Remembrance
Author: Liz Camp
Warnings: You shouldn't think that just because A single-minded person without a bone of Originality in their body would be Irritated as the thought of men fucking, it won't appear here.
Disclaimer: Nope...don't own Final Fantasy VIII. I'm gonna go cry now.
Author's Notes:
Well, it took awhile, because I had to figure out the entire plot of this fic before going any farther, and the psychology of the characters. Eh.. lame excuse... I also felt like writing something a bit more lighthearted Nowhere Man...which is headed for heavy plot too...because we're heading into angst-city soon enough with these two. Rest assured... I have a large chunk of the next chapter done too.
----Previous Chapter:
The two Seifer groupies leave the room, and I stand there, silent, until I hear the front door close. This is the first time I've been alone with Seifer since before the Sorceress war began.
Chapter 7----
"So..." I trail off. This is awkward, we're just staring at each other. I don't know what to say, I don't know what he wants me to say. I'm still stunned Seifer didn't try to injure me for going after him like that, even if it was a joke. But was it?
He was too responsive to me for him to have thought that it was a joke...and being aggressive just seemed to turn him on.
Judging by his reaction, anyway.
"-all? Squall?! For the love of Hyne...Squall, you're needed in reality!" I focus on Seifer, blocking out my thoughts. I'll take my cues from him...that way I'll at least know if he....yeah. But, his reaction was positive, even if it was unintentional. Do I want it to be positive?
"SQUALL!" Seifer is standing an inch from my face, screaming at me. I blink slowly.
"Don't have to shout, I can hear you just fine." Seifer looks ready to strangle me with his bare hands. Talk about mood swings...
"Obviously not. I've asked you...TEN TIMES to GET OUT of my bedroom, and wait for me in the LIVING ROOM!"
"All right Seifer, we have a lot to talk about." I nod to him, and leave the room, headed for his sofa.
A half-hour later, and I'm getting bored. How long does it take to put on...whatever he's putting on. Of course, I know he's not just getting dressed. Knowing Seifer, he's trying to sort out exactly what happened, and how he feels about it. He always hated being taken by surprise.
Finally...Seifer appears. Dressed exactly the same as before his shower. I shrug inwardly, he's more unnerved than I thought. Seifer sits on the opposite side of the couch. More silence...this time he's not going to speak first. Damn.
Seifer knows me better than anyone else...and I *think* the reverse is true. He's patient...when he needs to be. So basically, he'll wait me out. I'd better say something.
"I...like your house. You build it yourself?" Lame...very, very lame. Of all the conversation topics...that was the worst. But at least he has to say something now.
"Yeah...well Raaj and Fuu helped of course, but I did most of it. It was something to do, work with my hands...remember some old skills, you know." Seifer coughs self-consciously. I *hate* this...why can't I be comfortable?
"That's...nice. What have you been doing for the past seven years?" Seifer grinned his little mocking grin at me.
"Little of this, little of that. Mostly construction...some security work, home improvements, it varies. You've gone far though...Commander." I snort indignantly.
"It's not as good of a job as you'd think. You know how much I hate paperwork...that's most of what I do all day. All these obligations..." I make a disgusted face, "I'd rather be a normal SeeD...didn't have much of a choice though." Seifer makes a non-committal noise in the back of his throat, I don't think he's actually listening to me. His body language is telling though...he keeps edging closer.
He licks his lips...I don't think he realizes how much he's communicating.
I can see it in his eyes...he's asking me to do something.
"Kiss me." I say, plainly. Seifer watches me, eyes locked on mine. He's thinking...why is he thinking? He wanted this, his eyes told me so.
"Do you really want me to?" Do I...want? It's funny, no one has ever asked me that before. What do *I* want. I rest my forehead on my knees...Seifer is smart enough to know this isn't a rejection, just me thinking. He's waiting, patiently...still watching me, his back ramrod straight, and eyes unreadable. I cover my own eyes, I have to get away from that look he's giving me.
What do I want? I have a duty to Seifer...I promised that I would look out for him, long ago. But Seifer didn't ask me that.
Do I *want*...Seifer? I can remember, now...one other time. Someone asking me what I wanted.
------
flashback
A little brown-haired boy is kneeling at the wave break line in the rocky beach visible from the orphanage he lives at. He's concentrating on something, you can see it in his posture, his head is bent forward, arms at his side, and his attention is directed at something below him, in the waves. It's a small toy boat.
A slightly taller blonde boy stands further up the beach from the brunette, and has been watching him for some time. The blonde straightens his shoulders breathes deeply, and approaches the kneeling figure. Today is the day he will have a friend.
"Can I play Squall?" The blonde watches, hopeful, but doesn't rouse the small boy from his concentration on the toy.
"No. Go away." The blonde bites his lip, scrunching his face up in a childish expression of disappointment.
"Whyy? I wanna be your friend!" The brunette still doesn't look up, even with the blonde's petulant tone.
"I want to be alone." The blonde boy, sick of being ignored, approaches his would-be friend, crouching down beside him. He frowns, face in a childish pout.
"C'mon... I can help you..really! I'll be your skipper." Brunette still refuses to look at the boy next to him...even when he's pleading.
"No."
"I'll...umm... do your chores for a week!" The older boy is getting desperate now.
"No." The blondes eyes glisten, boys don't cry. Especially over something this dumb. But...
"I'll do anything you want! Just tell me what you want!" The older boy's eyes widen as the brown-haired child finally...Finally looks at him, "C'mon... whatever you want! Just..." Be my friend...no one else can understand...don't make me be alone.
"What...I want?" The brunette's eyes narrow, "Is this another one of your jokes Seifer?" The blonde shakes his head in childish denial.
"Nuh-uh...whatever you want Squall! I promise!" His heart sinks as the brunette scowls and turns away, back to his boat.
"You don't care what I want! I want you to leave me alone! Just...go away." The brunettes emotional tone wasn't reflected at all on his face, but the blonde boy could tell he was upset. It wouldn't take much to make him lash out now.
Sad, the child stood up, giving one last wistful glance at his never-be friend, and walked off down the beach, to be alone. He could always try again...right?
----
back to present
Why do I remember that now, of all times. Squall sighed into his hands. It was true...Seifer had asked me what I wanted back then. But Ellone had just left...Seifer would leave too. And he had...twice now.
But he's here now...and he's asking you what you want, a small part of my mind whispers.
And that...is a problem. Because I don't think I know what I want.
No...that's a lie. I know one thing that I want. I want to help Seifer, and I want him back where he belongs. In my life.
So, it's decided then.
I give Seifer a small smile, more with my eyes than my lips, and reach up to run my hands through his hair, combing the blonde strands with my fingers. I slowly pull Seifer towards me, twining my right hand's fingers in the short hairs at the base of his neck. I gently trace Seifer's cheek, then jaw...then Adam's apple with my left hand, using my nails to caress his throat, raising goose bumps.
He's closer now...our faces are half an inch apart when he runs out of patience and leans in, sealing our lips in a chaste kiss. After about ten seconds, I part my lips, running my tongue over Seifer's closed mouth, then between his lips, asking for access. His lips part, allowing my tongue to slip into that sweet cavern.
I twine my tongue with his, coaxing it into an erotic dance with my own...and he slowly gets a more aggressive, returning my caresses, licking at my own lips.
We both need air...so I separate from him reluctantly, running my tongue over his bottom lip and capturing it in my mouth, sucking gently. When my lungs are screaming for air, I release my hold on his lips and back away far enough to try and read Seifer's reaction.
It's not what I expect.
A/N *crickets chirp* Okay.. its been awhile since I updated... Thank Aeroknight for the fact you have an update...or attack said person with large sticks. *holds up sign that says 'I do not advocate violence in any shape or form'* I'm in the latter category...since I was up till....ehh... it 6 freaking AM! Re-writing this twice.
Author: Liz Camp
Warnings: You shouldn't think that just because A single-minded person without a bone of Originality in their body would be Irritated as the thought of men fucking, it won't appear here.
Disclaimer: Nope...don't own Final Fantasy VIII. I'm gonna go cry now.
Author's Notes:
Well, it took awhile, because I had to figure out the entire plot of this fic before going any farther, and the psychology of the characters. Eh.. lame excuse... I also felt like writing something a bit more lighthearted Nowhere Man...which is headed for heavy plot too...because we're heading into angst-city soon enough with these two. Rest assured... I have a large chunk of the next chapter done too.
----Previous Chapter:
The two Seifer groupies leave the room, and I stand there, silent, until I hear the front door close. This is the first time I've been alone with Seifer since before the Sorceress war began.
Chapter 7----
"So..." I trail off. This is awkward, we're just staring at each other. I don't know what to say, I don't know what he wants me to say. I'm still stunned Seifer didn't try to injure me for going after him like that, even if it was a joke. But was it?
He was too responsive to me for him to have thought that it was a joke...and being aggressive just seemed to turn him on.
Judging by his reaction, anyway.
"-all? Squall?! For the love of Hyne...Squall, you're needed in reality!" I focus on Seifer, blocking out my thoughts. I'll take my cues from him...that way I'll at least know if he....yeah. But, his reaction was positive, even if it was unintentional. Do I want it to be positive?
"SQUALL!" Seifer is standing an inch from my face, screaming at me. I blink slowly.
"Don't have to shout, I can hear you just fine." Seifer looks ready to strangle me with his bare hands. Talk about mood swings...
"Obviously not. I've asked you...TEN TIMES to GET OUT of my bedroom, and wait for me in the LIVING ROOM!"
"All right Seifer, we have a lot to talk about." I nod to him, and leave the room, headed for his sofa.
A half-hour later, and I'm getting bored. How long does it take to put on...whatever he's putting on. Of course, I know he's not just getting dressed. Knowing Seifer, he's trying to sort out exactly what happened, and how he feels about it. He always hated being taken by surprise.
Finally...Seifer appears. Dressed exactly the same as before his shower. I shrug inwardly, he's more unnerved than I thought. Seifer sits on the opposite side of the couch. More silence...this time he's not going to speak first. Damn.
Seifer knows me better than anyone else...and I *think* the reverse is true. He's patient...when he needs to be. So basically, he'll wait me out. I'd better say something.
"I...like your house. You build it yourself?" Lame...very, very lame. Of all the conversation topics...that was the worst. But at least he has to say something now.
"Yeah...well Raaj and Fuu helped of course, but I did most of it. It was something to do, work with my hands...remember some old skills, you know." Seifer coughs self-consciously. I *hate* this...why can't I be comfortable?
"That's...nice. What have you been doing for the past seven years?" Seifer grinned his little mocking grin at me.
"Little of this, little of that. Mostly construction...some security work, home improvements, it varies. You've gone far though...Commander." I snort indignantly.
"It's not as good of a job as you'd think. You know how much I hate paperwork...that's most of what I do all day. All these obligations..." I make a disgusted face, "I'd rather be a normal SeeD...didn't have much of a choice though." Seifer makes a non-committal noise in the back of his throat, I don't think he's actually listening to me. His body language is telling though...he keeps edging closer.
He licks his lips...I don't think he realizes how much he's communicating.
I can see it in his eyes...he's asking me to do something.
"Kiss me." I say, plainly. Seifer watches me, eyes locked on mine. He's thinking...why is he thinking? He wanted this, his eyes told me so.
"Do you really want me to?" Do I...want? It's funny, no one has ever asked me that before. What do *I* want. I rest my forehead on my knees...Seifer is smart enough to know this isn't a rejection, just me thinking. He's waiting, patiently...still watching me, his back ramrod straight, and eyes unreadable. I cover my own eyes, I have to get away from that look he's giving me.
What do I want? I have a duty to Seifer...I promised that I would look out for him, long ago. But Seifer didn't ask me that.
Do I *want*...Seifer? I can remember, now...one other time. Someone asking me what I wanted.
------
flashback
A little brown-haired boy is kneeling at the wave break line in the rocky beach visible from the orphanage he lives at. He's concentrating on something, you can see it in his posture, his head is bent forward, arms at his side, and his attention is directed at something below him, in the waves. It's a small toy boat.
A slightly taller blonde boy stands further up the beach from the brunette, and has been watching him for some time. The blonde straightens his shoulders breathes deeply, and approaches the kneeling figure. Today is the day he will have a friend.
"Can I play Squall?" The blonde watches, hopeful, but doesn't rouse the small boy from his concentration on the toy.
"No. Go away." The blonde bites his lip, scrunching his face up in a childish expression of disappointment.
"Whyy? I wanna be your friend!" The brunette still doesn't look up, even with the blonde's petulant tone.
"I want to be alone." The blonde boy, sick of being ignored, approaches his would-be friend, crouching down beside him. He frowns, face in a childish pout.
"C'mon... I can help you..really! I'll be your skipper." Brunette still refuses to look at the boy next to him...even when he's pleading.
"No."
"I'll...umm... do your chores for a week!" The older boy is getting desperate now.
"No." The blondes eyes glisten, boys don't cry. Especially over something this dumb. But...
"I'll do anything you want! Just tell me what you want!" The older boy's eyes widen as the brown-haired child finally...Finally looks at him, "C'mon... whatever you want! Just..." Be my friend...no one else can understand...don't make me be alone.
"What...I want?" The brunette's eyes narrow, "Is this another one of your jokes Seifer?" The blonde shakes his head in childish denial.
"Nuh-uh...whatever you want Squall! I promise!" His heart sinks as the brunette scowls and turns away, back to his boat.
"You don't care what I want! I want you to leave me alone! Just...go away." The brunettes emotional tone wasn't reflected at all on his face, but the blonde boy could tell he was upset. It wouldn't take much to make him lash out now.
Sad, the child stood up, giving one last wistful glance at his never-be friend, and walked off down the beach, to be alone. He could always try again...right?
----
back to present
Why do I remember that now, of all times. Squall sighed into his hands. It was true...Seifer had asked me what I wanted back then. But Ellone had just left...Seifer would leave too. And he had...twice now.
But he's here now...and he's asking you what you want, a small part of my mind whispers.
And that...is a problem. Because I don't think I know what I want.
No...that's a lie. I know one thing that I want. I want to help Seifer, and I want him back where he belongs. In my life.
So, it's decided then.
I give Seifer a small smile, more with my eyes than my lips, and reach up to run my hands through his hair, combing the blonde strands with my fingers. I slowly pull Seifer towards me, twining my right hand's fingers in the short hairs at the base of his neck. I gently trace Seifer's cheek, then jaw...then Adam's apple with my left hand, using my nails to caress his throat, raising goose bumps.
He's closer now...our faces are half an inch apart when he runs out of patience and leans in, sealing our lips in a chaste kiss. After about ten seconds, I part my lips, running my tongue over Seifer's closed mouth, then between his lips, asking for access. His lips part, allowing my tongue to slip into that sweet cavern.
I twine my tongue with his, coaxing it into an erotic dance with my own...and he slowly gets a more aggressive, returning my caresses, licking at my own lips.
We both need air...so I separate from him reluctantly, running my tongue over his bottom lip and capturing it in my mouth, sucking gently. When my lungs are screaming for air, I release my hold on his lips and back away far enough to try and read Seifer's reaction.
It's not what I expect.
A/N *crickets chirp* Okay.. its been awhile since I updated... Thank Aeroknight for the fact you have an update...or attack said person with large sticks. *holds up sign that says 'I do not advocate violence in any shape or form'* I'm in the latter category...since I was up till....ehh... it 6 freaking AM! Re-writing this twice.