DISCLAIMERS: oops! My first upload, & I forgot all disclaimers. So, here tis —

I own nothing, am making no money, and acknowledge my sever abuse of storyline in this chapter. Now that I've recovered from the death of my fav character Sirius Black, over which I raged for an unseemly amount of time, I apologize sincerely for any insults, stated, implied or otherwise, that anyone may feel. Please remember that this story is the convoluted result of a two-hour HP bashing session that I felt might be interesting/amusing for people to read, and I will remove this story from the site if anyone is excessively insulted or generally angry.

Also, I'm American and don't properly know what "git" or "berk" truly mean, therefore I can't tell if I'm swearing horribly or not, so please forgive. Please drop a review, however tiny, in the slot before you proceed to another fic. Thanks!