A/N: Wow. It took me two days to update. Probably no one noticed...
Phil: Uh...guess again... *points out of window*
Yoshimi: *looks outside. Outside, there is a large group of people armed with various weapons* What in Weyard...?
Angry Reviewer 1: You took too long!
Yoshimi: @_@ Hey, I only took two days! Most authors take a lot longer than that!
Angry Reviewer 2: You've spoiled us with the daily updates.
Yoshimi: Help!
&&&
Midnight C -- I didn't notice right away, but then when I wrote it enough, I thought, 'That can't be right, it looks too close to...that other word.' However, the clincher was when I made a typing error and wrote the "other word" by accident. Also, Crystal was an inspiration when I created Joe...Not that I like it, though...
Uniswift87 -- Thank you! I will be doing The Lost Age, but it will take a while, because, first I'm going to finish the game, and then start a new file to find the reports.
Vyctori -- Yes, the Stricken group are all becoming regulars. I just wanted to write them in the Bilibin Barricade part, but then, I couldn't get rid of them! I wrote the monks in with such dirty mouths because they are monks, and they're supposed to act the opposite. Also, I had just been continuing to make them angrier until they began to swear.
Akachi -- My reviewers are dropping like flies! I'm sure my muses will torture me sometime; they're probably just getting warmed up!
Wilhelmina: ^_^ You'd better believe it!
Yoshimi: Good luck with your new muse! I hope it will be more civil towards you!
Shiro Amayagi -- Yes, sugar-high Ringwraiths...oh, dear...
Joe: *runs into wall* *bounces off* Fwee! ^_^
Yoshimi: "1 w1ll l33+ 0wnz0r d4 cr1m1n4l"? I'm sorry, I don't understand. And, I will continue!
Angry Rabble: You'd better!
Yoshimi: Eep! I'm going, I'm going!
wolfy -- Thank you! As always, I'm continuing!
White_Mage -- Thanks! I enjoyed writing the Fuchin Temple part. I just made it get more and more ridiculous. Probably, I could have continued until it looked something like: NOTICE - *blee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-ee-eeep! ~Fuchin Temple Monks. Of course, I tried to restrain myself.
Empress Dotdotdot -- *takes cookies* Aye-aye, ma'am! *salutes* *drops cookies* Oops!
Joe: Hmm? What's this? *grabs cookies*
Yoshimi: Nooooooooooooooooooo!
Joe: COOKIES!
Phil: No! We just got him to start to calm down!
Joe: FWEE!
Yoshimi: Er...eh, heh...sorry...Anyway, thanks for the idea; I hadn't thought of that...Stop the presses! We've got a new story!
Taiga -- Opinion differs on who is more evil: the Ringwraiths shown in the movie, or my Ringwraiths. I support the idea that my Ringwraiths are more evil, but I doubt I'd want to live with the other Ringwraiths either! I put in a bleeper because A) I hate swearwords and B) I wouldn't know enough for the Fuchin Temple Monks dirty mouths. P.S. You'll have to mail Tret about that one. See how much of a panic you can make in the mail delivery service by marking a letter, Tret, Kolima Forest, Angara, Weyard or something similar!
Veilius -- Ack! Exclamation marks are contagious! You contaminated me! Well, of course the Fuchin Temple Monks are dirty-mouthed! It was hard on them, but the truth had to be known! Well, living with Ringwraiths isn't as bad as one would suspect, but it's quite a bit worse than living with no Ringwraiths! No! More exclamation marks! Help me!
&&&
Yoshimi: Now the disclaimer...
Angry Rabble: *bleep* *bleep* Weyard Weekly!
Yoshimi: Any monks with you?
Fuchin Monk 1: Yup! We're *bleep*ing mad that you've ruined our reputation for all time! *bleep* *bleep-bleep*
Yoshimi: Disclaimer, please!
Charlie: THE DISCLAIMER -- Yoshimi doesn't own Golden Sun, Ringwraiths, Angry Rabble, environmentalists, Angry Reviewers 1 through 6, Apes, monks, bleeps, the Save the Apes campaign, Temples, Empress Dotdotdot, travellers, the phrase "YAHH!", hysterical laughter, Xian residents, Random Reporter, journalists, newspapers, headlines, Two Detectives, Maxor, the short blond boy, Lama Temple, Agony Aunts, the Silk Road, merchants, warrior skills, deserts, seas, large rewards, Kalay, or Tolbi.
Yoshimi: ^_^0 So don't sue me!
***
Environmentalists Complain To Fuchin Temple
FUCHIN TEMPLE- Environmentalists today arrived at Fuchin Temple in order to complain about maltreatment to the resident Apes in Mogall Forest.
"These monks have helped four evil people harass the Apes that live in Mogall Forest!" an environmentalist told us. "Save the Apes!"
A rebuke from the Fuchin Temple Monks came. "*bleep* you *bleep*ing environmentalists! We didn't *bleep*in' tell the four *bleep*ing travellers to *bleep* the *bleep*ing Apes! So *bleep* off!"
Nyumpa made a calmer statement. "..."
After long argument, the environmentalist left to try to find the four travellers.
"Good riddance!" a monk was heard to say. "How the *bleep* can we reach *bleep*in' enlightenment with all kinds of *bleep*in' nuisances coming to our *bleep*ing Temple!"
Thanks to our friend, Empress Dotdotdot, who found the story happening and called a reporter!
Thieves Caught In Xian
XIAN -- A few thieves had come through Mogall Forest in two groups. The first group of thieves (who refuse to say their names) came into town to try to steal things, but they were stopped by Master Feh. An eyewitness told us that Master Feh just had to say "YAHHH!", and the thieves fell over from hysterical laughter, allowing them to be apprehended.
The second group was smarter. The four minors that have been covered in the news recently, visited and made friends with Master Feh and his daughter, Feizhi. Later on, though, after going through Altin and stealing from some ruins deep within the mine, they came back. According to one Xian resident, the red-haired male guarded the door, while some short blond boy closed his eyes and appeared to concentrate. He then told the two others, a taller blond male and a blue-haired female, where the loot was stashed. The two then swiftly grabbed all the items and hid them on their person. They left, at that point, and systematically entered the next house. The police were called, but the thieves slipped out.
More news as the story develops.
Thanks to Maxor for discovering the thief's accomplice [the short blond boy's] part in the theft!
Agony Aunt: Auntie Dora
Dear Auntie Dora,
We've made our way through Mogall Forest (that was a nightmare), but we're stuck near Lamakan Desert. We've started meditating at Lama Temple to learn Reveal, but it appears it's going to take a while. Any desert crossing suggestions?
From, Love Stricken from Bilibin, Love Stricken from Imil, and Also Love Stricken from Imil
Dear the Stricken group,
...Persistent, aren't you? You could ask Master Hama to help you, but I don't know about crossing deserts. Remember, patience is a virtue!
--Auntie Dora
Dear Auntie Dora,
My long-lost brother has arrived at Lama Temple. I know he's on a journey to save the world, but I wish I could tell him the truth. However, he might be tempted to stay with me. What should I do?
From, Unsure from Lama Temple
Dear Unsure from Lama Temple,
I think you ought to tell him the truth. An extra Jupiter Adept wouldn't go amiss in a quest to save the world. Oh, and Master Hama? There are three people in your temple who might want some help in desert crossing, so if you're going to follow your brother, take them with you.
--Auntie Dora
Classified
WANTED- Brave merchant to go on Silk Road. Warrior skills a plus, but mainly brave. Must be willing to cross way too hot desert and fight many powerful monsters. Large rewards. If willing, contact Kalay.
WANTED- Brave merchant to go on Silk Road. Warrior skills a plus, but mainly brave. Must be willing to cross monster-filled sea. Large rewards. If willing, contact Tolbi.
NOTICE- Random Reporter and Two Detectives looking for new line of work. Safety is a must. Must be so safe that nothing bad could happen. Contact Random Reporter and Two Detectives in Bilibin.
***
Yoshimi: So, now I'm stuck in my house with several Ringwraiths, including one on a sugar high...
Joe: ^_^ Fwee!
Yoshimi: Yeah, yeah, very nice...Anyway, at least the reviewers will have trouble getting past my muses!
Angry Reviewer 4: Guess again!
Richard: Hey, what happened to Angry Reviewer 3?
Angry Reviewer 2: He's around here somewhere...
Angry Reviewer 4: Ahem! What we were about to say is that we've brought help! Tada!
*Angry Rabble steps aside to reveal...all the Adepts!*
Yoshimi: Eep! What are they doing here?
Isaac: I want revenge for the "underwear incident" and the sullying of my name by calling me a thief!
Yoshimi: I speak nothing but the truth!
Saturos: Yeah, right, like I'd say that I lost to a lighthouse!
Yoshimi: You did! Just play Golden Sun! You say, "Me? Beaten? Never! I lost to this lighthouse, not to you!"
Saturos: ...You don't say.
Angry Reviewer 1: That's beside the point! You still were late!
Love Stricken from Bilibin: Well, anyway, he will give other Mia lovers space in a story, besides Isaac, without making them evil, despite him being a Mudshipper.
Yoshimi: ^_^ At least I still have my loyal fans...all three of them...Well, my staff at Weyard Weekly will support me!
Staff: No way!
Random Reporter: I'm going to quit Weyard Weekly! You got me turned into a tree!
Two Random Detectives: You tell him!
Random Traveller: You aren't going to rule over us anymore! We will send you down!
Charlie: ...Wait a second, I think I found a loophole!
Yoshimi: Tell me!
Charlie: Well, the Angry Reviewers want to make you write more often, but the people you've tortured in Weyard Weekly want to stop you, so...
Angry Reviewer 2: What?
Angry Reviewer 6: You mean, our allies are actually on the other side...
Phil: Now, where did Angry Reviewer 5 go?
Angry Reviewer 5: Present!
Angry Reviewer 1: Sooooo...
Angry Rabble: *turn to look at Adepts and other angry people from Weyard*
Garet: Uh, oh...
Jenna: Um, they're all lies! You wouldn't believe him, would you?
Angry Rabble: *draw weapons and slowly advance*
Adepts: Eep!
Yoshimi: And remember, Angry Rabble, review once you're done!
Angry Rabble: *nod* *attack Adepts*
Adepts: Argh! *cast various Psynergy*
Phil: Ooh, aren't the lights pretty?
Yoshimi: ^_^0 ...whatever.