Disclaimer: See Chapter 1.
What a boring ceremony. It wasn't even a ceremony, really. Just a few stupid looking military men in stupid red jackets marching around with stupid rifles that had stupid machetes attached to them. Oh, the thrill. They made a tunnel like formation for the new Commodore to walk through. If you ask me, they should have shot him and then shot each other. That would have been a bit more entertaining, and Elizabeth would have fainted, if she had not already managed to do so. She was quite the nuisance with her little whimpers and gasps of pain because of the corset.
Me, being the older, wiser, and more mature one (by a minute anyway), did not show my pain and incredible discomfort in such childlike ways. "Bloody corset, bloody London fashion…" I muttered, getting a few odd looks from the spectators, and a cold glare from my father. Good God, these people were uptight. It's not like anything special was happening.
"May I have a moment?" Commodore Norrington asked, holding out his arm to Elizabeth. "Oh, yes Commodore, don't mind me, I don't mind at all," I muttered. The prick. And my prissy sister. I hoped they got married, perhaps they'd bore each other to death, but I dreaded to think of what their children would look like, let alone act like. And if they ended up killing each other, I'd have to raise the orphaned monsters. My father had wandered off to do whatever dizzy Governors do, perhaps to mingle with the new soldiers. I was left alone. Again. And so I decided to walk over to my dear sister and make sure the Commodore was not being too bold.
Not that I particularly cared.
"You look lovely, Elizabeth . I apologize if I seem forward but I…must speak my mind. This promotion throws into sharp relief that which I have not yet achieved – a marriage to a fine woman. You have become a fine woman, Elizabeth," the good Commodore was saying. I tried so very hard not to snort or snicker or do anything unladylike, but it was so very difficult. Was he referring to her personality? Because in that case he was sorely mistaken. She might be pretty, but she was far from a 'fine woman', whatever that meant. And Commodore Norrington didn't strike me as a very good judge of character, either.
Elizabeth looked as if she were going to have a seizure at any moment, or perhaps vomit, fanning herself rapidly and clutching her heart as if it would pop out of her chest. I didn't know which I hoped she'd do more, although all would be highly amusing.
"I can't breath," she choked out. "Yes, I'm a bit nervous myself," the Commodore agreed. He obviously thought that the poor chit's heart was racing, just because she had figured out he was going to propose. Sorry, Commodore dear, but it isn't you that has her breathless, it's the bloody fashion in London that doesn't agree with her. The Commodore looked pleased and eager, however. Evidently my sister's imminent suffocation was being taken as a good sign.
Good Lord, were all the men in Port Royal complete morons?
No, Will wasn't a moron. But if he fancied Elizabeth for something other than her looks, the poor boy might just be mental. I looked up again in time to see Elizabeth tumble over the edge of the wall and down to the rocks and the ocean below.
"Elizabeth!" I shrieked, hurling myself at the wall. What can I say, its Older Sibling Syndrome: the need to protect one's younger sister, no matter how infuriating she is. The Commodore was also yelling, but luckily had the sense, or the stupidity - I couldn't decide which - to grab me around the waist to keep me from tumbling in after her.
"You stupid worthless git, get your hands off me! ELIZABETH!" I screamed, wrestling as hard as I could. No use, the old scoundrel was too strong. Weren't old folks supposed to be frail?
"The rocks, Commodore, it's a miracle she missed them!" said one of the soldiers, most likely a First Mate or something, as Norrington made to climb over the wall. He climbed back and walked over to me and my father. "You coward, you'll just let her die then?" I spat. He was pale and shaking, and through it all my father managed to scold me, "Christina, you shall not talk that way to the Commodore," he said. I growled at them both, but my eyes widened as I saw two dark shapes emerge from the water.
"Look! Oh, look, someone's saved her!" I said, and we ran down to the docks. I was the first to reach my sister, despite my heavy dress. Men were so pathetic.
"Not breathing!" another soldier said, kneeling near my sister and looking pathetically helpless. "Move," the new man said roughly, decidedly not helpless, and cut open her corset. Elizabeth spit up water very attractively (Not. Not even Elizabeth could belch sea water and make it look attractive, although I'm quite sure no one expected her to. Except me.)
"Never would have thought of that," another soldier said in awe. "Clearly you've never been to Singapore," the man said, all wet and hero-looking. He looked like a rogue, with dark kohl under his eyes, sun burnt brown skin and long hair that shocked me because it wasn't a powdered white wig. And there were beads in his hair! He looked thrillingly exotic. I really need to stop these thoughts.
"On your feet," the Commodore said, but I was not quite sure if he'd said it to Elizabeth or to her savior, who was looking more and more like a pirate by the second. Needless to say, I was captivated by this man.
"Elizabeth! Are you alright?" my father asked, hastily taking off his jacket and wrapping it around her see-through bodice. He glared at the soldier who held her corset, and the soldier tossed the corset away and pointed to the man who had saved my sister. I scowled. Elizabeth certainly gets all the luck - having her corset torn apart by a dashingly handsome rogue who just also happened to save her life. It was the stuff of fairytales. At least, it was the stuff of the fairytales my mother used to tell us.
"Bloody hell, Elizabeth," I said, earning yet another glare from my father, "You scared me half to death, are you quite sure you're alright?" I said, putting an arm around her shoulder. My father smiled.
"Yes, I'm fine," she said, looking a bit shocked but happy that I had seemed so worried.
"Shoot him," my father said tightly, pointing at the man.
"What?" I gasped, and Elizabeth said, "Father! Commodore, do you really intend to kill my rescuer?" The Commodore sighed, "I believe thanks are in order," he said. He held out his hand, suspicion obvious in his face. As discreetly as I could, I gestured for the man not to shake the Commodore's hand. I drew a finger across my neck, as if slitting my throat. It was the universal sign for you do that and you're dead…Obviously not as universal as one would have thought.
The man, even he ignored me, paused a bit before shaking the Commodore's hand. Commodore Norrington roughly pulled up the man's sleeve, revealing a brand of a "P." I winced: it looked painful.
"Had a brush with the East India Trading company, did we, pirate?" the Commodore spat. "I knew it!" I said triumphantly and my sister pursed her lips.
"Hang him," my father said stiffly. "No!" I gasped, without an idea as to why. Oh bugger, why did everyone always glare at me like that?
"Keep your guns on him, men. Gillette, fetch some irons," our esteemed Commodore said curtly, pushing up the pirate's sleeve more. "Well, well… Jack Sparrow , isn't it?"
"Captain Jack Sparrow, if you please, sir," Captain Jack said. I laughed a little, getting glared at again. Damn all these people. Captain Jack grinned at me and I couldn't help but smile back. A real pirate.
"I don't see your ship…Captain," Norrington said snootily. If he pranced around a bit and wore pink, he could be a pixie.
"I'm in the market, as if were," Captain Jack said, a fake smile plastered on his face.
"He said he'd come to commandeer one!" idiot soldier number one said.
"Told you 'e was telling the truth. These are his sir," idiot soldier number two said, handing the Commodore Captain Jack's effects. The Commodore raised an eyebrow, "No additional shots nor powder. A compass that doesn't point north. And I half expected it to be made of wood," he said of the sword. "You are, without doubt, the worst pirate I've ever heard of," he said. I bit my lip.
"Ah, but you have heard of me," Jack said. I smiled again, this pirate knew he was doomed to the gallows and yet he could crack a joke. How…peculiar.
"Commodore, I really must protest, pirate or not this man saved my life." Elizabeth said, as if it would help. Perhaps I should teach her how to accept being ignored. "One good deed is not enough to redeem a man of a lifetime of wickedness," the Commodore patiently explained. "But it is enough to condemn it," Jack said darkly, as his hands were bound in irons.
"Indeed. Lieutenant," the Commodore called, leaving Captain Sparrow, for the moment, unguarded as he turned away. "Finally," Jack muttered, throwing the chain around Elizabeth's pretty little neck. Her eyes widened and she gasped. The idiot soldiers aimed their guns. "Don't shoot!" my father shouted.
"I knew you'd warm up to me. Commodore Norrington, my effects, please, and my hat. Commodore!" the pirate warned, and I was torn between wanting him to get away, and wanting my sister to be safe.
"Elizabeth, isn't it?" he asked. "Its Miss Swann," she said tightly. Good Lord, she was picky.
"Miss Swann, if you'd be so kind. Come, come, dear, we don't have all day. Now if you'd be very kind," he said, grinning a bit as she put on his belt. Oh, yes, she certainly does get all the luck.
"Easy on the goods, love," he said. I giggled shrilly, it really was quite funny how crude this man could be. "You are despicable," my sister spat. I'm sure she wouldn't have said that if it were Will Turner's belt she were putting on…or taking off for that matter. But then, nor would I, although this pirate wasn't half so bad as the fuss that Elizabeth was making... I kicked that thought hastily aside, but not before my cheeks could flush. Hormones on parade.
"Sticks and stones, love. I saved your life, you saved mine, we're square. Gentlemen, ladies," he said, nodding at me. I looked down hastily as my father glared at me. I was biting the inside of me cheeks to keep from smiling. "You will always remember this as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow!" he said, pushing Elizabeth into me, and me into the soldiers. I must admit that I fell rather willingly, so the soldiers would take longer to gather themselves together. Poor excuses for soldiers, they tumbled into the bay as something large crashed into the dock and tore a hole through it. I was too busy staring at the pirate, Captain Jack Sparrow, with avid fascination, to notice what had fallen. And then he was gone, grabbing a rope and swinging up somewhere to get away.
"Now will you shoot him?" my father yelled angrily. Oh yes, what fun it must be to be a pirate.