Grissom hesitated when he went to speak, but lost the nerve. He
looked down at the floor and sighed. They had entered Sara's apartment in
silence and that was twenty minutes ago. She sat on the couch with a cup of
coffee cradled between her hands, watching him from one minute to the next.
She noticed each time he tried to talk and each time, he failed to do so.
Trying to be as patient as possible, she returned to looking into her
coffee, as though she could somehow find the answers to her problems.
Biting his bottom lip, he sighed. Nodding his head in silent agreement, he moved to sit in front of her. He sat on the coffee table and took the cup from her hands. Sara watched him with confusion as he turned back to her and took her hands in his. He smiled slightly and squeezed them. "I. I'm sorry this is taking so long. I wish I could just come out and say it." He cringed and looked down at their hands.
"You could just say it, you know?" Sara urged him, feeling that they were going to be here all day, although that didn't sound like a bad thing.
He nodded and scooted forward slightly. "I'm not sure how you'll react." He started, glancing up briefly. "It's not easy for me Sara-"
"I know that Griss. I do, but it's scaring me." She interrupted with deep concern lacing her words. Grissom's head snapped up in shock. Sara continued as she pulled one hand free to cup his cheek, the tips of her fingers lightly caressing his skin. "I don't know what's gotten into you lately, or the last year or so, but it's gotten me so worried and every time I've tried to ask you, you've brushed me off." She paused and closed her eyes, only to look at her hand when she opened them.
Grissom closed his eyes in silent surrender. Her light touch was what he'd only dreamed about and now she was touching him, but it only deepened his fears of her rejection. He covered her hand and pressed it to his face. His eyes locked with hers as he took a deep breath and prepared himself to just out with it. "I." His mouth twitched with the intense emotions that were held within him. "I had surgery. a few months back." He finally breathed out. His eyes watched as hers widened with concern.
"Why? What was wrong? Are you ok now?" She questioned in quick succession. She shifted forward until her knees were positioned either side of his. She released his hand and placed it on his knee. He still held her other hand against his cheek as he stared at her with fear in his eyes.
"I'm fine. now. I. erm. I had Otosclerosis.But, the surgery fixed it." He cleared his throat and pulled her hand away, in case she was going to retreat from him. His eyes dropped from hers. "I suffered hearing problems for the most part of last year, but. I."
Sara nodded and looked down at her hand that was rubbing against his knee lightly. "You're ok now, right?" She asked quietly.
He breathed in deeply and held her hand tightly. "Yes."
She started biting her lower lip in thought before finding his eyes and asking. "Is that why you were avoiding me?" Grissom nodded slowly. She sighed and shook her head. "Why?"
Grissom stared at her with confusion. Looking over her shoulder as he thought about this, he narrowed his eyes. Why? Thinking about her question, he couldn't seem to think of anything. There must have been reasons at some point, but they all seemed moot. Focusing back on her face, he breathed lightly out his nose and said the only thing he could think of. "I'm a private man."
Sara started biting the inside of her lip to suppress the smile, but failed. She dropped her head and laughed quietly. "Griss?"
He didn't know what was going on, but he answered. "Yeah?"
"You put me through hell and the only reason you have, is that you are a private person?" Although it sounded slightly funny in her head, it suddenly struck her that he didn't trust her. personally.
She met his eyes and he knew instantly what she was thinking. "Don't think that Sara."
"Think what? You don't trust me." She found her voice hardened as she spoke.
Grissom shook his head and squeezed her hands. "That's not true. I do trust you." He was breathing heavily now. He couldn't think of anything else that he needed to tell her. She gave an unexpected reaction to his biggest secret, but. He stopped at that thought and looked at her with clear blue eyes.
Sara saw this and it seemed like something just hit, like a light bulb going on in his head. "What?" She asked quietly.
He didn't take his eyes from hers as he moved to sit beside her on the couch. Sara followed him with her body and continued to watch his eyes, as several emotions seemed to show.
"I love you." He whispered, shocked at his own admission.
Sara's mouth opened in surprise. "Huh?" She didn't completely register what he just said, but it sounded something like-
"I. I love you." He repeated. Grissom's eyes closed and wondered why he didn't realise sooner. He looked at her and noticed that she seemed frozen. Taking a shaky breath, he leaned forward and brushed his lips lightly over hers. He pulled back and watched as her eyes opened. She was still in shock and before she could say of do anything, he very hesitantly pulled her closer. Sara's hand reached up as she moved towards him and watched her fingers lightly brush against his cheek before laying her whole palm against his face. She could feel him trembling against her lips as he kissed her again.
Grissom broke the kiss and pulled her into his arms. He pressed his cheek against hers before turning his head slightly to softly kiss her cheek. "I love you Sara." He told her again.
"I love you too Griss." She whispered, pulling him tighter to her. She didn't realise what he said when he first said it. She thought it was something to avoid the subject, but she realised what he said when she looked into his eyes and noticed he wasn't changing the subject, but rather, giving her another reason, a reason that surpassed the first. "How can you be afraid of me?" She asked.
He gently ran his hands up her back, then down again. "I'm afraid of a lot of things and you're just one of the bigger ones." He paused and pressed a kiss into her neck. "I can't change who I am Sara." He breathed into her ear. Pulling his head back to look into her eyes, he reached up and ran his fingers down her face. "I can only do this if we agree on leaving our personal lives at home." He knew she understood now, but he didn't know why she was still interested in pursuing a relationship with him.
Sara stared back with her dark brown eyes. She covered his hand on her cheek and turned to place a single kiss on his palm. "I've been trying to tell you that for years." She watched him smile and close his eyes as she pushed her fingers through his hair. "I know you don't like mixing personal and work life together. I've known you too long to not know that. I love my work too, just like you." She smiled widely as he pulled her closer and watched his eyes travel over her face.
"We need to talk more." He breathed in slowly before tipping his head forward to kiss her lightly. Sara agreed with a soft hum as he slowly reclined them on the couch, lost in the moment. After tangled explorations, a trail of clothes was left in the path of the bedroom. It seemed too early, but after an emotionally filled confession, it seemed like the only next step. They were planning on making this work and both couldn't think what to say next.
Actions speak louder than words after all.
Stepping out of the bathroom, Grissom walked down the hall and into the bedroom. "What are we going to do for the next few hours?" He asked as he buttoned his shirt. Sara thought for a few minutes while she stood in a large towel wrapped around her damp body. "Dinner?" He suggested and smiled as he watched her. He left his shirt half undone and walked around the bed to wrap his arms around her from behind.
She turned in his arms and met him in a gentle kiss. "We still need to talk." She murmured.
He moaned miserably and pulled back slightly. She smiled and began buttoning up the rest of his shirt. "Do you want to go out for dinner?" He asked as he watched her.
She shrugged as she reached the last button. Smoothing her hands over his shirt, she sighed. "We do need to talk and I know you'd rather talk in private." She looked up into his eyes. They still had so much to discuss.
"You're right." He nodded and leaned down to kiss her once more. "I'll cook." He murmured, but didn't let go.
She buried her face in his neck as his arms snaked around her. The towel covering her body was beginning to fall, but he held it in place. "It's 8.30." He told her distractedly as they both turned to look at the clock on the nightstand.
"You realise we've been in bed all day?" She asked, perplexed.
He shrugged and pulled her closer. "Just think about what it's going to be like to not touch or kiss for hours."
She smiled at him. "I better get dressed and you sort dinner out."
"I'd rather take you back to bed than eat." He whispered seductively into her ear, sending anticipating chills down her spine.
TBC
[I think one last chapter should do it and maybe, just maybe, an epilogue, but we'll see. Hope you like it and that Sara didn't give in too easily.]
Biting his bottom lip, he sighed. Nodding his head in silent agreement, he moved to sit in front of her. He sat on the coffee table and took the cup from her hands. Sara watched him with confusion as he turned back to her and took her hands in his. He smiled slightly and squeezed them. "I. I'm sorry this is taking so long. I wish I could just come out and say it." He cringed and looked down at their hands.
"You could just say it, you know?" Sara urged him, feeling that they were going to be here all day, although that didn't sound like a bad thing.
He nodded and scooted forward slightly. "I'm not sure how you'll react." He started, glancing up briefly. "It's not easy for me Sara-"
"I know that Griss. I do, but it's scaring me." She interrupted with deep concern lacing her words. Grissom's head snapped up in shock. Sara continued as she pulled one hand free to cup his cheek, the tips of her fingers lightly caressing his skin. "I don't know what's gotten into you lately, or the last year or so, but it's gotten me so worried and every time I've tried to ask you, you've brushed me off." She paused and closed her eyes, only to look at her hand when she opened them.
Grissom closed his eyes in silent surrender. Her light touch was what he'd only dreamed about and now she was touching him, but it only deepened his fears of her rejection. He covered her hand and pressed it to his face. His eyes locked with hers as he took a deep breath and prepared himself to just out with it. "I." His mouth twitched with the intense emotions that were held within him. "I had surgery. a few months back." He finally breathed out. His eyes watched as hers widened with concern.
"Why? What was wrong? Are you ok now?" She questioned in quick succession. She shifted forward until her knees were positioned either side of his. She released his hand and placed it on his knee. He still held her other hand against his cheek as he stared at her with fear in his eyes.
"I'm fine. now. I. erm. I had Otosclerosis.But, the surgery fixed it." He cleared his throat and pulled her hand away, in case she was going to retreat from him. His eyes dropped from hers. "I suffered hearing problems for the most part of last year, but. I."
Sara nodded and looked down at her hand that was rubbing against his knee lightly. "You're ok now, right?" She asked quietly.
He breathed in deeply and held her hand tightly. "Yes."
She started biting her lower lip in thought before finding his eyes and asking. "Is that why you were avoiding me?" Grissom nodded slowly. She sighed and shook her head. "Why?"
Grissom stared at her with confusion. Looking over her shoulder as he thought about this, he narrowed his eyes. Why? Thinking about her question, he couldn't seem to think of anything. There must have been reasons at some point, but they all seemed moot. Focusing back on her face, he breathed lightly out his nose and said the only thing he could think of. "I'm a private man."
Sara started biting the inside of her lip to suppress the smile, but failed. She dropped her head and laughed quietly. "Griss?"
He didn't know what was going on, but he answered. "Yeah?"
"You put me through hell and the only reason you have, is that you are a private person?" Although it sounded slightly funny in her head, it suddenly struck her that he didn't trust her. personally.
She met his eyes and he knew instantly what she was thinking. "Don't think that Sara."
"Think what? You don't trust me." She found her voice hardened as she spoke.
Grissom shook his head and squeezed her hands. "That's not true. I do trust you." He was breathing heavily now. He couldn't think of anything else that he needed to tell her. She gave an unexpected reaction to his biggest secret, but. He stopped at that thought and looked at her with clear blue eyes.
Sara saw this and it seemed like something just hit, like a light bulb going on in his head. "What?" She asked quietly.
He didn't take his eyes from hers as he moved to sit beside her on the couch. Sara followed him with her body and continued to watch his eyes, as several emotions seemed to show.
"I love you." He whispered, shocked at his own admission.
Sara's mouth opened in surprise. "Huh?" She didn't completely register what he just said, but it sounded something like-
"I. I love you." He repeated. Grissom's eyes closed and wondered why he didn't realise sooner. He looked at her and noticed that she seemed frozen. Taking a shaky breath, he leaned forward and brushed his lips lightly over hers. He pulled back and watched as her eyes opened. She was still in shock and before she could say of do anything, he very hesitantly pulled her closer. Sara's hand reached up as she moved towards him and watched her fingers lightly brush against his cheek before laying her whole palm against his face. She could feel him trembling against her lips as he kissed her again.
Grissom broke the kiss and pulled her into his arms. He pressed his cheek against hers before turning his head slightly to softly kiss her cheek. "I love you Sara." He told her again.
"I love you too Griss." She whispered, pulling him tighter to her. She didn't realise what he said when he first said it. She thought it was something to avoid the subject, but she realised what he said when she looked into his eyes and noticed he wasn't changing the subject, but rather, giving her another reason, a reason that surpassed the first. "How can you be afraid of me?" She asked.
He gently ran his hands up her back, then down again. "I'm afraid of a lot of things and you're just one of the bigger ones." He paused and pressed a kiss into her neck. "I can't change who I am Sara." He breathed into her ear. Pulling his head back to look into her eyes, he reached up and ran his fingers down her face. "I can only do this if we agree on leaving our personal lives at home." He knew she understood now, but he didn't know why she was still interested in pursuing a relationship with him.
Sara stared back with her dark brown eyes. She covered his hand on her cheek and turned to place a single kiss on his palm. "I've been trying to tell you that for years." She watched him smile and close his eyes as she pushed her fingers through his hair. "I know you don't like mixing personal and work life together. I've known you too long to not know that. I love my work too, just like you." She smiled widely as he pulled her closer and watched his eyes travel over her face.
"We need to talk more." He breathed in slowly before tipping his head forward to kiss her lightly. Sara agreed with a soft hum as he slowly reclined them on the couch, lost in the moment. After tangled explorations, a trail of clothes was left in the path of the bedroom. It seemed too early, but after an emotionally filled confession, it seemed like the only next step. They were planning on making this work and both couldn't think what to say next.
Actions speak louder than words after all.
Stepping out of the bathroom, Grissom walked down the hall and into the bedroom. "What are we going to do for the next few hours?" He asked as he buttoned his shirt. Sara thought for a few minutes while she stood in a large towel wrapped around her damp body. "Dinner?" He suggested and smiled as he watched her. He left his shirt half undone and walked around the bed to wrap his arms around her from behind.
She turned in his arms and met him in a gentle kiss. "We still need to talk." She murmured.
He moaned miserably and pulled back slightly. She smiled and began buttoning up the rest of his shirt. "Do you want to go out for dinner?" He asked as he watched her.
She shrugged as she reached the last button. Smoothing her hands over his shirt, she sighed. "We do need to talk and I know you'd rather talk in private." She looked up into his eyes. They still had so much to discuss.
"You're right." He nodded and leaned down to kiss her once more. "I'll cook." He murmured, but didn't let go.
She buried her face in his neck as his arms snaked around her. The towel covering her body was beginning to fall, but he held it in place. "It's 8.30." He told her distractedly as they both turned to look at the clock on the nightstand.
"You realise we've been in bed all day?" She asked, perplexed.
He shrugged and pulled her closer. "Just think about what it's going to be like to not touch or kiss for hours."
She smiled at him. "I better get dressed and you sort dinner out."
"I'd rather take you back to bed than eat." He whispered seductively into her ear, sending anticipating chills down her spine.
TBC
[I think one last chapter should do it and maybe, just maybe, an epilogue, but we'll see. Hope you like it and that Sara didn't give in too easily.]