Kinie: Welcome to the final night of Whose Line is it Anyway, with the cast
of Trigun as the actors! Now, they've all provided us some great laughs,
but, since tonight's night is their last that they all will be together,
we've assembled a super-special cast of the best of the best, the worst of
the worst, and those that just shouldn't be here. So, here are our actors:
Vash, Zazie, Wolfwood, and Knives!
The four actors walk past the camera, and sit down in their respective seats.
Kinie: OK then, let's get this show started! The first game is called 'Two Line Vocabulary.' This is for Vash, Zazie, and Knives. In this game, Vash and Knives can only say two different lines. Vash, the two lines you can say are "When's lunch?" and "What the hell is that?" Knives, the two lines you can say are "That can't be good." And, "Who wants to die first?" Again, Zazie, you can say whatever you want. The scene is. **Looks at a piece of paper** Zazie, you are the captain of one of the SEEDs ships, and you suspect either Vash or Knives of trying to sabotage your landing procedures on a possible planet to colonize.
Zazie: OK, which one of you tried to sabotage the landing procedures of the SEEDs ship?
Vash: When's lunch?
Zazie: I'll give you lunch after I'm done talking to the two of you.
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, trust me; Talking is a good thing. Anyway. Out of all of the people on board, I've narrowed it down two the two of you. One of you is innocent; the other is a filthy, stinking liar that's tried to kill off humanity.
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, it isn't!
Vash: What the hell is that? **Points at the SEEDs ship. **
Zazie: That's the ship that we just got off of.
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: Yes, it is good. That' how we got here.
Knives: Who wants to die first? **Takes out a throwing star. **
Zazie: No one is going to die first, well, except maybe the sabouture. Wait a minute. The hydraulic line that controlled the landing mechanism was cut with something sharp. **Looks inquisitively at Knives. ** Was it you who cut the hydraulic line?
Knives: That can't be good.
Vash: When's lunch?
Zazie: No, cutting the hydraulic line is NOT a good thing, and I thought I told you that we are going to have lunch after this gets settled.
Suddenly, the SEEDs ship behind them starts on fire.
Vash: What the hell is that? **Points at the SEEDS ship. **
Zazie: Oh great, now we can't get off of this planet!
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, it isn't!
Vash: **Gets close to Zazie's ear, and whispers something into it. **
Zazie: No, we can't have lunch! Argh, I've had it with the both of you! **Takes out a gun. **
Vash: What the hell is that?
Zazie: It's a gun, and I'm going to shoot one of you. I don't know who, I'll just shoot one of you at random!
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, it isn't! **The gun floats out of his hand.** What the?
Knives: **Grabs the gun out of the air, and points it at the both of them.** Who wants to die first?
Kinie: **Hits buzzer.** Good job, guys! I'm giving each of you 1,000 points, and an extra 500 to Vash for making Zazie try to kill either one of them. Our next game is called, 'Scenes From a Hat!' This is for all four of you. I'm going to pick random scenes from this hat. **Reaches under desk, and pulls out a Black Mage hat.** And you have to act them out. The first scene is. **Reaches into hat, pulls out a piece of paper** OH, boy. The first scene is 'Kinie's Daily Planner.'
Zazie: Let's see. **Flips through imaginary book** 8 AM, Feed the animals. 9 AM, feed the prisoners.
Vash: Hmm. **Flips through another imaginary book** 12 PM, have lunch. 1 PM, torture random anime characters.
Knives: **Looks in imaginary book** 4 PM through 6 PM, watch Toonami. 6:30 PM, train the monkey ninjas.
Wolfwood: **Looks in imaginary book** 9 PM, Feed the prisoners. 11 PM through 12 AM, watch. Excel Saga and FLCL?
Kinie: **Hits the buzzer** Not bad, not bad. **Reaches into hat** 'People from webcomics you'd like to see get badly injured.'
Zazie: Black Mage, what have I told you about sticking forks into the electrical outlet.
Vash: I really hope Erika-San hurt that Bishounen Ed badly.
Knives: I hope Red Mage fails on his secondary rescue throw.
Wolfwood: May the evil kitty Belphegor be blasted to catnip hell from boo's chibi-catnip-shooting-bazooka!
Kinie: **hits the buzzer** Last one! I hope it's good! **Reaches into hat, and pulls out a piece of paper.** Yes! It is a good one!
Zazie: What is it?
Kinie: 'Anime/Manga/Video Game Character's Daily Planer!'
Zazie: Let's see. What do I do at 9 PM tonight. **Takes out imaginary planner** Oh yeah, I call out the sandworms.
Vash: Let's see. What is Knives' daily schedule? Hmm. **Flips through imaginary planner** 7 AM, kill humanity. 8 AM. kill humanity again. 8:30 AM, have breakfast.
Knives: Now, what has my friend Sephiroth planned for the humans on his planet? **Flips through imaginary planner** 9 AM. Wake up, have breakfast. 10 AM. Summon Meteor. 12 PM. Have lunch. 3:30 PM. Become Angel-Sephiroth. 5:30 PM. Ballerina lessons?
Wolfwood: Now, what has Kakashi planned for today? **Opens up imaginary planner** 7 AM. Wake up, have breakfast, and give ninjas-in-training their mission. 8:30 AM. Read 'IchaIcha Paradise!'. 1:30 PM. Read 'IchaIcha Paradise!' again.
Kinie: **Hits buzzer.** Great job, everyone! And, the winner of tonight's game is Wolfwood! So, while Wolfwood gets to relax in this chair, Vash, Knives, Zazie, and myself will have ourselves an old-fashioned hodown! What I need from the audience is a suggestion for a person's favorite job.
Audience member #1: MOVIE STAR!
Audience member #2: BEING BILL GATES!
Audience member #3: BEING A SUPERHERO!
Audience member #4: BEING IN AN ANIME SHOW!
Kinie: All excellent suggestions! OK people, you can do any of the four that were just yelled out by the audience! Wolfwood, hit the play button on the recording of the hodown music!
Wolfwood: **Hits play button on the stereo, which begins to blast out the hodown music.**
Vash: Oh how I wish I was Bill Gates, he's really cool. Because he's the richest dude in the entire world. OH how I'd use his money is no question, I'd bay off any bounty hunter out with a warrant for my head.
Kinie: Oh being a superhero is really cool. You get to fly around and around and save the whole world. But let me tell you something, listen up Jack. Never tell your nemesis where your weaknesses are at.
Knives: Being a movie star is a cool job. You get to entertain the people with this acting job. But being a movie star isn't all that great. You have to deal with rabid fans that try to trip you into going out on a date.
Zazie: Being in an anime show is really, really hard. You have no stunt doubles to play out the dangerous parts of the job. But watching an anime show is really really fun. Especially when the credits end with a ZakoZako Hour.
Everyone: WITH A ZAKOZAKO HOUR!
Kinie: Thank you everyone, and have a safe. Huh? Hey, what's with the earthquake? Wolfwood, what time is it?
Wolfwood: It's 9 PM.
Kinie: 9 PM.. Hmm.. Why is that such an important time that I should have remembered was going to happen at that time?
Suddenly, several sandworms pop out of the ground and begin to attack the fleeing audience.
Kinie: ZAZIE! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? YOU PROMISED NOT TO CALL OUT THE SANDWORMS!
Zazie: Umm. **Sweatdrops, then runs away**
Kinie: Get back here! **Chases after Zazie.**
As Kinie chases Zazie, a sandworm pops out from underneath Kinie. Kinie flies up into the air, and lands on top of the sandworm. He hangs on for dear life, when a sandworm eats the camera, cutting off the broadcast.
The four actors walk past the camera, and sit down in their respective seats.
Kinie: OK then, let's get this show started! The first game is called 'Two Line Vocabulary.' This is for Vash, Zazie, and Knives. In this game, Vash and Knives can only say two different lines. Vash, the two lines you can say are "When's lunch?" and "What the hell is that?" Knives, the two lines you can say are "That can't be good." And, "Who wants to die first?" Again, Zazie, you can say whatever you want. The scene is. **Looks at a piece of paper** Zazie, you are the captain of one of the SEEDs ships, and you suspect either Vash or Knives of trying to sabotage your landing procedures on a possible planet to colonize.
Zazie: OK, which one of you tried to sabotage the landing procedures of the SEEDs ship?
Vash: When's lunch?
Zazie: I'll give you lunch after I'm done talking to the two of you.
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, trust me; Talking is a good thing. Anyway. Out of all of the people on board, I've narrowed it down two the two of you. One of you is innocent; the other is a filthy, stinking liar that's tried to kill off humanity.
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, it isn't!
Vash: What the hell is that? **Points at the SEEDs ship. **
Zazie: That's the ship that we just got off of.
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: Yes, it is good. That' how we got here.
Knives: Who wants to die first? **Takes out a throwing star. **
Zazie: No one is going to die first, well, except maybe the sabouture. Wait a minute. The hydraulic line that controlled the landing mechanism was cut with something sharp. **Looks inquisitively at Knives. ** Was it you who cut the hydraulic line?
Knives: That can't be good.
Vash: When's lunch?
Zazie: No, cutting the hydraulic line is NOT a good thing, and I thought I told you that we are going to have lunch after this gets settled.
Suddenly, the SEEDs ship behind them starts on fire.
Vash: What the hell is that? **Points at the SEEDS ship. **
Zazie: Oh great, now we can't get off of this planet!
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, it isn't!
Vash: **Gets close to Zazie's ear, and whispers something into it. **
Zazie: No, we can't have lunch! Argh, I've had it with the both of you! **Takes out a gun. **
Vash: What the hell is that?
Zazie: It's a gun, and I'm going to shoot one of you. I don't know who, I'll just shoot one of you at random!
Knives: That can't be good.
Zazie: No, it isn't! **The gun floats out of his hand.** What the?
Knives: **Grabs the gun out of the air, and points it at the both of them.** Who wants to die first?
Kinie: **Hits buzzer.** Good job, guys! I'm giving each of you 1,000 points, and an extra 500 to Vash for making Zazie try to kill either one of them. Our next game is called, 'Scenes From a Hat!' This is for all four of you. I'm going to pick random scenes from this hat. **Reaches under desk, and pulls out a Black Mage hat.** And you have to act them out. The first scene is. **Reaches into hat, pulls out a piece of paper** OH, boy. The first scene is 'Kinie's Daily Planner.'
Zazie: Let's see. **Flips through imaginary book** 8 AM, Feed the animals. 9 AM, feed the prisoners.
Vash: Hmm. **Flips through another imaginary book** 12 PM, have lunch. 1 PM, torture random anime characters.
Knives: **Looks in imaginary book** 4 PM through 6 PM, watch Toonami. 6:30 PM, train the monkey ninjas.
Wolfwood: **Looks in imaginary book** 9 PM, Feed the prisoners. 11 PM through 12 AM, watch. Excel Saga and FLCL?
Kinie: **Hits the buzzer** Not bad, not bad. **Reaches into hat** 'People from webcomics you'd like to see get badly injured.'
Zazie: Black Mage, what have I told you about sticking forks into the electrical outlet.
Vash: I really hope Erika-San hurt that Bishounen Ed badly.
Knives: I hope Red Mage fails on his secondary rescue throw.
Wolfwood: May the evil kitty Belphegor be blasted to catnip hell from boo's chibi-catnip-shooting-bazooka!
Kinie: **hits the buzzer** Last one! I hope it's good! **Reaches into hat, and pulls out a piece of paper.** Yes! It is a good one!
Zazie: What is it?
Kinie: 'Anime/Manga/Video Game Character's Daily Planer!'
Zazie: Let's see. What do I do at 9 PM tonight. **Takes out imaginary planner** Oh yeah, I call out the sandworms.
Vash: Let's see. What is Knives' daily schedule? Hmm. **Flips through imaginary planner** 7 AM, kill humanity. 8 AM. kill humanity again. 8:30 AM, have breakfast.
Knives: Now, what has my friend Sephiroth planned for the humans on his planet? **Flips through imaginary planner** 9 AM. Wake up, have breakfast. 10 AM. Summon Meteor. 12 PM. Have lunch. 3:30 PM. Become Angel-Sephiroth. 5:30 PM. Ballerina lessons?
Wolfwood: Now, what has Kakashi planned for today? **Opens up imaginary planner** 7 AM. Wake up, have breakfast, and give ninjas-in-training their mission. 8:30 AM. Read 'IchaIcha Paradise!'. 1:30 PM. Read 'IchaIcha Paradise!' again.
Kinie: **Hits buzzer.** Great job, everyone! And, the winner of tonight's game is Wolfwood! So, while Wolfwood gets to relax in this chair, Vash, Knives, Zazie, and myself will have ourselves an old-fashioned hodown! What I need from the audience is a suggestion for a person's favorite job.
Audience member #1: MOVIE STAR!
Audience member #2: BEING BILL GATES!
Audience member #3: BEING A SUPERHERO!
Audience member #4: BEING IN AN ANIME SHOW!
Kinie: All excellent suggestions! OK people, you can do any of the four that were just yelled out by the audience! Wolfwood, hit the play button on the recording of the hodown music!
Wolfwood: **Hits play button on the stereo, which begins to blast out the hodown music.**
Vash: Oh how I wish I was Bill Gates, he's really cool. Because he's the richest dude in the entire world. OH how I'd use his money is no question, I'd bay off any bounty hunter out with a warrant for my head.
Kinie: Oh being a superhero is really cool. You get to fly around and around and save the whole world. But let me tell you something, listen up Jack. Never tell your nemesis where your weaknesses are at.
Knives: Being a movie star is a cool job. You get to entertain the people with this acting job. But being a movie star isn't all that great. You have to deal with rabid fans that try to trip you into going out on a date.
Zazie: Being in an anime show is really, really hard. You have no stunt doubles to play out the dangerous parts of the job. But watching an anime show is really really fun. Especially when the credits end with a ZakoZako Hour.
Everyone: WITH A ZAKOZAKO HOUR!
Kinie: Thank you everyone, and have a safe. Huh? Hey, what's with the earthquake? Wolfwood, what time is it?
Wolfwood: It's 9 PM.
Kinie: 9 PM.. Hmm.. Why is that such an important time that I should have remembered was going to happen at that time?
Suddenly, several sandworms pop out of the ground and begin to attack the fleeing audience.
Kinie: ZAZIE! WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU? YOU PROMISED NOT TO CALL OUT THE SANDWORMS!
Zazie: Umm. **Sweatdrops, then runs away**
Kinie: Get back here! **Chases after Zazie.**
As Kinie chases Zazie, a sandworm pops out from underneath Kinie. Kinie flies up into the air, and lands on top of the sandworm. He hangs on for dear life, when a sandworm eats the camera, cutting off the broadcast.