Disclaimer: Not mine.

Helpless 19

Coffee breaks

"I'm hungry," Paresu said, glancing at her watch. "How about joining me for an early lunch?"

Marron gave a guilty start. "Oh, I don't think I should. I should be getting back to the River Rat. After all, Mr. Briefs is paying me-"

"You have to eat lunch sometime. I assume Trunks gives you a lunch break?"

"Oh, yes." Marron hastily assured her. "Usually I fix lunch for both of us."

"Ah. I see. Well, it won't hurt Trunks to manage for himself for once."

Marron thought about the snooty redhead she'd met that morning and gave up the argument. "Well, he did have someone with him when I left."

Paresu nodded. "I thought so." She pushed back her chair and reached for her purse. "Come on, I know a great little coffeehouse just around the corner that has incredible desserts."

Marron followed her out, reflecting that Paresu didn't look as if she'd touched anything that contained calories in her entire life.

The coffeehouse turned out to be fairly quiet, probably because they were early, Paresu told Marron as they waited for their sandwich and coffee.

She seemed genuinely interested in Marron's background, and Marron found herself relaxing more and more. She told the attentive woman about her family and the neighborhood she'd left behind in Aquarius.

"You must be dreadfully lonely here," Paresu said when the waitress brought their order. "This is not a big city, but it's big enough to make it tough to meet people and make friends."

Marron shrugged. "I really haven't had the time to get that lonely. I've been busy working, and on weekends I've been exploring the city. There's lots to see and do here. Not like in Aquarius."

"And Trunks has kept you occupied these last couple of weeks, of course."

Marron looked down at her sandwich. "I guess so," she mumbled.

"Marron, there's something I think you should know."

Aware of a cautious note in Paresu's pleasant voice, Marron looked up again. "If you're going to tell me that Trunks could never be interested in someone like me," she said, lifting her chin, "I already know that. I'm not his type. Neither is he mine. I've already told you there's nothing like that between us."

Paresu nodded, her eyes warm with sympathy. "As you've said. But I can't help feeling that you wish things could be different."

Marron stared at her, too miserable to deny it any longer. "I've seen the kind of women Trunks likes. Look at me. I'd never be like them, no matter how hard I tried."

"You don't have to be like them," Paresu said gently. "From what Trunks tells me, you are a warm, generous, compassionate, terribly efficient woman and you should be very proud to be who you are."

Marron felt her cheeks growing warm. "Trunks told you all that?" She said in astonishment.

Paresu nodded. "He did indeed. He thinks very highly of you, Marron."

Marron studied her sandwich again. "But he doesn't think about me the way he thinks about his other women."

"It isn't you, Marron, believe me, and Trunks will never make a commitment of any kind to any woman. There have been a long line of women who've tried their best to tame him. Beautiful, clever, intelligent women who really know how to deal with a man like Trunks. He's rejected every one of them."

"But why?" Marron shook her head. "It's as if he's afraid of settling down with one woman."

Marron took another sip of her coffee and put down the cup. "I don't suppose I should be telling you this, but I think it might help you to understand. Trunks lost his entire family and everything he owned in a house fire when he was only nine years old. I don't think he's recovered from that."

Shock knifed through Marron's heart and she uttered a whimper of protest. "Oh no, how awful. Poor Trunks." That explained his odd expression whenever she mentioned her family. Her heart ached for him, both then and now.

"I believe he's deathly afraid of losing everything again," Paresu said quietly. "That's why he lives every moment as if it were his last. And that's why he can never let himself fall in love with any woman."

Marron felt like crying, for the little boy whose life was destroyed when he was so young, and for herself, for loving a man who could never accept what she longed to give.

"It's just a theory, of course." Paresu sighed. "Trunks doesn't usually talk about it. He mentioned it to me one night when he'd had a little too much to drink. He made me promise never to mention it again."

"I won't say anything," Marron said, feeling as if her heart were breaking in two. "I wouldn't do anything in the world that would hurt him."

"I know that. That's why I told you." Paresu leaned forward, a troubled look on her lovely face. "You're not like the rest of them, Marron. I have the feeling you truly care for Trunks. Not for what he has but who he is."

"So do you," Marron said with a tremulous smile.

"Perhaps, but I'm not in love with him."

"And I am," Marron said, realizing it was true. She had finally fallen in love. with the wrong man.

"I thought so." Paresu reached for Marron's hand and gave it a friendly squeeze. "I'm sorry, Marron. The trouble with Trunks is that he'll take dreadful risks with his life, but he won't risk his heart. It's a real shame. He needs someone stable and down-to-earth in his life. He needs someone like you."

Marron wasn't convinced of that. It would seem as if Trunks had everything he needed. He certainly seemed content enough and obviously he enjoyed his life the way it was. He'd found a way to deal with his past, and it worked for him.

She'd been very wrong to try to change him, she told herself as she drove back to the River Rat later. He couldn't change who he was, and she had no right to expect him to give up his lifestyle just because she disapproved of it. Now that she knew about his past, she could understand why he behaved the way he did.

Understanding him didn't help, however, when she returned to the houseboat and yet another angel of mercy opened the door to her.

The tall, willowy redhead looked Marron up and down, then apparently deciding she was no threat gave her a languid smile. "Can I help you? Did you want to see Trunks"

"I'm his temp," Marron said shortly, and marched through the kitchen to the living room. Trunks sat on the couch, looking a little disheveled, she noticed with a stab of pain.

No matter how badly she felt, however, she couldn't despise him for it. He couldn't help being the way he was. She understood that now.

"Where have you been?" He asked in a plaintive tone, as if he'd noticed she'd been gone for most of the morning. "I was beginning to worry about you."

The redhead wandered in and sank down next to Trunks, sitting as close to him as she could get without actually climbing into his lap.

Marron dumped the drawing board on the table. "Paresu took me to lunch."

"She did?" Trunks explained, sounding surprised. "I wonder why."

Marron lifted her chin. "This might come as a surprise to you, but some people actually enjoy my company."

She thought she saw a flash of pain in his eyes, but she was hurting too much to care. It was one thing to know about Trunks' relationships, it was quite another to be falling over them all day long.

Trunks looked uncomfortable. "This is Reena," he said, as if she could possibly care.

Reena flapped a hand in her direction. "I'm hungry," she complained.

Trunks looked hopefully at Marron.

She ignored him, and sat down at the table. She didn't mind cooking for him, but there was no way she was going to cook for his girlfriends. "There's plenty of food in the fridge," she said pointedly.

Trunks cleared his throat. "So what did Paresu have to say? Did she say anything about the new designs we sent her"

"Only that she'd received them. I think she wants to talk to you about them." She opened up the lid of the computer and switched it on. "If you have those specs for me I'll enter them on the file."

"Er.. I haven't had the time to work on them," Trunks said, rather apologetic.

Reena giggled. "I've been keeping him occupied, haven't I, honey?"

Marron carefully closed the computer lid again and stood. "Well, if you don't need me, I'd like to go home. I have a splitting headache."

"You should take something," Reena advised.

"Thank you," Marron said evenly. "I think I will."

Trunks looked concerned and, disentangling himself from Reena's arms, got to his feet. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." Marron nodded at Reena. "Nice to have met you."

"Oh, you too, honey," Reena sang. "I hope your headache goes away soon."

"Don't come to the door. I'll let myself out." Marron picked up her briefcase and headed for the kitchen. She heard Trunks say something behind her, but she didn't stop to hear what it was.

So this was what it was like to love a man, she thought as she drove herself home through the relentless rain. She had wondered so many times what it would be like to really be in love. No one told her that it would hurt so much, and that she would feel so miserable and hopeless.

She wished now that she had never set foot on the River Rat. She wished she'd never signed on with the Guardian Angels Agency. She wished she'd never left her home. She hated Pisces. She hated the rain. She hated herself.

She was in love with Trunks Briefs. And there wasn't one darn thing in the whole wide world that she could do about it.

Trunks closed the door behind Reena and breathed in a sigh of relief. He'd always known that most of the women in his life were shallow and materialistic, but he hadn't realized how much they irritated him until now.

He'd always accepted his friends as they were, neither questioning nor judging their values. But now he was beginning to wonder why he bothered to associate with people who wouldn't give him the time of day if he were poor and actually lived on the River Rat.

That's where Marron was so different. In fact, there were times when he suspected she'd like him a lot better if he weren't quite so successful. Or perhaps the word he was looking for was respect.

She certainly couldn't respect him now, he thought dismally. Not after the stunts he'd pulled lately. He grabbed the coffeepot and thrust it under the faucet. Watching the water gush noisily into the pot, he tried not to think about the hurt expression on Marron's face when she'd left.

He bitterly regretted his attempts to disillusion her. He should have told her the truth. Except that he wasn't sure what the truth was.

He could have told her he wasn't interested in her personally. But then that wasn't the truth either. That was the whole problem. He knew that if he ever let down his guard, he could be very serious about Marron.

There could be no casual relationship with her because she wasn't like the others. Marron made him feel warm inside. She turned the rain into liquid sunshine, and made the ramshackle River Rat feel like a home. He could feel comfortable with her, and infinitely content.

Then again, there were other times when she could excite him and set his very soul on fire, just by a look or a touch of her hand. And all that added up to trouble. It would be all too easy to forget his convictions, and do something stupid.

The cold rush of water pouring over his hand brought him back to earth with a start. He turned off the faucet and tipped the excess water out of the coffeepot. He was beginning to wish that Marron Chestnut had never walked into his life.

No matter what he did now, he'd end up hurting her. And in so doing, he was hurting himself. Unfortunately, there just didn't seem to be any way of avoiding it.

The best way to deal with the situation, he decided, was to make a clean break. It would be painful for both of them, but easier in the long run. He'd explain that he was a confirmed bachelor, that he didn't need a woman permanently in his life, and that while he cared for her a great deal, he could never give her what she needed most. a home and a family.

Having rehearsed the whole speech to his satisfaction, he put out the lights and did his best to fall asleep.