LOOK WHO IT IS AGAIN!!! Yup, it's you. You know, I'm not sick of seeing
your face, because in order for me to see you, that means you're reading
this wonderful story! Thank you! I hope I keep seeing your [not] ugly face!
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
HIEI: This is uncomfortable. How far are you gonna drive with us like this?
DRIVER (aka COP #199): Down to the institution.
SHADOW: Insti--- You mean the looney bin?!
DRIVER (aka COP #199): Yes, if you want to say it that way.
HIEI: I'M NOT INSANE, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW!!!
DRIVER (aka COP #199): That's what they all say.
HIEI: *sulking* Well I'm not.
SHADOW: There's that same reader again, Hiei. I swear... READ THE STORY AND DON'T WATCH US SUFFERING IN THE BACK OF A COP CAR WITH STRAIGHT JACKETS!!!
*~*~ FORWARD IS THE GENERAL DIRECTION IN WHICH WE VENTURE!!! ~*~*
CHAPITER FWEE
Excuses
SHADOW: Muwahaha. All the recorders are in place. They're set with motion detectors, so whenever somebody goes in the bathroom, it'll start recording. Hopefully nobody will go during the middle of the night.
HIEI: Yes, right... I'm tired.
SHADOW: It's 11:30 pm.
KURAMA: Why were you guys in the bathrooms for ten minutes?
*Hiei and Shadow exchange guilty glances*
SHADOW: Oh god, sick idea, sick idea, sick idea... MAKE IT GO AWAAAAYYYY!!!
HIEI: *whispers to Kurama* Shadow was consipated.
CROWBAR: WHACK!!!
HIEI: OW!!!
SHADOW: I WAS NOT CONSTIPATED!!! IF I HAD BEEN CONSTIPATED, YOU WOULD HAVE THOUGHT SOMEBODY WAS WATCHING DRAGONBALL Z!!!
HIEI: Huh?
SHADOW: *talking very fast* Haven't you ever heard Goku power up? Man, that is a SERIOUS case of constipation there. Then, when they show his opponent powering up, that's when Goku goes into the bathroom and has explosive diarrhea.
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *sweatdrop*
SHADOW: Didn't you know that?
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *shake head no*
SHADOW: Well I'm fairly sure that's what happens.
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *nod*
SHADOW: Good night! *walks away*
HIEI & KURAMA: *sigh of relief*
SHADOW: *peeks back around the door frame* None of you better have explosive diarrhea in my bathrooms, either.
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *slowly fall over, drowning in sweatdrops*
SHADOW: *cheerfully* Good night!
HIEI & KURAMA: *in unnaturally high-pitched voices* Good night.
HIEI: *once he's sure Shadow is out of earshot* EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA?!
KURAMA: Where does that girl get those ideas?
HIEI: Hecked if I know. I think they just pop into her head and she says them before she can do anything about it.
*at this point, both of them start sounding quite bored*
KURAMA: Great... You know what?
HIEI: What?
KURAMA: When you fell over, you landed on my chest, and it hurt.
HIEI: Really.
KURAMA: Could you get up?
HIEI: I suppose it would be possible, yes.
KURAMA: Will you?
HIEI: Yes I will. *moves and sits on the floor*
KURAMA: Thank you. *sits up*
HIEI: You know what?
KURAMA: No, I don't know anything. What?
HIEI: Shadow has pictures of us tacked up on her bedroom door. On the outside. So people walking in the halls can see.
KURAMA: Really.
HIEI: Yeah. She's also got a picture of a roadkill pigeon.
KURAMA: Great.
HIEI: And a cheese wheel.
KURAMA: That's interesting.
HIEI: Yes it is.
KURAMA: I'm tired.
HIEI: Good night. *gets up and walks away*
KURAMA: Right. *gets up and goes into the guest bedroom on the second floor and falls asleep instantly*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~ The next morning!!! Aren't we HAPPY?! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Hiei and Shadow are sitting at the kitchen table with one of their little tape players and headphones, snickering evilly*
KURAMA: What's so-- Hey! What's on the tape?
SHADOW: O_O Nothing...
HIEI: Nothing you'd care to hear, unless you like to hear something that sounds like somebody scraping their fingernails down a chalk board... *snicker*
*Kurama stares at the two for a minute*
KURAMA: Wait a sec...
HIEI: Uh oh.
KURAMA: YOU LOUSY PEOPLE!!! GOING AND PLANTING THAT THING IN--- OOOOHHH, I SHOULD KILL YOU!!!
SHADOW: RUN!!!
*Hiei and Shadow take off running, being sure to take their tape player with them*
KURAMA: YOU LOUSY PEOPLE!!! I WILL KILL YOU!!! *chases them*
SHADOW: *laughing all the while, she runs upstairs, into her room, and grabs her video camera, darting back out of the room just as Kurama shoots down the hall after her**she focuses the camera on her face* I'm being hunted by a fox boy! I recorded him singing in the shower this morning, and now I'm afraid I will die! In case I do, I leave everything to Hiei! Including this lovely blackmail material. *starts playing the tape*
KURAMA: *turns red* YOU!!! GET BACK HERE!!! *practically flattens Yusuke in the hall*
YUSUKE: WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, FOX BOY!!!
SHADOW: *holding the camera over her shoulder so she can record Kurama as he chases her* I'm gonna die!!! *slides down the railing on the stairs and runs out the door*
DOOR: SLAM!!!
KURAMA: Shut up, stupid door.
LOCK: Click.
KURAMA: You can't lock me in, retard girl! This locks from the inside!!!
LOCK: Un-click.
*Kurama runs outside*
DOOR: SLAM!!!
SHADOW: *focusing the camera on Kurama* HIEI, GET OUT HERE!!!
HIEI: *standing on the roof* Hi, Shadow!
SHADOW: *turns the camera up to Hiei* Hello!
KURAMA: *tackles Shadow and steals the tape player* HA!!!
SHADOW: Jackass!!! Hiei, get him!!!
KURAMA: *runs inside*
DOOR: SLAM!!!
LOCK: Click.
SHADOW: CURSE YOU, FOX BOY!!!
KURAMA: Hang on a second!
SHADOW: *peeks in the window with her camera, still recording* Hey!!!
KURAMA: *rips the tape to pieces and throws it on the floor and stomps on it* Okay! *unlocks the door and opens it* Nobody blackmails me. ^_^
SHADOW: *muttering curses* Stupid fox...
KURAMA: I'm stupid? You thought I wouldn't figure out that there were tape recorders in there.
SHADOW: We weren't going to blackmail you! We... uh... thought you had a nice voice! And we... uh... were gonna make a CD called... uh... something! And sell it! And give you 50% of the profit!
KURAMA: Bull.
SHADOW: Where?
KURAMA: Huh?
SHADOW: Never mind. *turns off her video camera*
KURAMA: Hmm...
HIEI: *walks in the door* What's hmm?
SHADOW: I don't think we want to know.
HIEI: Is Kuwabara still here?
SHADOW: I think. Why?
HIEI: Oh... No reason... *walks away, laughing evilly*
KURAMA: I don't think that's a good thing. You should have lied.
SHADOW: I didn't give a definite answer. I'm not sure he is here.
*from another room*
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOO!!!
*back with Shadow and Kurama*
KURAMA: He's here.
SHADOW: Obviously, genius.
KURAMA: I wonder what Hiei's doing to him.
SHADOW: Blackmailing him, of course. What else?
KURAMA: Huh. I'm gonna go watch.
SHADOW: Cool. *follows Kurama into the den*
*Kuwabara is sitting on the floor with his cat in his arms. Hiei is standing over him, laughing evilly*
HIEI: Well?
KUWABARA: NOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: Hm. Then I guess there'll be a public showing at your school...
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: Why not? Don't want your little sidekicks to see you making out with a pillow?
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: *evil snicker* *notices Shadow and Kurama* Oh, hi, you two.
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
YUSUKE: *from another room* MAKE THAT LOSER SHUT UP!!!
HIEI: Yeah, you heard him. Shut up, Kuwabara.
KUWABARA: NN--- Hmph? *Shadow stuck Eikichi (the cat) in Kuwabara's mouth*
SHADOW: That's better.
EIKICHI: MEOW!!!
KUWABARA: *spits her out* Shadow, you bitch!
SHADOW: Aaaawwwww, you cussed!!!
KUWABARA: SO?
HIEI: Back to blackmailing...
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: Yes.
KURAMA: What are you trying to get from him?
YUSUKE: *walking by* Hiei wants Shizuru and he's bribing Kuwabara for half an hour alone with her...
HIEI: *throws Eikichi at Yusuke* No I don't and No I'm not!!!
YUSUKE: *dodges the flying cat* You lie!
EIKICHI: MREOW!!! *hits the wall*
KUWABARA: EIKICHI!!!
HIEI: *laughing*
YUSUKE: Oh, sorry Hiei, I forgot! You love Shadow! Not Shizuru!!
HIEI & SHADOW: HEY! *Hiei throws a potted plant at Yusuke, while Shadow...*
CROWBAR: WHACK!!!
YUSUKE: HOLY HELL, GIRL!!! WHERE DO YOU GET THESE THINGS? *gets hit with the potted plant, which happened to be a cactus* HOLY HELLO, HIEI!!!
HIEI: *laughing evilly as Yusuke claws at his face to get the cactus thorns out* You needed it, Yusuke.
YUSUKE: THAT'S DEBATABLE!!!
SHADOW: *nodding* He needed it.
HIEI: HEY! *throws a bucket at Kuwabara, who was trying to sneak away with his cat*
SHADOW: *pulls out her camera*
BUCKET: THUD.
CAMERA: Snap!
KUWABARA: MOMMYYYYY!!!
*Everyone is laughing at Yusuke the cactus face and Kuwabara the bucket head. They run away angrily while Hiei, Shadow, and Kurama just keep laughing*
KURAMA: You never answered me, Hiei.
HIEI: What?
KURAMA: About what you were blackmailing Kuwabara for.
HIEI: Nothing. I was just saying that I wanted to eat his cat, and if he didn't let me, then I'd show his whole school the pillow make-out session video.
SHADOW: Nice.
HIEI: Isn't it though?
KURAMA: You wouldn't really eat his cat, would you?
HIEI: No.
KURAMA: Then what were you planning to do with it if he gave it to you?
HIEI: Something equivalent to eating it, I guess. I didn't figure he'd give her to me. I just wanted him to go through the torture of having to decide whether he liked his cat or his pride more.
SHADOW: Good one! *slaps Hiei a high-five*
KURAMA: *sarcastically* You two are too kind.
SHADOW & HIEI: *with identical happy evil smiles and their arms around each others' shoulders* Yes, aren't we?
KURAMA: *grabs Shadow's camera and snaps a picture of the two rotten little blackmailing demons (nice description, huh?)* Ha!
SHADOW: My camera!
KURAMA: *grins evilly* You'll find that I can be just as evil.
SHADOW: GIMME MY CAMERA!!!
KURAMA: How many pictures of me are there in here? Hmmm... I think I'll just steal your camera and get these developed. *starts walking away*
CROWBAR: SHWAM!!!
KURAMA: HOLY HELL, GIRL, WHERE DO YOU KEEP THESE THINGS?
SHADOW: *smiling and nuzzling her camera* Yay!
KURAMA: I hate you sometimes. *he has a big lump on his head*
HIEI: ^_^ Aren't we kind?
KURAMA: -_- I hate you sometimes too, Hiei.
HIEI: ^_^
SHADOW: *snaps a picture of Hiei with his happy smug smile on his face*
HIEI: O_O ... -_- Sometimes I hate you, Shadow.
SHADOW: ^_^ I'm good at making people hate me, it seems. Join the club.
YUSUKE: *at the top of the stairs* Yeah, a Shadow hate club! Good idea!
SHADOW: Grrr... *shoots up the stairs*
CROWBAR: CLONK!!!
YUSUKE: *spaced out* Weehee...
KURAMA: *looking thoughtful* Hmm...
HIEI: There's that "hmm" again, Kurama. WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING?
KURAMA: *walking away and still looking thoughtful* Hmm...
HIEI: Are you listening?
KURAMA: Huh-uh. Hmm...
HIEI: YOU STUPID FOX!!!
BASEBALL BAT: CRACK!
KURAMA: O_O Oooowwwwwwwwww...
HIEI: YOU SHOULD LISTEN WHEN PEOPLE TALK TO YOU!!! WHAT ARE YOU "HMM"ING ABOUT?!
KURAMA: Weeeee... *falls over*
SHADOW: *laughing*
*Hiei turns around to see Shadow with her video camera*
SHADOW: *smiling* Child abuse.
HIEI: Oh, cut me a break, Shadow.
SHADOW: ^_^ I know. Just kidding.
KURAMA: *gets up, rubbing his head* I was "hmm"ing because I was thinking about something that you probably would kill me for thinking!
HIEI: *lightly swinging a baseball bat and tapping his foot* Yes?
KURAMA: *staring at the baseball bat* I was thinking that Yusuke, Kuwabara and I should gang up on you two and get revenge for embarassing us. *runs away*
DOOR: Slam!
HIEI: Curse him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*mocking the DBZ narrator* Oh no! Will Hiei and Shadow be ganged up on? Will they feel what they've been putting their friends through? Will they be blackmailed, embarassed, and threatened? *sounding fakely horrified* OH MY GOD!!! YOU BETTER WAIT TO FIND OUT! TUNE IN NEXT TIME! OOOOOOHHHHH
CROWBAR: SLAM!
Weehhee...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Hiei and Shadow are now in a little white rubber room together, still in straight jackets, and chained to the wall*
HIEI: This is all that stupid narrator's fault. And I can't even kill him for revenge. The cops took care of that. Stupid cops.
SHADOW: Stupid looney bin.
HIEI: Stupid narrator.
SHADOW: Stupid Hiei.
HIEI: What'd I do?
SHADOW: You hired the stupid narrator in the first place!
HIEI: Did not, retard! That was you!
SHADOW: Wait. No, it wasn't. If you didn't hire him, who did?
*twilight zone music plays*
*~* somewhere else *~*
KUWABARA: I wonder how Hiei is dealing with that narrator I hired?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
HIEI: This is uncomfortable. How far are you gonna drive with us like this?
DRIVER (aka COP #199): Down to the institution.
SHADOW: Insti--- You mean the looney bin?!
DRIVER (aka COP #199): Yes, if you want to say it that way.
HIEI: I'M NOT INSANE, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW!!!
DRIVER (aka COP #199): That's what they all say.
HIEI: *sulking* Well I'm not.
SHADOW: There's that same reader again, Hiei. I swear... READ THE STORY AND DON'T WATCH US SUFFERING IN THE BACK OF A COP CAR WITH STRAIGHT JACKETS!!!
*~*~ FORWARD IS THE GENERAL DIRECTION IN WHICH WE VENTURE!!! ~*~*
CHAPITER FWEE
Excuses
SHADOW: Muwahaha. All the recorders are in place. They're set with motion detectors, so whenever somebody goes in the bathroom, it'll start recording. Hopefully nobody will go during the middle of the night.
HIEI: Yes, right... I'm tired.
SHADOW: It's 11:30 pm.
KURAMA: Why were you guys in the bathrooms for ten minutes?
*Hiei and Shadow exchange guilty glances*
SHADOW: Oh god, sick idea, sick idea, sick idea... MAKE IT GO AWAAAAYYYY!!!
HIEI: *whispers to Kurama* Shadow was consipated.
CROWBAR: WHACK!!!
HIEI: OW!!!
SHADOW: I WAS NOT CONSTIPATED!!! IF I HAD BEEN CONSTIPATED, YOU WOULD HAVE THOUGHT SOMEBODY WAS WATCHING DRAGONBALL Z!!!
HIEI: Huh?
SHADOW: *talking very fast* Haven't you ever heard Goku power up? Man, that is a SERIOUS case of constipation there. Then, when they show his opponent powering up, that's when Goku goes into the bathroom and has explosive diarrhea.
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *sweatdrop*
SHADOW: Didn't you know that?
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *shake head no*
SHADOW: Well I'm fairly sure that's what happens.
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *nod*
SHADOW: Good night! *walks away*
HIEI & KURAMA: *sigh of relief*
SHADOW: *peeks back around the door frame* None of you better have explosive diarrhea in my bathrooms, either.
HIEI & KURAMA: O_O *slowly fall over, drowning in sweatdrops*
SHADOW: *cheerfully* Good night!
HIEI & KURAMA: *in unnaturally high-pitched voices* Good night.
HIEI: *once he's sure Shadow is out of earshot* EXPLOSIVE DIARRHEA?!
KURAMA: Where does that girl get those ideas?
HIEI: Hecked if I know. I think they just pop into her head and she says them before she can do anything about it.
*at this point, both of them start sounding quite bored*
KURAMA: Great... You know what?
HIEI: What?
KURAMA: When you fell over, you landed on my chest, and it hurt.
HIEI: Really.
KURAMA: Could you get up?
HIEI: I suppose it would be possible, yes.
KURAMA: Will you?
HIEI: Yes I will. *moves and sits on the floor*
KURAMA: Thank you. *sits up*
HIEI: You know what?
KURAMA: No, I don't know anything. What?
HIEI: Shadow has pictures of us tacked up on her bedroom door. On the outside. So people walking in the halls can see.
KURAMA: Really.
HIEI: Yeah. She's also got a picture of a roadkill pigeon.
KURAMA: Great.
HIEI: And a cheese wheel.
KURAMA: That's interesting.
HIEI: Yes it is.
KURAMA: I'm tired.
HIEI: Good night. *gets up and walks away*
KURAMA: Right. *gets up and goes into the guest bedroom on the second floor and falls asleep instantly*
~*~*~*~*~*~*~ The next morning!!! Aren't we HAPPY?! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Hiei and Shadow are sitting at the kitchen table with one of their little tape players and headphones, snickering evilly*
KURAMA: What's so-- Hey! What's on the tape?
SHADOW: O_O Nothing...
HIEI: Nothing you'd care to hear, unless you like to hear something that sounds like somebody scraping their fingernails down a chalk board... *snicker*
*Kurama stares at the two for a minute*
KURAMA: Wait a sec...
HIEI: Uh oh.
KURAMA: YOU LOUSY PEOPLE!!! GOING AND PLANTING THAT THING IN--- OOOOHHH, I SHOULD KILL YOU!!!
SHADOW: RUN!!!
*Hiei and Shadow take off running, being sure to take their tape player with them*
KURAMA: YOU LOUSY PEOPLE!!! I WILL KILL YOU!!! *chases them*
SHADOW: *laughing all the while, she runs upstairs, into her room, and grabs her video camera, darting back out of the room just as Kurama shoots down the hall after her**she focuses the camera on her face* I'm being hunted by a fox boy! I recorded him singing in the shower this morning, and now I'm afraid I will die! In case I do, I leave everything to Hiei! Including this lovely blackmail material. *starts playing the tape*
KURAMA: *turns red* YOU!!! GET BACK HERE!!! *practically flattens Yusuke in the hall*
YUSUKE: WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, FOX BOY!!!
SHADOW: *holding the camera over her shoulder so she can record Kurama as he chases her* I'm gonna die!!! *slides down the railing on the stairs and runs out the door*
DOOR: SLAM!!!
KURAMA: Shut up, stupid door.
LOCK: Click.
KURAMA: You can't lock me in, retard girl! This locks from the inside!!!
LOCK: Un-click.
*Kurama runs outside*
DOOR: SLAM!!!
SHADOW: *focusing the camera on Kurama* HIEI, GET OUT HERE!!!
HIEI: *standing on the roof* Hi, Shadow!
SHADOW: *turns the camera up to Hiei* Hello!
KURAMA: *tackles Shadow and steals the tape player* HA!!!
SHADOW: Jackass!!! Hiei, get him!!!
KURAMA: *runs inside*
DOOR: SLAM!!!
LOCK: Click.
SHADOW: CURSE YOU, FOX BOY!!!
KURAMA: Hang on a second!
SHADOW: *peeks in the window with her camera, still recording* Hey!!!
KURAMA: *rips the tape to pieces and throws it on the floor and stomps on it* Okay! *unlocks the door and opens it* Nobody blackmails me. ^_^
SHADOW: *muttering curses* Stupid fox...
KURAMA: I'm stupid? You thought I wouldn't figure out that there were tape recorders in there.
SHADOW: We weren't going to blackmail you! We... uh... thought you had a nice voice! And we... uh... were gonna make a CD called... uh... something! And sell it! And give you 50% of the profit!
KURAMA: Bull.
SHADOW: Where?
KURAMA: Huh?
SHADOW: Never mind. *turns off her video camera*
KURAMA: Hmm...
HIEI: *walks in the door* What's hmm?
SHADOW: I don't think we want to know.
HIEI: Is Kuwabara still here?
SHADOW: I think. Why?
HIEI: Oh... No reason... *walks away, laughing evilly*
KURAMA: I don't think that's a good thing. You should have lied.
SHADOW: I didn't give a definite answer. I'm not sure he is here.
*from another room*
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOO!!!
*back with Shadow and Kurama*
KURAMA: He's here.
SHADOW: Obviously, genius.
KURAMA: I wonder what Hiei's doing to him.
SHADOW: Blackmailing him, of course. What else?
KURAMA: Huh. I'm gonna go watch.
SHADOW: Cool. *follows Kurama into the den*
*Kuwabara is sitting on the floor with his cat in his arms. Hiei is standing over him, laughing evilly*
HIEI: Well?
KUWABARA: NOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: Hm. Then I guess there'll be a public showing at your school...
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: Why not? Don't want your little sidekicks to see you making out with a pillow?
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: *evil snicker* *notices Shadow and Kurama* Oh, hi, you two.
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
YUSUKE: *from another room* MAKE THAT LOSER SHUT UP!!!
HIEI: Yeah, you heard him. Shut up, Kuwabara.
KUWABARA: NN--- Hmph? *Shadow stuck Eikichi (the cat) in Kuwabara's mouth*
SHADOW: That's better.
EIKICHI: MEOW!!!
KUWABARA: *spits her out* Shadow, you bitch!
SHADOW: Aaaawwwww, you cussed!!!
KUWABARA: SO?
HIEI: Back to blackmailing...
KUWABARA: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
HIEI: Yes.
KURAMA: What are you trying to get from him?
YUSUKE: *walking by* Hiei wants Shizuru and he's bribing Kuwabara for half an hour alone with her...
HIEI: *throws Eikichi at Yusuke* No I don't and No I'm not!!!
YUSUKE: *dodges the flying cat* You lie!
EIKICHI: MREOW!!! *hits the wall*
KUWABARA: EIKICHI!!!
HIEI: *laughing*
YUSUKE: Oh, sorry Hiei, I forgot! You love Shadow! Not Shizuru!!
HIEI & SHADOW: HEY! *Hiei throws a potted plant at Yusuke, while Shadow...*
CROWBAR: WHACK!!!
YUSUKE: HOLY HELL, GIRL!!! WHERE DO YOU GET THESE THINGS? *gets hit with the potted plant, which happened to be a cactus* HOLY HELLO, HIEI!!!
HIEI: *laughing evilly as Yusuke claws at his face to get the cactus thorns out* You needed it, Yusuke.
YUSUKE: THAT'S DEBATABLE!!!
SHADOW: *nodding* He needed it.
HIEI: HEY! *throws a bucket at Kuwabara, who was trying to sneak away with his cat*
SHADOW: *pulls out her camera*
BUCKET: THUD.
CAMERA: Snap!
KUWABARA: MOMMYYYYY!!!
*Everyone is laughing at Yusuke the cactus face and Kuwabara the bucket head. They run away angrily while Hiei, Shadow, and Kurama just keep laughing*
KURAMA: You never answered me, Hiei.
HIEI: What?
KURAMA: About what you were blackmailing Kuwabara for.
HIEI: Nothing. I was just saying that I wanted to eat his cat, and if he didn't let me, then I'd show his whole school the pillow make-out session video.
SHADOW: Nice.
HIEI: Isn't it though?
KURAMA: You wouldn't really eat his cat, would you?
HIEI: No.
KURAMA: Then what were you planning to do with it if he gave it to you?
HIEI: Something equivalent to eating it, I guess. I didn't figure he'd give her to me. I just wanted him to go through the torture of having to decide whether he liked his cat or his pride more.
SHADOW: Good one! *slaps Hiei a high-five*
KURAMA: *sarcastically* You two are too kind.
SHADOW & HIEI: *with identical happy evil smiles and their arms around each others' shoulders* Yes, aren't we?
KURAMA: *grabs Shadow's camera and snaps a picture of the two rotten little blackmailing demons (nice description, huh?)* Ha!
SHADOW: My camera!
KURAMA: *grins evilly* You'll find that I can be just as evil.
SHADOW: GIMME MY CAMERA!!!
KURAMA: How many pictures of me are there in here? Hmmm... I think I'll just steal your camera and get these developed. *starts walking away*
CROWBAR: SHWAM!!!
KURAMA: HOLY HELL, GIRL, WHERE DO YOU KEEP THESE THINGS?
SHADOW: *smiling and nuzzling her camera* Yay!
KURAMA: I hate you sometimes. *he has a big lump on his head*
HIEI: ^_^ Aren't we kind?
KURAMA: -_- I hate you sometimes too, Hiei.
HIEI: ^_^
SHADOW: *snaps a picture of Hiei with his happy smug smile on his face*
HIEI: O_O ... -_- Sometimes I hate you, Shadow.
SHADOW: ^_^ I'm good at making people hate me, it seems. Join the club.
YUSUKE: *at the top of the stairs* Yeah, a Shadow hate club! Good idea!
SHADOW: Grrr... *shoots up the stairs*
CROWBAR: CLONK!!!
YUSUKE: *spaced out* Weehee...
KURAMA: *looking thoughtful* Hmm...
HIEI: There's that "hmm" again, Kurama. WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING?
KURAMA: *walking away and still looking thoughtful* Hmm...
HIEI: Are you listening?
KURAMA: Huh-uh. Hmm...
HIEI: YOU STUPID FOX!!!
BASEBALL BAT: CRACK!
KURAMA: O_O Oooowwwwwwwwww...
HIEI: YOU SHOULD LISTEN WHEN PEOPLE TALK TO YOU!!! WHAT ARE YOU "HMM"ING ABOUT?!
KURAMA: Weeeee... *falls over*
SHADOW: *laughing*
*Hiei turns around to see Shadow with her video camera*
SHADOW: *smiling* Child abuse.
HIEI: Oh, cut me a break, Shadow.
SHADOW: ^_^ I know. Just kidding.
KURAMA: *gets up, rubbing his head* I was "hmm"ing because I was thinking about something that you probably would kill me for thinking!
HIEI: *lightly swinging a baseball bat and tapping his foot* Yes?
KURAMA: *staring at the baseball bat* I was thinking that Yusuke, Kuwabara and I should gang up on you two and get revenge for embarassing us. *runs away*
DOOR: Slam!
HIEI: Curse him.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*mocking the DBZ narrator* Oh no! Will Hiei and Shadow be ganged up on? Will they feel what they've been putting their friends through? Will they be blackmailed, embarassed, and threatened? *sounding fakely horrified* OH MY GOD!!! YOU BETTER WAIT TO FIND OUT! TUNE IN NEXT TIME! OOOOOOHHHHH
CROWBAR: SLAM!
Weehhee...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
*Hiei and Shadow are now in a little white rubber room together, still in straight jackets, and chained to the wall*
HIEI: This is all that stupid narrator's fault. And I can't even kill him for revenge. The cops took care of that. Stupid cops.
SHADOW: Stupid looney bin.
HIEI: Stupid narrator.
SHADOW: Stupid Hiei.
HIEI: What'd I do?
SHADOW: You hired the stupid narrator in the first place!
HIEI: Did not, retard! That was you!
SHADOW: Wait. No, it wasn't. If you didn't hire him, who did?
*twilight zone music plays*
*~* somewhere else *~*
KUWABARA: I wonder how Hiei is dealing with that narrator I hired?