Chappie 4
Oh, ph33r me. It's been...three months. I am such a dumbass. -_-; I feel sad for myself. Had summer school, rented FFX, had summer band... Going to PA tomorrow, so HAD to get this chappie out. Also, been playing Sims like mad (just finished the Peacecraft house, consisting of Relena, Dorothy, Noin, and Sally :D Yuuuuuuuri!) and Heero is now a 6th level hacker. ^^ Huzzah!
Oh, and X_x ARGH! Apologies for any of you who were like 'o.o Hey, she actually updated! *click*' or 'Hm, this looks interesting...' and either noticed that the first chapter was, in fact, the third, or that this chapter kept screwing up. -_-;;;;; ARGH. Hopefully this will be fixed. ^^;
Disclaimer: *long, tired sigh* I don't own Gundam Wing... I don't own Heero, or Duo, or even dear Wuffers... I don't own shounen ai; I don't own Outlook Express... I own the lovely lil cafe mentioned in here, though, and I own the girl at the hotel (ehehe.. Gomen, but technically... She's me ^^; I needed a chara for it...) Even at my birthday party (In which I got 2 Chobits, Love Hina Vol.4, and GW Blind Target (Which I'll discuss at the end of the chapter ._.;), doubling my manga collection :D) I didn't receive any of the aforementioned. *sigh* Life sucks, ne?
Warnings: Let's state the obvious, shall we? ^_^; This fanficcie has shounen ai. Amazing, ne? That means... *drumroll* Two guys, who are in love! :D:D GAAAAAAAAY! Although I'm not too fond of the term itself (its a rather annoying word, good concept, stupid word), it is, basically, gay. :P A bit of shoujo ai, eventually... Some innuendos, I'm sure, and minor language. Yes? Pairings are... 1 x 2 (naw, really?), 3 x 4, 5 x ? :D you find out almost for sure this chapter!, and then the shoujo ai I might work in (look in my profile and I'm sure you can figure them out :D) Oh, and once more... Relena is going to be a completely nice, kind character in this story AS SHE IS MEANT TO BE. She is NOT a stalker, she is not a pink obsessed little bizznatch, and she is a wonderful character with a wonderful heart. So there. :P Deal with it.
Argh X_x; I put the note but not the link x.x It looked like I was saying 'this is a gorgeous story' about my own thing O_x; NOT WHAT I MEANT, FOLKS! Aieeee! Do a search for Ryoko no Shinigami and read the story titled 'Let me go sometime' That one! U_u;;;; Gee, don't I look modest x_x; Uhm... yes. Go read that one, One Shot, and the Art of becoming Zechs Merquise. Yay!
Oh, and ONE MORE THING! I don't honestly believe this fic could ever, ever have happened. I don't believe in this, as I don't think (heck, everyone KNOWS) that Heero and Duo could not have possibly done anything past slight crushes or one night stands at all during the war, or even until after EW. It just didn't happen. Nope. However, with the plot that appeared in my head, it was necessary for the fic to take place during the series. I have no idea when, for the above reasons, though probably when they were still on Earth as they seemed to have a bit more free time then. Mmkay? In fact, I suppose all yaoi fics that take place during the war (be it 1x2 or any other coupling) are actually AUs. Hm.
Anyway *cough* Now that I have all sorts of various rants off my chest.. To the chapter! ^_^;
**
Dinner was relatively uneventful. Wufei himself was seemingly even more distant then usual, and Duo looked slightly more evil. Heero himself, in fact, was rather doubtful as to which one it would be wiser to keep an eye on... In the end, he decided to simply glance at them occasionally and remain seemingly unawares to any sort of tension that might be hovering about. Naturally, Duo inhaled his food whilst still managing to chatter endlessly, and was done several minutes before the other, quieter bishounen. Heero tactfully chose not to mention the photos from Quatre, lest Duo realize the chance that he had seen The Website... Much too early for that to happen. Wufei was the first to leave, muttering a quick 'Thank you' before setting his plate silently on the counter and walking back to his room. Duo grinned at him with a rather 'I know something you know but won't tell meeeee' look, which, to Heero, backed his theory that Duo must have found out something... Something, no doubt, that he certainly was NOT supposed to know.
A few minutes after Wufei left, Heero too picked up his plate, bowed a thank you, and left without a word. He could, however, sense Duo's gaze lingering on him for nearly a minute as he walked carefully to his room and shut the door... Although it certainly could have been his imagination, as merely seconds after he safely behind the door he could hear Duo getting up and humming 'Shooting Star'.
He noiselessly slid into the office chair and switched on the laptop. He pondered. OZ would probably be the most likely place to find something, as Wufei would never do anything outside of the mission... After all, no matter how important anything else was, Wufei above all viewed the war as top priority... No way he'd go off and do otherwise. Duo had even had lectures from the Chinese pilot about 'Not being dedicated enough to the mission' and how it was 'Top priority, far more important than anything.. Including collecting rare stones, yes...' Even the lectures alone were enough to make Heero nearly positive it would have something to do with OZ. Once an Internet window had been brought up, the skilled hacker quickly broke into the OZ site and reached the next weeks mission plans. '... Nani?' He frowned. Odd... There were all the usual missions and such, attacks, taking over various pacifist nations, etc, but... Unless the information on the site was incorrect, Treize himself would not be present at any of them. The spandex clad boy stared.. Surely Wufei wasn't going to challenge the OZ leader to ANOTHER duel...? Hoo, that would NOT be a good thing.
After much prying and annoying, Duo had managed to convince Trowa (though it was mainly the persuasion on Quatre's part) to tell him and the other 3 about Wufei's first encounter with Treize. If what Trowa had said was true, Treize had apparently spared Wufei's life on little more than a random whim, with the simple explanation of 'he would not kill... those who understood him.' Those had been Trowa's exact words, and Heero could tell he was telling the truth. With further prodding (and Quatre looking immensely worried), Trowa had also revealed that the only other thing that Wufei was infuriated at Treize's refusal to complete the duel and had gone back several times to either ask for a rematch or to ask for death. Even the circus actor himself simply knew the information from a few brief conversations with the Chinese pilot while attempting to figure out where he had kept disappearing to.
Heero grimaced. Wufei seemed to be simply PLEADING for death, attempting to fight an obviously more powerful enemy over and over. But then... Heero sighed, remembering his own past few suicide attempts. All of them.. All of them had asked for death more than a few times, and not all of them had been necessary. Well... No, Quatre certainly hadn't.. Which, Heero supposed, made sense... After all, the Winner heir had a family and home to go back to. Duo only had once or twice, and those had been times when he was merely seconds away from it anyway. But still... Duo didn't seem to want to die, something that puzzled Heero no end. He didn't have family, didn't have any place to call home... Nothing. Even after losing every single thing important to him, Duo had kept on being the same old Duo, full of life and energy. Heero had never had any of those things, but for that same reason he had never had to lose them. So.. Why did Duo, of all people, want to live?
Heero could still feel the sharp pain in his cheek when Duo had slapped him, oh so long ago. It had been in their first face-to-face meeting after Heero's little exploding Seppuku, and Duo had certainly not been the usual, happy boy that Heero was constantly annoyed with. Indeed, that 'happy' boy's eyes had brimmed with unshed tears, and his pained voice had cracked more than once during the talk. Heero could still see him screaming till he was nearly hoarse, still hear the sorrow when Duo had finally quieted and said, in a voice thick with pain, "... I don't want... Anyone else close to me... Anyone at all... To die..." Heero hadn't known why he had done it, but... He promised something, that unhappy day, something he never would have thought he would say.
He had promised to treat his life with value.
It was a sad promise, in a way. Yet at the same time, it seemed to carry hope for both, and for the war. And, though he still didn't know why, he wanted to keep that oath.
"You've got mail!!!!" his computer chimed, effectively startling him nearly out of his skin. He glared at it, and whilst muttering assorted profanities, clicked on Outlook Express. He scanned through his Inbox. '.... Relena...' Heero sighed and ran a hand through his uncombed hair. Relena Peacecraft was a constant source of controversy to him...On one hand, he loved her. He really did, that he was sure of, but... Not, probably, as she would have liked. More like a sister than a lover, or simply a best friend.
He scanned through the e-mail quickly, and then reread it before jotting down some quick mental notes. According to the e-mail, he was to meet her in 5 days at a little cafe near Paris. The cafe, Caffe Delle Rose [1], was apparently a place that she and Milliardo had gone once or twice when they were younger. This wasn't the first time they had met at some odd little restaurant - Frequently they both found it necessary to get away from the war, and talking seemed to be the most successful way of doing so. Strange thing, though.. Their last meeting had been a bit awkward, with a slight layer of tension hovering around their table.
For one thing, Relena had seemed to be studying him, a fact which in itself Heero found rather eerie. It was the same look she had given him when they had first met - the 'you have a secret and I want to know what it is' stare. Her eyes would somehow become... piercing, or more so then normal, and stare unblinkingly right into his, like she was trying to piece together his soul. It scared him a bit, to be honest. At the end of the day, they had parted, reluctant as always to get back to their respective roles, and still Relena studied him. Heero himself had quickly forgotten after being immediately set upon by a hoard of Mobile dolls, but it had since lingered around in his rare moments of quiet.
He quickly typed the simple kanji equivalent of 'Nimnu Ryoukai' and hit send. She would understand, being the Vice Foreign Ministers daughter.
That done, his thoughts reverted back to finding out exactly what Wufei was up to. He stood up and turned off the laptop, then glanced at the sparrow. Well... Whatever feelings that Duo felt for him... He could NOT let them get in the way of the Mission, or peace. He simply couldn't. That being settled, he walked carefully out of the room, redid the locks, and crept silently up the stairs and in front of Wufei's room. Judging by the slow, soft breathing from the inside, the rooms' occupant truly was fully asleep. Good. He then slowly walked to Duos' room.
He knocked on the door 4 times, then tapped the doorknob, the secret knock that Duo had taught him in an attempt to stop accidentally opening the door to irate Chinese pilots. It was silent for a second, then, "Who is it?"
"It's Heero, let me in." In a matter of seconds, the door had swung open quietly and Duo was grinning at him from the other side.
"Hiyas, 'Ro, bit late to be bothering people... Need a glass of water?" Heero glared at the grinning boy before walking into the small room and shutting the door behind him. Duo motioned for him to take a seat before plopping down on the bed, apparently all ears.
"Listen... I need to ask you about something.." To his surprise, Duo simply tilted his head questioningly but didn't say a word. "Er... Well, you wouldn't happen to know what important errand Wufei has next Thursday... Do you?" At this, Duo broke out into a huge, scheming grin.
"Funny you should ask, Heero, funny you should ask..." Heero raised an eyebrow and Duo clacked his tongue at him. "Touchy business, Wuffles-san has next Thursday..." He chuckled at Heero's slightly confused expression. "Well, it's a good thing you brought it up. Listen, I need you, Quatre, and Trowa to meet me tomorrow, 14:00 hours sharp, in a reserved room at the Purple Nights Motel, in the next town over... Tell the girl at the front that the Shinigami invited you; she'll know who you are. I need to discuss Wuffles little agenda with the rest of the group, so we can decide on a game plan. Alright?"
If Heero had been anyone else, he probably would have been slightly slack- jawed through most of Duos speech. As it was, he couldn't really think of much to say. Finally, he spoke up.
"Who's the girl at the front?"
"Old friend of mine, met her a few years ago back when she worked on G's ship... Saved me from some real rough spots, and knew a whole lot about the missions... More then me, actually, and even seemed to know about you and the others." He peered at Heero. "Ever meet a rather odd looking 14 year old with long brown hair and an unusual love of purple?" Heero shook his head, and Duo blinked. "Huh... Oh well, the point is.... Would you tell the others? You being Mr. Super Hacker, you have the best chance of being able to get an e-mail out without it being intercepted... By OZ or by Angry Chang." Heero sighed.
"Mission accepted." He stood up to leave, and then had a sudden, albeit odd, inspiration. "Oh, and Duo..." Duo looked at him sideways from his position flopped out on the bed.
"Hrm?"
Heero cleared his throat softly, and speaking clearly but quietly, said, "Thanks.. for the sparrow picture, I mean. I never did tell you how much I like it... It's beautiful. Arigato."
Duo blinked, looking adorably confused. Suddenly he broke into a huge grin, and nearly yelled, "WOO! The PERFECT SOLDIER said something like a...a... A COMPLIMENT! Er... Arigato means thank you, right?" Heero blinked, then reminded himself that while he was trained in English, Duo didn't have quite as much time as he did during his training. Hence Duo had simply picked up some phrases from Heero, and otherwise spoke in English.
A ghost of a smile flitted across Heero's face once more. "It sure does. So yes... Thank you, Duo-kun, for the beautiful sketch." A real, unmasked smile somehow found its way across the normally seemingly emotionless pilots face, before he nodded a 'Good night' and walked out of the room, leaving a gaping American in his wake.
*
Said gaping American was stunned. After opening and closing his mouth several times, he finally managed out a "Gack???" Heero must have either been drinking or have a clone... He had smiled. A real smile, not a smirk, not a 'You're going to die in the next 30 seconds, were you aware?' grin.. A real, true, open smile, one without barriers. He had put down his mask.. In front of him.
The only other time he had seen a truly open look like that cross the Perfect Soldiers face had been once when Heero had been escorting Relena back after they had disappeared for one of their constant and mysterious rendezvous. Those particular meetings bugged the Hell out of him... And it's quite a feat, bugging the Hell out of the Shinigami (pun intended). From what he had seen of them, they weren't meeting for the obvious reason - one Duo dreaded more than anything - but for something more serious. Seriousness hadn't always been his weakness... But that had been before Solo, before the Maxwell Church incident. Before... Before he had become the Shinigami, cursed to kill anyone who he possibly got close to.
At the time, he had thought to himself that he would have KILLED to see that smile directed at him instead of Relena. But to get a real smile like that... He would have to be serious. For Heero to put down his barriers, Duo himself would have to do the same... And it was definitely not something he was ready to do, even if it would get him close to Heero.. Just for a second. He had been jealous, seeing Heero and Relena conversing quietly like that, like best friends without a care in the world but themselves.
He sighed. He knew, deep in his heart, that if Heero truly loved Relena... Then there was nothing he'd be able to do about it. Heero had once told him to, "Live by his emotions." Coming from the Perfect Soldier, Duo had found it pretty funny at the time... Heero never acted upon his emotions, always cloaked them, yet here he was saying to live by them. Duo had laughed at made a remark about that, earning himself a look from both Heero and Trowa.... He did indeed wonder what the look from Trowa was for, but hadn't though much of it at the time.
With one more sigh, he hoisted himself carefully from the bed to the chair, careful not to fall over and hit his head on the floor. It had happened before.. But Duo had superb balance, and within seconds was tilted around facing the computer, and ready to update his website. After all... If this didn't call for an update, nothing would.
*
The Perfect Soldier, having already easily encoded and sent out several e- mail detailing the rendezvous to the other pilots quickly typed in the URL for Duo's site. He blinked, suddenly a bit confused. Had he somehow mistyped the address? ...No, it was the right one... Duo had simply changed the index page's main picture. There was the familiar 'Welcome to da personal site of the Duo Maxwell, Shinigami Extraordinaire!', and then.. A photograph of Duo, an arm around Heero's shoulders and holding up a Peace sign, while he himself looked rather startled. But when was... Oh.
So THAT was why Duo had asked Quat' to take their picture. Indeed. He relaxed slightly; Duo must have updated that evening.
He clicked on the photograph and was immediately sent to the main page. He scrolled down and started slightly; the last update had apparently appeared less than a minute ago. What luck, Duo was updating even as he stared at the screen.
Out of interest (and waiting for Duo to finish updating and get to sleep) he clicked on the 'Quizzes' page. He smiled slightly to himself... A 'Which of my Friends are You?' test. Might as well take it, even though he was pretty darn sure what he'd get (No dah.) He glanced through the questions. Pretty standard quiz questions.. Color, what would you do, foods, socialness, etc... Heero answered them easily, pausing on a few to try to match the answers with the other pilots.
Oddly enough, although the other pilots (including Duo) were obviously included in the results, there was one extra result that he had absolutely no idea as to who it was. He could tell the ones about himself, though some of them he had difficulty figuring out (Duo, apparently, was far more perceptive then he seemed and had picked out things that even he was not fully aware of) but... This extra person, apparently rather naive and happy yet at times more intelligent then s/he seemed, was apparently someone that the braided boy was quite fond of. However, Heero noted, not as fond as the answers for himself appeared. Hn.
Finally, he came to the last question. 'Which of these appeals to you most? A-Peace 2-Justice 3- A place to call home 4-Fun 5- What you believe 6- Closure'
Heero stared. Closure.. Duo wanted closure. He shouldn't have been overly surprised, with all the shit in Duo's past, but after all that to still wish for a definite end... But it would be impossible.
OZ could be blamed of the Maxwell Church, so they were working on that, but... then there was Solo. Duo's first friend, a boy a year or two older then him, and Duo's first true friend. Duo might not have revealed too much on the matter, but from what Heero had understood the two had been inseparable. With both of them war orphans and fighting for survival, it made sense that they could have depended on each other. That is... until Solo had been killed by a plague that had swept through the city, killing thousands and leaving Duo cradling his best and only friends' body.
Closure.
Something that no matter what, Duo could never have. He could never go back and tell Solo goodbye, or even avenge him. How could someone have true closure if there's nothing to blame, nothing to say or do?
Heero, trembling slightly, hit the 'Beliefs' option and then the Submit button. Not surprisingly, he got himself as a result (though in this site, his name was 'Yuki' (probably one of the only Japanese names that Duo even knew) and although he was described as 'having some suicidal tendencies' it didn't mention 'usually while attempting to murder several hundred others in the process'. The main description, however, threw him the most... 'You, my friend, are an incredibly unusual person. You may act stoic and serious with some slightly suicidal tendencies on the side, but some people really can see right through you. You know? So look out for those people who can see you for what you truly are... A kind, caring person who simply needs to find passion, be it for something or someone. On the suicidal tendencies bit, you have a rather impulsive, violent streak, which scares the Hell out of those close to you. Lighten up and drop the mask, please, you may end up hurting someone more than you think.'
Heero gaped.
"Anou.. That was.. different.."
...Surely.. Duo didn't actually believe that, did he? That he really was a kind, caring person, simply adrift? Surely he wasn't doing THAT good a job of fooling himself... He didn't think that... Did he? Was he that optimistic to think there was a person worth caring about in need of something more under the shell?
Naw.
Or... did he?
**
[1] Caffe Delle Rose means, obviously, Cafe of the Rose in Italian. It is a restaurant I made up a while back, and it shows up in a lot of my fanfiction, role-plays, etc. Plus, it will show up more then once in this story! :D Yay! And if I stole anyone's idea... o.o;;;;; I'm not aware of it.
Okie, now about Blind Target... For those of you who haven't read it, it's rather infamous. If you're a diehard 1x2 fan... DON'T READ IT! X_x; Not only does it have a *gaspgasp* KISSY SCENE with 1xR (x_x;) but it also has a scene where Relena falls asleep on Heero's arm.. Who doesn't do a thing about it! *Multiple gasps*. Its not too good for 3x4 either ._.; And it seems to have forgotten that Catherine is Trowa's sister. U_u; Meh... Howevah ^^; I'm keeping the book, becaaaaause... It contains quite a bit of 2x5ness in it... And yes, folks x_X I've been turned into a 2x5 fan too. *sigh* All it took was 2 exceedingly well written fics (one was a lemon, so I had to use the wonderful 'Skippy the naughty' for it ^^; if you want the address for it, email me.. It is very good, though _;) the main one being which is HILARIOUS. Even if you're not a 2x5 fan... I recommend it muchly. *cough* Anyway ^_^; So, thats my rant on Blind Target... It is, however, well drawn, and very nice. :P You just have to be open minded when it comes to pairings.
GO. SEE. PIRATES. OF THE. CARIBBEAN. It is your destinyyyyyy... Orlando... *___* Johnny.. And DAMN THAT ELIZABETH GIRL! -___-### Paula and I have decided to hunt her down and murder her. Bitch.
BUT WHY IS THE DAMNED RUM GONE!!?!?! -.o!
Reviews!!
Couplekeeper: Few words, at times, are much more useful then many.
Meowmix: Take off every pie, for great justice! D *munches on pie* sankyuu vewy much *licks fingers* ^^
Cradlerobber Speedo-kun (I love your name to death. ^^;): ... GWAH!! Syaoran/Meilin... *keels over, twitching and muttering* Gwahaha.. I myself wasn't too terribly fond of Meilin x_X *twitch* However, I do see a possibility of her and Tomoyo, as they both gave up their love to let them be truly happy. ^^; Hrm.
Jes: Yesh, X-2 = Kick assness. ... And whats this about '06??? O_O;; *dies* T_T I can't wait that looooong..
Deadangel: Duo is a wonderful lil person, though terribly OOC for that last bit xD; So hence he likes singing Shooting Star... its a good song, ye must DL it.
Kage Kitsune: Grgh, updating soon is definitely not my strong point.
Jade Crescent: Few words keeps everyone somewhat farther from insanity, at times... I am living proof, one of far, far too many words. ^^;;
Momo: ...; You baka, you didn't even finish it?? XP I'll kill you, you know! And um ._.;; NOT HEERO AND ZECHS!! *twitch* I read a Duo and Zechs once X-x;; Scarred me for life, it did! ._.; And yes, yaoi forever. :D Get a compie, you dork. P! AND ANGELINA KICKS AYUMI'S ASS! D
Ryo Gin: We can pity eachother. :D ... Not like that. Oo;;;
Mugs: Wufei's a Chinese name, Wu means five. XD So um, yes... And besides :P If he hadn't been named that, we wouldn't be able to call him fun things like 'Wuffles' and 'Woofiekins!'
LB: OOCness eventually annoys me, and this chapter is the first one where I really got into putting them (or at least Duo ._.;) a bit more in character. *cough* So um, yes.
Chibidark angel: YAY THANK YOOOOU! ^^ And um ; We'll see, ne? :D
Little Princess: We'll see.. *cackle*
Moonlightchic: Gweh, so sorry I never e-mailed you back about that x_x; But um ;; I had mentioned that my fic had actually been getting reviews and such, and erm Oo; It went from there, gomen ^^;; Thank you sooo much for offering though! :D
Super Poodle: XD. Kick ass, dood. If I'm feeling overly angsty from angst fic overdose, I go read your review to myself. :3; Ehehe. Also, on your friends dad... O_O;;; Holy shit, thats like... It sounds like something that would be on a 'If someone does something that you feel uncomfortable with, you should tell an adult right away' tape that they play for you in Junior high' ;; That would terrify me.
Okies, now then, I made a pact with myself to update this once every two weeks from now at least till Christmas break, when there may be a pause for semester finals and such. Now I must send this to des and wobble to bed... Before I fall asleep on my keyboard. Again.
Oh, ph33r me. It's been...three months. I am such a dumbass. -_-; I feel sad for myself. Had summer school, rented FFX, had summer band... Going to PA tomorrow, so HAD to get this chappie out. Also, been playing Sims like mad (just finished the Peacecraft house, consisting of Relena, Dorothy, Noin, and Sally :D Yuuuuuuuri!) and Heero is now a 6th level hacker. ^^ Huzzah!
Oh, and X_x ARGH! Apologies for any of you who were like 'o.o Hey, she actually updated! *click*' or 'Hm, this looks interesting...' and either noticed that the first chapter was, in fact, the third, or that this chapter kept screwing up. -_-;;;;; ARGH. Hopefully this will be fixed. ^^;
Disclaimer: *long, tired sigh* I don't own Gundam Wing... I don't own Heero, or Duo, or even dear Wuffers... I don't own shounen ai; I don't own Outlook Express... I own the lovely lil cafe mentioned in here, though, and I own the girl at the hotel (ehehe.. Gomen, but technically... She's me ^^; I needed a chara for it...) Even at my birthday party (In which I got 2 Chobits, Love Hina Vol.4, and GW Blind Target (Which I'll discuss at the end of the chapter ._.;), doubling my manga collection :D) I didn't receive any of the aforementioned. *sigh* Life sucks, ne?
Warnings: Let's state the obvious, shall we? ^_^; This fanficcie has shounen ai. Amazing, ne? That means... *drumroll* Two guys, who are in love! :D:D GAAAAAAAAY! Although I'm not too fond of the term itself (its a rather annoying word, good concept, stupid word), it is, basically, gay. :P A bit of shoujo ai, eventually... Some innuendos, I'm sure, and minor language. Yes? Pairings are... 1 x 2 (naw, really?), 3 x 4, 5 x ? :D you find out almost for sure this chapter!, and then the shoujo ai I might work in (look in my profile and I'm sure you can figure them out :D) Oh, and once more... Relena is going to be a completely nice, kind character in this story AS SHE IS MEANT TO BE. She is NOT a stalker, she is not a pink obsessed little bizznatch, and she is a wonderful character with a wonderful heart. So there. :P Deal with it.
Argh X_x; I put the note but not the link x.x It looked like I was saying 'this is a gorgeous story' about my own thing O_x; NOT WHAT I MEANT, FOLKS! Aieeee! Do a search for Ryoko no Shinigami and read the story titled 'Let me go sometime' That one! U_u;;;; Gee, don't I look modest x_x; Uhm... yes. Go read that one, One Shot, and the Art of becoming Zechs Merquise. Yay!
Oh, and ONE MORE THING! I don't honestly believe this fic could ever, ever have happened. I don't believe in this, as I don't think (heck, everyone KNOWS) that Heero and Duo could not have possibly done anything past slight crushes or one night stands at all during the war, or even until after EW. It just didn't happen. Nope. However, with the plot that appeared in my head, it was necessary for the fic to take place during the series. I have no idea when, for the above reasons, though probably when they were still on Earth as they seemed to have a bit more free time then. Mmkay? In fact, I suppose all yaoi fics that take place during the war (be it 1x2 or any other coupling) are actually AUs. Hm.
Anyway *cough* Now that I have all sorts of various rants off my chest.. To the chapter! ^_^;
**
Dinner was relatively uneventful. Wufei himself was seemingly even more distant then usual, and Duo looked slightly more evil. Heero himself, in fact, was rather doubtful as to which one it would be wiser to keep an eye on... In the end, he decided to simply glance at them occasionally and remain seemingly unawares to any sort of tension that might be hovering about. Naturally, Duo inhaled his food whilst still managing to chatter endlessly, and was done several minutes before the other, quieter bishounen. Heero tactfully chose not to mention the photos from Quatre, lest Duo realize the chance that he had seen The Website... Much too early for that to happen. Wufei was the first to leave, muttering a quick 'Thank you' before setting his plate silently on the counter and walking back to his room. Duo grinned at him with a rather 'I know something you know but won't tell meeeee' look, which, to Heero, backed his theory that Duo must have found out something... Something, no doubt, that he certainly was NOT supposed to know.
A few minutes after Wufei left, Heero too picked up his plate, bowed a thank you, and left without a word. He could, however, sense Duo's gaze lingering on him for nearly a minute as he walked carefully to his room and shut the door... Although it certainly could have been his imagination, as merely seconds after he safely behind the door he could hear Duo getting up and humming 'Shooting Star'.
He noiselessly slid into the office chair and switched on the laptop. He pondered. OZ would probably be the most likely place to find something, as Wufei would never do anything outside of the mission... After all, no matter how important anything else was, Wufei above all viewed the war as top priority... No way he'd go off and do otherwise. Duo had even had lectures from the Chinese pilot about 'Not being dedicated enough to the mission' and how it was 'Top priority, far more important than anything.. Including collecting rare stones, yes...' Even the lectures alone were enough to make Heero nearly positive it would have something to do with OZ. Once an Internet window had been brought up, the skilled hacker quickly broke into the OZ site and reached the next weeks mission plans. '... Nani?' He frowned. Odd... There were all the usual missions and such, attacks, taking over various pacifist nations, etc, but... Unless the information on the site was incorrect, Treize himself would not be present at any of them. The spandex clad boy stared.. Surely Wufei wasn't going to challenge the OZ leader to ANOTHER duel...? Hoo, that would NOT be a good thing.
After much prying and annoying, Duo had managed to convince Trowa (though it was mainly the persuasion on Quatre's part) to tell him and the other 3 about Wufei's first encounter with Treize. If what Trowa had said was true, Treize had apparently spared Wufei's life on little more than a random whim, with the simple explanation of 'he would not kill... those who understood him.' Those had been Trowa's exact words, and Heero could tell he was telling the truth. With further prodding (and Quatre looking immensely worried), Trowa had also revealed that the only other thing that Wufei was infuriated at Treize's refusal to complete the duel and had gone back several times to either ask for a rematch or to ask for death. Even the circus actor himself simply knew the information from a few brief conversations with the Chinese pilot while attempting to figure out where he had kept disappearing to.
Heero grimaced. Wufei seemed to be simply PLEADING for death, attempting to fight an obviously more powerful enemy over and over. But then... Heero sighed, remembering his own past few suicide attempts. All of them.. All of them had asked for death more than a few times, and not all of them had been necessary. Well... No, Quatre certainly hadn't.. Which, Heero supposed, made sense... After all, the Winner heir had a family and home to go back to. Duo only had once or twice, and those had been times when he was merely seconds away from it anyway. But still... Duo didn't seem to want to die, something that puzzled Heero no end. He didn't have family, didn't have any place to call home... Nothing. Even after losing every single thing important to him, Duo had kept on being the same old Duo, full of life and energy. Heero had never had any of those things, but for that same reason he had never had to lose them. So.. Why did Duo, of all people, want to live?
Heero could still feel the sharp pain in his cheek when Duo had slapped him, oh so long ago. It had been in their first face-to-face meeting after Heero's little exploding Seppuku, and Duo had certainly not been the usual, happy boy that Heero was constantly annoyed with. Indeed, that 'happy' boy's eyes had brimmed with unshed tears, and his pained voice had cracked more than once during the talk. Heero could still see him screaming till he was nearly hoarse, still hear the sorrow when Duo had finally quieted and said, in a voice thick with pain, "... I don't want... Anyone else close to me... Anyone at all... To die..." Heero hadn't known why he had done it, but... He promised something, that unhappy day, something he never would have thought he would say.
He had promised to treat his life with value.
It was a sad promise, in a way. Yet at the same time, it seemed to carry hope for both, and for the war. And, though he still didn't know why, he wanted to keep that oath.
"You've got mail!!!!" his computer chimed, effectively startling him nearly out of his skin. He glared at it, and whilst muttering assorted profanities, clicked on Outlook Express. He scanned through his Inbox. '.... Relena...' Heero sighed and ran a hand through his uncombed hair. Relena Peacecraft was a constant source of controversy to him...On one hand, he loved her. He really did, that he was sure of, but... Not, probably, as she would have liked. More like a sister than a lover, or simply a best friend.
He scanned through the e-mail quickly, and then reread it before jotting down some quick mental notes. According to the e-mail, he was to meet her in 5 days at a little cafe near Paris. The cafe, Caffe Delle Rose [1], was apparently a place that she and Milliardo had gone once or twice when they were younger. This wasn't the first time they had met at some odd little restaurant - Frequently they both found it necessary to get away from the war, and talking seemed to be the most successful way of doing so. Strange thing, though.. Their last meeting had been a bit awkward, with a slight layer of tension hovering around their table.
For one thing, Relena had seemed to be studying him, a fact which in itself Heero found rather eerie. It was the same look she had given him when they had first met - the 'you have a secret and I want to know what it is' stare. Her eyes would somehow become... piercing, or more so then normal, and stare unblinkingly right into his, like she was trying to piece together his soul. It scared him a bit, to be honest. At the end of the day, they had parted, reluctant as always to get back to their respective roles, and still Relena studied him. Heero himself had quickly forgotten after being immediately set upon by a hoard of Mobile dolls, but it had since lingered around in his rare moments of quiet.
He quickly typed the simple kanji equivalent of 'Nimnu Ryoukai' and hit send. She would understand, being the Vice Foreign Ministers daughter.
That done, his thoughts reverted back to finding out exactly what Wufei was up to. He stood up and turned off the laptop, then glanced at the sparrow. Well... Whatever feelings that Duo felt for him... He could NOT let them get in the way of the Mission, or peace. He simply couldn't. That being settled, he walked carefully out of the room, redid the locks, and crept silently up the stairs and in front of Wufei's room. Judging by the slow, soft breathing from the inside, the rooms' occupant truly was fully asleep. Good. He then slowly walked to Duos' room.
He knocked on the door 4 times, then tapped the doorknob, the secret knock that Duo had taught him in an attempt to stop accidentally opening the door to irate Chinese pilots. It was silent for a second, then, "Who is it?"
"It's Heero, let me in." In a matter of seconds, the door had swung open quietly and Duo was grinning at him from the other side.
"Hiyas, 'Ro, bit late to be bothering people... Need a glass of water?" Heero glared at the grinning boy before walking into the small room and shutting the door behind him. Duo motioned for him to take a seat before plopping down on the bed, apparently all ears.
"Listen... I need to ask you about something.." To his surprise, Duo simply tilted his head questioningly but didn't say a word. "Er... Well, you wouldn't happen to know what important errand Wufei has next Thursday... Do you?" At this, Duo broke out into a huge, scheming grin.
"Funny you should ask, Heero, funny you should ask..." Heero raised an eyebrow and Duo clacked his tongue at him. "Touchy business, Wuffles-san has next Thursday..." He chuckled at Heero's slightly confused expression. "Well, it's a good thing you brought it up. Listen, I need you, Quatre, and Trowa to meet me tomorrow, 14:00 hours sharp, in a reserved room at the Purple Nights Motel, in the next town over... Tell the girl at the front that the Shinigami invited you; she'll know who you are. I need to discuss Wuffles little agenda with the rest of the group, so we can decide on a game plan. Alright?"
If Heero had been anyone else, he probably would have been slightly slack- jawed through most of Duos speech. As it was, he couldn't really think of much to say. Finally, he spoke up.
"Who's the girl at the front?"
"Old friend of mine, met her a few years ago back when she worked on G's ship... Saved me from some real rough spots, and knew a whole lot about the missions... More then me, actually, and even seemed to know about you and the others." He peered at Heero. "Ever meet a rather odd looking 14 year old with long brown hair and an unusual love of purple?" Heero shook his head, and Duo blinked. "Huh... Oh well, the point is.... Would you tell the others? You being Mr. Super Hacker, you have the best chance of being able to get an e-mail out without it being intercepted... By OZ or by Angry Chang." Heero sighed.
"Mission accepted." He stood up to leave, and then had a sudden, albeit odd, inspiration. "Oh, and Duo..." Duo looked at him sideways from his position flopped out on the bed.
"Hrm?"
Heero cleared his throat softly, and speaking clearly but quietly, said, "Thanks.. for the sparrow picture, I mean. I never did tell you how much I like it... It's beautiful. Arigato."
Duo blinked, looking adorably confused. Suddenly he broke into a huge grin, and nearly yelled, "WOO! The PERFECT SOLDIER said something like a...a... A COMPLIMENT! Er... Arigato means thank you, right?" Heero blinked, then reminded himself that while he was trained in English, Duo didn't have quite as much time as he did during his training. Hence Duo had simply picked up some phrases from Heero, and otherwise spoke in English.
A ghost of a smile flitted across Heero's face once more. "It sure does. So yes... Thank you, Duo-kun, for the beautiful sketch." A real, unmasked smile somehow found its way across the normally seemingly emotionless pilots face, before he nodded a 'Good night' and walked out of the room, leaving a gaping American in his wake.
*
Said gaping American was stunned. After opening and closing his mouth several times, he finally managed out a "Gack???" Heero must have either been drinking or have a clone... He had smiled. A real smile, not a smirk, not a 'You're going to die in the next 30 seconds, were you aware?' grin.. A real, true, open smile, one without barriers. He had put down his mask.. In front of him.
The only other time he had seen a truly open look like that cross the Perfect Soldiers face had been once when Heero had been escorting Relena back after they had disappeared for one of their constant and mysterious rendezvous. Those particular meetings bugged the Hell out of him... And it's quite a feat, bugging the Hell out of the Shinigami (pun intended). From what he had seen of them, they weren't meeting for the obvious reason - one Duo dreaded more than anything - but for something more serious. Seriousness hadn't always been his weakness... But that had been before Solo, before the Maxwell Church incident. Before... Before he had become the Shinigami, cursed to kill anyone who he possibly got close to.
At the time, he had thought to himself that he would have KILLED to see that smile directed at him instead of Relena. But to get a real smile like that... He would have to be serious. For Heero to put down his barriers, Duo himself would have to do the same... And it was definitely not something he was ready to do, even if it would get him close to Heero.. Just for a second. He had been jealous, seeing Heero and Relena conversing quietly like that, like best friends without a care in the world but themselves.
He sighed. He knew, deep in his heart, that if Heero truly loved Relena... Then there was nothing he'd be able to do about it. Heero had once told him to, "Live by his emotions." Coming from the Perfect Soldier, Duo had found it pretty funny at the time... Heero never acted upon his emotions, always cloaked them, yet here he was saying to live by them. Duo had laughed at made a remark about that, earning himself a look from both Heero and Trowa.... He did indeed wonder what the look from Trowa was for, but hadn't though much of it at the time.
With one more sigh, he hoisted himself carefully from the bed to the chair, careful not to fall over and hit his head on the floor. It had happened before.. But Duo had superb balance, and within seconds was tilted around facing the computer, and ready to update his website. After all... If this didn't call for an update, nothing would.
*
The Perfect Soldier, having already easily encoded and sent out several e- mail detailing the rendezvous to the other pilots quickly typed in the URL for Duo's site. He blinked, suddenly a bit confused. Had he somehow mistyped the address? ...No, it was the right one... Duo had simply changed the index page's main picture. There was the familiar 'Welcome to da personal site of the Duo Maxwell, Shinigami Extraordinaire!', and then.. A photograph of Duo, an arm around Heero's shoulders and holding up a Peace sign, while he himself looked rather startled. But when was... Oh.
So THAT was why Duo had asked Quat' to take their picture. Indeed. He relaxed slightly; Duo must have updated that evening.
He clicked on the photograph and was immediately sent to the main page. He scrolled down and started slightly; the last update had apparently appeared less than a minute ago. What luck, Duo was updating even as he stared at the screen.
Out of interest (and waiting for Duo to finish updating and get to sleep) he clicked on the 'Quizzes' page. He smiled slightly to himself... A 'Which of my Friends are You?' test. Might as well take it, even though he was pretty darn sure what he'd get (No dah.) He glanced through the questions. Pretty standard quiz questions.. Color, what would you do, foods, socialness, etc... Heero answered them easily, pausing on a few to try to match the answers with the other pilots.
Oddly enough, although the other pilots (including Duo) were obviously included in the results, there was one extra result that he had absolutely no idea as to who it was. He could tell the ones about himself, though some of them he had difficulty figuring out (Duo, apparently, was far more perceptive then he seemed and had picked out things that even he was not fully aware of) but... This extra person, apparently rather naive and happy yet at times more intelligent then s/he seemed, was apparently someone that the braided boy was quite fond of. However, Heero noted, not as fond as the answers for himself appeared. Hn.
Finally, he came to the last question. 'Which of these appeals to you most? A-Peace 2-Justice 3- A place to call home 4-Fun 5- What you believe 6- Closure'
Heero stared. Closure.. Duo wanted closure. He shouldn't have been overly surprised, with all the shit in Duo's past, but after all that to still wish for a definite end... But it would be impossible.
OZ could be blamed of the Maxwell Church, so they were working on that, but... then there was Solo. Duo's first friend, a boy a year or two older then him, and Duo's first true friend. Duo might not have revealed too much on the matter, but from what Heero had understood the two had been inseparable. With both of them war orphans and fighting for survival, it made sense that they could have depended on each other. That is... until Solo had been killed by a plague that had swept through the city, killing thousands and leaving Duo cradling his best and only friends' body.
Closure.
Something that no matter what, Duo could never have. He could never go back and tell Solo goodbye, or even avenge him. How could someone have true closure if there's nothing to blame, nothing to say or do?
Heero, trembling slightly, hit the 'Beliefs' option and then the Submit button. Not surprisingly, he got himself as a result (though in this site, his name was 'Yuki' (probably one of the only Japanese names that Duo even knew) and although he was described as 'having some suicidal tendencies' it didn't mention 'usually while attempting to murder several hundred others in the process'. The main description, however, threw him the most... 'You, my friend, are an incredibly unusual person. You may act stoic and serious with some slightly suicidal tendencies on the side, but some people really can see right through you. You know? So look out for those people who can see you for what you truly are... A kind, caring person who simply needs to find passion, be it for something or someone. On the suicidal tendencies bit, you have a rather impulsive, violent streak, which scares the Hell out of those close to you. Lighten up and drop the mask, please, you may end up hurting someone more than you think.'
Heero gaped.
"Anou.. That was.. different.."
...Surely.. Duo didn't actually believe that, did he? That he really was a kind, caring person, simply adrift? Surely he wasn't doing THAT good a job of fooling himself... He didn't think that... Did he? Was he that optimistic to think there was a person worth caring about in need of something more under the shell?
Naw.
Or... did he?
**
[1] Caffe Delle Rose means, obviously, Cafe of the Rose in Italian. It is a restaurant I made up a while back, and it shows up in a lot of my fanfiction, role-plays, etc. Plus, it will show up more then once in this story! :D Yay! And if I stole anyone's idea... o.o;;;;; I'm not aware of it.
Okie, now about Blind Target... For those of you who haven't read it, it's rather infamous. If you're a diehard 1x2 fan... DON'T READ IT! X_x; Not only does it have a *gaspgasp* KISSY SCENE with 1xR (x_x;) but it also has a scene where Relena falls asleep on Heero's arm.. Who doesn't do a thing about it! *Multiple gasps*. Its not too good for 3x4 either ._.; And it seems to have forgotten that Catherine is Trowa's sister. U_u; Meh... Howevah ^^; I'm keeping the book, becaaaaause... It contains quite a bit of 2x5ness in it... And yes, folks x_X I've been turned into a 2x5 fan too. *sigh* All it took was 2 exceedingly well written fics (one was a lemon, so I had to use the wonderful 'Skippy the naughty' for it ^^; if you want the address for it, email me.. It is very good, though _;) the main one being which is HILARIOUS. Even if you're not a 2x5 fan... I recommend it muchly. *cough* Anyway ^_^; So, thats my rant on Blind Target... It is, however, well drawn, and very nice. :P You just have to be open minded when it comes to pairings.
GO. SEE. PIRATES. OF THE. CARIBBEAN. It is your destinyyyyyy... Orlando... *___* Johnny.. And DAMN THAT ELIZABETH GIRL! -___-### Paula and I have decided to hunt her down and murder her. Bitch.
BUT WHY IS THE DAMNED RUM GONE!!?!?! -.o!
Reviews!!
Couplekeeper: Few words, at times, are much more useful then many.
Meowmix: Take off every pie, for great justice! D *munches on pie* sankyuu vewy much *licks fingers* ^^
Cradlerobber Speedo-kun (I love your name to death. ^^;): ... GWAH!! Syaoran/Meilin... *keels over, twitching and muttering* Gwahaha.. I myself wasn't too terribly fond of Meilin x_X *twitch* However, I do see a possibility of her and Tomoyo, as they both gave up their love to let them be truly happy. ^^; Hrm.
Jes: Yesh, X-2 = Kick assness. ... And whats this about '06??? O_O;; *dies* T_T I can't wait that looooong..
Deadangel: Duo is a wonderful lil person, though terribly OOC for that last bit xD; So hence he likes singing Shooting Star... its a good song, ye must DL it.
Kage Kitsune: Grgh, updating soon is definitely not my strong point.
Jade Crescent: Few words keeps everyone somewhat farther from insanity, at times... I am living proof, one of far, far too many words. ^^;;
Momo: ...; You baka, you didn't even finish it?? XP I'll kill you, you know! And um ._.;; NOT HEERO AND ZECHS!! *twitch* I read a Duo and Zechs once X-x;; Scarred me for life, it did! ._.; And yes, yaoi forever. :D Get a compie, you dork. P! AND ANGELINA KICKS AYUMI'S ASS! D
Ryo Gin: We can pity eachother. :D ... Not like that. Oo;;;
Mugs: Wufei's a Chinese name, Wu means five. XD So um, yes... And besides :P If he hadn't been named that, we wouldn't be able to call him fun things like 'Wuffles' and 'Woofiekins!'
LB: OOCness eventually annoys me, and this chapter is the first one where I really got into putting them (or at least Duo ._.;) a bit more in character. *cough* So um, yes.
Chibidark angel: YAY THANK YOOOOU! ^^ And um ; We'll see, ne? :D
Little Princess: We'll see.. *cackle*
Moonlightchic: Gweh, so sorry I never e-mailed you back about that x_x; But um ;; I had mentioned that my fic had actually been getting reviews and such, and erm Oo; It went from there, gomen ^^;; Thank you sooo much for offering though! :D
Super Poodle: XD. Kick ass, dood. If I'm feeling overly angsty from angst fic overdose, I go read your review to myself. :3; Ehehe. Also, on your friends dad... O_O;;; Holy shit, thats like... It sounds like something that would be on a 'If someone does something that you feel uncomfortable with, you should tell an adult right away' tape that they play for you in Junior high' ;; That would terrify me.
Okies, now then, I made a pact with myself to update this once every two weeks from now at least till Christmas break, when there may be a pause for semester finals and such. Now I must send this to des and wobble to bed... Before I fall asleep on my keyboard. Again.