The next morning, Luis
and Sheridan were gathered in the room that she and Gwen were sharing. Over the past few days, they had hatched the
beginning of many a half-baked plan, but had been unable to get very far on the
little information they currently possessed. As they worked so closely together, sitting across from each other at
the small table located in one corner of the room, they could both feel an
unspoken, unacknowledged tension in the air, crackling like electricity. Occasionally, one of them would glance at
Right now, however,
both of their minds were occupied not with thoughts of each other, but of
ever-increasing anxiety over the safety of Hank and Gwen, who had not come back
at all that night. As the hours went by,
they became increasingly sure that something awful had happened to them.
Not able to take just
sitting around anymore, Luis slammed his fist hard into the table's surface,
causing the flimsily made piece of furniture to shudder violently. "Damn it!" he shouted to the air, "They were
supposed to get back here hours ago! I'm
a cop; I should have been the one doing the recon here, not them. If anything's happened, it's all my fault."
"Now don't go and feel
sorry for yourself!"
Indeed, Gwen and Hank
had appeared in the threshold, somewhat the worse for wear. Clothes badly wrinkled, hair disheveled, and
each sporting a dazed expression which, along with the telltale bags under
their eyes, indicated that they had not gotten very much sleep
the night before. Despite the mess that
they looked, however, they did not appear at all distressed or unhappy. Seeing the two, Luis and Sheridan practically
leaped up and dashed over to greet them.
"Thank goodness you're
alright,"
"Yeah," Luis added,
relieved. "When you didn't check in, we
thought you'd been captured or killed or hurt or something."
Gwen and Hank looked at
each other guiltily. "Well, not
exactly," Hank began to explain sheepishly. "The thing is, you see, we, um, it sort of happened that…with everything
going on, we kind of decided to, um, and then we, well…"
"We got married," Gwen
interrupted finally.
"WHAT?!"
Sheridan and Luis both yelled in perfect unison as they stared incredulously at
their friends, jaws dropped.
"Well," Gwen started,
"we found out where Antonio's being kept—"
"Great!" Luis
exclaimed. "Where is he?"
Hank went over
everything that had happened, ending with, "and then they walked off and left
us alone."
"Oookay,"
Gwen laughed nervously. "After nearly getting killed, you see, it
sort of hit me how much danger we're all in, and Hank tried to comfort me, and
one thing led to another…"
"I don't know what got
into me," Hank confessed, "but suddenly I found myself asking Gwen to marry me,
and somehow she said yes, so we went to a justice of the peace, and eloped."
They all stood in an
awkward silence for a good length of time, until Luis finally said, "Well,
congratulations, I guess, though I still don't know what drugs you two must've
been doing. Anyway," he continued,
thinking it best to change the subject for now, "Thanks
to you two, we've got a fair amount of information to go on. We know where Antonio is, and which boat is
being loaded up with the arms. On top of
that, we know that they're planning to make the first run in two weeks, so we
know how much time that we have."
"That's great and all,
but we still have no clue about what that move will be,"
Luis remained
unflustered. "True, but I think that it's
obvious that we're gonna have to do. Some time before they make the run, we'll have to highjack the
boat. Problem is,
there are two things that we don't know: one, where the rest of the contraband
is being stored, and two, when we'd have the best chance at gaining control of
the boat. Now, the first problem isn't
all that important, since the police will probably be able to find that out
alright, especially if we're able to take one of them with us. But, I don't know how we're gonna solve the
second problem."
They all stood in
confounded silence for a minute, until Hank got an idea. "Say, Luis, I'm pretty sure they couldn't
actually see our faces. Maybe Gwen and I
can hang around the harbor again, this time at a good distance though, and see
if we can find Antonio alone; he might know something. I doubt they're guarding him that closely,
since they know he won't do anything that he thinks might risk your or
Luis let out a low
whistle. "I don't know, Hank; you'd be
taking a big risk, you'd better know that."
"What do you say,
Gwen?" Hank asked. "Are you willing to
chance it?
Gwen thought for a
second. Sure, it'd be dangerous, but so
was everything else about this mission they were on. "Yeah, let's do it."
"Okay, if you two are
really willing to take this risk, I suppose it could turn out to be a big
help." Luis had given up trying to
argue: everyone around him really was crazy, and he'd just have to accept it. Sensing that the new couple probably didn't
want to be surrounded by a bunch of people, he continued, "Well, if that's
everything for now, I guess we're done.
The meeting over, and Sheridan and Luis
departed, Hank sat down next to Gwen on her bed. "So, Gwen, since we rushed out of that motel
so fast earlier, we haven't really had a chance to talk about what happened
last night."
Gwen sighed, knowing
that this conversation was inevitable. "What is there to talk about?"
Hank
raised an eyebrow in her direction. "We
got married, Gwen, and then, well, we
had a wedding night, which was amazing, by the way," his eyes twinkled a little
as we said this last bit. "But, we've
gotta decide what to do now. Do we try
and make it work, or call it a mistake and get it taken care of so we can go on
with our lives."
Gwen chose her next
words carefully. She knew her hasty
decision to elope had been ill-advised, and that was an enormous
understatement. And now, this man
sitting right next to her was her husband. Husband. That word sounded strange, even without saying it out loud; in her
heart, she'd never imagined that term applying to anyone but Ethan. Somehow, though, it didn't quite feel wrong,
and she truly didn't know whether or not she regretted marrying Hank. She supposed that, in the end, she wouldn't
know until their adventure was over, but, as she reminded herself
pragmatically, the death of one or both of them would most likely make this all
a moot point.
Laying her head on his
chest, Gwen frowned doubtfully. "I
thought we agreed not to talk about any of this now, to just take it one moment
at a time."
"Yeah, I know we did,
but," Hank started to object, but was halted by Gwen, who reached out with her
hands and gently pulled him down into a long, slow kiss.
"No questions?" she
whispered when they pulled apart for a second.
"No questions," he
conceded, gazing into her eyes hungrily, and drew her down onto the bed with
him.
*****
Charity ran into the
Bennett living room, her face tormented by the vision she'd just had. Everyone else was already there, for some
reason or another. John was there,
playing checkers with Miguel. David had
been at the house, but, as was increasingly usual for him, some mysterious
business was forcing him ti leave. Sam busied himself reading the paper. Grace and Jessica were pouring
over bridal magazines in order to give Charity ideas. Laura sat with them, half paying attention, though she was really occupied with the amazingly
gaudy painting Grace had just bought to hang above the fireplace. A big,
cheerful chicken, Laura thought, revolted but unable to take her eyes off
of it. My God, she actually made a chicken painting the centerpiece of the
whole room. It was incredible; in
her experience, only Rebecca Hotchkiss had taste this atrocious. She
couldn't just get a nice Renoir or Van Gogh print? My old art history teacher would have a heart
attack if he could see this.
At the sight of Charity so distressed, Grace and
Miguel rushed instantly over to her, and began the familiar comforting
ritual. "Something REALLY horrible is
going to happen, I'm sure of it," Charity declared. This time, though, she wouldn't stand for any
attempts to talk away what she'd seen. "No, sorry, but there's no way I'm wrong. There was something else, though; I got the
feeling that there's actually something I can do this time, but I really think
that I've got to get married as soon as possible!"
"What?" asked Grace,
not following her niece.
"Huh?" said Miguel,
totally lost by this point.
"If we don't get
married as soon as possible, we never will," Charity insisted.
"I don't get it
Charity, but if you want to get married right away, that's fine with me,"
Miguel assured her placidly.
"How soon do you want
to?" Grace asked.
"Do you think we can
have things ready in a few days, Aunt Grace?"
Grace took in a sharp
breath. She hadn't expected it to be
quite that soon, but the urgency of
Charity's inquiry prompted her to answer in the affirmative. "I think we can just manage it. But, I'm warning you, it won't be anything
fancy at all—"
Charity hugged Grace
fiercely, her mood greatly uplifted. "Oh, thank you! And, I don't care
if it's simple."
Charity then approached
Laura and Jessica. "I don't know what
came over me, yesterday. I was going to
ask you sooner, but Jessica, will you be my maid of honor?"
Jessica smiled,
flattered. "Of course I will!"
"Thank you so much,"
Charity responded sweetly. "And, Laura,
I know we haven't exactly known each other that long, but I'd really like you
to be a bridesmaid. I understand if you
don't want to—"
Although Laura still
thought this whole thing was demented, she couldn't say no to such a sincerely
made request. "I'd love to, Charity."
"Oh, I'm so happy! Let's see, I'll also ask Simone, and Kay if I
can get a hold of her…" and Charity trailed off, her uneasiness quickly
forgotten as her mind filled with preparations for the wedding she just knew had to take place immediately.
As soon as she could,
Grace once again pulled Laura aside, ignoring the fairly infuriated expression
that was plain on Sam's face. "Laura,
are you planning on using being a bridesmaid as a way to get closer to Miguel?"
Grace asked seriously.
Laura had only been
this irritated once or twice in her life. "No! Do you want me to tell her I
can't do it, because I will if you insist like this!"
Grace stared at her in
disbelief. "Of course
not! This is Charity's special
day and she should have anybody that she wants there, and if she wants you to
be a bridesmaid, then you should do it."
Laura rolled her
eyes. Charity's special day. It wasn't that she disliked Charity; true, her was often
incredibly annoying, but she was also one of the most truly good and kind
people Laura had ever met, and she didn't realize how tiring she could be. Laura suspected that if she could be made to
understand how everyone else was pushed aside for her, she'd be horrified. "Alright, then, I don't see a problem. I'm going to be a bridesmaid, and you want me
to be a bridesmaid. Isn't that the end
of it?"
Grace searched for
exactly the right words. "It's your
motive that's troubling me. Yesterday,
you seemed against it, and now you're part of the wedding."
"I'm part of the
wedding because Charity asked me,"
Laura explained evenly, grateful that she had, over the years, become an expert
at not losing her temper. "Now, I may
think that they're making a mistake, but it's their choice, and it's none of my
business. I was taken by surprise
yesterday, that's all."
"I wish I could believe
you."
"And why can't you?"
Laura fumed. "Why do you just assume
that I'm up to something devious here? Okay, I'm new, I get that, but would you have automatically suspected
John or Charity like this?"
Grace pursed her lips
into a bitchy scowl. "This isn't about
Charity or John, Laura."
When Laura gave her
reply, it was in a tone not vindictive, nor accusative, but that of a judge
calmly evaluating the value of a testimony versus the previously established
evidence. "As near as I can tell,
Mother, it's always about them, in some way or another. The whole reason we're having this argument
is that you've somehow gotten stuck on the idea that I've become a roadblock on
the path to Charity's happiness, and nothing I can say is going to change your
mind. Now, I'm not asking you to treat
me the way you do those two; we've only known each other a few weeks, after
all. However, I would like the same
chance you'd give anybody else."
"I do not favor anybody here, and who do you
think you are to accuse me of something like that?"
"I am your daughter,"
Laura said simply, now more weary of this whole conversation than she was
angry. "I know you'd rather I wasn't,
for various reasons, but here we are, whether we like it or not. I realize I don't fit in here, no more than I
did in my old life, nor any more than it sounds like Kay belonged in this
house. I can get along without a mother;
I managed pretty well before, but I'd rather not have you as an enemy for as
stupid a reason as this. I'm going to go
now, but before I do, I just want to give you some advice: why don't you pay
some attention to Jessica?"
Grace narrowed her
eyes. "What does Jessica have to do with
this?"
"Oh,
nothing directly. I don't care so
much, as long as I'm left alone, but your favoring Charity and John is really
hurting her deeply."
Grace was about to
protest, but Laura cut her off. "Oh, she
won't let you see it, but don't you know her well enough to see that that's
just her way of dealing? She loves them,
but this feeling of invisibility is slowly killing her, or driving her crazy,
or both."
Grace was dumbfounded
for a good long moment, as she began to be pricked by little inklings of doubt
and guilt. Unwilling to admit her
possible culpability, she brushed off Laura's words. "Well, I've got to admit it; you're very
clever in a pinch. So, I'll go and focus
on Jessica, who's perfectly fine, leaving you free to pursue Miguel."
If Grace had slapped
Laura across the face with every ounce of her strength, she could not have
stung her daughter more. "No, that's not
the reason! Jessica really loves you,
and she's in pain, and I told you this because I happen to like her, not to
further some scheme of mine. I don't
know what I've done to make you think I'm like that."
With a critically
wounded dignity, Laura walked up the stairs, leaving Grace to tell herself that
she didn't ignore Jessica or hold her son and niece on a pedestal. Sam, meanwhile, could only glare at his wife,
witnessing a side of her that he never had seen before, and which he did not
like at all.
*****
"Mi hija, you know I can't accept this," Pilar declared as Theresa,
carrying Ethan Martin, opened the door to the brand new Lopez-Fitzgerald home.
"Yes, of course you
can, Mama," Theresa replied, dragging her mother around on a tour of the
house. "I know you're going to go on and
on about 'evil Crane money,' but really, after working for them all these
years, don't you deserve it?" Theresa was
ecstatic to be able to do this for her family, and only wished that she could
have brought the rest of them here for the grand unveiling, but with Luis and
Antonio missing, Paloma still living in Mexico, and Miguel in permanent
residence at the Bennett house and attached to Charity at the hip, only her
mother was available.
"You're right, I am going to go on and on about not
taking Crane money," Pilar insisted, refusing to be impressed by the nice size
and tasteful décor of the place. "It's
tainted by evil, just like the family, and I only wish there was a way for you
to break free of them."
Theresa became silent
for a second, and Pilar was instantly sorry that she had said that. "You know I wish I could too, Mama, but you
also know that I can't," she said quietly, cuddling her baby. "And, the Cranes aren't all bad.
Smiling in spite of
herself, Pilar patted her grandson's head. "Of course I don't. There are
some good Cranes, but that doesn't mean that their money isn't evil."
Theresa rolled her
eyes. "You raised us on Crane money,
Mama."
"That's different. I came by that through honest work."
"Well, after all that
they have done to our family, don't you think that they owe us a place to
live? And besides," Theresa smiled the
smile of one who knew she was delivering the clincher to an irrefutable
argument, "you've been living at Grace's Bed and Breakfast. Do you know how much money you must be losing
her? Can you really do that, take up a
room, two rooms when Luis is there, indefinitely and for free?"
"No, I can't," Pilar
said slowly.
"Well, then, wouldn't
you rather live here, in a house under your own name, than in the Crane mansion
itself? And, who knows, now that the
family has a house again, maybe Paloma can come home."
"That would be
wonderful," Pilar admitted. "Oh,
alright, Theracita, you win. I'll accept
your gift."
"Thank you!" Theresa
squealed happily. "Now, if you'll just
let me convince you to give up this job of yours—"
Pilar shook her head
and crossed her arms, indicating that there would be no more concessions on her
part. "No, I am keeping my position as
head housekeeper. You're wasting your
time trying o convince me otherwise."
"Okay," Theresa
conceded, deciding to pick her battles. "So,
do you like how everything looks?"
"I love it. The house is absolutely beautiful. You must've spent so much time picking
everything out."
Theresa took a seat on
the living room sofa, and beckoned her mother to sit down with her. "I had a blast doing it. It was a great diversion. Speaking of which," Theresa's eyes now shone
with a slightly maniacal gleam, "I'm trying to find the perfect way to bring
down Ivy, and I thought that you might have some good ideas."
Pilar backed off,
startled that her daughter would ask such a thing. "No, I don't, and I wouldn't tell you if I
did. You should be ashamed of yourself,
for plotting like this!"
Theresa was completely
floored. "Me ashamed?! After everything she's done to me? I don't think so!"
"That doesn't mean you
have to sink down to her level. Anyways,
I've noticed a change in her. I think
she's feeling guilty about everything she's done."
Theresa was not swayed
whatsoever. "Don't tell me her acting
somewhat nicer is actually fooling you! Oh, she's behaving different, all right, but that's only because she's
up to something."
Pilar sighed. How could she get her daughter to listen to
her without revealing that Ivy was suffering from amnesia? "Whatever it is, can't you just show some
dignity and not resort to all this scheming and manipulation?"
"Don't you see, Mama,
I'm doing this for my own protection. Both Ivy and Rebecca have it in for me, and for myself and my son, I'd
better get them before they get me."
*****
"What's going on here?"
David asked as he entered Kay's room, though the sick pit in his stomach told
him that he already knew the answer. Ivy
was sitting near the door in her wheelchair as Kay busied herself by drawing a
fairly elaborate diagram out of some chalky substance on the hardwood
floor. Even before Ivy started
explaining it to him, he knew that they were about to perform the spell that
would bring Ivy Crane back into the world.
"Are you sure you want
to go through with this?" he asked earnestly, after Ivy told him about the
uncertainties and dangers of the spell. "There could be terrible consequences."
Ivy's countenance was a
picture of nervous resolve. "Do you
really think things could turn out worse
than they are now?" she asked, laughing weakly.
"I guess not," David
murmured, wondering if he'd have the strength to stick around and watch the
woman he loved disappear, to be replaced by his worst
enemy. Finally deciding that he just
couldn't up and leave right now, he kneeled down beside her, yearning
desperately to tell her how he felt, but recognizing the folly that such an
action at this time would be.
"Is there anything I
can do to help?" David asked, looking into the depths of Ivy's mesmerizing blue
eyes, as if for the last time. In a way,
after all, it was; who knew if he would ever again see just that indescribable
something ever again that marked them indisputably as belonging to Ivy
Winthrop?
"No, David, I'm just about done," Kay scowled
at him, looking up from her drawing. "Thanks for the offer," she added in a tone of voice dripping with an
insincerity bordering on sarcasm.
A worry line creased
Ivy's brow. She'd evidently been
noticing this change in Kay who, even at the best of times, was not the most
agreeable girl around. Now, the young
Crane heir seemed to be getting more disagreeable (and somehow scarier) every
time he saw her, a tendency which seemed to be bothering her (is 'future' the
proper term in this case?) mother, though there wasn't much she could do about
it at present.
"Say, David," Ivy
started, looking at him apprehensively.
"Yes, Ivy?"
"It's just that, well,
you've done a lot for me during this whole mess, and I'd just like thank you
while I have the chance."
David smiled. "It was nothing, Ivy."
Ivy shook her head
adamantly. "No, it wasn't. I was your enemy, and you really helped me
when I needed someone. I know Kay was
blackmailing you into it, but you did so much more than you had to, and I'm
grateful for it."
David cupped his hands
over hers. "I was happy to do it. Yes, I did, and still do, hate the other you,
but that's not how I feel about you." He
slowly bent his head down and chastely kissed the back of her right hand,
though as he did so, an electric shock seemed to reverberate all through his
body.
If Ivy felt a similar
sensation, she didn't show it, although his gesture did bring a slight smile to
her face. "Thank you, David. I don't know what the other me had on you, or what you might've done in the past, but
whatever it might have been, I know that you're a good man. I hope that, afterwards, that I don't keep on
blackmailing you, but I might, and if I do, I just want to say that I'm sorry
for it, and that—"
But whatever else Ivy
wanted to say would forever remain a mystery, because an impatient Kay
interrupted, having finished her preparation. Once again spreading some kind of goo on each of Ivy's cheeks, Kay said,
"There, it's all set. All that's left is
to actually say the words. David, you
can stay if you like, but don't distract me in any way."
David nodded, and Ivy
rolled over to the position which Kay indicated. Kay herself stood across from Ivy, mentally
preparing herself to cast an enchantment. Finally she commandingly spoke the words,
For That One
Once Made Younger, By Magicks So Bold
Bring the Soul
From the Ether, Now Make This One Old!
Once again, a white
cloud enveloped the room, making sight impossible. David kept his focus locked on the spot of
Ivy's wheelchair, struggling to make something out. Slowly, the smoke dissipated, and Ivy became
visible again, though David's heart stopped when he saw that her head was
hanging limply down, and she was lying perfectly
still.
"Oh God, Kay," he
whispered, thoroughly horrified. "You've
killed her!"
Kay shook her
head. "No, I haven't. The same thing happened last time. Look at her face; the streaks have
disappeared. The spell worked, though
what that means exactly, we have no way of knowing until she wakes up."
Cautiously, the two
moved closer to the unconscious figure, waiting with baited breath until,
finally, the woman opened her eyes, and began examining her surroundings.
*****
While waiting for the
spell to be performed, Ivy tried not to think about what it would be like to
wake up afterwards. If she had been
pressed, however, she would have expected all memory of the past couple of
weeks to be blotted out, as the soul of Ivy Crane reclaimed control over the
body. What actually happened though, was something else entirely.
When Ivy's eyes opened,
a flood of experiences rushed over her, threatening to overwhelm her
overcrowded mind. In what seemed like an
eternity, but was in reality only a few seconds, she desperately tried to sort
everything out, to gain some coherent idea of what the hell was going on. When she could make some sense of it, she
realized that she could remember everything. In fact, not only was her entirely life up until the original spell now
known to her, but she could also recall, to her surprise, the entirety of the
interim period as Ivy Winthrop. If she
had had time to dwell on this fact, she probably would have found herself
wrapped up in an identity crisis of sorts, but as it was, she was soon
distracted by Kay's worried questioning.
"Mom? Is that you? Can you remember who you are, or who I am? How much do you remember? Do you—"
"Kay," Ivy laughed,
"easy now. Yes, I remember everything,
my entire life. Your spell worked."
Profound relief and
happiness was clearly written on Kay's face, and she hugged her mother
fiercely, murmuring, "I'm so sorry for everything, Mom, I'm so sorry."
"It's
okay, Kay," Ivy whispered, wondering to herself if it was. She didn't know how to feel about anything
anymore. Although she could clearly
remember being Ivy Crane, and everything she had done as her, somehow she felt
different about it all, embarrassment and shame just beginning to creep up on
her.
"I'm so glad," Kay
began, after they parted. "I was so
afraid that it wouldn't work and that I'd make everything worse. How does it feel right now?"
"Strange," Ivy replied,
taking another look around her, her eyes resting for a time on David, as an odd
mixture of gratitude and guilt swept over her. "I remember everything that happened in between the spells, what it was
like not having any memory of over half of my life."
Kay looked taken
aback. "Really? I didn't think it would work that way, though
I guess it all makes sense if you think about it. Say, I was wondering, now that you're back
and everything, do you want to try something else to get Sam Bennett back. I'll be more careful this time, do a lot more
research, but I really think we'd be able to do something that could turn the
trick."
Ivy stared at her
daughter in shock. She had thought,
hoped at least, that such a disastrous experiment would convince Kay to give up
on this dabbling of hers. Looking into
Kay's eyes, though, Ivy could tell that, although she felt bad about this one
incident, she had not learned her lesson. Furthermore, Ivy Crane was now absolutely certain about that chill in
the girl's demeanor that Ivy Winthrop thought she had detected. Even at a moment like this, when Kay was
overcome with positive, caring emotions, Ivy could feel something darker, more
deadly about her than she had been able to before the first spell. Something had happened to her in the
intervening period which she had not been privy to, of that Ivy was sure. "No, I don't think so, not after this," Ivy
finally replied.
"Alright," Kay
shrugged. "It's understandable that you
wouldn't want to." Then, looking at her
wristwatch and gaping in surprise at the hour, made to leave. "I'm really sorry, I wish I didn't have to go
now, but there's somewhere really important that I have to get to right
now. I'll see you later, and we can talk
more then."
On that mysterious
pronouncement, Kay hurried off leaving David and Ivy alone. For a long time they remained in an
uncomfortable silence, neither knowing what to say, until David finally pulled
up a chair and sat next to Ivy. "So, you
really do remember everything, Ivy?"
"Yes, I do," Ivy
answered, not looking him directly in the eyes. This is stupid, she suddenly
thought to herself. True, I wasn't myself for a while, but that doesn't mean anything has
to change. Calling up her inner
bitch, she suddenly glared at David in a desperate attempt to reclaim her old
ferocity. "But you'd better not think
for a second that it's going to be any different now, David. Just because you
played suck-up while I was down for the count doesn't mean that you're getting
off the hook. In fact, we've got a lot
of lost time to make up for now, so you're going to work harder than ever at
breaking Sam and Grace up." Ivy
had a good deal more to say, but was stopped short when she happened to glance
at him and caught a look, not of anger or exasperation, but of hurt, and maybe
even sadness in his eyes. She couldn't
go on; everything she had been trying to repress suddenly assaulted her again
full force. She remembered how many
times she had blackmailed him, only now, against her will, she felt absolutely
horrible about it.
Ivy recalled, in rapid
procession and with a painfully acute accuracy, the rising horror she had felt
at discovering each and every terrible thing that she had done: her
blackmailing of David, her increasingly despicable schemes to win Sam back, all
the times she had threatened Eve, even going so far as to have her daughter
drugged, and, last but certainly not least, her complete and utter willingness
to act as an accomplice in the attempted murder of Theresa. In a moment of awful clarity, it hit her just
what a horrible person she really was, and furthermore, just how much she hated
being this way, and how much she hated that she hated being this way.
She broke down,
startling David, and heaved out a series of low, wretched sobs as she struggled
with this new epiphany. "I'm sorry,
David, for everything I've done, you're free."
David raised his
eyebrows; this was the last thing he expected to her after her previous
tirade. "Free?"
"Yes, I've given
up. You don't have to go through with
any of this. I won't do anything to you
if you stop now."
Not knowing what to say
or do, David awkwardly tried to pat her on the back, while he replied, "Thank
you, but I don't really know where that came from."
"I just can't do this
anymore," Ivy confessed miserably. "I
want to be able to so badly, but I just can't. Before, I could scheme and threaten, and I felt nothing. Not a single thing. Now, though, it's like I can remember what
it's like to have a real conscience, and it's killing me."
David of course felt
sorry for Ivy, but nevertheless found it necessary to hide his joy when he
realized that she hadn't just reverted back to the person she had been. "At least this means that you do have one
now."
Ivy laughed
bitterly. "God, how I wish I
didn't. I'd give anything to just not
feel this way right now. I want to go
back to how I was, but wanting to just makes me hate myself even more. Who am I right now, anyway? I'm different than I was before, somehow, but
what exactly has changed?"
Try as he might, David
himself could not find an answer to Ivy's frantic questions. He himself didn't know who it was before him,
although he did know that, whoever it was, he was still in love with her. That wasn't relevant at the moment, however,
so he sat there, wishing that he could do something to help, but knowing that
what Ivy really needed was time to come to terms with her dilemma for herself.
