Chapter two:
Satan, Hell, and Eden
I mentioned earlier something about my chemistry phase. This is important because it is thanks to chemistry that Satan is in charge of hell and I can no longer get a flametan there.
Well, during my chem phase, I did quite a few experiments. Most of them on my pet rat, Lucifer. Well. This didn't do too much for him, as I was omnipotent, any powers I inadvertently gave him I could simply zap away.
I'm not entirely sure which of us pushed the bookcase, but before I could zap away Lucifer's latest transformation, the bookcase with all my chemistry books was falling to earth, and Lucifer had winged his way down to hell.
It's time to explain what Lucifer, who changed his name to Satan, looks like. He still retains the image of a rat with only a few differences. He's one big rat, with huge fucking wings, and instead of a tail, something that even porn stars can't talk about without vomiting. Come to think of it, looking at Satan's backside makes me vomit to. But I'll summon it and try to explain it to you. Grab a bucket, here it goes.
For you girls out there, imagine you had three large boobs sticking out of your vagina, and your vagina was where your ass is now. This would look a little like what Satan has instead of a tail. Just a hell of a lot bigger, with a huge fucking penis sticking out of the center (sorry, I had to get my perv fix). Ladies and gentleman, give a big hello to the queen bitch known as Satan.
Now, how does all this tie into the Garden of Eden? Well, we mustn't forget the bookcase speeding like a fucking superman clone into the ball of god snot. Guess where it just happened to land. Hello tree of knowledge.
I warned the fallen angels (humans) that this was big stuff and they shouldn't touch it. But when have you humans ever listened to me. I tell a guy down in Texas to warn everyone about the whole North Korea nuclear missile shit, and you lock him up. There's gratitude for ya. So, despite the fact that they couldn't even reach the second shelf on there without a step ladder, the managed to grab a book with the aid of a grappling hook. I take this opportunity to remind you to thank your chemistry teacher for kicking you out of paradise next time you see him.
I mentioned earlier something about my chemistry phase. This is important because it is thanks to chemistry that Satan is in charge of hell and I can no longer get a flametan there.
Well, during my chem phase, I did quite a few experiments. Most of them on my pet rat, Lucifer. Well. This didn't do too much for him, as I was omnipotent, any powers I inadvertently gave him I could simply zap away.
I'm not entirely sure which of us pushed the bookcase, but before I could zap away Lucifer's latest transformation, the bookcase with all my chemistry books was falling to earth, and Lucifer had winged his way down to hell.
It's time to explain what Lucifer, who changed his name to Satan, looks like. He still retains the image of a rat with only a few differences. He's one big rat, with huge fucking wings, and instead of a tail, something that even porn stars can't talk about without vomiting. Come to think of it, looking at Satan's backside makes me vomit to. But I'll summon it and try to explain it to you. Grab a bucket, here it goes.
For you girls out there, imagine you had three large boobs sticking out of your vagina, and your vagina was where your ass is now. This would look a little like what Satan has instead of a tail. Just a hell of a lot bigger, with a huge fucking penis sticking out of the center (sorry, I had to get my perv fix). Ladies and gentleman, give a big hello to the queen bitch known as Satan.
Now, how does all this tie into the Garden of Eden? Well, we mustn't forget the bookcase speeding like a fucking superman clone into the ball of god snot. Guess where it just happened to land. Hello tree of knowledge.
I warned the fallen angels (humans) that this was big stuff and they shouldn't touch it. But when have you humans ever listened to me. I tell a guy down in Texas to warn everyone about the whole North Korea nuclear missile shit, and you lock him up. There's gratitude for ya. So, despite the fact that they couldn't even reach the second shelf on there without a step ladder, the managed to grab a book with the aid of a grappling hook. I take this opportunity to remind you to thank your chemistry teacher for kicking you out of paradise next time you see him.