The Legend of Zelda:The Wind Wanker
Chapter 5: Barneyland
Disclamer: I no own Zelda! I no Own Metroid either (Yes a few characters come and make an appearance here too, and I do not own Starfox.
(At Hyrule... thing.)
King of Red Arwings: You're probably wondering where we are, aren't you?
Unfortunately, there is not enough time for me to explain it to you now. Once
you are able to strike down Ganon with the item you obtain in this castle, all
will be made clear to you. Trust in my words. See what awaits you in the
castle.
(Inside the basement of Hyrule... thing.)
(it's a black and white place with moblins and darknuts that have been frozen in time)
Link: this place sucks...
(Giant Disco Ball Drops from the ceilng of the castle and all sorts of disco lights come on... Kick ass Disco Music comes on)
Link: woah woah woah this is the best damn place in the entire game!!!
(all the enemies unfreeze)
Link: DO THE MONKEY WITH ME!!! COMEON!!!
(everybody does the monkey)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Majora's Mask: hi Cin I keel you?
Tetra: no
Majora's mask: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Majora's Mask: hi Cin I keel you?
Tetra: no
Majora's mask: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Tetra: Hi!!! Cin I keel you?
Majora's mask: no
Tetra: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Majora's Mask: hi Cin I keel you?
Tetra: no, In fact I'm going somewhere else so I can NOT HEAR YOU YA MOTHERFUCKER
Majora's mask: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
Tetra: HEY!!!
(entire party dies)
Tetra: Link you dumbfuck, your supposed to kill them not party with them...
Link: Fu-
Tetra: SHUT UP!!! And another thing... SOMEONE GET ME SOME PEANUT CHEESE BARS AND-
Random Moblin: nopeanutcheesebarsforyou!!! (Throws his spear at tetra)
(Tetra gets hit by spear and falls over as if dead.)
(few seconds of silence, then disco stuff starts back up)
everyone minus Tetra: PARTY!!!! (continues to party)
Tetra: This is just not my fucking day... *dies for the umpteenth time*
(Hyrule Castle- er Disco Hall after a day of non-stop partying)
Random Moblin: Hey mon joor not as lam as some of dese people say ya are mon.. jus what the fook is with dem ghuys anewheys?
Link: They're all assholes, what can I say. And what about gannon?
Random Moblin: Yeeh what aboot heim? He ghot eaten by da masta metroid mon!!!
Link: Masta Metroid?
Random Moblin: Yah I heerd he cam all da way ova from dat metroid Prame game Mon...
Link: oh him... how the hell does he manage to fit his fat ass inside that little island?
Random Moblin: me no kno mon. All I know iz dat we get ta do what we wanna mon!!!
Link: Well catch ya later man!
Random Moblin: cya mon!
King of Red Arwings: well time to go to fucked up fortress.
(Inside Fucked Up Fortress.)
King of Red Arwings: Metroid Prime has likely been made aware of our little incursion already, and we don't have shit.
Link: Ya know, this whole "Invade the Fucked Up fortress so we can save our sister so she can yell at us and make us look like assholes" thing is fucking bullshit. I say we fuck this and go right back to...
King of Red Arwings: yes?
Link: well... uhh... ANYPLACE BUT HERE!!!
King of Red Arwings: alighty... I Think I'll take you too... uh... butthole island...
Link: WHAT? NO!!!!!!
King of Red Arwings: Hahahaha that's what you get for turning my voice off!!!
Next time on Wind Wanker:
Laruto: SURE? YA WANT SURE GO WATCH THE NEWS! I'M JUST A GAYASS SAGE THAT SITS HERE FOR NO APPARENT REASON AND FILLS YOU WITH LAMEASS BULLSHIT.
--
Majora's Mask: DIE FIERCE DICK!!!
--
Medli: ...I love you.
--
All in the next Ghetto-Possessed chapter of wind wanker
Chapter 5: Barneyland
Disclamer: I no own Zelda! I no Own Metroid either (Yes a few characters come and make an appearance here too, and I do not own Starfox.
(At Hyrule... thing.)
King of Red Arwings: You're probably wondering where we are, aren't you?
Unfortunately, there is not enough time for me to explain it to you now. Once
you are able to strike down Ganon with the item you obtain in this castle, all
will be made clear to you. Trust in my words. See what awaits you in the
castle.
(Inside the basement of Hyrule... thing.)
(it's a black and white place with moblins and darknuts that have been frozen in time)
Link: this place sucks...
(Giant Disco Ball Drops from the ceilng of the castle and all sorts of disco lights come on... Kick ass Disco Music comes on)
Link: woah woah woah this is the best damn place in the entire game!!!
(all the enemies unfreeze)
Link: DO THE MONKEY WITH ME!!! COMEON!!!
(everybody does the monkey)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Majora's Mask: hi Cin I keel you?
Tetra: no
Majora's mask: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Majora's Mask: hi Cin I keel you?
Tetra: no
Majora's mask: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Tetra: Hi!!! Cin I keel you?
Majora's mask: no
Tetra: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
(Great Sea)
Majora's Mask: hi Cin I keel you?
Tetra: no, In fact I'm going somewhere else so I can NOT HEAR YOU YA MOTHERFUCKER
Majora's mask: You suck.
(Hyrule disco hall)
Everybody: PARTY!!!!
Tetra: HEY!!!
(entire party dies)
Tetra: Link you dumbfuck, your supposed to kill them not party with them...
Link: Fu-
Tetra: SHUT UP!!! And another thing... SOMEONE GET ME SOME PEANUT CHEESE BARS AND-
Random Moblin: nopeanutcheesebarsforyou!!! (Throws his spear at tetra)
(Tetra gets hit by spear and falls over as if dead.)
(few seconds of silence, then disco stuff starts back up)
everyone minus Tetra: PARTY!!!! (continues to party)
Tetra: This is just not my fucking day... *dies for the umpteenth time*
(Hyrule Castle- er Disco Hall after a day of non-stop partying)
Random Moblin: Hey mon joor not as lam as some of dese people say ya are mon.. jus what the fook is with dem ghuys anewheys?
Link: They're all assholes, what can I say. And what about gannon?
Random Moblin: Yeeh what aboot heim? He ghot eaten by da masta metroid mon!!!
Link: Masta Metroid?
Random Moblin: Yah I heerd he cam all da way ova from dat metroid Prame game Mon...
Link: oh him... how the hell does he manage to fit his fat ass inside that little island?
Random Moblin: me no kno mon. All I know iz dat we get ta do what we wanna mon!!!
Link: Well catch ya later man!
Random Moblin: cya mon!
King of Red Arwings: well time to go to fucked up fortress.
(Inside Fucked Up Fortress.)
King of Red Arwings: Metroid Prime has likely been made aware of our little incursion already, and we don't have shit.
Link: Ya know, this whole "Invade the Fucked Up fortress so we can save our sister so she can yell at us and make us look like assholes" thing is fucking bullshit. I say we fuck this and go right back to...
King of Red Arwings: yes?
Link: well... uhh... ANYPLACE BUT HERE!!!
King of Red Arwings: alighty... I Think I'll take you too... uh... butthole island...
Link: WHAT? NO!!!!!!
King of Red Arwings: Hahahaha that's what you get for turning my voice off!!!
Next time on Wind Wanker:
Laruto: SURE? YA WANT SURE GO WATCH THE NEWS! I'M JUST A GAYASS SAGE THAT SITS HERE FOR NO APPARENT REASON AND FILLS YOU WITH LAMEASS BULLSHIT.
--
Majora's Mask: DIE FIERCE DICK!!!
--
Medli: ...I love you.
--
All in the next Ghetto-Possessed chapter of wind wanker