself. The answer, sadly, is yes. Trunks is a one-night-stand-get-the-girl-pregnant-or-so-you-think type of guy.
I sat there in silence, twirling my wedding ring around my finger. I could give Goten time until the baby was born, but forever? There was no way I could just throw away our marriage like that. Okay, I know I was the one who completely
fucked things up, but still. I had thought 'Ten and I were stronger than that.
~
For the rest of February and March, I tried to piece together what I had. I prepared to give birth and have a baby around. Which mean I had to childproof the apartment, buy diapers, clothes, bottles, bibs, and toys, and plan for the actual birth day.
Mom and Bulma knew I just wasn't up for a baby shower, and so they skipped that part. I could have used one for the gifts though. Buying all that stuff myself had really taken its toll on my expenses.
Mom and Daddy decided when it was time, I'd call them and they'd come get me and drive me to the hospital. They'd call everyone when we got there and I was situated.
By the end of March, I was so big, it wasn't even funny. The clothes I had worn only a month before were too tight, and sometimes I wondered if my feet were still there. I'd waddle around, complaining to myself about how my back hurt, or how those stretch marks were going to stay there or a long time. Complaining to yourself isn't as fun as complaining to the person who got you into that position in the first place.
It was hard to wake up each morning alone, swimming in the blankets by myself, Goten's arms not wrapped around me. I missed the soft kisses he used to live on my belly each morning as I woke up.
I didn't blame or resent Goten for leaving, I was just regretful that I hadn't been honest from the start. Maybe if I had told Goten about the kiss when it happened, we could have worked things out back in July, and we either would have been anxiously waiting for the baby or preparing for our April wedding.
But maybe if I had told him about the kiss in July, he would have been mad at me back then, and I might have had to do a lot more on my own. But I guess I'll never know…
As March came and went, and April began, I thought more about that. I guess that's why condoms had been invented.
But back to April.
As I came to the startling realization that at any given moment, I could be pushing a child out of my vagina, I came to the conclusion that I knew absolutely nothing about being a mother. Sure, I had baby-sat for Bra and Pan years before, but watching a couple of ten year olds for a day and providing for a baby were completely different things.
So you wouldn't believe how scared I was in mid-April when I was standing in the kitchen and my water broke.