Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing. I am making no money from this.

Self-Insert Saga - Gundam Wing

By Kynthia, Cricket, and Coley

Chapter 5

A dark figure crept stealthily around the corner. Well, not so stealthily since said figure was humming the pink panther theme song.

Da da da dun, dun, dun, dun da da da dum dum dum dum da da na na naaaaaaaaa nananaaaaaaaaa do do do do do do do dooo do do da da!

On the other side of the corner another darkly clad semi-stealthy figure also crept and hummed the pink panther theme.

Suddenly the two figures collided, with a muffled crashing sound and mutual oof's. The first figure sat up and pulled of a ski mask revealing a pale face with black hair streaked with blue and wide blue eyes.

"You ran into me!" Cricket scream-whispered.

The second figure removed her ski mask to reveal slightly smushed but still spiky really dark blue hair and black eyes. "I did not! You ran into me! What are you doing here anyway?"

"I'm going to kill Kynthia."

"You are not! I'm going to!"

"No! You got to kill Bulma, I wanna kill somebody!"

"So kill Relena!"

"I was going to, but she got a lawn gnome in the mail and took off. I took that as my chance to escape. She was making me wear pink!"

Suddenly, a third voice butted in. Kynthia had heard the commotion while in the process of brushing her teeth and stuck her head out the door, toothbrush still hanging out of her mouth. "What the hell is going on?"

Coley and Cricket both turned to look. They looked back at each other. When they faced Kynthia again there were evil grins in their proper place.

Kynthia blanched. "Oh shit."

The two blue-haired girls pounced.

~~~~~~

Kynthia awoke to find herself taped to a chair with electric ? tape. "Hey guys," she called out, "aren't we duct-tape villains?"

Cricket walked in. Her eyes did the anime-tear thing. "But… but.. Electric tape is BLACK!"

"Oh. Ok. Can you un-tape me now?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"We still haven't decided who's going to kill you yet."

"Oh." She fell silent. Then, "Can't we do something fun? Like build a Gundam? Or randomly find one?"

"Hmm…. You know, I distinctly remember wishing for Gundams. I wonder where they could be." Mysteriously the location of a Gundam appeared in her mind. "Holy crap! That was cool. I wonder what else I don't know that I know!"

"Hn."

"O.o! We could find the pilots too! And torture them by beating their Gundams into metal-y pulps!"

"I already saw Wufei."

"And I saw Trowa. What's that got to do with anything?"

Cricket got the anime tear eyes again. Oh where was her beloved Duo?!

Kynthia quickly stepped in. She wasn't in the mood. "So where is this Gundam at?"

"I'm not telling you! You OZ suck up traitor! Find your own!"

"Fine I will!"

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

Coley rolled her eyes and briefly wondered if she had a Gundam. The location of hers magically appeared. Kind of like the way cocoa puffs turn milk brown. She began searching the cabin they had 'borrowed' for a shovel.

Kynthia was watching curiously. 'How come they get a Gundam and I don't? I want one!' She waited for the location to magically appear. Nothing happened. "Dammit! Where's my freakin Gundam?" Her mind responded as if terrified of her. "That's much more like it!" Command of OZ had obviously gone to her head. Literally.

And yet more terror is unleashed upon the universe.

"Hey!" Kynthia screamed, "you can't end the chapter with me still taped to this damn chair!"

Authoress (Cricket) snickers. "Well hmm… you only tortured me with Relena for a whole chapter. What else did you expect?" Fingers are snapped. Said tape disappears.

AHEM

And yet more terror is unleashed upon the universe.

To be continued…