"Still Bound", chapter 7
by BonnieD
Last chapter: Buffy thought she'd identified her secret benefactor. Willow was naughty with Tara's mind. Spike counseled both Xander and Buffy (not together). This chapter: Everybody sings a lot. Secrets come out. If you've lost track of the timeline, it's still spring even though the events of season six have begun to unwind.
Beautiful beta Zyrya is struggling with her writing project. If you've read "Crash," you'll know that what comes from her pen is bound to be good. If you've haven't read "Crash," do so now (sorry I can't provide a link, ff.net doesn't allow) and then give her encouragement to keep on with her work.
*************
"That's it! Vampires, demons, hellhounds and flesh-eating zombies I can take. That's my job. But this weird time-shifty stuff that's been screwing with my head all week is just too much. I can't deal. And now it's all with the dancing and singing and everyone's making atrocious rhymes!" Buffy entered the Magic Box for the first time since the day that wouldn't end and found the others already assembled and mulling over the latest "virus" to infect Sunnydale.
"I know. I couldn't get my Breakfast Burrito this morning until I'd listened to the complete Ode to the Doublemeat Medley performed by Stan at the drive up window," Xander commiserated. "That was a wacky start to my day."
"Hey, don't knock the Doublemeat. Looks like fast food is in my near career future. I start next week," Buffy said.
"Do you get an employee discount?" Anya enquired. "You and Dawn can eat really cheaply if you work it right."
"Buffy are you sure you want to work for a corporation that is based on the slaughter of innocent animals?" Tara asked gently.
"I'm not saying I'm going to love it," Buffy replied. "But it will get some cash flow into the house while I look for something better." She shrugged. "Anyway, back to the ongoing musical ... what do you suppose that's all about?"
"I've got a theory," Giles began and the others tunefully joined in with their own hypotheses.
*********
Willow held back on the group sing, mortified that anyone might hear her off-key croaking and afraid that the truth about her forgetting spell might come out and undo all the progress she'd made with Tara. She wished again that she had never told Buffy about Miss Kitty's resurrection. If necessary she would perform the memory spell on her friend too, but for now Buffy was so wrapped up in her own life she appeared to have forgotten what Willow had told her. Typical! A spell the magnitude of a resurrection was something to be praised for and all Willow had received was Tara's stunned dismay and Buffy's casual disregard. Thank goddess, Giles hadn't found out. She would have received a tongue-lashing from him for sure.
What was so wrong with her getting better, stronger and more knowledgeable in her chosen field? No one faulted Buffy when she colored outside the lines, refused to follow the Council's orders and used her intuition to solve a problem. But Willow, oh no, she was strictly research girl as far as the Scoobies were concerned. They couldn't see her vast potential. They never even looked for it.
The Research Song was over and Willow tuned back in, hitting the books hard until Tara nudged her leg under the table and suggested going home for a particular volume that didn't exist. Willow enthusiastically agreed and soon the lovers were out in the beautiful, sunshiny day, prancing through the park and falling into their bed together. Tara had such a gorgeous voice, it made Willow's heart race to hear the love trembling in every word of her song.
As she sank between her lover's thighs with a contented sigh, Willow was convinced more than ever that she'd been right to smooth over the little spat between them with magic. Anything that could bring this joy, this bliss, could only be of the good, right?
************
Xander watched Anya go through her nightly beauty regimen; hair receiving exactly 120 strokes with a soft bristle brush, lotion liberally applied to all elbows, knees and heels, and tonight some weird blue herb poultice Tara had given her to reduce fine lines and wrinkles was lathered across her face. Hm. That meant no nookie. Anya wasn't in the mood when she wasn't looking her best.
Xander sighed and shifted back in bed, hands clasped behind his head. This was it. Much as admitting it felt like battery acid in the eye, Spike was right. This was what life was all about: end of a hard day's work and your beautiful honey getting ready to cuddle beside you to sleep, to hold you and be your friend and companion forever and ever.
As he felt Anya's weight settle on the mattress next to him, Xander licked his lips and cleared his throat. "Wait! Don't turn out the light yet. An, I have something I want to say."
Only he didn't say it so much as sing it with growing dismay as each verse poured unbidden from his mouth.
Xander's Doubts "Anya, I have something big to tell ya. I'd really like for you to be my bride. But Anya, there are issues I must spell ya. Things that I keep deeply locked inside.... Like... Did you know I killed my best pal Jesse? Even though he wasn't human at the time It tore me up and shaped my hate of demons. It's really hard to tell you this in rhyme,
But sometimes when we're lying close together And I think, "This is my girl so soft and warm," Remembering the creature that you once were I fear that you'll take back your demon form.
Then there are my issues with my father A man I never want to emulate But I'm told sons often turn out like their fathers And don't know if I can e'er escape my fate.
I also have some problems with self-image Years of getting crapped on helped shape that. And pals like powerful witches and a Slayer Make me feel dumb, clumsy, useless and quite fat.
I hope you understand my hesitation To pledge my troth and walk you down the aisle, Spike said I should just do it and be grateful So I choke my fears and hide behind a smile.
But Anya, I still loooove ya, And will marry you, if you want it too," he warbled.
"This is a proposal?!" Anya cried, jumping up from the bed. "Thanks for nothing, Harris!" She slammed the bathroom door behind her as she left.
Xander was humiliated. He'd truly meant to propose to her. It was horrible to have his deepest anxieties and dreads reduced to a few catchy phrases that couldn't begin to sum up the complexity of his emotions. The snatches of songs he'd heard all over town today suddenly seemed heartbreaking instead of amusing. No one deserved to have their feelings so belittled and dismissed.
He was just damn grateful the song hadn't included a verse about the fact that his deepest buried fantasy included himself, Anya and Spike in a threesome.
**********
The next evening Dawn assured an obviously upset Tara that she would be fine alone, and then watched her friend, clutching some type of dried weed, scurry distractedly out the front door.
Silence settled on the house, magnifying the drip of a faucet and the creak of wood expanding and contracting in the newly repaired stairwell.
Dawn was getting used to the quiet since she spent so much time alone now that Glory was no longer a threat. It would be great when Willow and Tara moved in at the end of term. Half their stuff was already in mom's old room. Dawn would love having them here, especially at night when Buffy went patrolling. Of course, Dawn had told her sister she was way too old for a babysitter, which she was, but it still got kind of lonely and creepy night after night.
Dawn wandered up to her room and, closing the door carefully behind her, got out her Secret Box. It held a jumble of jewelry, old Barbie shoes, a rabbit's foot, special stones, one of Buffy's old lipsticks, shells and sea- glass she'd picked up at the beach, and just lately it held a number of trinkets with price tags still attached which she'd shoplifted from stores all over town.
Suddenly the young girl felt a swelling in her throat. It was that choked up feeling you get just before you bawl your eyes out, but instead of crying she found herself bursting into song...
Dawn' Lament I'm an orphan. No one feels my pain. My sister's the Slayer. Try living up to that! I used to be a Key. At least then I was special. Now I'm nothing and we're really poor besides. If I sometimes take things, can you be surprised? Janice has so much crap, and I have squat. I don't even get a good song. I hate unstructured verse.
Woe is me. I'm a misunderstood teen. Woe is me. I wish I had a boyfriend. Woe is me. I think Spike's really hot. Woe is me. He only has eyes for Buffy. My life sucks!
Luckily her song was cut short as two Howdy-Doody-style minions burst into the room and gagged the teen, then dragged her away.
**********
Buffy walked toward the Magic Box, hands jammed in her pockets, head down, thinking about what had just happened in Spike's crypt.
Earlier in the week she had told the vampire she was sick of constantly tripping over him and couldn't he please find someone else to stalk. But when he followed her command and actually stayed out of her way the past few days, she found she missed his company.
So tonight she had gone, ostensibly to see if he knew anything about the rampant musicality around town, but actually to check up on him. After inviting her in and settling her with a cup of herbal tea in his ratty old armchair, he had listened to her complain about the time shifting and job disasters she had suffered. He agreed with Giles that it sounded like someone was testing her abilities and said he'd keep an eye out for that black van.
Then unexpectedly, he opened his mouth and began to sing in his sexy, smoky baritone and she listened in amazement while her insides melted into a puddle of goo.
It was a beautiful, simple ballad in which he told her, "I'll always be there for you." And he sang it so soulfully that it didn't seem like an "I'll be watching you," kind of stalkery badness but a promise of fidelity that made her ache all over. Damn! Why did this curse or whatever it was have to involve singing? She was such a sucker for a serenade.
The idea of relying on Spike was very seductive, as overwhelmed as she felt these days. She had to guard against it. Letting him into her life would be bad. Very bad. And wrong. Very wrong. Out from under the spell of his voice it was easier to remember that.
She looked up and found herself already in front of the Magic Box with no memory of walking there. She squared her shoulders, shook off her ruminations about Spike and entered the shop.
Willow, who had also just arrived, greeted her with a smile and started chatting on about the hilarious altercation at a fender-bender she'd witnessed that afternoon. As the people involved in the accident had argued in three quarter time, a host of mimes had waltzed in the background.
"You wanna talk surreal ... I've had nightmares that made more sense!"
Tara came down the stairs from the upper level.
"Baby! I didn't know you were here," Willow exclaimed. "I thought you were spending time with Dawn tonight?"
"I - I was." Tara appeared flustered. "I needed to check something out in one of the books here." She lifted her chin and gave Willow an almost defiant stare.
Buffy looked back and forth between Willow and Tara in consternation. Something was happening. She had rarely seen Tara so upset, almost angry. Anger and Tara were not two things you expected to mix 'n' match.
The fact that Willow didn't ask 'what's the matter' let Buffy know that her friend knew perfectly well why Tara was furious and didn't want to open the subject. It must have to do with that Kitty Fantastico fiasco Buffy decided.
The tense silence held a moment longer and was broken when Giles wandered in from the back room at the same moment that Tara, as if making a decision, asked, "Willow. What is this?" and held out a crushed sprig of dried flowers.
"That?" Willow's voice squeaked and she cleared her throat. "It's just ... I found it and thought it was pretty so I, um, put it under your pillow to, uh, give you s-sweet dreams." Her smile wavered.
"It's not a charm?" Tara demanded, searching Willow's eyes with her own. "It's not part of a spell?"
"N-not that I'm aware," Willow's voice trailed off. Her eyes grew wide and she clutched at her throat. She managed to croak out an 'oh no' before she began to sing...
"I Can Make Things Better" "Tara, I can't lie to you, you always see my heart. I want to keep you happy, never drive us apart. I gave you back the pet you loved. Made her alive and strong. But you didn't want the gift I gave. You told me it was wrong.
Why baby, why is it wrong to show I care? It can't be wrong, when I brought some comfort there. Why baby, why is it so hard to see That I am the magic and the magic is me.
I did a little spell last week, so you'd forget our fight And it worked out so good for us, I'm sure that it was right. Haven't we been happy? Hasn't it been swell? With just a tiny shift of mind I made heaven out of hell.
Why baby, why is it wrong to show I care? It can't be wrong, when I brought some comfort there. Why baby, why is it so hard to see That I am the magic and the magic is me.
A shocked silence followed Willow's revelation. Tara was weeping. Buffy was open-mouthed. And Giles looked ready to burst into an apoplectic rage.
"I am aghast, simply aghast, at your cavalier misuse of magic and ... and manipulation of someone's mind. How could you possibly think your actions were correct, Willow? Had you even taken into account the possible long- range effects of performing a resurrection spell? Had you considered the ramifications of...."
The doorbell jangled as Xander, trailed by a listless Anya, breezed in. "What'd we miss?"
The others looked up.
"Holy Mama, what happened?" Xander asked, eyeing their expressions. "Who's been singing?"
**********
A half hour and a Bill of Rights length Giles' rant later, the door opened again. A goofy looking creature with the plasticine head of a marionette was pushed into the room, followed by Spike.
"My master has the Slayer's sister hostage at the Bronze because she summoned him and at midnight he's going to take her to the Underworld to be his queen."
"What does he want?"
The minion pointed at Buffy. "Her." He abruptly pushed Spike to the side and hightailed it out the door, very quickly for such a top heavy being.
"Dawn's in trouble, must be Tuesday," Buffy muttered. "All right, everyone. I'll go in first. See what this Andrew Lloyd Webber Wannabe is all about. The rest of you can back me up, take care of any of his puppet pals that give me trouble."
There was a murmur of agreement. The accusations, questions and reprimands were put aside as everyone grabbed a weapon from the chest in the training room and followed Buffy to the grand finale.
*********
"...I feed off your need and I feast on your greed. This plethora of rancor is the food that I need. If the truth sets you free, then that's where I wanna be As anger, rage and discontent spill their precious seed. My hunger is filled and my spirit is freed."
As he sang, Sweet tapped danced across the stage where Dawn was ensconced in a high backed, throne-like chair.
"Sorry I asked!" Buffy interrupted impatiently after the third verse. "You live off the trouble you stir up. I get it. Pleeease no more choruses."
"What about you, little miss?" Sweet struck a pose, steepling his fingers and cocking his head curiously toward Buffy. "What's your ditty, kitty? Haven't heard much about what makes a Slayer tick"
"Oh no," Buffy shook her head and backed unconsciously away. "Not going there. There's no way I'm going to start telling all my personal busi...."
Before she knew it, Buffy was facing her friends and belting out her big number.
Buffy's Burden "There's something I've been hiding. I was afraid to tell. But keeping it a secret. Has been a taste of hell. I know you're all my friends and you want the best for me That's why I fear to disappoint and let the truth fly free:
But...
I'm pregnant. Though I know it doesn't show. You'll see I'm pregnant, when my belly swells and grows. And yes it's Riley's. Did you think I was a whore? Don't think I'm careless. Sometimes Trojans lose the war.
Interlude: I'm keeping it even though it's wrong. I can barely take care of myself and Dawn. But this life inside is so precious and sweet To one who brings death to every creature she meets.
So... I'm pregnant. You'll be uncle, grandpa, aunts, I'm really pregnant. Already stretching out my pants. Having a baby, isn't in the Slayer game, But I will love it. And I hope you'll do the same."
When her song was finished, Buffy heaved a huge sigh of relief, grateful that it was over without the revelation of her erotic dreams about Spike.
Everyone but Spike looked shell-shocked, gazing at her wide-eyed. He was watching her with a little half-smile on his lips and nodded approvingly when their eyes met. His earlier advice had been right, of course, Buffy felt lighter and better than she had in the past few weeks now that her secret was unburdened.
The nattily dressed demon began to applaud. "Lovely. Mm-mm. Even you humans must be able to taste the delicious emotions stewing in this room." He smacked his lips with pleasure.
Sweet stood and extended a hand to Dawn, who cowered in her chair. "I think my work here is at an end. Come, my queen."
Buffy started forward, fists raising threateningly. "You're leaving all right, but you're not taking Dawn."
"She summoned me. Gave me a chance to play in your world for a little while. Now I'm giving her the opportunity to play in mine. Besides, she's a pretty young thing." The demon stroked Dawn's long, silky hair and she cringed away.
"I didn't!" she swore. "I never ... Buffy, I don't know what he's talking about."
"My talisman, dolly. Round thing about yea big made of silver with lots of fancy writing on it...."
"Oh. OH!" Xander stepped forward, one hand upraised. "In a little blue pouch. Yeah. I found that when I was unpacking a box at the shop. Oh my god, I did this!"
"What on earth are you...." Giles began.
"I was..." Xander blushed, "thinking about the future. Wondering what I should do. I guess I made a wish while I was holding it. But I didn't mean to or anything," he rushed to add. "And I certainly didn't know there'd be singing and dancing involved."
"What did you wish?" Willow asked. "To be punched in the schnoz? Cause that's likely to happen real soon."
"For the truth," Tara said quietly. "He just wished to know truth, Willow." She gave her lover a hard look.
The demon chuckled at their discord then with a sweeping look up and down Xander's body he said, "Sorry baby, not my type," and turned back to Dawn. "As for you, sweetpea," he sighed with regret as he gave her head a final pat, "we would've made such a lovely couple. Ah well."
"What a lotta fun, you guys have been real swell And there's not a one who can say this ended well All those secrets you've been concealing Say you're happy now, once more with feeling, Now I gotta run, see you all in hell."
As his song ended, he disappeared in a swirl of blue smoke. The group watched as it drifted up to the ceiling and dispersed.
"Wow," Dawn commented. "That was ... something." She turned to her sister. "Buffy...."
"Don't even start." Buffy held up a warding hand. "I'm not ready to discuss this. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow. There's been enough sharing for one day."
Anya piped up to anyone who would listen, "You know why this spell didn't affect me, don't you? I mean, yeah I sang and all, but I didn't reveal any embarrassing secrets and do you know why?"
No one asked so she continued on. "Because I don't keep secrets. What you see is what you get. I'm honest and direct and not ashamed of my past like some people." She looked pointedly at Xander. "This should be an object lesson to all of you." She slung her purse over her shoulder and marched toward the door.
Xander looked sheepishly around at them. "I'm really sorry I caused this. Dawn, sorry you got kidnapped ... again."
She shrugged. "Getting used to it. He was less creepy than Harmony, anyway."
With a last apologetic smile and a "You gonna be okay, Buff?" Xander followed Anya's exit from the building.
Red-eyed, Tara gave Buffy's hand a squeeze. "Whenever you're ready," she murmured, "We can talk." Then she too left without looking back at Willow.
"Tara! Wait. I'm sorry," Willow rushed after her.
"Buffy is there anything I can do...." Giles began, walking toward his charge.
She folded her arms over her chest and shook her head. "No. Really Giles, I'm just not ready to discuss it yet. You could see Dawn home for me, though. I want to take care of these dead minions before the Bronze staff comes in tomorrow and gets an eyeful."
"All right then," Giles acquiesced, inclining his head. "Dawn?"
Dawn flounced after him with an angry glare at Buffy as she passed. "You could've told me, you know. I'm your sister for cripes sake. You're supposed to share stuff with me!" She tossed her hair back and walked stiff-legged after Giles.
The Bronze was empty except for Buffy and Spike.
Wandering onto the stage, Buffy sighed and sank down on the throne Dawn had vacated. "Well, that was strange ... and somehow unfinished. I felt like there should have been a big group number at the end there. Weird."
Spike perched on the edge of the stage at her feet. "Know what you mean, love. I thought there might be a final kiss or something of that sort."
"Like 'Moulin Rouge' without the dying," Buffy agreed. "Xander and Anya missed their cue, I guess. And Willow and Tara ... who knows how that will end. I mean where do they go from here?"
"Hm." Spike stood, jumped up on the stage and prowled around for a bit, toying with a mic stand and kicking aside some sheet music that had fluttered to the floor. "'Course," he began, "happy couples aren't popular in today's musicals. But in my day, the fella always got the girl at the end." He stopped behind Buffy's chair, his hands resting on the back of it.
"You went to the theater, Spike?"
"Often." His hands slipped down from the back of the chair to rest lightly on her shoulders. She didn't shrug them off so he began to gently massage.
"Is that where you learned to be such a romantic? Silly Victorian musicals?" She unconsciously leaned back into his strong hands. "How long have you been a vampire now? You should know better. Love never triumphs and the couple always splits."
"Bit cynical for such a young thing aren't you?" he asked, leaning down over the back of the chair so his mouth was near her ear. "Doesn't have to be that way."
She looked over her shoulder at him and found his face was far too close. For a moment she was transfixed by his lips then she sat up stiffly, forcing his hands to drop away from her shoulders. "Doesn't it?" She stood abruptly. "Come on, Spike. Let's take care of business." She leaped off the stage, headed for one of the discarded bodies and seized it under the arms.
He sighed and trudged after her, picking up the heels of the minion. "Rising music and a big romantic kiss would've been more interesting," he muttered as they dragged the super-sized Howdy-Doody out the door.
To be continued....
Last chapter: Buffy thought she'd identified her secret benefactor. Willow was naughty with Tara's mind. Spike counseled both Xander and Buffy (not together). This chapter: Everybody sings a lot. Secrets come out. If you've lost track of the timeline, it's still spring even though the events of season six have begun to unwind.
Beautiful beta Zyrya is struggling with her writing project. If you've read "Crash," you'll know that what comes from her pen is bound to be good. If you've haven't read "Crash," do so now (sorry I can't provide a link, ff.net doesn't allow) and then give her encouragement to keep on with her work.
*************
"That's it! Vampires, demons, hellhounds and flesh-eating zombies I can take. That's my job. But this weird time-shifty stuff that's been screwing with my head all week is just too much. I can't deal. And now it's all with the dancing and singing and everyone's making atrocious rhymes!" Buffy entered the Magic Box for the first time since the day that wouldn't end and found the others already assembled and mulling over the latest "virus" to infect Sunnydale.
"I know. I couldn't get my Breakfast Burrito this morning until I'd listened to the complete Ode to the Doublemeat Medley performed by Stan at the drive up window," Xander commiserated. "That was a wacky start to my day."
"Hey, don't knock the Doublemeat. Looks like fast food is in my near career future. I start next week," Buffy said.
"Do you get an employee discount?" Anya enquired. "You and Dawn can eat really cheaply if you work it right."
"Buffy are you sure you want to work for a corporation that is based on the slaughter of innocent animals?" Tara asked gently.
"I'm not saying I'm going to love it," Buffy replied. "But it will get some cash flow into the house while I look for something better." She shrugged. "Anyway, back to the ongoing musical ... what do you suppose that's all about?"
"I've got a theory," Giles began and the others tunefully joined in with their own hypotheses.
*********
Willow held back on the group sing, mortified that anyone might hear her off-key croaking and afraid that the truth about her forgetting spell might come out and undo all the progress she'd made with Tara. She wished again that she had never told Buffy about Miss Kitty's resurrection. If necessary she would perform the memory spell on her friend too, but for now Buffy was so wrapped up in her own life she appeared to have forgotten what Willow had told her. Typical! A spell the magnitude of a resurrection was something to be praised for and all Willow had received was Tara's stunned dismay and Buffy's casual disregard. Thank goddess, Giles hadn't found out. She would have received a tongue-lashing from him for sure.
What was so wrong with her getting better, stronger and more knowledgeable in her chosen field? No one faulted Buffy when she colored outside the lines, refused to follow the Council's orders and used her intuition to solve a problem. But Willow, oh no, she was strictly research girl as far as the Scoobies were concerned. They couldn't see her vast potential. They never even looked for it.
The Research Song was over and Willow tuned back in, hitting the books hard until Tara nudged her leg under the table and suggested going home for a particular volume that didn't exist. Willow enthusiastically agreed and soon the lovers were out in the beautiful, sunshiny day, prancing through the park and falling into their bed together. Tara had such a gorgeous voice, it made Willow's heart race to hear the love trembling in every word of her song.
As she sank between her lover's thighs with a contented sigh, Willow was convinced more than ever that she'd been right to smooth over the little spat between them with magic. Anything that could bring this joy, this bliss, could only be of the good, right?
************
Xander watched Anya go through her nightly beauty regimen; hair receiving exactly 120 strokes with a soft bristle brush, lotion liberally applied to all elbows, knees and heels, and tonight some weird blue herb poultice Tara had given her to reduce fine lines and wrinkles was lathered across her face. Hm. That meant no nookie. Anya wasn't in the mood when she wasn't looking her best.
Xander sighed and shifted back in bed, hands clasped behind his head. This was it. Much as admitting it felt like battery acid in the eye, Spike was right. This was what life was all about: end of a hard day's work and your beautiful honey getting ready to cuddle beside you to sleep, to hold you and be your friend and companion forever and ever.
As he felt Anya's weight settle on the mattress next to him, Xander licked his lips and cleared his throat. "Wait! Don't turn out the light yet. An, I have something I want to say."
Only he didn't say it so much as sing it with growing dismay as each verse poured unbidden from his mouth.
Xander's Doubts "Anya, I have something big to tell ya. I'd really like for you to be my bride. But Anya, there are issues I must spell ya. Things that I keep deeply locked inside.... Like... Did you know I killed my best pal Jesse? Even though he wasn't human at the time It tore me up and shaped my hate of demons. It's really hard to tell you this in rhyme,
But sometimes when we're lying close together And I think, "This is my girl so soft and warm," Remembering the creature that you once were I fear that you'll take back your demon form.
Then there are my issues with my father A man I never want to emulate But I'm told sons often turn out like their fathers And don't know if I can e'er escape my fate.
I also have some problems with self-image Years of getting crapped on helped shape that. And pals like powerful witches and a Slayer Make me feel dumb, clumsy, useless and quite fat.
I hope you understand my hesitation To pledge my troth and walk you down the aisle, Spike said I should just do it and be grateful So I choke my fears and hide behind a smile.
But Anya, I still loooove ya, And will marry you, if you want it too," he warbled.
"This is a proposal?!" Anya cried, jumping up from the bed. "Thanks for nothing, Harris!" She slammed the bathroom door behind her as she left.
Xander was humiliated. He'd truly meant to propose to her. It was horrible to have his deepest anxieties and dreads reduced to a few catchy phrases that couldn't begin to sum up the complexity of his emotions. The snatches of songs he'd heard all over town today suddenly seemed heartbreaking instead of amusing. No one deserved to have their feelings so belittled and dismissed.
He was just damn grateful the song hadn't included a verse about the fact that his deepest buried fantasy included himself, Anya and Spike in a threesome.
**********
The next evening Dawn assured an obviously upset Tara that she would be fine alone, and then watched her friend, clutching some type of dried weed, scurry distractedly out the front door.
Silence settled on the house, magnifying the drip of a faucet and the creak of wood expanding and contracting in the newly repaired stairwell.
Dawn was getting used to the quiet since she spent so much time alone now that Glory was no longer a threat. It would be great when Willow and Tara moved in at the end of term. Half their stuff was already in mom's old room. Dawn would love having them here, especially at night when Buffy went patrolling. Of course, Dawn had told her sister she was way too old for a babysitter, which she was, but it still got kind of lonely and creepy night after night.
Dawn wandered up to her room and, closing the door carefully behind her, got out her Secret Box. It held a jumble of jewelry, old Barbie shoes, a rabbit's foot, special stones, one of Buffy's old lipsticks, shells and sea- glass she'd picked up at the beach, and just lately it held a number of trinkets with price tags still attached which she'd shoplifted from stores all over town.
Suddenly the young girl felt a swelling in her throat. It was that choked up feeling you get just before you bawl your eyes out, but instead of crying she found herself bursting into song...
Dawn' Lament I'm an orphan. No one feels my pain. My sister's the Slayer. Try living up to that! I used to be a Key. At least then I was special. Now I'm nothing and we're really poor besides. If I sometimes take things, can you be surprised? Janice has so much crap, and I have squat. I don't even get a good song. I hate unstructured verse.
Woe is me. I'm a misunderstood teen. Woe is me. I wish I had a boyfriend. Woe is me. I think Spike's really hot. Woe is me. He only has eyes for Buffy. My life sucks!
Luckily her song was cut short as two Howdy-Doody-style minions burst into the room and gagged the teen, then dragged her away.
**********
Buffy walked toward the Magic Box, hands jammed in her pockets, head down, thinking about what had just happened in Spike's crypt.
Earlier in the week she had told the vampire she was sick of constantly tripping over him and couldn't he please find someone else to stalk. But when he followed her command and actually stayed out of her way the past few days, she found she missed his company.
So tonight she had gone, ostensibly to see if he knew anything about the rampant musicality around town, but actually to check up on him. After inviting her in and settling her with a cup of herbal tea in his ratty old armchair, he had listened to her complain about the time shifting and job disasters she had suffered. He agreed with Giles that it sounded like someone was testing her abilities and said he'd keep an eye out for that black van.
Then unexpectedly, he opened his mouth and began to sing in his sexy, smoky baritone and she listened in amazement while her insides melted into a puddle of goo.
It was a beautiful, simple ballad in which he told her, "I'll always be there for you." And he sang it so soulfully that it didn't seem like an "I'll be watching you," kind of stalkery badness but a promise of fidelity that made her ache all over. Damn! Why did this curse or whatever it was have to involve singing? She was such a sucker for a serenade.
The idea of relying on Spike was very seductive, as overwhelmed as she felt these days. She had to guard against it. Letting him into her life would be bad. Very bad. And wrong. Very wrong. Out from under the spell of his voice it was easier to remember that.
She looked up and found herself already in front of the Magic Box with no memory of walking there. She squared her shoulders, shook off her ruminations about Spike and entered the shop.
Willow, who had also just arrived, greeted her with a smile and started chatting on about the hilarious altercation at a fender-bender she'd witnessed that afternoon. As the people involved in the accident had argued in three quarter time, a host of mimes had waltzed in the background.
"You wanna talk surreal ... I've had nightmares that made more sense!"
Tara came down the stairs from the upper level.
"Baby! I didn't know you were here," Willow exclaimed. "I thought you were spending time with Dawn tonight?"
"I - I was." Tara appeared flustered. "I needed to check something out in one of the books here." She lifted her chin and gave Willow an almost defiant stare.
Buffy looked back and forth between Willow and Tara in consternation. Something was happening. She had rarely seen Tara so upset, almost angry. Anger and Tara were not two things you expected to mix 'n' match.
The fact that Willow didn't ask 'what's the matter' let Buffy know that her friend knew perfectly well why Tara was furious and didn't want to open the subject. It must have to do with that Kitty Fantastico fiasco Buffy decided.
The tense silence held a moment longer and was broken when Giles wandered in from the back room at the same moment that Tara, as if making a decision, asked, "Willow. What is this?" and held out a crushed sprig of dried flowers.
"That?" Willow's voice squeaked and she cleared her throat. "It's just ... I found it and thought it was pretty so I, um, put it under your pillow to, uh, give you s-sweet dreams." Her smile wavered.
"It's not a charm?" Tara demanded, searching Willow's eyes with her own. "It's not part of a spell?"
"N-not that I'm aware," Willow's voice trailed off. Her eyes grew wide and she clutched at her throat. She managed to croak out an 'oh no' before she began to sing...
"I Can Make Things Better" "Tara, I can't lie to you, you always see my heart. I want to keep you happy, never drive us apart. I gave you back the pet you loved. Made her alive and strong. But you didn't want the gift I gave. You told me it was wrong.
Why baby, why is it wrong to show I care? It can't be wrong, when I brought some comfort there. Why baby, why is it so hard to see That I am the magic and the magic is me.
I did a little spell last week, so you'd forget our fight And it worked out so good for us, I'm sure that it was right. Haven't we been happy? Hasn't it been swell? With just a tiny shift of mind I made heaven out of hell.
Why baby, why is it wrong to show I care? It can't be wrong, when I brought some comfort there. Why baby, why is it so hard to see That I am the magic and the magic is me.
A shocked silence followed Willow's revelation. Tara was weeping. Buffy was open-mouthed. And Giles looked ready to burst into an apoplectic rage.
"I am aghast, simply aghast, at your cavalier misuse of magic and ... and manipulation of someone's mind. How could you possibly think your actions were correct, Willow? Had you even taken into account the possible long- range effects of performing a resurrection spell? Had you considered the ramifications of...."
The doorbell jangled as Xander, trailed by a listless Anya, breezed in. "What'd we miss?"
The others looked up.
"Holy Mama, what happened?" Xander asked, eyeing their expressions. "Who's been singing?"
**********
A half hour and a Bill of Rights length Giles' rant later, the door opened again. A goofy looking creature with the plasticine head of a marionette was pushed into the room, followed by Spike.
"My master has the Slayer's sister hostage at the Bronze because she summoned him and at midnight he's going to take her to the Underworld to be his queen."
"What does he want?"
The minion pointed at Buffy. "Her." He abruptly pushed Spike to the side and hightailed it out the door, very quickly for such a top heavy being.
"Dawn's in trouble, must be Tuesday," Buffy muttered. "All right, everyone. I'll go in first. See what this Andrew Lloyd Webber Wannabe is all about. The rest of you can back me up, take care of any of his puppet pals that give me trouble."
There was a murmur of agreement. The accusations, questions and reprimands were put aside as everyone grabbed a weapon from the chest in the training room and followed Buffy to the grand finale.
*********
"...I feed off your need and I feast on your greed. This plethora of rancor is the food that I need. If the truth sets you free, then that's where I wanna be As anger, rage and discontent spill their precious seed. My hunger is filled and my spirit is freed."
As he sang, Sweet tapped danced across the stage where Dawn was ensconced in a high backed, throne-like chair.
"Sorry I asked!" Buffy interrupted impatiently after the third verse. "You live off the trouble you stir up. I get it. Pleeease no more choruses."
"What about you, little miss?" Sweet struck a pose, steepling his fingers and cocking his head curiously toward Buffy. "What's your ditty, kitty? Haven't heard much about what makes a Slayer tick"
"Oh no," Buffy shook her head and backed unconsciously away. "Not going there. There's no way I'm going to start telling all my personal busi...."
Before she knew it, Buffy was facing her friends and belting out her big number.
Buffy's Burden "There's something I've been hiding. I was afraid to tell. But keeping it a secret. Has been a taste of hell. I know you're all my friends and you want the best for me That's why I fear to disappoint and let the truth fly free:
But...
I'm pregnant. Though I know it doesn't show. You'll see I'm pregnant, when my belly swells and grows. And yes it's Riley's. Did you think I was a whore? Don't think I'm careless. Sometimes Trojans lose the war.
Interlude: I'm keeping it even though it's wrong. I can barely take care of myself and Dawn. But this life inside is so precious and sweet To one who brings death to every creature she meets.
So... I'm pregnant. You'll be uncle, grandpa, aunts, I'm really pregnant. Already stretching out my pants. Having a baby, isn't in the Slayer game, But I will love it. And I hope you'll do the same."
When her song was finished, Buffy heaved a huge sigh of relief, grateful that it was over without the revelation of her erotic dreams about Spike.
Everyone but Spike looked shell-shocked, gazing at her wide-eyed. He was watching her with a little half-smile on his lips and nodded approvingly when their eyes met. His earlier advice had been right, of course, Buffy felt lighter and better than she had in the past few weeks now that her secret was unburdened.
The nattily dressed demon began to applaud. "Lovely. Mm-mm. Even you humans must be able to taste the delicious emotions stewing in this room." He smacked his lips with pleasure.
Sweet stood and extended a hand to Dawn, who cowered in her chair. "I think my work here is at an end. Come, my queen."
Buffy started forward, fists raising threateningly. "You're leaving all right, but you're not taking Dawn."
"She summoned me. Gave me a chance to play in your world for a little while. Now I'm giving her the opportunity to play in mine. Besides, she's a pretty young thing." The demon stroked Dawn's long, silky hair and she cringed away.
"I didn't!" she swore. "I never ... Buffy, I don't know what he's talking about."
"My talisman, dolly. Round thing about yea big made of silver with lots of fancy writing on it...."
"Oh. OH!" Xander stepped forward, one hand upraised. "In a little blue pouch. Yeah. I found that when I was unpacking a box at the shop. Oh my god, I did this!"
"What on earth are you...." Giles began.
"I was..." Xander blushed, "thinking about the future. Wondering what I should do. I guess I made a wish while I was holding it. But I didn't mean to or anything," he rushed to add. "And I certainly didn't know there'd be singing and dancing involved."
"What did you wish?" Willow asked. "To be punched in the schnoz? Cause that's likely to happen real soon."
"For the truth," Tara said quietly. "He just wished to know truth, Willow." She gave her lover a hard look.
The demon chuckled at their discord then with a sweeping look up and down Xander's body he said, "Sorry baby, not my type," and turned back to Dawn. "As for you, sweetpea," he sighed with regret as he gave her head a final pat, "we would've made such a lovely couple. Ah well."
"What a lotta fun, you guys have been real swell And there's not a one who can say this ended well All those secrets you've been concealing Say you're happy now, once more with feeling, Now I gotta run, see you all in hell."
As his song ended, he disappeared in a swirl of blue smoke. The group watched as it drifted up to the ceiling and dispersed.
"Wow," Dawn commented. "That was ... something." She turned to her sister. "Buffy...."
"Don't even start." Buffy held up a warding hand. "I'm not ready to discuss this. Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow. There's been enough sharing for one day."
Anya piped up to anyone who would listen, "You know why this spell didn't affect me, don't you? I mean, yeah I sang and all, but I didn't reveal any embarrassing secrets and do you know why?"
No one asked so she continued on. "Because I don't keep secrets. What you see is what you get. I'm honest and direct and not ashamed of my past like some people." She looked pointedly at Xander. "This should be an object lesson to all of you." She slung her purse over her shoulder and marched toward the door.
Xander looked sheepishly around at them. "I'm really sorry I caused this. Dawn, sorry you got kidnapped ... again."
She shrugged. "Getting used to it. He was less creepy than Harmony, anyway."
With a last apologetic smile and a "You gonna be okay, Buff?" Xander followed Anya's exit from the building.
Red-eyed, Tara gave Buffy's hand a squeeze. "Whenever you're ready," she murmured, "We can talk." Then she too left without looking back at Willow.
"Tara! Wait. I'm sorry," Willow rushed after her.
"Buffy is there anything I can do...." Giles began, walking toward his charge.
She folded her arms over her chest and shook her head. "No. Really Giles, I'm just not ready to discuss it yet. You could see Dawn home for me, though. I want to take care of these dead minions before the Bronze staff comes in tomorrow and gets an eyeful."
"All right then," Giles acquiesced, inclining his head. "Dawn?"
Dawn flounced after him with an angry glare at Buffy as she passed. "You could've told me, you know. I'm your sister for cripes sake. You're supposed to share stuff with me!" She tossed her hair back and walked stiff-legged after Giles.
The Bronze was empty except for Buffy and Spike.
Wandering onto the stage, Buffy sighed and sank down on the throne Dawn had vacated. "Well, that was strange ... and somehow unfinished. I felt like there should have been a big group number at the end there. Weird."
Spike perched on the edge of the stage at her feet. "Know what you mean, love. I thought there might be a final kiss or something of that sort."
"Like 'Moulin Rouge' without the dying," Buffy agreed. "Xander and Anya missed their cue, I guess. And Willow and Tara ... who knows how that will end. I mean where do they go from here?"
"Hm." Spike stood, jumped up on the stage and prowled around for a bit, toying with a mic stand and kicking aside some sheet music that had fluttered to the floor. "'Course," he began, "happy couples aren't popular in today's musicals. But in my day, the fella always got the girl at the end." He stopped behind Buffy's chair, his hands resting on the back of it.
"You went to the theater, Spike?"
"Often." His hands slipped down from the back of the chair to rest lightly on her shoulders. She didn't shrug them off so he began to gently massage.
"Is that where you learned to be such a romantic? Silly Victorian musicals?" She unconsciously leaned back into his strong hands. "How long have you been a vampire now? You should know better. Love never triumphs and the couple always splits."
"Bit cynical for such a young thing aren't you?" he asked, leaning down over the back of the chair so his mouth was near her ear. "Doesn't have to be that way."
She looked over her shoulder at him and found his face was far too close. For a moment she was transfixed by his lips then she sat up stiffly, forcing his hands to drop away from her shoulders. "Doesn't it?" She stood abruptly. "Come on, Spike. Let's take care of business." She leaped off the stage, headed for one of the discarded bodies and seized it under the arms.
He sighed and trudged after her, picking up the heels of the minion. "Rising music and a big romantic kiss would've been more interesting," he muttered as they dragged the super-sized Howdy-Doody out the door.
To be continued....