Chapter 17
"I love being home."
"I love you being home, too, Chris," Gordie replied. After about twelve cups of hot chocolate ("More, please, Justi." "What the hell am I, your SCULLERY MAID?"), the two boys were in an overly sentimental mood, curled up together on Gordie's living room sofa.
"They are so cute," Justi said to Teddy, grinning and pointing at them.
"Not as cute as Helen," Teddy replied, smirking.
"Another conquest, Teddy?" Gordie demanded. "God, how do you do it?"
Justi rolled her eyes, bored with the conversation before it began. "Hey, can we set up the tree now?"
"Yeah!" Teddy said, jumping up from his seat on the floor by the fireplace. "Tree tree tree tree TREE!"
Chris pulled himself lazily to his feet. "Yes, Gordie, that means moving," he said cheerfully when Gordie curled himself up and squeezed his eyes shut.
"Don't wanna move."
"Come on," Chris muttered, and stuck a hand out and tried to pull him up. "Oof!"
"Yeah, I'm heavier than I look, Chambers," Gordie said, managing to look sleepy and smug at the same time.
"I haven't worked out in a while-"
"Chris, cut the bullshit. You never work out," Gordie yawned from the couch.
"So you're saying I'm just naturally beautiful?" Chris said, laughing. But Gordie remained totally serious when he replied, "Yes. Yes I am."
"Oh, retch," Justi muttered. "Come on. Can we set up the tree now? Teddy's foaming at the mouth over here. . . "
"Teddy, I never realized you had so much Christmas spirit."
"I'm loaded with Christmas spirit."
"Then let's set up the tree!" Justi screamed. "Come on! That's the only reason I'm here! . . . I mean. . . "
Gordie rolled his eyes and got up. "Don't leave!"
"Chris, you dependant freak."
"Not dependant. Just comfortable."
Gordie scoffed and disappeared into the garage.
"You've taken my snugglebun," Chris said, looking over at the swinging garage door. "Justi, I HATE you."
"Chris, you're the gayest gay person I've ever met," Teddy commented lightly.
"I'm BACK!" Gordie said, dragging a box behind him just as the buzzer went off in the other room, signaling that a fresh batch of cookies was done. Teddy crossed the room enthusiastically, leaving Justi to go to the kitchen to retrieve the cookies.
"Yay!"
"See, Chris, Teddy loves my ass. Teddy's ALL ABOUT my ass."
"I like my asses feminine, thank you, not. . . searching for a word. . . oh yeah. Hairy. We all saw it that day with the leeches, Gordie."
Chris shook his head. "You shut up about my boyfriend's hairy ass."
"I am not hairy," Gordie said indignantly. "I have no idea what you're all talking about."
"We're talking about the fact that if you shaved your ass, you could make winter coats for all the starving people in Mongolia."
"Teddy!"
"Yeah, Teddy, shut up," Chris said, trying not to laugh. "He's not *that* hairy."
"I am not hairy at all! My ass resembles the white ball in pool."
Justi, who had just walked into the room with the cookies, let out a shriek. "WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT GORDIE'S BUTT?"
"That's my favorite topic," Teddy muttered dryly. "Believe me, Justi, you're not the only one not happy here."
"Chris is THRILLED to be discussing my derriere," Gordie said, with a wink.
"What the HELL is a derriere?"
"Teddy, what are we talking about?"
"Gordie's ass."
"That's a derriere."
"See, Lachance? Your ass is so messed up they made up a word for it."
Gordie opened his mouth, changed his mind, and closed it again. "Hey, let's set up the. . . uh. . . "
Chris turned his head to seek the source of Gordie's faltering. "Jesus Christ, Justi, you didn't. . . God."
The tree was stood up. Most of the branches were in the proper slots, and Justi was standing on the couch and jumping, holding the top of the tree, trying to set it on the oddly-shaped hunk of plastic posing as a tree.
"I didn't want to wait for you freaks to stop talking about Gordie's ass, so I decided to get a move on."
"Weirdo."
"Because I have Christmas spirit?"
"No, because you work like a little rodent."
"Little rodents get Pop-Tarts."
"We've got cookies."
Justi flushed. "Well, actually, we HAD cookies."
Gordie, Chris, and Teddy all looked at the tray full of crumbs and dropped their jaws.
"You ate them ALL?"
Justi put her hands on her hips defensively. "Come on now. There were only a dozen. Obviously it wouldn't have been enough for all of us!"
"You'd think by now we'd have learned not to leave her in charge of food," Teddy whispered to Chris, who just nodded, sick to his stomach at the thought of scarfing all that food.
"Teddy," Justi directed, her voice business-like, "put the top on the damned tree."
Teddy had to stand on his tip toes to do it, but the top of the tree was eventually settled into place.
"Hey, it's a tree!" Chris exclaimed.
"What the hell did you THINK it was?" Justi demanded.
"I dunno. . . a large flightless bird, maybe?"
Justi snarled. "Shut up. It'll look even more tree-like once I smooth all the branches."
And it did. After about five minutes, Justi had groomed the tree flawlessly. It looked exactly like the sort of the thing one might come across in a forest.
"Lights! Tinsel! Ornaments! NOW!"
"Gosh, I guess I never realized what an OBSESSIVE FREAK Justi is about things," Gordie commented to Chris as he pulled out a string of lights.
"No kidding," Chris agreed. "What a FREAK."
"If it weren't for me, you'd fall apart and die," Justi replied, only part of her face visible from behind an insanely large pile of tinsel.
"Would not," Chris replied, just as she 'accidentally' strangled him with a string of tinsel. "Actually, due to the fact that I would be able to breathe, I might even live longer."
"Doubtful."
"Unavoidable," Chris replied, and the string of tinsel around his neck was tightened. "I mean, of course not." The noose was released.
"Look, everyone, Gordie's a Christmas tree!" Teddy exclaimed, stepping back to admire his handiwork. Chris and Justi looked over to see Gordie resembling a multi-colored burrito.
"Teddy, can you get him OUT of that?"
"Probably not. That's about six strings of lights."
"Ordinarily, I wouldn't care, but we. . . we need them for the tree," Justi said to Teddy, gesturing helplessly.
"Must you constantly destroy my art?" Teddy demanded, yanking one strand off his friend's body.
"Generally, fine art doesn't involve human sacrifice," Gordie muttered, still completely unable to move.
"Gordie, shut up, or I won't untie you."
"We set up a kick-ass tree, don't we?" Justi said half an hour later. "Look at that, man."
It was a lovely tree, covered in shimmering lights and shiny tinsel. Bulbs and ornaments of all shapes, sizes, and colors winked at them, reflecting sparkles from the gleaming lights.
"We really do," Chris said, pulling Gordie closer to him. For the last ten minutes, the two had been sharing a cup of hot chocolate ("With mini marshmallows? I LOVE you!"), and while Justi was absolutely delighted by this "adorable display of affection", Teddy was, quite frankly, disgusted by any two people acting so "fucking weird displaying affection".
"Let's play outside!" Justi shouted, suddenly and out of the blue.
"What?" Chris and Gordie demanded, looking at her like she was out of her mind.
"I JUST got comfortable!" Chris added, and, as if to prove the point, Gordie snuggled into Chris's neck. "ASShole!"
"PLEASE?" Justi begged. "No one went outside with me at ALL this week! You guys OWE me!"
"We do not!"
"Yes you DO!"
They all sighed, unable to resist both Justi's pleading and their own temptations to go outside and act like a kid. Within five minutes, they were outside, in full winter gear.
"Ha!" Justi shouted into the night. "Look!" She piled snow onto Teddy. "I made a snow bra for Teddy! And he's a D-cup!"
"I've got a hell of a rack," Teddy observed profoundly, looking down at his chest.
"Snow boobs!" Justi cried enthusiastically.
"I've always wanted to see what Teddy looked like with snow boobs," Chris remarked dryly. "This is like some sort of dream."
"Too good to be true," Gordie agreed, barely even glancing up from his snowman.
"Hey, guys," Justi said, her voice suddenly serious and low, "look."
There was a figure coming up the lane. The Lachance house was the last on the street. No one ever came down this far unless they were heading to the Lachances'.
"I think it's Vern," she murmured.
"Oh, God," Teddy groaned. "In the house. Come on, dammit," he added, trying to drag Justi in.
"No, hang on," she said, brushing him off. "I want to hear what he has to say."
"WHY?" Chris demanded. "Why in the world. . . ?"
"Are you forgetting what he made you do to Gordie?" Teddy asked.
"Yeah, Gordie's part just isn't right anymore."
"Aaah!"
"HAIR! His HAIR part!" Chris screeched. "God, Justi."
Gordie flipped his head up, and for the first time, Justi noticed that his hair was parted to the opposite side. He flipped up his hair to show her a small white scar. "The hair won't part over the scar," he explained.
"He's getting closer," Chris muttered.
"Hey, guys!" As if on cue, Vern started yelling for them. "It's me!"
Justi elbowed Chris sharply. "Come ON," she whispered.
"Hey," she said, as they drew nearer to Vern. And finally, all five of them were standing face to face for the first time in over three months.
"I got something I'd like to say," Vern started.
"Really," Teddy said sarcastically.
"Teddy." Justi said the one word, but it shut Teddy up better than a thousand word reprimand could have.
"It's the day before Christmas Eve," Vern began again, glancing uneasily at Chris and Teddy. "I didn't want a Christmas to go by without. . . you know, without saying I was sorry."
"And. . . ?" Chris prompted.
"And. . . and I am. Sorry, that is."
"Sorry for WHAT?" Teddy asked pointedly.
Vern sighed, as if he didn't want to get into this. "Sorry for being a jealous boyfriend. Sorry for thinking things like I did. Sorry for acting on my feelings. Sorry for hurting all of you."
"Gordie's part isn't right anymore!" Teddy cried suddenly. "I didn't touch your. . . did I. . . ?" Vern asked, floundering. Gordie smiled. "No, Vern, he means my HAIR part." "Oh. I'm. . . I'm sorry about your part. I'm sorry, everyone." "Apology accepted," Justi said, drawing Vern into a hug and somehow managing to elbow Teddy at the same time. "Right?" she grunted to Teddy and Chris.
"Sure," they grumbled. "Whatever."
Gordie was the next to hug Vern. Teddy and Chris refrained, opting for a simple handshake.
"Hey, come help me with a snowman that'll kick Chris and Gordie's snowman's ASS," Justi said, gesturing to all the snow.
"Okay," Vern said timidly, following her.
"I don't LIKE this," Teddy said fiercely. "Why is he HERE? What is he DOING? I don't want him to hurt Justi!"
"I don't want him here either," Chris replied, matching the fire in Teddy's voice, his eyes burning. "This is trouble."
"Let's kick his ass," Teddy said, smacking a fist into the palm of his hand. "Wecould take him."
"No," Gordie said softly. "I mean, you can if you want to, but, Chris, I don't want you to."
"WHY?" Chris demanded.
"I dunno," Gordie said, shrugging. "I guess. . . I'm a pretty good judge of character most of the time. I just thought his apology was pretty sincere. . . I don't think he was half-assed about it. That's all."
"One chance," Teddy grunted. "And if he blows it with ANY of you. . . or me. . . he's SCREWED."
"AMEN," Chris agreed forcefully.
"Look!" Justi's cheerful voice pierced their conversation, and they all turned to look at a slightly misshapen snowman. "I mean, obviously he's got some disability that prevents him from running and playing with the other snowmen, but he could kick your snowman's ass."
"I'm sure," Chris said, smiling at her.
"He could!" Vern chimed in, and for a moment, it was the four boys again, twelve going on thirteen, down by the river, swapping smokes and telling stories. They all felt it, but each thought he was the only one. The little spark was back.
In the end, it was Teddy who bridged the awkward gap. "Hey, Vern," he began, slightly awkward. "Wanna see the Dance Of The Winged Tree Monkeys?"
End of Chapter 17
So, I accidentally deleted my file, so now I'm stuck rewriting all the chapters I was going to post. The next chapter will probably be up by Saturday at noon or so, and I'll probably get nineteen up by Saturday night. Sunday night should see twenty. If all goes well.
Does anyone see Teddy and Justi?
Anyone?
Muchas Heartas!
"I love being home."
"I love you being home, too, Chris," Gordie replied. After about twelve cups of hot chocolate ("More, please, Justi." "What the hell am I, your SCULLERY MAID?"), the two boys were in an overly sentimental mood, curled up together on Gordie's living room sofa.
"They are so cute," Justi said to Teddy, grinning and pointing at them.
"Not as cute as Helen," Teddy replied, smirking.
"Another conquest, Teddy?" Gordie demanded. "God, how do you do it?"
Justi rolled her eyes, bored with the conversation before it began. "Hey, can we set up the tree now?"
"Yeah!" Teddy said, jumping up from his seat on the floor by the fireplace. "Tree tree tree tree TREE!"
Chris pulled himself lazily to his feet. "Yes, Gordie, that means moving," he said cheerfully when Gordie curled himself up and squeezed his eyes shut.
"Don't wanna move."
"Come on," Chris muttered, and stuck a hand out and tried to pull him up. "Oof!"
"Yeah, I'm heavier than I look, Chambers," Gordie said, managing to look sleepy and smug at the same time.
"I haven't worked out in a while-"
"Chris, cut the bullshit. You never work out," Gordie yawned from the couch.
"So you're saying I'm just naturally beautiful?" Chris said, laughing. But Gordie remained totally serious when he replied, "Yes. Yes I am."
"Oh, retch," Justi muttered. "Come on. Can we set up the tree now? Teddy's foaming at the mouth over here. . . "
"Teddy, I never realized you had so much Christmas spirit."
"I'm loaded with Christmas spirit."
"Then let's set up the tree!" Justi screamed. "Come on! That's the only reason I'm here! . . . I mean. . . "
Gordie rolled his eyes and got up. "Don't leave!"
"Chris, you dependant freak."
"Not dependant. Just comfortable."
Gordie scoffed and disappeared into the garage.
"You've taken my snugglebun," Chris said, looking over at the swinging garage door. "Justi, I HATE you."
"Chris, you're the gayest gay person I've ever met," Teddy commented lightly.
"I'm BACK!" Gordie said, dragging a box behind him just as the buzzer went off in the other room, signaling that a fresh batch of cookies was done. Teddy crossed the room enthusiastically, leaving Justi to go to the kitchen to retrieve the cookies.
"Yay!"
"See, Chris, Teddy loves my ass. Teddy's ALL ABOUT my ass."
"I like my asses feminine, thank you, not. . . searching for a word. . . oh yeah. Hairy. We all saw it that day with the leeches, Gordie."
Chris shook his head. "You shut up about my boyfriend's hairy ass."
"I am not hairy," Gordie said indignantly. "I have no idea what you're all talking about."
"We're talking about the fact that if you shaved your ass, you could make winter coats for all the starving people in Mongolia."
"Teddy!"
"Yeah, Teddy, shut up," Chris said, trying not to laugh. "He's not *that* hairy."
"I am not hairy at all! My ass resembles the white ball in pool."
Justi, who had just walked into the room with the cookies, let out a shriek. "WHY ARE WE TALKING ABOUT GORDIE'S BUTT?"
"That's my favorite topic," Teddy muttered dryly. "Believe me, Justi, you're not the only one not happy here."
"Chris is THRILLED to be discussing my derriere," Gordie said, with a wink.
"What the HELL is a derriere?"
"Teddy, what are we talking about?"
"Gordie's ass."
"That's a derriere."
"See, Lachance? Your ass is so messed up they made up a word for it."
Gordie opened his mouth, changed his mind, and closed it again. "Hey, let's set up the. . . uh. . . "
Chris turned his head to seek the source of Gordie's faltering. "Jesus Christ, Justi, you didn't. . . God."
The tree was stood up. Most of the branches were in the proper slots, and Justi was standing on the couch and jumping, holding the top of the tree, trying to set it on the oddly-shaped hunk of plastic posing as a tree.
"I didn't want to wait for you freaks to stop talking about Gordie's ass, so I decided to get a move on."
"Weirdo."
"Because I have Christmas spirit?"
"No, because you work like a little rodent."
"Little rodents get Pop-Tarts."
"We've got cookies."
Justi flushed. "Well, actually, we HAD cookies."
Gordie, Chris, and Teddy all looked at the tray full of crumbs and dropped their jaws.
"You ate them ALL?"
Justi put her hands on her hips defensively. "Come on now. There were only a dozen. Obviously it wouldn't have been enough for all of us!"
"You'd think by now we'd have learned not to leave her in charge of food," Teddy whispered to Chris, who just nodded, sick to his stomach at the thought of scarfing all that food.
"Teddy," Justi directed, her voice business-like, "put the top on the damned tree."
Teddy had to stand on his tip toes to do it, but the top of the tree was eventually settled into place.
"Hey, it's a tree!" Chris exclaimed.
"What the hell did you THINK it was?" Justi demanded.
"I dunno. . . a large flightless bird, maybe?"
Justi snarled. "Shut up. It'll look even more tree-like once I smooth all the branches."
And it did. After about five minutes, Justi had groomed the tree flawlessly. It looked exactly like the sort of the thing one might come across in a forest.
"Lights! Tinsel! Ornaments! NOW!"
"Gosh, I guess I never realized what an OBSESSIVE FREAK Justi is about things," Gordie commented to Chris as he pulled out a string of lights.
"No kidding," Chris agreed. "What a FREAK."
"If it weren't for me, you'd fall apart and die," Justi replied, only part of her face visible from behind an insanely large pile of tinsel.
"Would not," Chris replied, just as she 'accidentally' strangled him with a string of tinsel. "Actually, due to the fact that I would be able to breathe, I might even live longer."
"Doubtful."
"Unavoidable," Chris replied, and the string of tinsel around his neck was tightened. "I mean, of course not." The noose was released.
"Look, everyone, Gordie's a Christmas tree!" Teddy exclaimed, stepping back to admire his handiwork. Chris and Justi looked over to see Gordie resembling a multi-colored burrito.
"Teddy, can you get him OUT of that?"
"Probably not. That's about six strings of lights."
"Ordinarily, I wouldn't care, but we. . . we need them for the tree," Justi said to Teddy, gesturing helplessly.
"Must you constantly destroy my art?" Teddy demanded, yanking one strand off his friend's body.
"Generally, fine art doesn't involve human sacrifice," Gordie muttered, still completely unable to move.
"Gordie, shut up, or I won't untie you."
"We set up a kick-ass tree, don't we?" Justi said half an hour later. "Look at that, man."
It was a lovely tree, covered in shimmering lights and shiny tinsel. Bulbs and ornaments of all shapes, sizes, and colors winked at them, reflecting sparkles from the gleaming lights.
"We really do," Chris said, pulling Gordie closer to him. For the last ten minutes, the two had been sharing a cup of hot chocolate ("With mini marshmallows? I LOVE you!"), and while Justi was absolutely delighted by this "adorable display of affection", Teddy was, quite frankly, disgusted by any two people acting so "fucking weird displaying affection".
"Let's play outside!" Justi shouted, suddenly and out of the blue.
"What?" Chris and Gordie demanded, looking at her like she was out of her mind.
"I JUST got comfortable!" Chris added, and, as if to prove the point, Gordie snuggled into Chris's neck. "ASShole!"
"PLEASE?" Justi begged. "No one went outside with me at ALL this week! You guys OWE me!"
"We do not!"
"Yes you DO!"
They all sighed, unable to resist both Justi's pleading and their own temptations to go outside and act like a kid. Within five minutes, they were outside, in full winter gear.
"Ha!" Justi shouted into the night. "Look!" She piled snow onto Teddy. "I made a snow bra for Teddy! And he's a D-cup!"
"I've got a hell of a rack," Teddy observed profoundly, looking down at his chest.
"Snow boobs!" Justi cried enthusiastically.
"I've always wanted to see what Teddy looked like with snow boobs," Chris remarked dryly. "This is like some sort of dream."
"Too good to be true," Gordie agreed, barely even glancing up from his snowman.
"Hey, guys," Justi said, her voice suddenly serious and low, "look."
There was a figure coming up the lane. The Lachance house was the last on the street. No one ever came down this far unless they were heading to the Lachances'.
"I think it's Vern," she murmured.
"Oh, God," Teddy groaned. "In the house. Come on, dammit," he added, trying to drag Justi in.
"No, hang on," she said, brushing him off. "I want to hear what he has to say."
"WHY?" Chris demanded. "Why in the world. . . ?"
"Are you forgetting what he made you do to Gordie?" Teddy asked.
"Yeah, Gordie's part just isn't right anymore."
"Aaah!"
"HAIR! His HAIR part!" Chris screeched. "God, Justi."
Gordie flipped his head up, and for the first time, Justi noticed that his hair was parted to the opposite side. He flipped up his hair to show her a small white scar. "The hair won't part over the scar," he explained.
"He's getting closer," Chris muttered.
"Hey, guys!" As if on cue, Vern started yelling for them. "It's me!"
Justi elbowed Chris sharply. "Come ON," she whispered.
"Hey," she said, as they drew nearer to Vern. And finally, all five of them were standing face to face for the first time in over three months.
"I got something I'd like to say," Vern started.
"Really," Teddy said sarcastically.
"Teddy." Justi said the one word, but it shut Teddy up better than a thousand word reprimand could have.
"It's the day before Christmas Eve," Vern began again, glancing uneasily at Chris and Teddy. "I didn't want a Christmas to go by without. . . you know, without saying I was sorry."
"And. . . ?" Chris prompted.
"And. . . and I am. Sorry, that is."
"Sorry for WHAT?" Teddy asked pointedly.
Vern sighed, as if he didn't want to get into this. "Sorry for being a jealous boyfriend. Sorry for thinking things like I did. Sorry for acting on my feelings. Sorry for hurting all of you."
"Gordie's part isn't right anymore!" Teddy cried suddenly. "I didn't touch your. . . did I. . . ?" Vern asked, floundering. Gordie smiled. "No, Vern, he means my HAIR part." "Oh. I'm. . . I'm sorry about your part. I'm sorry, everyone." "Apology accepted," Justi said, drawing Vern into a hug and somehow managing to elbow Teddy at the same time. "Right?" she grunted to Teddy and Chris.
"Sure," they grumbled. "Whatever."
Gordie was the next to hug Vern. Teddy and Chris refrained, opting for a simple handshake.
"Hey, come help me with a snowman that'll kick Chris and Gordie's snowman's ASS," Justi said, gesturing to all the snow.
"Okay," Vern said timidly, following her.
"I don't LIKE this," Teddy said fiercely. "Why is he HERE? What is he DOING? I don't want him to hurt Justi!"
"I don't want him here either," Chris replied, matching the fire in Teddy's voice, his eyes burning. "This is trouble."
"Let's kick his ass," Teddy said, smacking a fist into the palm of his hand. "Wecould take him."
"No," Gordie said softly. "I mean, you can if you want to, but, Chris, I don't want you to."
"WHY?" Chris demanded.
"I dunno," Gordie said, shrugging. "I guess. . . I'm a pretty good judge of character most of the time. I just thought his apology was pretty sincere. . . I don't think he was half-assed about it. That's all."
"One chance," Teddy grunted. "And if he blows it with ANY of you. . . or me. . . he's SCREWED."
"AMEN," Chris agreed forcefully.
"Look!" Justi's cheerful voice pierced their conversation, and they all turned to look at a slightly misshapen snowman. "I mean, obviously he's got some disability that prevents him from running and playing with the other snowmen, but he could kick your snowman's ass."
"I'm sure," Chris said, smiling at her.
"He could!" Vern chimed in, and for a moment, it was the four boys again, twelve going on thirteen, down by the river, swapping smokes and telling stories. They all felt it, but each thought he was the only one. The little spark was back.
In the end, it was Teddy who bridged the awkward gap. "Hey, Vern," he began, slightly awkward. "Wanna see the Dance Of The Winged Tree Monkeys?"
End of Chapter 17
So, I accidentally deleted my file, so now I'm stuck rewriting all the chapters I was going to post. The next chapter will probably be up by Saturday at noon or so, and I'll probably get nineteen up by Saturday night. Sunday night should see twenty. If all goes well.
Does anyone see Teddy and Justi?
Anyone?
Muchas Heartas!