Disclaimer: I am a humble servant of J.K. Rowling, taking her characters to ridiculous levels.
A/N: this chapter has a slight serious note to it, because snape does have issues, after all
The Hall was packed with students, all of them anxiously awaiting the arrival of their new rock-god professor. "I bet he's going to look SO Sexy," Draco gushed to anyone who would listen. Harry and Ron looked ill. Hermione was spouting, "I am really so proud of Severus. I read all about Muggle rock stars. He's making a huge step towards self confidence. I really am so proud..."
A silence fell upon the Hall as Madam Hooch took the stage, yet again wearing her Freaky Quidditch Goggles(TM). They looked as if they belonged in the setting, however. "Thank you all for coming here tonight! And now, it is my extreme pleasure to announce the newest god of heavy metal! Severus... SNAPE!!!!!!!!!"
Snape floated up from the floor. No one should have been surprised, he did this often. But tonight it looked... as draco exclaimed "sexier than usual!"
He strode to the wand taped to a stick... er, "microphone". with his hair falling across his face and his cloak billowing behind him, he began singing in a low, creepy (think Nick Cave or Corey Taylor) voice...
"I've seen the dark side
served the lord of death
I've seen the good side
served the king of all
admonished, denied
hidden my real self inside
taken my life out of my head
and put it somewhere else
somewhere I thought you'd never find
*screaming almost unintelligibly* OH YEAH MY PENSIEVE!
Sometimes we only live for the here and now.
Sometimes we're lonely.
Sometimes we feel we need a place to be grounded...
or fly away again.
I will fly away again.
*OH YEAH I'M LIKE A BAT, YEAH, BAT, YEAH WA-A-A-A-A!*
I'm so damned
I can't win
With my heart in my hands again
*RED AND SQUISHY, YEAH, HEART IN MY HANDS MOTHERFUCKER!*
I don't understand why you don't like me
Why don't you like me?
Am I so different from you
Now does it scare you that I'm able to discern
What to love and what to burn
I'll add your fuel to the fire now
Stand back, brother take your hand back
Leave it and I might crack
More than a smile or two you see
Don't judge what you don't understand
You can't deny what has been given to me
*DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY….
DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY….*
Thank you Hogwarts! Good night!"
The Great Hall erupted in applause and cries of "SNAPE, SNAPE. SNAPE!" A mosh pit had begun to form when darkness suddenly descended upon the Great Hall.
A/N: credit where credit is due:
verse 2 - godsmack's "spiral" from the album "awake"
verse 4 - …and you will know us by the trail of dead's "heart in the hand of the matter" album "source tags and codes"
verse 6 - disturbed's "fear" from album "the sickness"
A/N: this chapter has a slight serious note to it, because snape does have issues, after all
The Hall was packed with students, all of them anxiously awaiting the arrival of their new rock-god professor. "I bet he's going to look SO Sexy," Draco gushed to anyone who would listen. Harry and Ron looked ill. Hermione was spouting, "I am really so proud of Severus. I read all about Muggle rock stars. He's making a huge step towards self confidence. I really am so proud..."
A silence fell upon the Hall as Madam Hooch took the stage, yet again wearing her Freaky Quidditch Goggles(TM). They looked as if they belonged in the setting, however. "Thank you all for coming here tonight! And now, it is my extreme pleasure to announce the newest god of heavy metal! Severus... SNAPE!!!!!!!!!"
Snape floated up from the floor. No one should have been surprised, he did this often. But tonight it looked... as draco exclaimed "sexier than usual!"
He strode to the wand taped to a stick... er, "microphone". with his hair falling across his face and his cloak billowing behind him, he began singing in a low, creepy (think Nick Cave or Corey Taylor) voice...
"I've seen the dark side
served the lord of death
I've seen the good side
served the king of all
admonished, denied
hidden my real self inside
taken my life out of my head
and put it somewhere else
somewhere I thought you'd never find
*screaming almost unintelligibly* OH YEAH MY PENSIEVE!
Sometimes we only live for the here and now.
Sometimes we're lonely.
Sometimes we feel we need a place to be grounded...
or fly away again.
I will fly away again.
*OH YEAH I'M LIKE A BAT, YEAH, BAT, YEAH WA-A-A-A-A!*
I'm so damned
I can't win
With my heart in my hands again
*RED AND SQUISHY, YEAH, HEART IN MY HANDS MOTHERFUCKER!*
I don't understand why you don't like me
Why don't you like me?
Am I so different from you
Now does it scare you that I'm able to discern
What to love and what to burn
I'll add your fuel to the fire now
Stand back, brother take your hand back
Leave it and I might crack
More than a smile or two you see
Don't judge what you don't understand
You can't deny what has been given to me
*DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY….
DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY, DEAD SEXY….*
Thank you Hogwarts! Good night!"
The Great Hall erupted in applause and cries of "SNAPE, SNAPE. SNAPE!" A mosh pit had begun to form when darkness suddenly descended upon the Great Hall.
A/N: credit where credit is due:
verse 2 - godsmack's "spiral" from the album "awake"
verse 4 - …and you will know us by the trail of dead's "heart in the hand of the matter" album "source tags and codes"
verse 6 - disturbed's "fear" from album "the sickness"