Ok, I have mislaid my assassin's guild diary for the moment, but in case
anyone wonders what Downey did wrong, there is a rule in there that states
that no student is to visit a house of "ill-repute" until he is in the
sixth form. Well, that's vaguely it anyway.
Chapter 2
Another bright and beautiful day dawned in Ankh-Morpork.well, bright anyway.
Grunwoth Nivor muttered in his sleep, rolled over and fell out of bed with a resounding thud that woke up several assassins including Havelock Vetinari who, irritated that he couldn't get back to sleep, lay awake staring at the ceiling. It was a few minutes before he clocked Slias' empty bed. Noting the time, he padded over to the window.
The smell of cigarette smoke drifted down and he smiled to himself.
Silas was in the habit of having a furtive cigarette around dawn, in a nook left by a recently departed gargoyle. As Havelock crept along the roof towards him, he grinned and wordlessly offered the cigarette to him. Havelock declined, smoking was bad for your health, it limited your capabilities.
It didn't seem to be doing Silas any harm, it was true, but then a charging elephant on illegal substances would have problems denting Silas.
They sat watching the dawn for a while, the rooftop offered an expansive view of the city, with the rising sun streaking the chimneys orange, it actually looked beautiful.
Silas carefully stubbed out the cigarette, brushing the ash over the edge of the building, and hid the dog end in his sock.
He turned to his friend and grinned wickedly "Are you going to enlighten him?" he said, an evil little grin on his face.
Havelock smiled "No, let him stew over it for a bit, he must have realized his blunder by now."
Silas nodded "I heard Ludorum complaining last night that he couldn't get any sleep because Downey was rattling around looking for something."
They looked at each other, both smiling evilly.
Silas broke the silence; " Do you think we're being a bit cruel though? I mean, he's an arse, it's true, but the humiliation will be.well, humiliating."
Havelock seemed to think about this for a while, then he turned back to his friend.
"Nah."
As they crept back into the dormitory, there was a thud that seemed to shake the roof, and a lot of muffled cursing.
Havelock sighed "We're going to have to put some kind of barrier around his bed soon."
Silas giggled "A whole pile of Downey's waiting to be squashed by the mighty Nivor!"
"Great Nivor, hear our prayer."
"Grunwoth the Destroyer!"
"Shhhh!"
As they got back into their respective beds, Havelock heard Silas having to muffle his laughter with his pillow.
* * *
Warning! This scene contains football! If the thought of lithe young assassins running around in the mud is liable to cause you excitement, those with overactive imaginations are advised to have a lie down or think about something else.
The rain fell in a relentless hammering, as if it was trying to smash the Disc.
The ball shot into the net.
"YEESSSS!" Silas sprinted over the pitch with his shirt over his head, narrowly missing the goal posts.
Half of Viper house screamed in triumph, the other half seethed and Downeys lips narrowed into an ugly line.
Silas was almost flying over the pitch, mud splattered his face and whilst he was temporarily blinded, Downey seized an opportunity and kicked him hard on the shin.
Silas fell back into the mud, cursing, and Downey, smirking, passed the ball to Johan, who scored the next goal, to the laughter and applause of his team.
Grunworth, who had hauled Silas out of the mud, flung himself at Downey and they both went flying, Downey looking very surprised, then angry, crawled out from under Nivor, cursing.
Most of the young assassins were too busy still playing to notice the small fight breaking out, but a few were beginning to sidle over in the hope of amusing developments.
They were not disappointed, Downey was knocked off his feet again by both Silas and Havelock, who had both hurled themselves at him at the same time.
Then ill feeling broke out and they commenced to fight.
It was almost impossible to tell friend from foe, everyone was covered in mud. "Everyone" consisted of those who were game for a laugh, those who were spoiling for a fight, and those who had just been in the way when the tide of assassins swept into the melee.
They struggled in the mud until Downey and Vetinari were separated with the help of four other students, and Silas gamely tried to prise Grunworth off Johan Ludorum, who was having mud shoved down his shorts.
Eventually they divided into their original teams and glared at each other through the sheet of rain.
Downey screamed revenge. "You little shits!" he shouted, unheeding of the games tutor (who had been having a quiet smoke) hurrying towards them. "You wait! We'll beat the shit out of you!"
A few assassins behind him growled assent, while most of them muttered "We?" under their breath.
Havelock, wiping the blood from his nose shouted back: "Why not get serena to do it for you!" his blue eyes flashed.
The colour drained out of Downey's face, leaving his eyes glittering through the rain like those of a starving animal.
"Or Fifi!" Silas chimed in "You're not in the sixth form yet Elliot!"
Silence fell. The assassins that were a bit quicker off the mark started to snigger. Downey growled like an enraged bear and threw himself at Havelock again, calling him things many of the younger assassins resolved to look up once this was over.
In no time the pitch was once again a mass of black clad, muddy students shouting, swearing and generally causing a ruckus.
The games master sighed and put out his cigarette, it was going to take more than a sharp blow on the whistle to sort this lot out.
The clock ticked the seconds away maddeningly slowly, it was the only sound in the corridor outside Flannelfoot's office. The grey sky outside did nothing to alleviate the feeling of impending doom that settled heavily on the three muddy students who sat outside, every one of them wanting to smash that clock that dragged the heels of Time. (Anyone who has sat or stood outside the head-teacher's office waiting for a major telling off will know exactly what I mean)
Downey crept out of the doors and glared at the three sitting in silence.
"You're in for it now." He hissed. "He doesn't look happy."
"So, what does he think of your extracurricular activities?" Said Havelock innocently while Grunworth sniggered into his hands.
Downey looked as if he was about to start another fight, his eyes narrowing and his hands clenching into fists.
There was a polite cough from the doorway, the four of them turned to see Zlorf Flannelfoot standing in the doorway.
"Off with you Downey." He snapped.
With a last defiant glare, Downey loped off down the corridor, he didn't look back.
Zlorf turned his attention back to the miserable looking students. "You three had better come in." he said, and he turned on his heel and walked back into his office.
The three of them looked at each other nervously, Downey had been right. Their headmaster most certainly did not look happy.
To be continued.dun dun duuuun..
Chapter 2
Another bright and beautiful day dawned in Ankh-Morpork.well, bright anyway.
Grunwoth Nivor muttered in his sleep, rolled over and fell out of bed with a resounding thud that woke up several assassins including Havelock Vetinari who, irritated that he couldn't get back to sleep, lay awake staring at the ceiling. It was a few minutes before he clocked Slias' empty bed. Noting the time, he padded over to the window.
The smell of cigarette smoke drifted down and he smiled to himself.
Silas was in the habit of having a furtive cigarette around dawn, in a nook left by a recently departed gargoyle. As Havelock crept along the roof towards him, he grinned and wordlessly offered the cigarette to him. Havelock declined, smoking was bad for your health, it limited your capabilities.
It didn't seem to be doing Silas any harm, it was true, but then a charging elephant on illegal substances would have problems denting Silas.
They sat watching the dawn for a while, the rooftop offered an expansive view of the city, with the rising sun streaking the chimneys orange, it actually looked beautiful.
Silas carefully stubbed out the cigarette, brushing the ash over the edge of the building, and hid the dog end in his sock.
He turned to his friend and grinned wickedly "Are you going to enlighten him?" he said, an evil little grin on his face.
Havelock smiled "No, let him stew over it for a bit, he must have realized his blunder by now."
Silas nodded "I heard Ludorum complaining last night that he couldn't get any sleep because Downey was rattling around looking for something."
They looked at each other, both smiling evilly.
Silas broke the silence; " Do you think we're being a bit cruel though? I mean, he's an arse, it's true, but the humiliation will be.well, humiliating."
Havelock seemed to think about this for a while, then he turned back to his friend.
"Nah."
As they crept back into the dormitory, there was a thud that seemed to shake the roof, and a lot of muffled cursing.
Havelock sighed "We're going to have to put some kind of barrier around his bed soon."
Silas giggled "A whole pile of Downey's waiting to be squashed by the mighty Nivor!"
"Great Nivor, hear our prayer."
"Grunwoth the Destroyer!"
"Shhhh!"
As they got back into their respective beds, Havelock heard Silas having to muffle his laughter with his pillow.
* * *
Warning! This scene contains football! If the thought of lithe young assassins running around in the mud is liable to cause you excitement, those with overactive imaginations are advised to have a lie down or think about something else.
The rain fell in a relentless hammering, as if it was trying to smash the Disc.
The ball shot into the net.
"YEESSSS!" Silas sprinted over the pitch with his shirt over his head, narrowly missing the goal posts.
Half of Viper house screamed in triumph, the other half seethed and Downeys lips narrowed into an ugly line.
Silas was almost flying over the pitch, mud splattered his face and whilst he was temporarily blinded, Downey seized an opportunity and kicked him hard on the shin.
Silas fell back into the mud, cursing, and Downey, smirking, passed the ball to Johan, who scored the next goal, to the laughter and applause of his team.
Grunworth, who had hauled Silas out of the mud, flung himself at Downey and they both went flying, Downey looking very surprised, then angry, crawled out from under Nivor, cursing.
Most of the young assassins were too busy still playing to notice the small fight breaking out, but a few were beginning to sidle over in the hope of amusing developments.
They were not disappointed, Downey was knocked off his feet again by both Silas and Havelock, who had both hurled themselves at him at the same time.
Then ill feeling broke out and they commenced to fight.
It was almost impossible to tell friend from foe, everyone was covered in mud. "Everyone" consisted of those who were game for a laugh, those who were spoiling for a fight, and those who had just been in the way when the tide of assassins swept into the melee.
They struggled in the mud until Downey and Vetinari were separated with the help of four other students, and Silas gamely tried to prise Grunworth off Johan Ludorum, who was having mud shoved down his shorts.
Eventually they divided into their original teams and glared at each other through the sheet of rain.
Downey screamed revenge. "You little shits!" he shouted, unheeding of the games tutor (who had been having a quiet smoke) hurrying towards them. "You wait! We'll beat the shit out of you!"
A few assassins behind him growled assent, while most of them muttered "We?" under their breath.
Havelock, wiping the blood from his nose shouted back: "Why not get serena to do it for you!" his blue eyes flashed.
The colour drained out of Downey's face, leaving his eyes glittering through the rain like those of a starving animal.
"Or Fifi!" Silas chimed in "You're not in the sixth form yet Elliot!"
Silence fell. The assassins that were a bit quicker off the mark started to snigger. Downey growled like an enraged bear and threw himself at Havelock again, calling him things many of the younger assassins resolved to look up once this was over.
In no time the pitch was once again a mass of black clad, muddy students shouting, swearing and generally causing a ruckus.
The games master sighed and put out his cigarette, it was going to take more than a sharp blow on the whistle to sort this lot out.
The clock ticked the seconds away maddeningly slowly, it was the only sound in the corridor outside Flannelfoot's office. The grey sky outside did nothing to alleviate the feeling of impending doom that settled heavily on the three muddy students who sat outside, every one of them wanting to smash that clock that dragged the heels of Time. (Anyone who has sat or stood outside the head-teacher's office waiting for a major telling off will know exactly what I mean)
Downey crept out of the doors and glared at the three sitting in silence.
"You're in for it now." He hissed. "He doesn't look happy."
"So, what does he think of your extracurricular activities?" Said Havelock innocently while Grunworth sniggered into his hands.
Downey looked as if he was about to start another fight, his eyes narrowing and his hands clenching into fists.
There was a polite cough from the doorway, the four of them turned to see Zlorf Flannelfoot standing in the doorway.
"Off with you Downey." He snapped.
With a last defiant glare, Downey loped off down the corridor, he didn't look back.
Zlorf turned his attention back to the miserable looking students. "You three had better come in." he said, and he turned on his heel and walked back into his office.
The three of them looked at each other nervously, Downey had been right. Their headmaster most certainly did not look happy.
To be continued.dun dun duuuun..