Disclaimer: I don´t own neither the Matrix, nor the Merovingian.
I thought the Meronvingian is a bit neglected here on ff.net, so I decided to make a little fun of him ;-)
I don´t know yet if I should continue it, so please review!!
The very secret diary of Merovingian
Monday
Mon dieu, what a day!
Got up at 6.30 just to discover that Persephone had occupied the bathroom already.
Just like every day…
Had to wait two full hours till she left and I could take my shower.
I'm seriously pondering the idea of having my own bathroom because she used all of my cosmetics, again!
My precious H.Rubenstein mascara and my favourite hair gel!
Decided to have breakfast in restaurant.
Read through today's assignments.
Ordered Twin One (or is it Twin Two?) to fetch my suit from the dry-cleaners.
Ordered Twin Two (or is it Twin One?) to accompany Persephone on her shopping trip.
Am proud of myself to have them occupied, Twins always give me headache with that ´we are getting aggravated´ line.
Discovered funny looking Asian guy whose name I can't remember snickering at me.
Turned out I forgot to change my fluffy bunny slippers for real shoes.
Went down to the dungeons to tease stupid key maker.
Had to send Twin One (or is it Twin Two?) back to dry-cleaners. Didn't succeed in cleaning trousers properly.
Still lipstick on it!
Persephone returned from shopping trip with Twin Two (or is it Twin One?).
Almost felt hair turn grey as she handed me the bills.
If I would spend the same amount on wine my wife spends on clothes…
Alors, we could bathe in it, I suspect!
Dinner very boring today.
Therefore decided to send petite brunette at table No 17 a piece of chocolate cake.
Discovered funny looking Asian guy whose name I can't remember leering at Persephone's décolleté.
Watched out impatiently for results of famous chocolate cake.
What happened?
Stupid waiter mistook table numbers and delivered cake to table No 71.
To a woman with the looks and the age of the Oracle…
Was being chased through whole restaurant till Twin One (or is it Twin Two?) managed to knock her out.
Found Persephone nearly collapsing with laughter.
Suspect that she changed table numbers behind my back…
Returned to my private rooms to finish horrible evening with a glass of French wine and a nice porn magazine.
Found the secret box with selection of hustler and playboy empty.
Discovered instead a strand of white hair in it!
That is the third time Twin Two (or is it Twin One?) plundered my secret hideout!
Settled for a nice glass wine instead.
My precious Chateau Haut-Brion 1959! All gone!!
Funny looking Asian guy whose name I can't remember must have been at it again!!
Nom de Dieu de putain de bordel de merde de saloperies de connards d´enculés de ta mère!
Went to bed and wept silently in my pillows…
Mon dieu, what a day!