Winnie the Drew

by The Drew

This is a very screwed up Parody of Winnie the Pooh, involving myself and my friends as the characters. Read, Laugh, Review! Note- If you take offense to this, I've done my job. COMPLETED

2. The Munchies

Pt.2: The Munchies

Narrator: After many hours of unconscious slumber, Winnie the Drew awoke from his stoned rest, filled with the munchies.

Drew: What's a bear gotta do to get some Fucking food around here!

(No answer)

Drew: Ahem.

Narrator: Yes. Right. Right away, Drew bear started to walk, getting his mind off food.

Drew: Wrong. I'm looking for food, dumbass.

(Drew walks a bit, and doesn't notice the tree in front of him …till he hits it.)

Drew: OUCH! Who the hell put that tree there??

(Looks up, and sees a beehive.)

Drew: Mmmm.. Food. (Looks at the height of the tree) The only redwood in the forest, and it's the one with food.. Perfect.

Narrator: Any idea how to get the food?

Drew: I was about to ask you the same question… Wait… I got an idea!

(Drew walks off screen. He returns with climbing equipment.)

Drew: Bears can climb trees, can't they?

Narrator: Yes, but most bears your height don't weigh 206lbs.

Drew: Touché. But that food will be mine.

(Drew climbs 1/3 up the tree, then his rope snaps.)

Drew: Shit.

(He falls. Drew is flattened on the ground. He peels himself up.)

Narrator: Told you so.

Drew: Shut up. I will do it.

(Drews walks off screen. We get a wide shot of the tree)

Drew: RAHHHH!!! (Runs straight into the tree, head first)

Narrator: And so, after many attempts, Drew finally gave-

Drew: Not yet my psychic friend!

(Goes off screen. Runs back on with a chainsaw and a hockey mask)

Drew: Die stupid tree! (Chainsaw breaks)

(Goes off screen again. Comes back on with an axe. It shatters)

Drew: AHHH! (Wider shot. Drews runs full force into the tree again)

Narrator: Oh boy.

(Drews hits head on and the hive falls onto his head)

Drew: Hmm. AHHHH! (Runs around like a chicken with it's head cut off)

Narrator: In the meantime, Stiglet had awoken, and wandered to the sound of the screaming.

Stiglet: What the hell is going on (He sees Drew) Am I still stoned?

Drew: AHHH! (His the tree) Get this thing off me! (Hits Stiglet, the hive splits)

Stiglet: AHH!

Drew: ( His face bruised by stings) What? (Passes out)

Stiglet: Right… Now, what's there to eat?

Narrator: So, leaving his injured friend out cold, Stiglet wandered till he reached Cabbit's garden.

Stiglet: Drugs or not, it's edible. (Eats some leaves) Wow, I feel so light-headed (Passes out)

Narrator: Once again, another of our heroes passes out, and we return to the others as two of them awaken.

(We see the other 6 animals, and Nickger and Soo are waking up.)

Nickger: I'm so hungry, I could eat anything.

Soo: Me too. You thinking what I'm thinking?

Nickger: 69?

Soo: Ya. Let's do it.

(The two begin to satisfy their munchies. In the meantime, Ropher has awakened)

Ropher: Oh my head… (She the others) Oh, that's not right!

(He starts tunnelling and leaves)

(Cabbit has awakened. He looks around)

Cabbit: No one to see me jerk off. Excellent.

(Janga has awakened behind him, and sees him ready to jerk off to the scene in front of him)

Janga: You sick little freak! (She kicks him into the next chapter)

Neyore: (dazed) Why you so ticked off man, just relax.

Janga: I'm ticked because I caught that little rabbit jerking off to my sister and Nickger.

Neyore: Just relax and enjoy the rest. I don't think you'll get to rest again for a while.

Janga: Whatever. (Begins to sleep)

Neyore: And that's that. (Passes out)

Narrator: And so, the friends all continue to rest and-

Drew: (awake/angry) Just shut up, won't you?

The End (Of Story Two)