Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters, places, etc. associated therein. Everything but the plot of this one story belongs to JK Rowling and publishers.
Chapter: 2/14
They think I need some time to myself
I try to smile, but I can't remember
And I know tomorrow there will be nothing else
~Hotel Paper by Michelle Branche
Hermione drifted through a darkness she could not escape. She was vaguely aware of noises and people around her, but she barely paid them any mind. She sat listlessly in her family room. People came and went, but she had little remembrance of them. Many offered their condolences, even offering her a room for as long as she needed it. She politely turned them down, saying she already had made the arrangements and thanked them for their concerns. Two detectives had gently questioned her, careful not to awake the pangs of grief that had become a part of her. She told them her story of the time before she went to sleep the night before, until the minute they had arrived on the scene. They seemed dissatisfied, and she could relate. She had gone over her motions for the past week and she could not find a single thing that would point to her parents' sudden death. When she was asked about the Dark Mark that was very slowly fading, she had lied, saying she had no idea what it was.
The only slightly bearable part of the long, tedious morning had been a brief visit from Bill Weasley and his co-worker, Showna Applegate. They had snooped around for magical clues, offered their sympathy and assured her members of the Order would be there before the day was out to take her back to 12 Grimmauld Place where they would care for her. Shortly after they left, her grandparents, looking older than ever, had arrived, assuring her that they would be moving in with her until she left for school in the fall.
Eventually, her grandfather had shooed everyone, save the police, off of the property. With shaking hands, her grandmother made a pot of tea and offered a cup to her. Hermione drank it listlessly, not really tasting the sweet herbal tang. At seven o'clock, she excused herself and made her way up to her bedroom. Upon entering, her eyes had fallen on a picture of herself and her parents in front of the Eiffel Tower. There would be no more summer vacations to far away places, no more Christmases spent at home. All those times she had remained at Hogwarts, she could have been at home, spending time with her parents. Now she finally knew how Harry felt. She was an orphan. Last night, she had lain on her family room floor watching the six o'clock news with her father and helped her mother in the kitchen, and now she was an orphan.
Finally, her stiff composure snapped and she flung herself down on the bed, screaming in frustration. She beat at her pillows and flung anything she could get her hands on. She was completely overcome by grief, unaware of her surrounding. Tears streamed down her cheeks. "Why?" she screamed. "Why did this happen?" No one answered her, and she continued her rampage. But even fueled by her grief, she could not continue her mad mourning for very long. She quickly fell down in the middle of her floor, clutching fitfully at a nearby pillow. Her screams became whimpers and the tears ceased their flow. Emotionally exhausted, she lapsed into sleep.
Remus frowned at Mr. Morgan. The man was determined that he not be admitted to see Hermione, not him, or Tonks or Molly. "Sir, its very important," he pleaded. "I'm aware of your loss, and though I sympathize greatly, please understand. I am here for the benefit of your granddaughter. Do you not hear me? I am...was...her professor. I am not likely to take her off somewhere and murder her!"
"You're right!" huffed Mr. Morgan. "We have lost our daughter and son-in-law today. I am not about to see my granddaughter taking off by complete strangers. Professor or no, we're family!"
"Does Hermione have a legal godfather or godmother?" Remus asked, quite patiently considering that he had been listening to the man's arguments for almost fifteen minutes.
"No," he admitted grudgingly. "But we are her grandparents for heaven's sake! Surely we have the right to take care of her!"
"Perhaps," acknowledged Remus. "But you did not take this into consideration." He flourished a sealed document under the man's nose. Suspiciously, Mr. Morgan grabbed it and broke the seal. His face turned a deep purple. Remus had half-expected as much. He did not need to see the paper to guess what it read.
If my said significant other does not so survive me, I nominate and appoint my daughter's headmaster and deputy headmistress, ALBUS DUMBLEDORE and MINERVA MCGONAGALL, to have custody of my infant child during her respectful minority.
Dumbledore had required both the Grangers and the Weasleys to rewrite their wills in case they were murdered, as unthinkable as the possibility had seemed. Dumbledore was not about to let anyone who was near to Harry escape his protection. Mr. Morgan re-read the document several times, but Remus knew for a fact that it was legitimate and he could never find anything proving otherwise. "You might be interested in this as well," Molly put in bluntly. She had stood there, getting redder and redder in the face through the entire interview, while Tonks had managed to look amused. Molly handed Mr. Morgan a letter addressed to himself and Mrs. Morgan.
As Professor Minerva McGonagall and myself cannot come to pick up Hermione Granger ourselves, we have sent our comrades and coworkers, Remus Lupin, Molly Weasley and Nymphadora Tonks to collect her in our stead. Naturally, as soon as we have settled down in our new home, you will be able to visit Hermione whenever you wish.
Yours truly,
Headmaster Albus Dumbledore.
Angrily grumbling under his breath, Mr. Morgan ushered them into the house. There were flower arrangements scattered haphazardly everywhere, adorned with cards of sympathy. He lead them through the kitchen, the counters scattered with many dishes sent by helpful neighbours and occupied by a woman who was obviously Mrs. Morgan. "What do these admirable people want?" she demanded, glancing at them all suspiciously. If she thought they were admirable, Remus would hate to see how she looked at people she despised. Mr. Morgan quickly explained it all. Outraged, Mrs. Morgan demanded a look at the documents and searched them throughly for signs of forgery. When she could find none, she agreed that one of them might come up and talk to Hermione. She also let them know, that if Hermione did not know every last one of them, they could get off the property right quick and the law be damned.
Remus managed to convince Molly that he was the best choice, and then followed Mrs. Morgan up the stairs. She lead him to a closed door. She tapped softly on the wood. There was no response. "Hermione?" she inquired. Still no answer. Becoming a little frantic, she rattled the doorknob. It was locked. Heart in his throat, hoping against hope that the Death Eaters had not returned, Remus tried the door himself. No avail.
"Hermione!" he shouted. "Its Remus Lupin! Please answer if you're in there!" There was no sound. Fear pricked the back of his mind. If they had killed her, he would never forgive himself for not coming sooner or insisting that she return to 12 Grimmauld Place as soon as school let out, or...something! "Mrs. Morgan," he said sternly. "Please go downstairs immediately. If you hear any shouting, send Tonks up instantly."
Looking a bit shocked that she was obeying him, Mrs. Morgan swiftly stalked down the hallway and down the stairs. Remus whipped out his wand as soon as she was out of sight and pointed it at the lock. "Alohomora!" he whispered. The door unlocked and he hastily swung it open. He gasped in horror as he caught sight of Hermione. She was curled up on her floor. Her hair fell in her face and her eyes were closed. He knelt by her and saw with great relief that she was only sleeping. He tenderly brushed the hair from her tear-stained face and saw with pity that if her face was any indication, she was not even allowed peace in her dreams. She shuddered occasionally, and there was a pained expression on her pale face.
"Hermione," he whispered, gently shaking her. Her eyes fluttered open and she stared at him, eyes slightly glazed over. She blinked a few times and he could tell her vision had focused. Her bottom lip trembled.
"Oh, Professor Lupin," she murmured, her voice shaking. "Thank goodness you woke me up. I had an awful dream. Death Eaters killed my parents and left the Dark Mark over my house. But, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at the Black Manor? I sent you a letter."
"I got your letter yesterday morning," Remus told her. "But, Hermione, it...it wasn't a dream." Her face drained of the little colour it had regained and her eyes watered again instantly.
"Oh, God," she moaned. "Oh, please. Tell me you're lying."
Remus helped her sit up and only grunted slightly as she flung herself at him. Her nails dug in through his robes and he could tell he was quickly becoming her only flotation device. "Shh," he soothed, stroking her curled hair. "Hush, its going to be all right. I am taking you back to 12 Grimmauld Place. You're going to be looked after, I swear." The muffled whimpers coming from her mouth, buried in his chest, indicated she was crying again. Her slight body shook in his arms.
"Oh, Hermione!" gasped a voice from the doorway. Molly Weasley stood in the doorframe, tears threatening to overflow from her motherly eyes. She knelt down by them and tried to unpry Hermione from Remus. If anything, Hermione's grasp tightened around his middle. "Hermione, its Molly Weasley. Are you ready to come home? You know you'll be welcome to stay at the Burrow whenever you need to!"
Hermione did not move. Her muffled voice came out. "Where are you staying right now, Professor?" she inquired.
"Ah, I'm at the Black Manor right now," he answered, looking flabbergasted at the girl clinging desperately to him. He had never known Hermione to be a clingy girl. The death of her parents must have affected her more strongly than he had suspected.
"Then I will go there too," Hermione declared. He awkwardly patted her head and exchanged helpless glances with Molly over her head.
"Of course," he nodded. "You'll be more than welcome. But....uh, maybe we should go there...right now?"
Hermione didn't pay his words any notice, just clinging desperately to him. His robes were quickly becoming damp, due to her tears. Her breathing slowed and he realized she had fallen asleep again. "What was that?" he whispered to Molly, careful not to wake the slumbering girl.
Molly smiled sadly. "I've heard about this before, its quite a common reaction," she explained. "The poor dear lost her entire world when her parents were killed. The first person she sees that she truly cares for and makes her feel safe, becomes a bit of a lifesaver for her. Her subconsciousness has basically told her that you are the only one who can give her her old life back."
Remus gently scooped her up and brushed the hair off of her face. "Well, lets hope she can find a new lifesaver in Ron, or Harry... or you," he said roughly. "She certainly doesn't need a lifesaver in the form of a werewolf." He stalked out of the room, face grim. Molly noticed that he still kept a very firm grip on the girl.
Tonks was waiting for them downstairs, with a worried look on her face. Mr. and Mrs. Morgan had retreated to the living room. "'Allo again," Tonks greeted warmly. Her face softened at the sight of Hermione in Remus' arms. "Aw, poor kid. You're going to have to be very gentle with her, Remus. Unless I miss my guess, she'll consider you something of a lifesaver from now on."
"Why is it that women are aware of this?" snapped Remus. "If someone had let me in on it, I certainly wouldn't have dashed upstairs."
Tonks fixed him with a look that brooked no nonsense. "You didn't exactly give us chance, Lupin," she pointed out. "Besides, you were the one who was so anxious to pay her back for protecting you from the students and their parents for an entire year. Now's your chance. C'mon, the Morgans aren't gonna let us leave without saying goodbye."
They made their way into the living room, Tonks leading, followed by Remus who retained his careful grasp on Hermione, and Molly brought up the rear, a knowing smile on her face. Mrs. Morgan lept to her feet when they entered and dashed over to Hermione. "What have you done to her?" she cried. Her raised voice shocked Hermione awake.
"Relax, Mrs. Morgan," soothed Tonks. "She was just sleeping. Can you ask her if she knows us, so we can get out of here?"
Mrs. Morgan shot a very sharp glare at Tonks. "Hermione, dear," she said softly. "Do you know these people?"
Hermione nodded very slowly, her grip on Remus tightening even more. If she kept it up, Remus doubted he would be able to breath. "Yes, and I want to go with him," Hermione replied.
Mrs. Morgan's eyebrows snapped up in surprise. "Well, they have legal documents giving them permission to take you," she admitted grudgingly. "If its what you really want to do, then I suppose you can. But, call us as soon as you get wherever you are going. We want to visit at least once a week."
"I'll write," Hermione promised. She slipped away from Remus and allowed her grandmother to embrace and kiss her. Remus noted that she was as stiff as a board in her grandmother's arms. Her grandfather pressed his lips to her forehead.
"The funeral is in three days, poppet," he informed her. "At St. Peter's. If we don't see you until then, just keep your chin up."
"I will," Hermione promised him, her voice devoid of any conviction. Finally, Remus managed to get Hermione away from her grandparents. He took a deep breath of the fresh air when they finally made it outside. In silence, the small party walked down her street until they reached the nearest corner. After rounding it, Remus quickly made sure there were no Muggles around to see them disappear into thin air.
Hermione, who had clutched his arm throughout the entire walk, did not loosen her grip when he drew out his wand. He wrapped her in his arms and clutched her tightly to him. "Hold on very tightly," he instructed. He needn't have said anything. He doubted it was humanly possible for Hermione to grasp him tighter than she already was.
He pointed his wand at himself and Disapparated, only to Apparate in sight of the Black Manor. His breath caught at sight of the house. Unwillingly, memories flooded him, memories of Sirius. He could almost see Sirius dashing up the lane, racing Harry and throwing snowballs back at him. Hermione must have noticed his choking, for she glanced up at him. His heart almost broke. Even after having lost her parents that morning, she managed to put pity into her gaze. "I'm so sorry, Professor," she whimpered. "I have been so selfish since you got here. I can't believe I almost forgot you've lost someone recently as well."
Remus knelt by Hermione so he could easily look her in the eye. "Hermione, please," he begged. "Please, don't put away your own grief for mine. I lost a dear friend a week ago. I am not trying to say I am over Sirius, but you lost your parents this morning. I completely understand if you need me to be strong for you." She smiled shakily. He stood and slipped his hand into her smaller one. "Come on," he coaxed. "Lets go home, shall we?"
The walk was fairly brief and they were soon joined by Molly and Tonks. The door to the Manor flung open before they reached it and Ron Weasley came dashing out. "Hermione!" he shouted. He was soon upon them. He flung his arms around Hermione with reckless abandon. Remus smiled lightly. From the times he had seen the two of them together, it was clear to him Ron was rather smitten with Hermione. An awkward tension had formed between them, one not shared by Harry and Hermione. It seemed that in his desire to comfort Hermione, Ron had set his feelings aside.
Hermione went stiff as a board in his embrace as well. He stepped back a bit. "I am so sorry, 'Mione," he said softly. "I don't know how I can help you, but if you need anything, I can give it to you! I've already written to Harry and he is going to write to Dumbledore to see if he can't come to 12 Grimmauld Place to be here for you."
Hermione's face was a perfect study in indignation. "Ronald Weasley!" she snapped. "You are possibly the most inconsiderate person I've ever met! How could you do that? Have you forgotten that Harry as good as lost a parent a week ago? He doesn't need to force himself to be strong for his friend! Couldn't you give him some time to himself? And what right do you have to tell Harry something that only concerns me? Did you ever think that perhaps I wanted to tell Harry myself?"
Ron looked startled, and more than a little crushed. "I....I just...I didn't think...." he stuttered.
"That is obvious!" Hermione snarled. She sprang away from Ron and rushed inside the house.
Ron watched her go, his heart in his eyes. "What did I do?" he asked helplessly. Molly sighed and clapped her son on the shoulder.
"Don't worry yourself, Ron," she soothed. "Hermione is going through a very difficult period in her life right now. Not everything she says is going to make sense. Lets go inside and see if we can't set things straight." She calmly led Ron inside, leaving Tonks and Remus to follow on their own.
Mrs. Black remained unusually silent when Remus passed, no doubt caught off guard by Hermione bursting into the house unannounced. He wearily followed Tonks into the kitchen. Judging by the level of noise that echoed out into the hall, Hermione's entrance had not gone unnoticed. He sighed heavily, half-wishing he had never gotten out of bed in the morning.
Upon entering the kitchen, he was greeted with almost half of the Order of the Phoenix. There was a meeting in three days, and the closer to the meeting, the more members who took up residence. Kingsley, Moody and Fletcher were sitting at the table, all engrossed in a map. Professors McGonagall, Snape, Flitwick and Vector were standing around the island, deep in conversation. Minerva threw the occasional glance towards the stairs, where Hermione had most probably fled. Arthur, Charlie, Ron, Fred and George were seated at the far end of the table, all being fed by Molly, who was on her way over to the Professors, offering refreshments. Tonks crossed over to Dawson Walker, Showna Applegate and Clay Stoat. They had all gone to Hogwarts together and were collectively the youngest members of the Order. When the older members were out in full force, they tended to retreat meekly into a corner and wait for instructions to be given out. Remus made his way over to the Professors. Vector and Flitwick greeted him warmly, Snape sneered what might have been a greeting, but McGonagall fixed him with one of her piercing stares. "Did you bungle perhaps one of the easiest missions ever given to you, Remus Lupin?" she snapped. "Not two minutes ago, Miss. Granger came running in here, tears pouring down her face. I've got that sorry excuse for a house elf searching for her, but I half-suspect he won't do a blasted thing. Ever since Sirius died, he's been completely..." He face paled, obviously realizing she'd slipped.
"Oh, very well done, Minerva," sighed Vector, shaking her regal head. She was a very pretty woman, with long auburn hair and sharp grey eyes, almost hidden by oval glasses. She frequently clashed heads with Minerva and seemed to be the only person capable of getting a rise out of the deputy Headmistress. "Honestly, sometimes you have all the subtly of a bull charging through a china shop."
Minerva fumed silently, shooting death glares at the Amara Vector. She opened her mouth, no doubt to coldly reprimand Amara. Although Amara had had no difficulty forgetting Minerva had been her Transfiguration teacher, Minerva never forgot a student and was quite convinced that any student- past, present or future, could be severely reprimanded. However, she never got the chance. The kitchen doors slammed open to admit none other than the Head of the Order of the Phoenix, Albus Dumbledore. The room fell silent, everyone staring at the elderly wizard. He had a tendency of popping in when least expected. Lately, his visits had become remarkably briefer and further in between. Matters at the Ministry had him running day and night. "Good afternoon, everyone," he greeted. "I trust everything is going well?" Even cold Snape and stiff-necked Dawson Walker were quick to assure Dumbledore that things were going perfectly according to plan and all his orders had been carried out swiftly and successfully. "Wonderful," he complimented. "I would like a chance to talk to every last one of you, but, unfortunately, I do not have the luxury. I'm expected back in London by five o'clock to dine with the Canadian Minister of Magic. Remus, Minerva, Severus, Molly and Kingsley- a word." He motioned sharply and walked through a door leading off of the kitchen. Remus followed Minerva and the others, his mind carefully processing anything that all five of them had worked together on.
The room he lead them to was the meeting room for the Order of the Phoenix. "Please, sit down," encouraged Dumbledore, taking his custom seat at the head of the table. Remus and Minerva sat beside him. Snape sat beside Minerva, and Molly took a place next to him. Kingsley sat beside Remus.
"What seems to be the problem, Albus?" inquired Kingsley, eyes focused intently on his boss.
"Not a problem, really," Dumbledore admitted. "As I am sure all of you will be to eager to help out. As you know, Hermione Granger lost her parents this morning. Minerva and I are now her legal guardians, but neither of us feel we can make the commitment due to a sixteen year old girl. After talking it over, we came to an agreement that the four of you, would be the best choices. Hermione is a very bright girl, well-mannered and skilled beyond belief in her schoolwork. Within a few months, she managed to work out Remus' secret, while it took his best friends, two of whom were exceptionally bright themselves, almost two full years. You will only be excepted to take care of Hermione two months in the year as she has the tendency to remain at Hogwarts for the Christmas and Easter breaks."
"I hardly think I am an appropriate choice," Snape said the moment Dumbledore finished speaking. "Hermione and I are not what you would call fond of each other. I highly doubt she would want to live with me so quickly after losing her parents, and, quite frankly, I have neither the desire, nor the patience, to deal with any more adolescences than I have to. I like to consider the summer holidays a vacation for me."
"Point disagreed with, yet taken," Dumbledore nodded. "What about you, Kingsley?"
"I would love to take Hermione in," Kingsley answered. "But, I don't really know her that well. We've only talked a few times during last summer. Plus, I have a teenage son right now who is ruled by his hormones. I'm not home that often either what with work and the Order. If I'm the only one, I'd be more than happy to though."
Dumbledore nodded in full agreement, then glanced at Molly. "I would love to take her in, as well," Molly said, voice full of conviction. "And, I would normally say that I'm the best choice. Hermione and I have known each other since her third year and we get along quite well. Plus, she's good friends with Ron and Ginny and gets on with the other boys. But, I am going to have to decline. I think she should go to Remus'. He practically raised Sirius for the past two years."
"What?" exploded Remus. "I couldn't imagine a worse choice. You know, there was a reason James and Lily decided on an irresponsible man who was still half a child for the godfather of their son! Its because their other option was a werewolf! Hermione should go to the Burrow."
"I couldn't disagree more," Minerva put in. "Anyone can see the girl's fond of you, Remus. Besides, Hermione isn't a small boy who wouldn't know the difference between a pet poodle and a wolf. She can take care of herself, and you have the potion now. She'll be perfectly safe."
"Yes," Molly nodded fervently. "And you saw her today, Remus. You were the only one keeping her on her feet. You'll be good for her and she for you!"
"I concur," Snape said with a smirk. "Maybe she could teach you something, Lupin. Have you ever thought of that? A lot better for you than Black ever was!"
Remus shot Snape a glare. "No, I haven't, Snivelilus," he retorted. Snape jerked back as though stung.
"That will be enough of that!" intervened Dumbledore, angry eyes on Remus. "I had thought Sirius was the child of the Mauraders!"
"Will you stop saying his name?" roared Remus, feeling all the old pain rising up. "Merlin! I'd take her in, if you would all just shut it!"
"Then its settled!" Dumbledore smiled. "Hermione will go to Remus'!"
Remus sat back in his chair, absolutely floored. "Dumbledore, surely you are not going to allow this?" he argued. "I couldn't live with myself if I hurt her."
"Then don't hurt her," Snape suggested. "Or do, and get on with the suicidal bit." The man was positively gloating.
"Its not quite that easy!" Remus snarled.
"We all know its difficult for you, Remus," Dumbledore sympathized. "But, I think Severus has a valid point. I think Hermione will be good for you. Unless of course, all this talk about owing her a debt has been cock-and-bull."
Remus thought quickly. Dumbledore was right, of course. All this protesting was making him appear to hate Hermione. It was quite the opposite. It would be wonderful to have some company around the house. They just didn't understand. If the unthinkable happened, Hermione's bright future would be dashed, because of him. He couldn't live with that. He sighed heavily. They were right about that too. There was the potion, and Hermione was bright enough to stay in her room during his transformation. He would just make sure he locked himself in his own room. Perhaps this would work.
He looked up at his coworkers. They were all looking at him, anxiously. He smiled weakly. "Fine," he consented. "I'll do it."
Hermione pulled the silk covers higher over her head when she heard the door open. She would never have thought Sirius would actually sleep in silk, but it was a comfort nonetheless. She didn't know why she had taken refuge in the ex-convict's bedroom. It shocked her how badly his death had affected her. Almost close to the change that had occurred since her parents' death. She had been up here crying for a good half hour. She didn't think anyone would come in here. For them, the grief was too near. For her, the grief was a comfort. Something to take her mind off a greater grief.
"Hermione?" questioned Remus' voice. He sounded pained. She mentally winced. She couldn't believe Remus had actually ventured in here. It must be killing him. Reluctantly, she sat up in the bed, letting the covers slide. She scrubbed hastily at her tear stained cheeks. She didn't look up at the man who had quickly become a comfort to her. She didn't really understand why she craved his comfort so much, but she knew he was all that was keeping her living for the moment. And how had she repaid him? By forcing him into a setting that screamed of the person he had so recently lost.
"I am so sorry," she mumbled. "I shouldn't have hid in here. I didn't think they would send you after me."
He crossed over and sat on the bed. "Come here, 'Mione," he sighed wearily. She allowed herself to sink into his welcoming arms. He gently rocked her back and forth making surprisingly calming shushing noise. "There, there. Its all right, its going to be all right." Before she could stop herself, the tears were falling again. She hoped they were silent, so perhaps he wouldn't notice them. Her hope was in vain. He loosened his grasp and tilted her face towards him. Gently, he brushed the tears away. "No more tears, Hermione. No more tears."
"I can't help it," she sobbed. "It hurts so much and there's nothing I can do to change it. I don't think I'll ever be happy again." With a cry, she flung herself at him yet again. He caught her and pressed her tightly into him. She inhaled deeply and took comfort in the woodsy smell that would be forever caught in his robes. His gentle rocking calmed her and she fell into a lull. None of the world existed. All there was in the entire world was herself, Remus and the rocking motion. She lost track of time until finally he brought her gently out of his arms and smiled wearily at her. 'He is always so tired,' she thought sadly. 'I wish I could help him as much as he is helping me.'
"What time is it?" she asked, her voice hoarse.
"Around ten o'clock or so," he reckoned. "I've completely forgotten to tell you what I came up here for, of course."
"What was it?" Hermione inquired, curiosity snared. At least that still remained about her. Curiosity killed the cat. She winced at the old saying. She never wanted to think about death or killing again, no matter how unlikely it was.
"How would you like to come and live with me until you go back to school?" he offered.
Her eyes widened. "Really?" she asked, what might have been joy flooding her.
"Really," he confirmed.
"I'd love to," Hermione grinned, her first true grin.
"Good," Remus smiled. "We'll leave in the morning. And that is that! You're very tired, I can see it in your eyes. Its time you were in bed."
"Can't I stay here?" Hermione begged.
Remus glanced around. Sirius' room was quite large and hung with a Gryffindor flag and the Irish quidditch team's banner. Sirius hadn't had a chance to redecorate the room he had secretly hoped to give to Harry, in time. He inhaled deeply. Damn it! The room even smelled of Sirius. "No," he finally disagreed. "No, I don't think that would be the best idea, Hermione. You're room from last summer will be better, don't you think?"
Hermione, understanding that Remus would be checking in on her that night, agreed readily. Any small grief she could relieve him of was worth sleeping in a room that did not hold the small comfort she got from being under Sirius' covers. She allowed Remus to lead her to her room. He waited outside while she changed into one of Tonks' nightgowns. Remus told her that Professor Vector would be going back to her house to pack up all her things. Vector would bring them by Remus the next afternoon. She let Remus in when she was ready.
He insisted on tucking her as though she were seven years old again. She didn't feel like admitting to herself that it was soothing. He smiled down at her warmly as he smoothed the covers under her chin. "All snug?" he inquired. She nodded. The bed was awfully comfortable, the covers warm and the pillows large.
"Remus," she said sleepily. "Are you sure you want me living with you? I...I know you are not very well off."
"Oh," he said, with a bit of a smile in his voice. "I wouldn't worry about that. I've just recently managed to secure a well-paying job, and I get money for working on the Order as well. Not to mention, you were your parents' heir. They left all of their money to you. We'll get along just fine."
"Where..." A yawn almost split Hermione's head in two and she could tell she was going to quickly fall asleep. "Where are you going to be working?"
"Shh," Remus soothed. "Go to sleep, 'Mione. We'll talk in the morning."
Hermione managed to answer him with a half smile before she fell soundly asleep. Her last sight was one of Remus, sitting on her bed, watching her anxiously.
Remus sighed somewhat happily and closed Hermione's bedroom door behind him. The entire experience had been rather gratifying. It was just like having the daughter he had always longed for and knew he would never have. Perhaps Dumbledore was right. Maybe things would work out between he and Hermione. He was about to head for his own room, when he heard a clatter from downstairs. He whipped out his wand and cautiously made his way to the head of the stairs. There was a light in the kitchen. He snarled. Were they never to have any peace? "Its a good thing this job pays well," he muttered to himself, sneaking silently downstairs.
He held his breath and quickly peeked into the kitchen. He let out a heavy sigh of relief. It was only Tonks. He stepped out of the shadows and into the kitchen. "Tonks, what are you doing?" he asked. "I thought you were a Death Eater or something!"
Tonks looked up from where she was filling a kettle with water. "Oh, sorry 'bout that," she grinned apologetically. "I couldn't sleep, so I figured I'd make some hot chocolate."
"You do realize that will make you even more wakeful?" Remus asked dryly. "Warm milk would be far better."
"Yea," admitted Tonks bashfully. "But hot chocolate tastes better. Besides, I put milk into my hot chocolate and it then becomes warm. Its the same thing...essentially."
"Essentially," snorted Remus. "Well, while you're at it, pour me some."
"Yes, Mr. Werewolf, sir," she saluted. Her shoulders shook with contained laughter.
Remus took a seat at the table and watched as she went about her work. She wore a very clinging nightgown under an open housecoat. Guiltily, he tried to stop his open admiration of her athletic body, but it was no use. He only hoped she was too busy or too naive to notice. "What are you laughing at?" he asked as she joined him at the table with two steaming mugs.
"You," she admitted, wrapping her fingers around the mug. "You're such a worry wart!"
"I am no such thing!" he protested.
"You are too," she argued. "Honestly! We're in what is possibly the most secure place in all of Europe, and you are worried about Death Eaters sneaking in and making a rucus...in the kitchen...with the lights on."
"I was being cautious," he frowned.
"Right," she said, rolling her eyes.
He chuckled. "Its what happens when you get old," he explained. "You start seeing shadows."
"Then whats your excuse?" Tonks inquired, eyes sparkling. "You're not old at all!" His heart ached. He could almost see Sirius sitting there laughing at him. Yet, it was different. There was something more about Tonks. Her lips were wet with hot chocolate. They seemed to be screaming for his touch. The nightgown was very revealing, almost inviting the way it molded itself to her hips. 'No, bad werewolf!' he snapped at himself. 'She's almost young enough to be your daughter! Stop having dirty thoughts!'
"Am too," he smiled, tearing his eyes away from her legs. He forced himself to look at her face. Not that it helped that much. She really was quite attractive. Her blue eyes seemed to stare straight into his soul. There was a light of knowing about them. 'She knows,' he thought desperately. 'Somehow she knows I want her...wait, I don't want her! Do I?' "Guess how old I am!" he challenged.
Tonks stood up and crossed over to him. She lifted up his head, laughing. He gulped. With him sitting and her standing, his head was in a very inappropriate place. Not that he minded. "Hmm, let me see," she mused, twisting a strand of his hair in her fingers. "I'd say thirty-six."
His breath had quickened and his body was reacting to her closeness again! "Thirty eight," replied Remus. "And how old are you, dear Nymphadora?"
"Twenty-five," she answered, smiling. "Thats only thirteen years, Remus. Not too much of a difference at all! I've dated guys twenty years older than myself. And don't call me Nymphadora!"
"Not too much?" repeated Remus. He couldn't help thinking the dating comment was supposed to be some sort of hint or something. "Are you mad?"
"No, not last time I checked," Tonks laughed. To Remus shock, she plopped herself down on his lap. Her eyes widened instantly and she almost leaped up, the state of his arousal shocking her. Remus caught her by the waist. She knew now, there was nothing he could do to hide that. Her flirtatious comments and actions had given him courage.
"I think I'm going to kiss you," he informed her, briskly. Her blue eyes widened alarmingly, but her soft lips smiled invitingly.
"I think I might like that," she mused. That was all he needed. He released her waist and cupped her chin. His lips were on hers and she was kissing him just as much as he was kissing her. They kissed deeply, longing and passion in every particle of their beings. Her tongue suddenly burst into his mouth, exploring his mouth. He let out a little moan and allowed his own tongue to wrestle with hers. Suddenly his brain started working again. He wrenched his lips away from hers and stood up, depositing her in a heap on the floor.
"Oh Gods, Tonks, I am so sorry," he apologized, face a brilliant red. "I...I had no right. I completely took advantage of you."
"Took advantage of me?" she practically squealed. "Are you crazy, Remus? I think I was kissing you right back, in case you didn't notice!"
"No, its...you're all torn up about Sirius. Don't you see?" Remus moaned. "You just want a replacement for him."
If it was possible, her blue eyes flared even larger. "Believe it or not, Lupin, the Black family may like marrying pure bloods, but we aren't in favour of incest!"
"No, I mean...I don't know what I mean," Remus admitted. "But, this...us, its not right."
"Thats not what your other head was saying," smirked Tonks. He gaped at her, shocked.
"And here I was thinking you were innocent," he mumbled. He raised his voice. "I'm terribly sorry if I've made you have feelings for me, Tonks. But werewolves and partners...they just don't go together. You may think you have feelings for me, but believe me. This is for the best."
"Remus, I-" she called after him. The door slammed shut behind him. She stayed on the floor, angry tears rolling down her flaring cheeks. "Damn you, werewolf!" she shouted, heedless of the many slumbering members of the Order currently in residence at the Manor. "Damn you," she repeated softer. 'He's right, you know,' said the smart part of her. 'Loving a werewolf? I can't imagine a worse idea!'
"Bit late for second thoughts," Tonks observed dryly.
Hermione picked away at her poached egg. She was too sad to eat. Everyone around her seemed to understand, as not even Molly Weasley prodded at her to 'eat up.' Most of the Order of the Phoenix was already out and about by nine o'clock in the morning. Molly was bustling around the kitchen, cleaning up the many pots, pans and plates needed to feed such a large group of people. Thankfully, with such a large family, Molly was very adept at feeding large groups of people.
Remus was sitting beside her, sipping at the last dregs of his morning cup of tea and frowning over the Daily Prophet. "What are you reading?" she asked, trying to sound interested.
"An editorial on how all werewolves should be prosecuted and sent to Azkaban," he said bitterly. The paper clenched in his bawled hands. Wisely, Hermione pried the paper away from him.
"Don't let it bother you, Remus," Amara Vector advised. "Its probably just some looney. No where near enough wizards agree with crap like that. Even if it did get past, Dumbledore would never let them take you."
"I know," Remus sighed. "Its the purpose of the matter."
"Don't worry about it," she said more firmly, patting his arm lightly. Hermione decided it was decidedly odd to see her Arithmacy teacher sitting at the kitchen table in a fuzzy blue robe, her hair in curlers and her feet warmed by fuzzy pink bunny slippers. Hermione had always thought Vector was an highly intellectual woman, but the article in Witch Weekly about young super singing sensation, Reginald Huliat, seemed to have intrigued her as much as it would have Lavender Brown or Pavarti Patil.
But even more odd, was the sight of Severus Snape at the far end of the table, munching away at the last pieces of his bacon, while reading Pride and Prejudice. Apparently, even wizards had a weakness for good Muggle literature. 'A student should never have to see her teachers in this close proximity,' Hermione thought with quite a lot of emotion. She doubted she would ever get over the sight of Snape coming downstairs with his robe undone, green boxers in plain view to the world. When he had realized she was there, he had quickly done it up, but still-!
The only other person in the kitchen was Tonks. She was completely immersed in her cereal and her copy of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them. Hagrid had reccomended it to her, and she seemed to be enjoying it. Hermione couldn't help but notice that she avoided looking at Remus. The few times she had, her face had turned a brilliant red. Remus stoically ignored her, but Hermione was certain he had noticed every last look. 'I wonder where Remus went after I fell asleep?' Hermione thought slyly. They were acting just like Ginny and Dean Thomas had after their first kiss. You would think adults could be a little more circumspect. She sighed a little. Even frivolous thoughts about her guardian couldn't distract her mind very long from her parents.
"Are you going to finish that, 'Mione?" Remus asked softly.
Hermione stared down at her egg. "No," she answered. "Sorry, I'm not very hungry." Molly was there almost instantly, scooping it up. Hermione looked up. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Weasley. I'm sure it was very good."
Molly turned and kissed the top of her head. "Don't you worry yourself, dear," she soothed. She scraped the egg into the garbage and glanced at the clock. It was identical to the one at the Burrow, only with quite a few more hands. Every single member of the Order of the Phoenix had a hand. The places were 'Home, Work, Manor, Danger, Outside, Traveling, The Ministry, Hogwarts, Mission, Mortal Peril,' and 'Captured.' Where the twelve should have been, was the word 'Deceased'. Every time she looked at it, Hermione's heart broke. Only one handle pointed there. "Sirius Black."
"You two had better get going," Molly advised. "Oh, Hermione, Ginny and Ron send their best wishes." Hermione winced, remembering how she had blown up at Ron the day before.
"Where are they?" she asked. Molly nodded at the clock. Ron and Ginny's handles pointed to 'Home.' At the Burrow then. "If it wouldn't be too much trouble, could you tell Ron that I'm very sorry?" Hermione asked.
"Of course," smiled Molly warmly.
"Ready, 'Mione?" Remus inquired.
"Yes, I think so," Hermione nodded. She sank into Remus arms.
"I'll see the two of you this afternoon," Vector smiled. "I'll bring all of your things, Hermione."
"Thank you," Hermione said.
"And I'll see you on the eighteenth, Remus," Snape said, not looking up. "With plenty of potion."
"Thank you, Severus," Remus said tightly. Hermione's lips twitched. He didn't have to sound as though the words were being ripped from him.
"Good bye, Hermione," Tonks said cheerfully. "Keep your chin up." Remus sighed quietly. Hermione didn't think anyone save herself had heard it. He obviously hadn't really expected a farewell.
He pointed his wand at himself, and they Disapparated...
...and Apparated outside a cozy cottage, almost hidden by the ivy that grew up along the walls. There was a white gate around the small property and a little stone path lead up to the door. The windows were all round and hung with white curtains. It was positively quaint. "Wow, Professor," Hermione marveled. "You really have done well for yourself!"
"Yes," Remus nodded happily. "Life is treating me surprisingly well. I owe it all to Dumbledore. And, please, call me Remus. Merlin! We're going to be living together after all!"
"Okay, okay. Its just a little odd, thats all. Did Professor Dumbledore find you your new job?" Hermione inquired.
"Yes, I suppose you could say that," agreed Remus, with a small smile. "Do you like it then?"
"I love it," declared Hermione, feeling almost happy.
Remus released her and linked arms with her. He swung open the gate. "Then lets truly go home!"
Author's Notes
cosmo-queen: Thanks for your review! Remus and Hermione are two of my three favourite characters, my other being Sirius Black. I hope you enjoy the rest of the story as well as you enjoyed the first chapter!
Christina: Thanks for your review! I will definitely keep writing it. I hate it when an author beings a story and then gives it up...though I'm afraid I do have a tendency to do so. I am really enjoying writing this story, so I think I am going to be able to complete it.
OneofaKind92: Thanks for your review! Anyone who reviews the latest chapter and I can access their email will be sent a update shout.
heart-on-her-sleeve: I think I got this up three days after the first chapter...that quick enough? LOL
madzie: Thanks for your review and the compliment on my writing style **blush** Although I don't have the entire story written, it is all planned up, so the new chapters will be up as soon as I can write them!
padfoot1975: Thanks for your review! I am not trying to make this story too angsty, but it will have its moments. Unfortunately, Sirius will be staying dead in this fic, as much as it pains me. However, he will appear in flashback scenes and he is incorporated in later, but I can't tell you how!
Nihtfyr: Thanks for your review! My name is actually Shawna, but your point was taken. I have this silly little thing where in every story I give myself a cameo. Showna Applegate was the cameo. She doesn't really come into the story, so don't worry about Mary Sues. Showna isn't a big enough part to be considered a Mary Sue...no romance and she might have twenty lines before all is said and done. I fixed the little grammatical error- thanks for pointing it out!
AprilSkrutin: Thanks for your review! Hope you enjoyed this part as well as the last!
JessicaBlack: Thanks for your review! Is three days soon enough for you? I am actually very happy at how quickly I updated. **beams proudly**
Silver/Jeniva: Thanks for your review! I am glad you like the characterization. I have had some problems with Remus, but I'm hoping I haven't completely botched him. Hope you enjoy this chapter!
Galea: Thanks for your review. As they are Death Eaters, one would think they might be 'meanies'. **rolls eyes at friend** Kudos to being the first reviewer though!