Title: How To Snag A Hottie From Your Prom Queen Of The Caribbean Sister
Author: Whose ff.net account are you currently at? Here's a hint, starts with a C and ends with a rystyna…
Disclaimer: That disclaimer was getting a bit boring wasn't it? Time for a new one! *pulls out magic curling iron* Will Turner, awaken and be mine!!! Poster, poster on the wall: Who's the fairest one of all?
Will Turner Poster: Elizabeth Swann!
Crystyna: Wrong answer babe. *burns poster of Elizabeth, does psychotic death-to-Elizabeth dance*
Will Turner: *faints*
Crystyna: Well, while he's sleeping…*turns to Jack Sparrow poster*
Jack: Don't look at me, luv.
0.o
…Yeah…and so I don't own anything remotely pirate related…
Summary: Elizabeth has a sister (called Christina) and they are complete opposites. Call it a Mary Sue if you must, frankly I don't give half a starved rat's ass. Or half of any rat's ass for that matter, even a fed and tamed one. Pro-Elizabeth…can read now I guess. I've changed my views on her. Now she's only slightly evil.
A/N: Right now it is 8:09 and high school starts tomorrow (9/08/03) *groan* so this is my last day of freedom before my banishment to hell (or so I've been told). I'm eating mint ice cream and listening to Evanessence and dreading tomorrow…wahh. But this chapter wont be posted for a while, cuz I write in advance *grin* so clever. ANYWAYZ…this story is coming 2 an end n I'm not gunna start anuta story till its ova sooo enjoy!!!
-to all my reviews: I LOVE YOU LOTS!! THANKS FOR REVIEWING!
-this chapter's a little longer than the others (and a little more pointless) so enjoy!
~*~
Currently, I am on the deck of the Dauntless. How much do you wanna bet that the first words out of my father's mouth are "Christina, what on earth are you wearing?" I swear…if he got any stupider he'd make a wet log look intelligent…Already he has to compete with inkpots and quills for a higher IQ.
"Christina, what on earth are you wearing? Elizabeth, here, take my jacket," He-Who-Owns-The-Largest-Brain said oh-so-intelligently. Sometimes it scares me how well I know him.
"Make for Port Royal," Norrington said to the First Mate, who started shouting orders to the crew. I stood by Jack, not quite sure I'd heard correctly.
"The Port?" I said stupidly. Ah, yes, I am my father's daughter. "But we've got to save Will!" Elizabeth shouted, tailing my father. He sighed. "No. You're safe now. We will return to Port Royal immediately not go gallivanting after pirates!" he said.
"G-gallivanting? Excuse me? And we're safe. As in me too!" I sputtered. God damn it, I might as well just talk to the ropes. My father glared at me, "You took your safety into your own hands, young lady," he said. Do you ever get the urge to just punch in your father's face? With a brick?
"Then we condemn him to death?" Elizabeth shrieked.
"The boy's fate is regrettable but then so is his decision to engage in piracy," Idiot-father said.
"FATHER, IF YOU HAD ANOTHER BRAIN, YOU MIGHT JUST HAVE A QUARTER OF A MIND!" I screamed. My father stared angrily at me. "You, daughter, are very much a disgrace to the Swann family. I will not have you embarrass me here. You will go into Commodore Norrington's office, which he has so graciously given up for you and your sister, and you will not come out until we arrive at Port Royal, is that understood?" he said quietly.
I raised my chin, glaring. "I will do no such thing, I am a grown woman and I will do as I choose. And I choose to stay here, among the crew, with Mr. Sparrow," I said. Elizabeth gawked at me. My father turned beet red and grabbed my arm.
"Listen to me, young lady, you will do as you're told. Already at the Port they are talking of the Governor's daughter who ran away, dressed as a cross between a man and a whore, and eloped with a pirate!" he said. I raised my eyebrows. "Well, they seem to have gotten to story quite wrong then. Will and I went to save Elizabeth, and Jack was our guide," I said snootily. HE glared at me.
"You listen hear, young lady -"
"Mum would have understood me. She wouldn't be quiet so DUMB!" I yelled. He didn't say anything for a moment, just looked at me. "You mother ran off with a pirate," he said lowly. Perhaps I would have felt bad if I wasn't so angry. Perhaps if I wasn't so angry I would have seen the old hurt in his eyes. But I was angry, and I didn't.
"And a fine choice she made, too. I wish she took me with her!" I snapped. He dragged me, nearly pulling my arm out of its socket, and practically threw me into the Commodore's office, slamming the doors behind him and locking them.
"LET ME OUT YOU HORRIBLE EXCUSE FOR A FATHER! LET ME OUT THIS INSTANT OR I SWEAR I WILL ELOPE WITH A PIRATE AND BRING SHAME UPON THE FAMILY NAME!" I screamed, banging on the doors. "Asshole," I swore under my breath, and listened to the conversation outside.
"To rescue me, to prevent anything from happening to me," Elizabeth whined.
"If I may be so bold as to interject my professional opinion, the Pearl was listing near the scappers after the battle. It's very unlikely she'll be able to make good time. Think about it, the Black Pearl, the last real pirate threat in the Caribbean, mate. How can you pass that up?" Jack said. I could practically hear him waggle his eyebrows.
"By remembering that I serve others, Mr. Sparrow, not only myself," the Commodore said disdainfully. Yeah, that's right, and he didn't come all this way just to get on Elizabeth's good side. Well, it was his duty, but he could have just sent out a crew. "LIAR!" I screamed and kicked the door.
"Commodore, I beg you, please do this. For me…as a wedding gift," Elizabeth said. My jaw dropped. She was going to marry him! Ugh! Why would she want to marry that tight arsed little prat who acted like he had a constant beetle biting up his rear end? And yet…if she married the Commodore…I sighed, if she married the Commodore, Will would still love her. Gag.
"Bloody Commodore, bloody sister, BLOODY PIRATES!" I screeched, grabbing a paper weight and hurling it across the room. I bit my tongue so hard to keep from crying that it brought tears to my eyes…which made me laugh. So I was sobbing and laughing and tossing all of Norrington's junk across the room with fervor, trying very hard to destroy everything of value. I may be condemned to this little shit hole, but that didn't mean that I had to keep it orderly.
"Elizabeth, are you accepting the Commodore's proposal?" my father asked. I threw a book. "I am," Elizabeth answered.
I hope Norrington didn't need that telescope…
"A wedding, I love weddings! Drinks all around!" Jack said. I seized a bottle of expensive aged wine and chucked it after the telescope. "THERE'S YOUR BLOODY DRINK!" And do you know what? They didn't hear me!
"I know, clap him in irons…"Jack mumbled.
…Or that compass. It looked real ritzy.
"Mr. Sparrow , you will accompany these fine men to the helm and provide us with the bearing to Isla de Muerta . You will then spend the rest of the voyage contemplating all possible meaning of the phrase 'silent as the grave'. Do I make myself clear?"
"Do I make myself clear, do I make myself clear?" I sneered. I found a portrait of Norrington hanging and I ripped it down and kicked it. "How's that for clear, you pompous, stupid arse?"
"Inescapably," Jack said. I ripped open a drawer and dumped out all its contents. Ooh, a brush! And a little…powder thing? Good god, and I'm the cross between a man and a whore?!
"Christina, stop! Stop! What are you doing?!" Elizabeth yelped, grabbing my arms and holding them down to my sides. I was in the middle of scattering powder all over the room. "You're going to marry the Commodore?" I asked, sniffling. She nodded. "Just to save Will?" She nodded again. I cried harder, and on impulse, hugged her. Perhaps being stuck on an island with the sister you hate, completely wasted, makes the heart grow fonder. "Thank you…oh, its not fair…you love him, don't you?" I asked. She nodded, tears coming to her eyes. "I do," she whispered heavily. I sighed.
"A fine mess we're in, aren't we?" I asked. She nodded, laughing a little. I went and sat on a table of some sort, grabbing a quill and ink jar and doodled all over one of Norrington's prized maps. "He's not that bad, I suppose," I said, stabbing the map. Elizabeth snickered.
"No, I suppose not," she said sarcastically. I decided I'd try to make her feel better. "Elizabeth…do you really love Will. I mean, you hardly talk to him," I said. She looked at me. "And you do?" she asked. I nodded. She narrowed her eyes. "You lie," she whispered. I shook my head.
"How?" she asked. I showed her my hands, which were callused from all the fencing lessons I'd been given, even with the gloves I'd worn. Not that they were much help…they were these stupid silk with lacy things... "What did you do, sneak into the blacksmiths shop?" she said incredulously. I raised my eyebrows, that was very clever, especially for Elizabeth. Maybe the pirates taught her something. "Well, actually, yes, that is what I do," I said. Elizabeth glared at me, "And you obviously don't wear proper clothing for that," she sniffed, looking down at me. Excuse me, but WHAT?
"What has that got to do with anything?" I asked.
"You're a whore, just like our mother was," Elizabeth said distastefully. I'm surprised my eyes didn't pop out of my head and roll around on the floor.
"Excuse me? Our mother was not a whore." I asked. She glared, "That's right, your mother was a whore. I don't consider her my mother. You skip off at night to join Will in your nightgown…you're just like our mother. And here I was thinking maybe you weren't, maybe you were nice,"
"Are you a complete fool Elizabeth? Maybe I was nice…what, like you're not a completely stuck up spoiled little wench? You are an idiot," I said, hopping off the table and sitting by the window.
"And you are a little tramp," she said. I just blinked. I was completely speechless. What happened? Where was the sister I had on the island? Did we leave her there? I nearly laughed. "You are just incredible. If only Will saw you like this," I said tiredly, and turned to stare back out the window. "After everything you have, you have his heart, he loves you. He got captured because he wanted to save you…He may be dead now for you…and you're still like this?" I asked. "You're a fool, Elizabeth, you don't deserve everything that has been given to you…and I was stupid to think maybe you had changed," I said quietly.
She huffed and walked out, slamming and locking the door behind her.
~*~
It was dark before the ship stopped. I looked out the porthole, and decide that I would not be kept here. Nothing was really keeping me here anyway, not my father, not Elizabeth…I'd just have to wait for the opportune moment, like Jack said, before leaving. I pushed open the window and made sure that I'd be able to squeeze out. The sea smelled so good, but it was so dark that all I could see was the faint twinkling of cold stars, and the dark outline of the island I would be headed to.
I adjusted my bandana, my hair was actually soft and brushed now (I'd found a comb as well as a brush and powder in on of the Commodore's desk drawers…just think, Elizabeth is marrying a man who carries a comb around with him! Tee hee! And it was one of those prissy ivory toothed combs too!) and that took at least five hours to do. I picked up yet another paperweight and was about to toss it around to the other side of the ship (so they'd go there and leave me to escape,) when my favorite person in the whole world barged in oh-so-politely.
I spun around to see Elizabeth being dragged in here by two officers. I raised an eyebrow. "Sorry, but for your own safety," one of them said. "Tell the Commodore! There's something I have to tell him! The pirates! They cannot be killed!" she said, struggling. This was so amusing. No, really, it was.
"Don't worry, miss, he's already informed of that. A little mermaid flopped up on deck and told him the whole story," the other officer laughed. The leered at me and walked out, still chuckling. I rolled my eyes. "This is Jack Sparrow's doing!" Elizabeth yelled at the doors, who merely slammed themselves in her face. I chuckled.
"Wont you ever learn, Elizabeth? Men will never believe such things, especially coming from three types of people: drunks, pirates, or women,"
"Well I guess you're in for a horrible life, aren't you, Christina?" she said nastily. "Considering you are a combination of all three." Oh, that is not even worth a response. When had I fooled myself that anything that came out of her mouth was worth a response?
She blinked, as if just realizing what she had said. "I'm sorry," she said quietly, looking down. Sure. I nodded. "Right then. Well, have fun," I said, hoisting myself out the window and dropping down into the little rowboat below. They'd be distracted already, they wouldn't notice me. I'd tossed my sword down into the boat earlier, so I was all set to go. I grabbed an oar…
…which was stuck.
"Thanks a lot," I said to the sky, tugging on the oar. No such luck, it stayed where it was. I pulled harder and it took me about five minutes to finally get it unstuck. I wanted to make a clean getaway, but obviously little Mrs. Norrington had other ideas.
I saw a rope of tied cloth come flying out the window as she lowered herself delicately down. Oh, no…
"What are you doing here?" I asked, annoyed. "I'm coming with you. You don't think I'd just stay there, do you?" she said.
"I was sort of counting on it," I muttered as she fell into the row boat. She looked at me. I sighed and started rowing. After about fifteen minutes of one of the most enjoyable activities in the world, Elizabeth spoke.
"I am sorry, you know. I don't know what came over me, I didn't mean all those things I said," she said quietly. "Oh, don't worry about it, Lizzy, I quite like being called a whore." I said, rowing harder. Elizabeth sighed. "Don't be like this, Christina," she said tiredly. I cursed.
"Don't even try to patronize me, Elizabeth. How dare you? I'm not even going to try to figure out what goes on in your so-called mind. Forget about it, alright? It doesn't matter to me what you say, or what our stupid father says, or what anyone says. So just give it up. We're not friends, so you don't have to apologize. We're just related by some strange accident." I snapped.
She looked hurt. Good, GOD! "I am sorry," she whispered. And I looked up to meet her eyes, and saw that she really did mean it. I mean, who knew? Perhaps she thought that my "friendship" could someday be of value to her?
I sighed, "Fine. It doesn't matter anyway." I said. Now would be a great time for her to shut up.
"It does matter. You're my sister…and I didn't mean what I said about Mum either. It's just, I'm so angry at her for leaving," she said.
"That was a long time ago, Elizabeth. Can you blame her?" I asked. Elizabeth looked at me.
"Yes, I can blame her. Didn't she love us? Should could have at least wrote to us. And father isn't that bad…" she whimpered. Oh, lord, here we go. Its time for me to play Loving Older Sister…
"She did love us. It would be worse if she wrote to us, it would have been to painful for her and for us and for Father too. She left because he was forcing her to be something she wasn't…he was forcing her to be some prim and proper lady, when all she really wanted was to be free," I said. I had hardly known my mother, but somehow I knew that was I was saying was true. I mean, it had to be, right? Who'd want to prance around all day in a corset with the words "I'm an arse, poke me,", or, "Ask me what its like to not breath!" practically written over their forehead. Oh, wait…Elizabeth would.
"Like you," Elizabeth said quietly. I looked up, "What are you talking about?" I asked. Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "You're just like her, Christina, you even look like her. Same hair, same eyes, same skin," she said. I snorted, "Your memory must've gone when that pirate smacked you. Haven't you seen the portrait of her in the den? She's all thin and fair and blonde, like you." I said. Elizabeth laughed quietly, "You really are oblivious to everything besides Will, aren't you?" she said. Her smiled faded when she saw I wasn't laughing.
"I'm sorry," she said hastily. She cleared her throat. "That picture in the den, that's because Father told the housekeeper we had back then, Rosa, do you remember her? Anyway, he told her to powder up mum and make her where that wig. That's what he wanted his wife to look like. And she went along with it," Elizabeth said. "That's why she never went out of the house, too." she continued.
"And you're angry at her for leaving?" I said. Elizabeth shook her head. "Sometimes I think I'm just upset that she didn't say good bye, or that she didn't take us with her. But Father, I love him too." she said.
"That's because you are perfect in his eyes," I said darkly, the bottom of the row boat scraping up against the shore. She looked at me. "He loves you too, Christina. You remind him so much of her, and he loved her, he was just stupid," she said. I shrugged. That last bit may have been the first smart thing she's ever said in her life.
"It doesn't matter to me," I said, even though it really did.
~*~
"Keep quiet," I said to Elizabeth, who was fidgeting. We were walking around the island. I had done a wonderful job of getting us lost, although Elizabeth had been absolutely no help at all. The wind was next to nothing, and the ocean was quiet. Elizabeth, however, must have felt the urge to make noise.
She was hissing to me how gross it was that she was in a man's clothing…and it wasn't very clean by the way. "Elizabeth, do the world a favor and shut yer trap," I snapped. She blinked. "You have been with Jack too much," she whispered. I closed my eyes. "Elizabeth, if you'd like to keep your tongue in your mouth, I suggest you shut up before I rip it out and cut it up into tiny pieces," I said calmly. She wrinkled her nose, but didn't make a sound. Thank God.
I heard voices coming from my left and saw the entrance to whatever cave thing the pirates must have been in. I strained my hearing as we drew closer. "Jack…?" I whispered, inching closer. Elizabeth was right behind me, practically breathing down my neck. I swear I will punch her one day.
"Elizabeth, back up a bit," I murmured. "What?" she said. I whirled around. "Stop talking!" I said through gritted teeth. She nodded, "Well, then stop talking to me," Oh, lord, my hair is turning gray, I can feel it. Her stupidity is grating. And just moments before she was actually feigning wisdom.
Jack was by the opposite side of the cave, nearly completely hidden in the shadows, and Will was only about five feet from me. I pulled Elizabeth down behind me and peered over a huge mound of gold coins. "No reason to fret, just a prick of the finger, a few drops of blood," the one of the pirates said. I think it was the fat one. Maybe it was Splinters…
"No mistakes this time, he's only half Turner. We spill it all," the pirate with the dreadlocks said. The fat pirates laughed, "Guess there's reason to fret then," he said. I whimpered, and Will looked up, and I swear he met my eyes, but I ducked behind the gold.
Barbossa began to chant over a huge stone box filled to the rim with gold coins. "The Aztec gold…" Elizabeth whispered. I glanced at her, her brown eyes were wide with fascination and longing. I recognized that look on her face from whenever she saw a particularly expensive dress that she coveted. I nudged her, "Don't even think about it, Liz," I muttered. She glared at me.
Jack began to make his way through the throng of pirates. I watched, bemused. He'd sure get himself killed… "Jack!" Will said, surprised. He was bent over the stone box, Barbossa's knife at his throat. The muscles in my legs tensed, it was all I could do to not race over and tackle Barbossa and kill him. "S'not possible," Barbossa said intelligently. Jack grinned.
"Not probable," he answered. "Where's Elizabeth? And Christina? Where's Christina?" Will said. Elizabeth tutted beside me. I clenched my fists and pretended I was strangling her. I let out a breath, "He mentioned you first, you nitwit," I whispered harshly under my breath. This seemed to satisfy her and she began to inspect her nails.
"Elizabeth? She's safe, just like I promised. She's all set to marry the Commodore, just like she promised, and you're all set to die for her, just like you promised. So really, we're all men of our word, except for Elizabeth, who is, in fact, a woman. And as for Christina…she's locked in the Commodore's office throwing about all his stuff…after trying so desperately to save your life," Jack said. Will blinked. I swear I shall punch Jack Sparrow if he gets out of here alive.
"Shut up, you're next," Barbossa said angrily, glaring at Jack. He grabbed Will by the hair and put the knife up to his throat. I tensed and Elizabeth grabbed my arm (seeing as how I was halfway over the little ledge type thing that was hiding us). "Let go you stupid moron," I hissed. She said nothing, but nodded towards the direction of the pirates.
"Your funeral," Jack was saying in his usual infuriating way. Barbossa sighed, straightening up and glaring at Jack. Will's life was spared…for the moment. I swear I shall kiss Jack Sparrow if he gets out of here alive!
I turned around and started to look for a weapon of some sort…quietly of course. I mean, yes I had my sword…but if someone had managed to leave a pistol lying around for some unforeseen reason…Aha! There's one…a gold one…look stylish while you blow someone's face apart…
" Promise your Uncle Fannie's your Aunt, there you are with two ships. The makings of your very own fleet. 'Course you'll take the grandest as your flagship and who's to argue? But what of the Pearl ? Name me Captain, I'll sail under your colors, I'll give you ten percent of me plunder and you get to introduce yourself as…Commodore Barbossa. Savvy?" Jack said. I snorted. "That lying bastard!" Elizabeth said snootily. I sighed at her. "How could he do that to us, Lizzy? How could he lie like that?" I said sarcastically. She patted my arm. "Don't worry, Christina, we'll save Will even without Mr. Sparrow," she said sympathetically and completely serious. I just stared at her witheringly. She seemed to take my silence for doubt. She hugged me and whispered, "I promise,"
I think I may just die. Is this half-wit truly a blood relation?
"You've been planning this from the beginning. Ever since you learned my name," Will said furiously. I couldn't tell if he was just playing along…or if he truly meant it. I hoped he was just playing along, because if he was as stupid as my sister, it would be devastating to me. Truly devastating.
"Yeah," Jack said. Jack and Barbossa continued to haggle over how much plunder Barbossa would get if he let Jack be the Captain of the Pearl…I started to wonder if Jack would really go so far to get the Pearl back. He wouldn't. Would he?
AH! My sister's stupidity is infecting my mind!!
I inched away from Elizabeth and continued to tinker with the pistol to see how it worked. I held it up against a rock and started fiddling with the little gadgets. Of course, I had to find a gold gun with magical powers and little do-dads everywhere…
"Me? I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest... Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to -"
BANG.
Elizabeth screamed as the gun went off in my hands, causing the remainder of the pirates, Barbossa, Jack, and Will to look at me. I was still holding the pistol, and had just mortally wounded the rock in front of me. "Sorry, continue Jack," I said, nudging Elizabeth into a corner and trying to hide her from view.
"Oh, if it isn't the young Miss Turner! Would ye lookie thar?" one of the pirates cackled. "Shut up, bring 'er here," Barbossa snapped. I grabbed my sword and held it out in front of me as the pirate advance. "Look, she's got a sword. How cute," the pirate sneered. I grinned.
"Look, you have no nose. Isn't that just adorable?" I said as the pirate roared in pain and anger. "Run Elizabeth!" I shouted, skirting around a huge pile of gold and running up to Will. I cut open the bonds on his hands as I heard Jack mutter "You can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly stupid,"
And then he started fighting with Barbossa.
I didn't know how many pirates stayed behind, but Barbossa must've had a might big crew, because it wasn't only a handful Will and I had to fight off. Elizabeth was God-knows-where, hiding behind a rock most likely.
Will and I stood back to back as about seven pirates stalked up to us. We were surrounded. "What do you propose we do, maestro?" I muttered darkly. He grabbed the pistol at my waist and held it up to the pirate in front of him. He shot the man…thing…in the face. I grimaced, not a pretty sight. "We can start by doing that," Will said, and attacked.
Four of the pirates made straight for Will, as the first one was down and heading for the moonlight. That left two for me. "Ye were jess lucky before, missy, but ye can't fight both of us and expect to live," one of them growled. I sighed. "Oh, I suppose not. Whatever shall I do?" I asked, inching away. I felt behind me with one hand and found a large (gold, go figure) jar. I held out my sword, making it tremble. They cackled and tossed their swords aside. I raised an eyebrow, that was unexpected.
"I think we can handle this one without swords, don't ye think?" the other one asked. I smiled, "Sure ye can, mates," I crowed, hurling the jar at the closest one and spinning to the other, who was now in the moonlight. My sword connected with his neck and I watched as his skull flew across the cavern, screaming curses. Wow…now that's interesting.
"Cocky bastards," I said smugly, turning around. The other pirate was up and about, with a sword this time. I gritted my teeth as he attacked. I parried, narrowly, and maneuvered so that I wasn't up against a wall. We fought, I lunged, he dodged and Will shouted. I turned to find Will, who was actually shouting for me to get out of the way.
And suddenly there was a really sharp pain across my ribs. I cried out and stared to see that I'd be slashed on the right side of my ribs. I looked up at the pirate, who was grinning. I groaned as I pulled my sword up to knock his blade away. He obviously thought that I'd faint from the shock of being injured, and when I advanced again he was in the moonlight. Soon his head joined his comrade's across the cavern, screaming curses.
Will was by my side now. "Are you okay? Christina, are you okay?" he asked. I looked up, dazed. "He…cut me!" I said indignantly. Will smiled weakly, gingerly touching my side. I hissed and pulled away, "Don't," I said, tears stinging my eyes. It really hurt.
"I'm gonna teach you the meaning of pain!" the another roared. Attractively, I might add. And then suddenly, Elizabeth was there with a big…stick.
"You like pain?" she said, very heroine-like and smacking him wickedly, right where his head was under his arm. "Try wearing a corset," she spat, and pranced back to us. I groaned and Will looked at me worriedly again. "Who's side is Jack on?" Elizabeth asked. "At the moment?" Will asked. I glared, "Well, obviously…oh my God, Jack's a skeleton!" I screeched. And he was! Jack and Barbossa were fighting…and both of them were skeletons! I nearly fainted, although that might have been from blood loss.
Elizabeth noticed how Will grabbed my arm. "Stop being so dramatic, Christina," she said disgustedly. I looked up at her tiredly, but it was Will who said "Cant you see she's hurt?" He looked so angry, I could have sung! Take that Miss Perfection! She was gawking at him, and then at me, and then at my ribs, and then at him again. Yes, dear, he did just yell at you.
But I didn't. "Its fine, its not that bad. Not even that deep. Come on, there's four more pirates that need killing," I said, pulling away. Will stayed close by my side as I hoisted my sword up to fight. But I couldn't hold it, the right side of my body hurt so much. I looked down and saw my shirt soaked with blood and I swayed. Will grabbed my arm. "Christina, you cant fight. You're hurt," he said, tugging my over to where there was a little niche in the wall for me to hide. I, however, had other plans.
"I'm fine, Will, honestly. Its just a scratch. It doesn't even hurt that much," I said. He glared at me, "You're not fighting, you cant even hold the sword,"
"Yes I can!"
"Oh really? Show me then," he said.
I tried. I really tried but my arm wouldn't obey and it hurt so much…I felt hot tears streaking down my face and I choked. "Shh," Will whispered, we were in the corner now. He gently untied my makeshift corset (that at one point was a robe with flowers), and stooped to soak it in water. He rung it out, washing most of the blood off, and wrapped it around me tightly. I yelped and tried to pull away, but he wouldn't let me go. "It has to be tight, or the blood wont stop," he said, sounding choked. Oh sure, Elizabeth gets a "Blacksmith's hands, I know they're rough," and all I get is a "It has to be tight blah blah," Life is so unfair.
"Promise me you'll stay here, alright?" he said, looking at me with an apologetic smile. Sick bastard. Here I am bleeding to death and he's smiling like its all good. "WILL, HELP!" shrieked my sister, running away from a couple of pirates, who were chasing her with umbrellas. Will squeezed my hand and dashed off to save Little Miss Wonder Curls…her stupid hair was still perfect. I sighed and looked up at my hair, once again knotted all over my face and looking simply stunning. Stunning - as in, if I turned too quickly and someone was beside me, I'd knock them out.
"Oww…" I whimpered pathetically, putting my hand gently to my ribs and seeing that, when I pulled it away, it was still covered in blood. Well, seeing as how no one was around, Will was off saving my sister from certain death by parasol wielding pirates, and Jack was getting his kicks by wiping the floor Barbie's smelly old arse…I untied the stupid blood soaked sash and unbuttoned my shirt, nearly fainting when I saw the state of my ribs.
There was a huge gash about eight inches long and just gushing blood. I sat down and wet the cloth, God know's what kind of tiny little germ buggers were in the vile water but hey I'm gonna die anyway, right? Besides, the cold water felt good. Making sure at least half of my shirt was buttoned (just in case some perverted pirates, or Jack, decide to amble on over) I cleaned the cut. Which was more of a huge hole in my side.
It was incredibly disgusting, but once I was done cleaning it I realized it wasn't that deep. It just didn't seem to agree to my plea of "Stop bleeding, stop bleeding," God, are they ever going to be done killing each other? I could really use a doctor. But, once again (and one would think that I'd gotten over this by now) I was sitting in a corner, inches from death most likely, and being totally and thoroughly ignored.
And suddenly there was a huge BANG and everything was quiet.
~*~
A/N: Wow it took me LITERALLY three weeks to write this chapter. Mostly because high school is evil. Very very evil. Well, this story is nearly over (altho by the time I post this chapter it very well may be February and right now its September 26 and I have to go APPLE PICKING tomorrow. Huzzah!)
LoL well reviews would be quite lovely. Please? I'll give ya…a miniature Will or Jack (or for you hater fan girls, [like myself] a little Elizabeth to maim and destroy teehee!) or perhaps the Freaky Eye Dude and The-One-Of-Fat-Short-And-Baldness, or perhaps Barbossa tickles your fancy?
Of course, there's always the monkey…