Title: Maxie Needs a New Bike
Author: Nefertiry
Summary: Alec, Max and Logan are planning a little scam which includes Xander's life insurance. Their biggest problem is how to 'kill' Xander. And Xander is an Immortal… Buffy/Dark Angel crossover + the concept of immortality from 'Highlander'
Pairing: Max/Xander (a/n don't freak out because of this pairing. In further chapters you'll see why I did this. And for all Max/Logan shippers – don't worry, I'm not gonna break this couple.)
Disclaimer: nothing is mine. Neither the characters of 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer', nor the characters of 'Dark Angel'. All rights belong to their respective owners.
Timeline: early season 2 of DA, after a slightly AU-ish 'Proof of Purchase'. Some events will coincide with the events in the show; some won't (as the story is absolutely AU). Everything that happened to Xander is described in UNTALENTEDTKK's 'The Finals' series. Some things will coincide with the original's story line, some will not. (I'm picking up the storyline from ch. 4 of 'TF2…' and changing some things.)
Max Needs Money
Crash
Still the same Friday night as in ch.1 and ch.2
Max and OC were sitting at their usual table and watching how Alec was getting drunk.
"What's with him?" asked OC, gesturing with her beer to Alec.
"I don't know and don't want to know", shrugged Max and sipped her beer, looking at Alec's back. Then she turned to Cindy. "I can't even look at him right now. And he still owes me money."
"Oh, come on, boo. He'll give you your money", said OC reassuringly.
"When? In the next millennium?" said Max through gritted teeth. "And that guy who could sell me a new Ninja now probably will sell it to somebody else."
"Yeah, but it's not his fault that your old Ninja is gone", shrugged OC.
"Don't remind me", grumbled Max. "First I had to drive some crappy bike that couldn't even remotely compare to my baby, but then even that crappy little Honda was ruined after that idiot that was chasing the bleached idiot hit it."
**Flashback**
4 days ago
Max was driving her little Honda through empty night streets of Seattle and cursing two certain persons responsible for the fact that she had to drive this crappy bike instead of her beloved Ninja Kawasaki. Of course, those two persons were Xander and Alec. Who else?
Xander was responsible for becoming the target in that wacky incident during which Logan lost his car and Max almost got killed, first fighting with that strange and very strong girl who somehow knew Xander from his past and then with that really creepy man who just couldn't die like all normal people were supposed to. Instead, he kept coming back to life after countless number of times Max and Logan had shot him. But when Xander cut off his head with combat knife the man finally died and THEN a strange thing happened. His headless corpse produced some kind of electricity which entered Xander and everything around exploded. Well, not literally exploded, but buildings around were seriously damaged. Anyway, in all that turmoil Max completely forgot about her bike which she had been forced to leave somewhere in the quarantine area of Terminal City while she tried to figure out what kind of a transgenic Xander was. Of course, when she returned to get her bike it wasn't there.
As for Alec… well, Alec chose the 'perfect time' to get in trouble and need her help. On the very same day when she was ready to buy a new Ninja she had to pay that sleazy lab tech for the removal of the explosive from Alec's neck… Even for that only reason Max was ready to hate him.
She was driving automatically deeply engrossed in her thoughts when something hit her and she flew off her bike and landed flat on her back. "What the fuck!" cursed Max, lying on her back and looking around, trying to see what had hit her. She saw a man lying not far from her. He was lying prone and seemed to be not breathing. Max rose to her feet and came up to him. "Hey, are you ok?" she leaned to him.
The man rolled on his back, opened his eyes and saw the girl, standing near him. "You…" he growled and jumped to his feet, trying to grab her. Max jumped back and stared at him. "What the heck are you doing?" He seemed strangely familiar. Oh, yeah, it was that guy from the Mustang…
"You, bitch, stole my car", growled the man, lunging at Max.
"I had to get to Seattle", smirked Max, punching him in the nose.
The horrible sound of screeching metal behind Max made her turn around and yell from anger. "Nooooo!"
An old beaten up Buick hit her bike and it flew several meters away and crashed against the wall.
"My bike!!!"
"Spike!"
"Angel!"
Three yells sounded as one.
Max ran up to her wrecked Honda, Angel stormed out of the car and ran to Spike who was holding his bleeding nose and shouting obscenities about Max and all her relatives.
"I told you I'd find you", hissed Angel, drawing a stake from his pocket.
"Sod off, you old wanker!!" shouted Spike, licking the blood from his hands. "If this bitch hadn't stolen my car you'd never had found me."
"Who are you calling bitch here?" asked Max with unveiled menace in her voice, coming up to them.
"Miss, you should get out of here" warned her Angel, not taking his eyes off Spike. "It's not safe for you to be here."
"You think?" said Max sarcastically. "Wow, I haven't noticed."
"Get out of here", said Angel.
"And how am I supposed to do that?" she wondered, placing her hands on her hips and tilting her head. "My bike is ruined and I don't see any taxi around here." Then she looked around. "On second thought…" She ran up to Angel's Buick and jerked the door open. "This will do."
Max got into the car and started the engine. "So long, suckers", she said, seeing the astonished face of the dark-haired man who was staring at the car. The blonde man smirked. "Join the club, moron." The screech of tires and roar of motor told Angel that he had just lost the car. All he could do was stare at the red tail lights of the car that was quickly driving away.
**End of flashback**
"You stole the guy's car…" laughed Cindy. "I thought you didn't like cars."
"Yes, I don't like to drive something that has more than two wheels, but I didn't have much choice", shrugged Max. "Do you want this car?"
"No, it's a piece of junk", shook her head OC. "But you could sell it. You could use a couple of hundred bucks after what happened today."
Max winced. "I'm not worried about the money - after all, Normal didn't pay us much. I'm more worried about the sector pass."
"After all these threats Normal finally did it…" drawled Cindy. "Don't worry, boo, he'll regret about that."
Max smiled sadly. "Y'know, I never thought I'd say that but I'll miss Jam Pony, the guys there. But most of all I'll miss my sector pass…"
**Flashback**
This day promised to be like the other days – Normal's 'bip, bip, bip', his bitching about lazy workers and undelivered packages, the usual stuff that became a part of her life.
Jam Pony
"Well, hello, missy-miss", said Normal sarcastically, seeing Max enter the building and approach the dispatch center. "You're only 5 minutes late. In your case it's on time. That must be a record for the Guinness book!"
"Normal, aren't you tired of all this?" said Max tilting her head and looking at her boss. "Get used to me coming to work late or not coming at all. And get used to the thought that working for you isn't the dream of every young person in Seattle. Now, do you have anything for me?" she said with a charming smile while Normal was looking at her with his mouth agape.
"Oh, I think I'll get used to YOUR NOT COMING TO WORK AT ALL!" shouted Normal so loudly that everyone at Jam Pony stared at him. "You're FIRED!"
"Yeah, whatever", snorted Max. "Like you don't fire other messengers about five times a day."
"No, this time it's for real", hissed Normal. "This time you're fired permanently. So, get your scrawny ass otta here and I don't want to see you ever in my life again."
"Hey, Normal, chill", Xander came up to the dispatch center and leaned against it. "What did she do to you that you're firing her?"
"Do you want to get fired too, Alexander?" Normal looked at him.
"No, no", Xander backed away. "But why do you have to fire Max?"
"Yeah, Normal, what bit your ass that you had to fire Max?" asked OC narrowing her eyes.
Normal looked at the crowd that gathered around Max. She had a lot of supporters, but Normal had to show them who the boss here was. "If you, morons, don't get packages and get your asses on your bikes in the next two minutes, you'll all follow your friend. Bip, bip, bip, losers."
As much as Jam Pony crew loved Max they had to take the packages and get on the runs.
"Cindy, go", whispered Max to her best friend who didn't pay attention to Normal's words and stayed with Max. "I don't want you to lose your job. Go, I'll be fine."
"I'll see you tonight at Crash, boo", said OC, giving Max a small smile and then a venomous glare to Normal, took the package and left the building.
Without a word Max went to the exit. "And where do you think you're going?" she heard Normal's voice behind her back. She turned around and stared at Normal. "Either you have split personalities or a selective amnesia", smirked Max. "You've just fired me."
"Yes, I know. Now, the sector pass." He stretched his hand to take it. "You don't work here anymore. So, you have no right to use Jam Pony ID."
"Damn you, Normal!" growled Max. "How am I supposed to get through the check points without it?"
"It's not my problem anymore", shook his head Normal, grinning evilly. "Beat it."
'I want to kill him. Right now, with my bare hands', thought Max grimly, feeling her predator instincts wake up in her. She looked at Normal as if he were a big fat gray rat, no, a nasty fat cockroach, that she wanted to squash.
"Why are you staring at me?" asked Normal suspiciously. He didn't like the way Max was looking at him.
Max cast a 'you're not worthy of my attention' look at him and decided that she had enough of Normal for today.
"And don't take the bicycle with you", shouted Normal to her. "It's the property of Jam Pony."
**End of flashback**
"What did I do to deserve this?" moaned Max, dropping her head on her hands. "First my Ninja, then my Honda, and now I lost my job, the sector pass and the bicycle."
"Everything's gonna be ok", said softly OC, patting Max on the shoulder.
"I need money, Cindy", whimpered Max, raising her head and looking at her. "I guess I'll have to get back to stealing."
"What's with them?" murmured Cindy, looking at something behind Max's back.
"With whom?" asked Max, turning to see what Cindy was talking about. She saw Alec and Logan almost lying on the counter and Xander sitting near them and looking rather confused.
The girls stood up from their table and went to the bar.
"Xander, what happened to them?" wondered Max, seeing Logan and Alec in a very miserable condition.
"They're drunk and looks like they both need money", replied Xander.
"And who doesn't?" snorted Max. "I see neither of them is in condition to drive, so I'll drive Logan home and can you drive Alec?"
"Why me?" scowled Xander. "Just leave him here or let him drive. I won't miss him if he gets killed in a car crash", shrugged Xander who didn't have any warm feelings towards Alec.
"I heard that", mumbled Alec.
"Xander, please. I don't like Alec as much as you do, but I can't let him die. At least not until he gives me my money back", said Max.
"That's very sweet of you, Maxie", murmured Alec.
"Fine", sighed Xander. "Let's go, you drunken piece of shit", he said to Alec
"When I sober up a little, I'll show you 'piece of shit'", said Alec, getting off the stool and standing on wobbly legs.
"C'mon, Logan, get up", said Max softly, trying to lift Logan from his stool.
"Noo, mommy, I don't want to go to school today", mumbled Logan with his eyes shut. He grabbed the counter and didn't want to move.
"I'm not your mommy, Logan. Now, be a good boy and get off this stool", said Max, trying hard not to laugh. She had to admit Logan looked pretty ridiculous when he was drunk. She finally peeled him off the counter and helped him stand in a relatively vertical position.
"Oopsy, someone is shaking the floor", giggled Logan, waving his hands for balance. He almost fell but she caught him.
"How much did he drink?" asked Max, with Logan hanging on her right shoulder.
"Three double vodkas", replied the bartender. "And he hasn't paid for them, by the way."
"I'll pay." Max fumbled in her pockets looking for some money. "Here." She gave him the money. Then she felt that Logan relaxed and put his head on her shoulder. "Logan, move your feet. I'm not a freaking superwoman to carry you on me." She gave him a nudge on the ribs.
"I'm awake, I'm awake", Logan's head jerked up, but his gaze was still bleary.
"Do you at least remember how to walk?" smirked Alec who had a very high level of alcohol in his blood but looked much better than Logan, thanks to his transgenic metabolism.
"You haven't paid for your drinks either", the bartender pointed at Alec.
Alec fished out some cash from the back pocket of his jeans. "Will this do?"
The bartender nodded.
Alec moved to the exit - slowly, trying to keep some sort of balance, but without anybody's help, unlike Logan, who couldn't walk on his own.
*
"Nice wheels", whistled Alec, seeing Xander's Porsche.
"If you puke in the car, you'll have to clean it up", warned him Xander, getting in car.
Max and Cindy carefully led Logan outside where they faced a dilemma – whether they should take Logan's Lada or Angel's Buick, which actually became Max's.
"I don't know how to drive this car", whispered Max, looking at the 'wonder' of Russian car industry. The 'wonder' had an incredible and indescribable color – something between orange and yellow. That color was a serious abuse to human eye and Max started to doubt Logan's sanity for choosing the car of this color.
"Let's take the Buick", suggested OC and Max nodded. "Yes, at least its color is less … hmm…"
"Ugly?" said Cindy.
"Something like that", laughed Max. "Help me load Logan in the car, please."
The girls loaded mumbling Logan in the backseat, Max took the driver's seat and OC got in the passenger's seat.
"Your boy's gonna have a hell of a hangover", chuckled Cindy when Max started the engine.
"Can't wait to see it", snickered Max and drove off.
*
Xander's Porsche
Xander was driving the car and casting glances at Alec from time to time. He feared that Alec might get sick and throw up in the car, but his worries were groundless. Alec sat quietly with his eyes closed and didn't show any signs that he was feeling sick.
"Where to?" asked Xander.
"What?" Alec's eyes snapped open and he looked around.
"Where do you live?"
"Sector 6, 165 Eagle, Motel 'Space Needle'", replied Alec.
Xander snickered. "Nice name."
*
"Is this your motel?" asked Xander when an hour later he stopped the car at the address Alec had given to him.
"Looks like", whispered Alec, suddenly getting pale. "Perfect, just fucking perfect."
TBC
A/N I have nothing against Honda motorcycles, but I had to give Max some bike while her Ninja was gone :) and Honda was the only thing I could come up with.
Reviews pleas.