Stuart had lost all sign of the others. When the big flash came up, he only heard Sonic's order to "RUN FOR IT!" and he took that as the cue to move. They were no doubt scattered around the mall. As for himself, he had bee-lined for the main exits, only to run into two very curious E-12 Sentinels who seemed very eager to grab the little toy man and see how long he would stay in one piece. The teacher had made a hasty retreat back inside. Trapped. The terrorist had obviously blockaded all the conventional exits.
The lanky man felt his courage melting; he could hear the five super-machines stomping down the corridors, coming after him. It was a hunt now, and he was the rat stuck in the maze.
"Well, since I've lost the three Mouseketeers," he told himself, still light-years from the wit of Sonic or Beta, "I'll have to call in a few good friends." He raised his wristwatch to his mouth and pressed a button.
"Little Bear to Mama Bear: come in Mama Bear!" He stopped to keep his echoing footsteps from garbling the transmission.
"Send in the Beetle Tanks!"
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
"What's the point," Zeta huffed as the squad jogged out of the plaza. "We don't even know where they went!"
Beta swivelled his yellow-capped head at his troops. "Then we go find them, cry baby!" he sneered while running. "If it's the last thing I do, I'll get those darn jerks!"
Only Dr. Robotnik would have created mechas with the ability to gasp. "Sir!" Gamma protested. "This a G-Rated program! Forgive my breach of command, but please watch your language!"
"Shut up, Gamma you loser!" Beta jeered, causing the red soldier to cover his virgin audio sensors. He stopped the march at a fork in the multi-level hallways. "It's really simple: we split up! Tex – take Sad-Sack and go thataway!"
"Ah gat it boss! We'll get them varmints!" Epsilon and Zeta jogged down one hallway.
"G-man, you come with me and we'll cover the second floor!"
"Understood commander."
Beta paused and hummed theatrically. "Now, lemmie see, is anyone left? Oh!" He clasped his arm cannons to his cheeks, feigning surprise. "Delta! Oh no, that means you'll have to go alone! Gee, I'm sorry, loner; I had no idea! It was never my intention to leave you by yourself, loner. Are you okay 'bout that, loner?"
The blue thespian just reloaded his firearm and whispered in sinister tones. "My ears hearken to the buzzing of insects, but the white noise cannot bleed a heart already so charred to black."
Gamma's militant posture slouched as his brother spoke these words, and his core temperature dropped considerably. He watched Delta stomp down a dark corridor, cradling his gun arm and fading into the shadows. Some strange sensation was creeping through 102's armour, a chilling spidery click of frost.
His sibling merged into the darkness, a lost soul dead to emotion, that grim phantasm marching wearily to a destiny of solitude. Gamma – the chill crept up once more – he … he felt for Delta … he felt that things should not be so…
"LOOONNER!" Beta called, interrupting his thoughts. "NOO-BODY LIKES YOU! NOO-BODY LIKES YOU!"
There was a crash of glass and the din of hoverjets. "Coming from the plaza," Gamma noted with a hint of worry.
A transmission crackled over the communication lines. Master was panting heavily. "Beta, change of plans: get back here immediately!"
Gamma was already jogging for the plaza.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
With vertical thrusters sweeping rain across the floor, G.U.N.'s Beetle Tank was an impressive sight. The bronze, shovel-horned artillery had descended through the shattered skylights and was now converting to land-mode for easier mobility. It sunk to the ground with a heavy lurch and began the counter-strike.
A scan of the plaza and the tank's operator picked up several robotics and one human. Identification was confirmed: it was the Eggman. The stag beetle rotated and its trident horn lowered; the primary cannon was exposed. Far off in a mobile command-centre, the pilot targeted the bloated terrorist and smiled as the crosshairs went red.
He fired.
The visual feed jostled and a streak of hot laser made a clean miss, burning a hole through the soundstage and not the doctor.
"Wha' the?"
Back in the plaza, Gamma aimed another laser bolt at the aft of the giant tank, shaking its bronze frame. The gunner mech clutched his firing arm and made a steady march for the enemy.
"Fear not, my Lord!" he called to the rattled soundstage. "I will save you!"
The tank had picked up the enemy and was already rotating to meet the challenge. Gamma spared no efficiency, and fired away at the hull and minor sensor arrays while the tank levelled its cannon for another shot. He had to keep it distracted from the stage.
"Ha HA!" his master crowed from the stage. "Destroy it, Gamma; blow it to pieces!"
Once more, the Beetle Tank lowered its horn, and Gamma had to step away to avoid the collapsing drawbridge. He identified the exposed cannon lens, assessed the vulnerability it presented, and lowered his scope to target the weak-spot.
White laser lanced from the tank and hit E-102 dead center in the chassis. Gamma flew through the air and skidded across the floor, smoking.
The Little Black Thing gave a gasp. "WHOA!" Decoe fretted and covered his optics. "Oh my!" the squeamish assistant yelped while turning away from the twitching, sparking corpse. Robotnik screamed like a child whose meticulously constructed, five-story Lego castle had been toppled.
"GAMMA!"
Beta plodded into the arena rather casually and did a double take at the cadaver. "Oooh," he winced. "I'm late, aren't I?"
"One down," grinned the G.U.N. robotics-operator. He moved to target the black bogey.
His co-pilot gave a cry and pointed to the visual monitor. "Holy Heck! It's getting' back up!"
E-102 Gamma swivelled into a sitting position and a push got him onto his feet. Besides the black dirt over his armour, he was in the perfect state of health. The beetle was puttering away, its idle frame mirroring the stunned countenance of its faraway pilots. He lowered his targeting scope and swept over the unguarded cannon.
"Impostor! Know that there is only one Master of Mechanoids! The Almighty Dr. Robotnik, Greatest Mind known to your world!"
"Suck-up," Beta muttered.
"And you, you debauchery of His creations, you evil impostor … your time has come."
Gamma fired and shattered the lens. The hull of the Beetle Tank shook. Panels popped open and electricity crackled free. The enormous insect lurched forward in a last stand – it would run them down as its final act – but pops and snaps and twangs flew from its treads until it could move only to shake and rattle and smoke. The enormous insect gave a low whine and shuddered to a halt.
Gamma let the smoke waft from his gun as he stood over his kill with solemn alert. Beta's motors buzzed as he looked from the kill to the killer.
"THAT'S IT????" he blurted with indignation. "No white light bursting out, no fiery explosions, no disintegrating under a bubble of energy!!!??? I want my money back!!!!"
"The evildoer has been vanquished," Gamma returned.
Beta flailed his cannons and protested in fits. "B-dj … B… Ife…. What is wrong with you man??? You just can't go around shooting guns, blasting away and destroying robots without an explosion! … You … you just don't! Whose gonna clean up the carcass now? Huh? Huh? Cause if you think you can just leave this for me to delegate to Zeta, then you're sadly mistaken. You're sadly mistaken."
A whisper picked up by their audio sensors made the mechs stop. "I don't believe it," hissed the high voice. "He destroyed the tank with one shot. Wow."
Beta was first to triangulate the source; his head swivelled up to the second-story balcony and his optics zoomed in. "HEY, HEY HEY!" The hedgehog girl yelped and looked right at him.
"Ah, my adoring fan-girl. Can't resist seeing me in action, takin' out the military's finest."
"Commander, didn't I …"
"Shaddup Gamma!" Back to Amy. "How's it goin', Pixel-pie?" Beta crooned. "Like the show? I betcha want an autograph, don't' ya, Cutesy Buttons?"
The girl bolted.
"WHAT? HEY, WAIT! No, no … uh… I LIKE TO CUDDLE AND TALK ABOUT MY FEELINGS! … Hello?"
"She is gone," Gamma observed.
His commander was right in his face. "Well thank you, Mr. Ee-Wun Oh-That's Obvious!!!" Beta turned away to scan Amy's line of flight.
"Well, it doesn't matter. She aught a know she can't escape my love. BETA: AFTERBURN!"
The black mech transformed into helicopter-mode and flared up to the second story, leaving Gamma to pick up the rear.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
From the shaky soundstage, Robotnik cheered on their pursuit! "Ha! Did you see that?" He pointed at the ruined tank. "Sonic can't stop them; not even the mighty G.U.N. can defeat my E-100 series! Nothing can destroy a regular cast member!"
"…Yeah," the Dark Jetpack Maniac agreed absentmindedly. While he zoomed around the wobbly-stage-lights, a thought popped up. He jetted down to the corner where Decoe was fiddling with Bocoe's parts and landed on a black amp to consult. "Hey, you heard all that stuff about bein' invincible, right?"
"Correct," Decoe commented without looking away from his work. The ebony-plated-envoy grinned, knowing he was never stuck in such menial labour. To rub in his casual life, he stretched and leaned back against a dome atop the amp.
"So, does that mean that if somethin' super-super bad happens to me, then I'll be totally okay?"
"Right about now," said a peeved voice from behind the little black thing, "I'd really like to test that theory out." The messenger puzzled and looked around, one hand over his eyes, the other resting on the dome. There was an indignant a-hem, which attracted his gaze downwards.
"GLAH!" Two very annoyed eyes. On a gray face. Underneath the messenger's hand. Bocoe's head continued to glare. LBT freaked, as though he had touched a corpse, and stepped away.
"Oh, don't go away." The metal head hopped forward. "I don't mind being used as a lawn chair. Please, go right ahead and SIT ON MY FACE!"
The messanjah-robo kept backing away, his eyes warbling. Bocoe kept bouncing forward on his neck. "C'mon, go ahead, do it again! I like being abused!" LBT gave a courageous snivel and wrung his hands.
"Whazamater? You gonna cry? Huh? Huh? Gonna cry, cry-baby?"
The floodgates burst. "M-WHAAAAAAAAAAA-HAA-HUU!!!!!!!"
Decoe tried decreasing the volume on his audio, but he just couldn't tune out the two idiots. He growled – as if his work wasn't aggravating enough! Once again, he tried mashing Bocoe's wrist and hand together, but they just wouldn't fit! He clanged them together: clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk, clunk – willing them to connect, but still nothing. Decoe gave a sigh and reached for the stapler. Again.
Bocoe's head was growing increasingly nasty. "Cry-baby," he sneered. "That's what I thought: yer just a wimpy ol …" he stopped. "Uh … kid, maybe you wanna stop crying now…" The amp was becoming increasingly wet.
"Err, uhh … My uh – my wiring's exposed. I can't get wet! Kid? Kid? ……… Decoe, you wanna help here? Decoe? Decoe? DEC-AGHHHHH!!!!!!!"
There. Decoe wiped the oil off his brow and stepped back to admire his work. A perfect reconstruction – You couldn't even see the crazy glue, and the duct tape blended perfectly. It wasn't just good – it was good enough! Now all that remained was to re-attach Bocoe's head.
So Decoe turned around to do so and saw the sobbing little black thing and the charred cranium sitting in an ooze of electrified tears.
Decoe gave a very tired look back at the headless henchman he had so painstakingly restored. His processors could not find a suitable G-rated swear, so he settled for giving his creation an angry kick. It collapsed instantly. He crossed his arms, plopped down and sulked.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Deep in the shadows of the mall, Sonic the Hedgehog collapsed. He couldn't continue. The fight had drained him of all his energy – he was a dizzy, disoriented target for whichever mech found him first.
Still, he tried; he dragged his body across the ground. Maybe he could distract the troops while the others escaped. Maybe … maybe.
He couldn't move anymore. He wanted to – wanted to will his body forward, but he could not. His crawling had taken him directly into the waiting feet of a looming shadow.
The hedgehog reached his neck back, wondering which robot would have the luck of terminating him, but the motion was too much. Sonic dropped to the floor and fainted.
The shadow did not move, only looked at the fallen animal. A hand reached down …
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Stuart was in a fit of panic. HQ had lost transmissions from the tanks; he had lost his way in the myriad pathways and there were two mechas stomping dangerously close. He ducked underneath a bench and prayed the darkness was enough to hid him.
Voices now approached. "Ah betcha there's wun of them nasty critters daywn here. Whoo-wee, we're gonna get that varmint!"
"Hurray," muttered a deflated voice. "I'm tiii-red. Can't we just go recharge? We're never gonna find them."
"There wus footsteps up here, ah heard 'em. They can't hide frum us!"
Stuart held his breath.
"This sucks!" came the second voice.
The heavy footsteps stopped. "Partner, ah gatta ask, wuts with yew and all this belly-achin an' mopin? What'cha gat tu be upset about?"
An outraged squeal of gears. "Oh yeah right; like you can't tell!"
"Whoa, wun questiun an' already yer blowin' lake an ol' Texas oil-pipe! Ahm just askin'."
"Look at me. Don't you see something wrong with me?"
"Err, ain't we identical?"
"I'M PINK!"
The cowboy mecha let out a knowing ahhh. "Uhh… well … pink's a nice culur," he suggested.
"Yeah, if you like frilly dresses and ribbons and wanna play tea-party with your dollies!"
"Uh, yeah." Stuart could hear some awkward shuffling. "Well… yer nat exactly pink … naw, yer – yer more uf … a really, really light purple."
"PURPLE? Like that big, dancing monster on kids TV? Is that what I look like to you?"
"Well, err, ahh…"
"You're not helping."
"Uhh, burgundy?"
"What kind of colour is burgundy?"
"Well, it's kand-uf a reddish-purpl… aww shoot."
Stuart could hardly contain his sniggering. He slapped a palm over his mouth.
"Just … just go away."
"Aww, c'mon, ah didn't mean it ……… Wait. Wait. What wus that?"
"What was what?"
"Ah heard somethin'."
Stuart's desire to laugh drained down his chest, leaving a cold pit in his stomach.
"One of the mammals?"
Epsilon motioned for silence. "There! Ah just gat another spike on mah Dramatic Tension Meter." He looked around menacingly. "… Someone's here…"
His pursuers moved in slow, clomping footsteps, testing the area for signs of heightened fear and anxiety. Stuart went pale.
"There! It just kicked up again. We're hot, partner – this snake's close."
Flood lamps ignited. Stuart could feel the heat from the yellow lights sweep across the floor, searching for him. He shivered and curled his body tight. The cowboy chuckled. "Ahm gettin' warmer."
Stuart tensed his body and he pressed himself into the ground, as though he could melt into the cracks. But they did not leave. Four green eyes moved cautiously through the dark. Their headlamps swung across the air like laser scopes, and the eyes followed the light that exposed everything. They were closer.
"This baby's firin' up in red levels," declared the one with an orange tinge. "Ooh, not long naw."
The spy couldn't understand – he tried to be as quiet as a mouse and as attentive as a hawk, but every nervous motion he made, every shiver or tremble or pant or quiver that ran through his body seemed to draw the mechas closer. And the closer they came, the more he shook and sweat and panicked and that drew them even nearer!
A foot fell before the bench, inches from the hiding Stuart. He shoved his fist in his mouth, to keep from screaming. It needed only twist a little and it would brush his shoulder.
The foot lifted. It walked away.
Stuart released his hand and allowed himself a sigh.
"It's dippin'… but it was strong over … There."
His pupils shrunk into inky dots. A light. A light was shining on his eye. On his face. Exposing him. They could see. They could see. They could see him!!!
Not yet. The robot was sweeping its head around, inspecting the walls. But soon it would come and rest its green glare on him. He had to get away. He had to get away. The spy rolled on his back. He began slithering out.
His jacket went taut. It was caught! Caught on a bolt in the floor! He was pinned! Stuart glanced to the robot. Ninety-degrees and it would find him, naked in the light. He reached his hand; he started pulling. Had to get free, had to get free.
Forty-five degrees. It was stuck, and he was too awkwardly trapped to get his hands to the spot! Twenty degrees, and all the time the mech was muttering.
"It's almost off the scale … yeah, I've gat 'im. I've gat 'im." Its gun charged up in preparation; the barrel was already pointing at the bench. All it would have to do was fire.
Stuart was sweating, for all the help it did. He was trapped, pinned and he wanted to cry out, he was so claustrophobic. Still, he couldn't reach. Couldn't get free.
Fifteen degrees. Ten. Five. Three.
A black shadow intercepted the light. "I'm booored."
The orange mech screamed as though he'd sat on a pitchfork. "GAHH!! Yew cotton-pickin' varmint! Yew mutton-headed pinko!!"
The other mech moaned like a child on a hot and boring car ride. "Whaaaaaat?"
"Idjit! YEW JUS' KILLED THE TENSION! Mah meter reset! How'ma supposed tu fand that mammal naw?"
"Stop yellllling. Everybody's yelling at me. C'mon, there's no one here and I'm tiiiired."
While the other mech muttered some choice words, Stuart tore his jacket free and crawled across the hallway until he was hiding behind one of the pillars supporting the second floor. "All right, all right; we'll go. Git a move on, Mr. Pink!"
"I thought I was burgundy," Zeta moped.
"What kand uf culur is burgundy? MOVE, before ah string yew up by yer sissy little pink gizzard!" His partner just moaned pathetically. "Ahhwwwwww…."
With his back against the post, Stuart listened to the disgruntled mech and his new convert stomp off, faster and louder than ever. He finally peeked around his hiding spot. Not a soul. Stuart dropped his head back and gave the world's greatest and most relieved sigh.
"Phew."
A metal claw grabbed him by the shirt. "WHAAAA!!"
E-103 Delta lifted his quarry into the air and slammed it against the post. "The angel of death is upon you, Stuart."
The teacher felt the wind rush past and then a tremendous CRASH as his body slammed into the bench. He moaned among the shattered wood.
His eyes went wide. A gun barrel was in his face.
There was more: maniacal laughing. Delta's headlamp swirled with green mist and demonstrated its holographic capabilities by projecting Dr. Robotnik's looming face above the fallen teacher.
Stuart paled. "Please, let me go!" he begged. "I'm just a school teacher; I'm innocent!" The grovelling only made the doctor explode with deep laughter. Delta stood militant, his gun arm wavering not the least.
"A teacher, eh?" Robotnik sneered. "Quite a complicated wrist-watch you have for a public school salary, isn't it? Oh, it's no use hiding the gadget; I've seen enough, yess. Now I know who you are: you're that government spy, Stuart the Human!"
Stuart froze. Caught. But one look in that gun barrel told him he had to buy time. "I see you've done your homework," he said shakily. He stuttered on. "I could call that an invasion of privacy."
The terrorist laughed all the more. "I could say the same thing about you!"
Had to barter; had to keep bargaining. "Well," he conceded, "I had done my job, so I thought it was time to collect what's mine and leave." He protectively covered his watch and the microfilm of Sonic's battle.
Robotnik snorted. Holographic spit flew from the display. "You are one pathetic creature!"
Stuart was growing bold with time. His hand was inching towards a beam with twisted nails… "And what about you?" he countered. With his watch hand he pulled some news clipping from his breast pocket. The doctor frowned as the papers were raised for inspection.
"These are the results for a global science award presented to The World's Greatest Scientific Genius," Stuart declared. He would show this egomaniac just how low he was!
"But if the man here is the planet's top brain…" Grandpa Chuck's face was plastered on the newspaper, "Then who … or what is being projected in front of me?"
The bald face scowled even more. "Delta, finish it." The hologram winked out.
Only one chance. Stuart gripped his wooden club and lashed out! Delta took the slap on the wrist without a wink. "My soul is far too numb for pain." The mecha's grasping hand grabbed the stick and snapped it in two.
Stuart's body seized up, as if it were his body being broken in half. He had to move, he had to back away; he had to run! But the gun in his face could be used to destroy and to sedate: one look in that long, black barrel, and Stuart could not move. His eyes widened.
The mecha leaned over its torso, perhaps for better accuracy, perhaps because this was its one pleasure. The unflinching green eyes stared him down, and, though they had no muscles to move with, in the shadows that played upon the machine's face, Stuart saw a malicious grin.
A meek little gurgle escaped Stuart's lips as the laser-arm was prodded closer into his face. One kill-command, and his nose would be shaved clean off. His eyes trembled.
Delta crouched over its prey, and leaned its gun in closer. From the skylights above, clear moonlight hit his optics and the reflection gave him a look of malice, of spite and of delight. This would be enjoyed. He leaned in and his sadistic scowl grew.
Stuart gasped; the gun was so very dangerously close! He couldn't get away; there was nowhere to run! And all the while, the mecha stared at him – gleefully, judging by the light on its soulless face. His pupils shrank back.
Delta inched forward, hunching over his quarry like Death himself. The shadows stretched and his malicious countenance grew.
Stuart whimpered and his eyelids opened wide with horror.
Delta leaned forward and his evil delight grew.
Stuart shivered and his eyes popped open.
Delta crouched lower.
Stuart's eyes stretched wider.
Delta's arm pushed closer
Stuart's eyes bugged out further.
"WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!!!???" Stuart blurted, once more, echoing a response that was more than his own.
The blue mecha straightened up, and pondered. His posture took a frown. "I can not destroy you yet, creature of flesh. The moment is not yet perfect… I must await …"
The answer took some time, during which the artistic robot waved his hands about – as though the idea could be pulled out of the breeze conjured by his arms. "I must await …… Something…"
Then there was a great, teeth-gnashing squeal. The sound was so horrible that Stuart flinched, though Delta showed no notice. The outside disturbance was enough to make a slight break in Stuart's paralysis – just enough for him to tilt his neck, look behind his captor and see what was the commotion.
The second-story balcony – there was the origin! A huge, spherical shadow was being pushed to the guard railing, and now it was being hoisted over the fencing and it was scraping off a sound worse than nails on a chalkboard! The enormous object cast its eclipse over Stuart and the robot. The spy gave a meek whimper. Delta finally noticed the disturbance, and rotated his head to stare with hypnotic attention.
As the shadow began to emit a whistle of growing volume and decreasing tone, Stuart meekly crab-walked out of range. Delta just looked up in a state of nihilistic resignation at his Something, and gave a deep sigh, slight disappointment.
"Ah, comes the dawn…"
And then the boulder fell and crushed him.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Sonic felt cool moisture on his forehead. He felt it contain the throbbing of his headache, which was very nice. He also felt another strange sensation – a wet, tickling touch on his face that made him want to giggle. He could feel the flicker of a tongue across his cheeks. Who was this mysterious source of pleasure, he wondered. With a content smile on his face he opened his eyes very lazily. "Hey girl, what's your na…"
Sonic took in his playmate and his eyes popped open with a distinct 'boing'.
Cheese looked down at Sonic, smiled, and gave the hedgehog's nose another lick.
"Chao?"
"GAHHH!!! GETITOFF GETITOFF GETITOFF!!!!!!!"
"Mr. Sonic-san, you're awake! … Here boy, c'mon Cheese!" The chao gave a loyal coo and scampered off to the heels of his mistress. Sonic bolted to a sitting position and worked furiously to peel away his topmost layer of skin. Ewwww…
"Cream?" the hedgehog exclaimed. The rabbit was coming towards him, dragging Sensei Stuart's disoriented body over her shoulder. "What'ya doing here, Cream? I thought Ella put you to bed!"
Cottontail gave a final tug and had to concede to gravity. She dumped the teacher on the floor and hopped over to check on Sonic. "Are you okay, Mr. Sonic-san?" she asked, checking the moist towel on his forehead. "You looked really, really hurt when I found yah."
Sonic sidestepped the question. "Cream! I don't know how you followed me here, but you've gotta get out! Eggman just sent out five super mechas and they're gonna destroy you if they catch you!"
"Nuh-uh!" Cream protested. "There's only four!" Sonic gave her a funny look, so Cream explained by taking his hand and bringing the hedgehog to the guardrail. Down below was a near-spherical boulder, taller than three furries standing on each other's shoulders. The arms and legs of E-103 Delta lay spread-eagle from under the corners of the massive rock. Sonic looked to the rabbit. "Did you do all that?"
"Yup-er-oonie" Cream confirmed, delighted at her recognition.
Sonic blinked and shook his head. All the sudden nonsense made that throbbing return to his temple – this wasn't right. Clutching his forehead, he hissed, "How did you drag a humongous, twelve-foot tall boulder onto the second floor of a shopping mall?"
"Oh," she was obviously very proud of herself. "I asked Cheese to do it."
"... and Cheese carried a rock three million times his body weight?"
"All by himself!" Cream declared.
Sonic felt his face aging again. "And did Cheese help you get inside too?"
"Yup, yup, yup!" she beamed. "There were these big scary robots outside and they wudn't let us in, so I told Cheese ta get 'um and he did!"
"What did he do?"
"He smashed them!" She was bouncing on her feet by this point.
"...... a chao ... smashed an E-12? All on his own???"
"Well..." Cream hesitated, "I sorta did help him a little. I kinda threw him at them really, really hard."
"You threw your..."
"He likes it!" Cream protested. "He dusnt' mind, do ya, huh boy?"
"Chao!" the little blue globule scooted to his feet and demonstrated his enthusiasm by charging Sonic's leg and repeatedly knocking his head into the hedgehog's shin. A hollow thunk, thunk, thunk resounded.
Sonic gave a very disturbed look at the chao, then at its owner. "... Cream, when Cheese was just a little baby chao, did you ever drop him?"
"Once," she confessed innocently. "One time Cheese swallowed a toy an' I wus shaking him so it'ud come out and then ... Cheese had an' Oopsie."
"… I see..."
Stuart was coming to his senses once more. "Oh… what's going on?"
Cream answered swiftly. "There's wun, too, three, four – four more – super robots in'tha mall, an we gatta stop them all!"
Sonic gave her a sweet smile. "That's some good counting there, Creamy, but uh… I think we need to find you and Stu a hiding spot before I go try and stop these super soldiers."
"How did she get here?" Stuart asked.
"My frien's told me you guys were gonna be in trouble!" Cream explained. "They told me you were gonna go to the mall, so I took Cheese an' we came ta help!"
"Friends?" Stuart puzzled.
"Friends," Sonic answered back with quotation fingers. He leaned towards the human and whispered, "She's got invisible gnomes living in the walls."
Cream pouted. "They are not invisdible, Mr. Sonic-san! You just can' see 'um! I found 'um one day: I wen' inta a new room in Chriseses house, an I started watchin' TV, but really, I was watchin' my friends!"
"I remember," Sonic nodded politely. To Stuart, "I caught her talking to a window that day. She thought there was someone outside watching her."
"They're watchin' you too, Mr. Sonic-san!" Cream protested. "An they are too real; I talk tuh them an' they talk tuh me, an they talk tuh you too!" The rabbit glanced to the skylights; Sonic followed her gaze – just rain clouds, but he thought there might have been a silvery flash, like the reflection of light off some giant screen suspended in the sky…
God, I hate these explanation parts, an invisible voice groaned, they take so long and everyone's so stupid!
Sonic flinched. He looked around, and so did Stuart.
Cream went on. "They told me where ta find you, an' where ta find the rock! They wanna help, Mr. Sonic-san, an I wanna help you too!"
"Chao, chao!"
Sonic gave a heavy sigh. "All right, all right. Okay Cream, if your friends," he switched to a spooky voice, "seeee all and heeeaar all, then how do we beat the E-100s?"
"They're invincible," Stuart added.
Cream giggled. "Aww, that's easy! Once ya know howta beat Reappearing Henchmen, they're no biggie."
"Reappearing Henchmen?"
"Y'can't destroy 'um," Cream explained knowingly, "but'cha can do lotsa bad stuff tuh disable' em. Y'can push 'em offa cliff, or run 'em over. The bestest way tuh stop 'um is with a rock or somethin' big!"
Sonic and Stuart glanced over the railing and the two-dimensional Delta. "Sonic," Stuart muttered, "The mall has a radio station on the third floor. They transmit using an antenna tower from the roof…"
The hedgehog boarded the same train of thought and smiled. "I can lure them up there, if you can get that tower loose or something."
Cream interrupted. "Wait, hang on…" Her ears stiffened and she nodded her head to silent instructions. "Okay, gotcha! Mr. Teacher Sir, my friends say they saw a party store on this floor. They say they'll have lotsa firecrackers an' stuff. We can use those ta blow off the tower."
Stuart clapped his hands. "Brilliant! Sonic, if you can keep the robots busy awhile…"
The blue blur grinned. "They won't get me a second time, not once I start a chase. Ten minutes enough time?"
"We'll make it enough time. Get to it!"
Sonic grinned. "See ya on the roof." He zipped off.
The rabbit and her pet were already scampering off to the Fireworks Fun House – Stuart recalled the outlet from his youth. He smiled and watched her go, then leaned into his watch.
"Agent Mean ol' Mr. Mustard reporting: interesting development here, and I need to request additional surveillance on the house from now on. Apparently, the rabbit has learned the technique of Fourth-Walling…"
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
"LAAAADIES AAAAAND GENTLEMEN! BOYS AAAAND GIRLS! MECHAS OF ALL AGES! IT'S TIME TO PLAY HEDGEHOG HAMMER!"
E-101 Beta waited for the applause-track to play over his vox. He tapped an arm-cannon to his pseudo-chin in an expression of deep thought.
"AND JUST HOW DO YOU PLAY?" he asked. "IT'S QUITE SIMPLE: HAMMER THE HEDGEHOG!"
His cannons switched to rapid fire. Amy screeched and dived out of the bullet trail. She tumbled across the tiles. Hovering in helicopter-mode, Beta gave a jolly laugh. "HO HO! What can I say? Girls always fall for a guy like me! WHA HA!"
Panting, Amy got to her knees and tried to crawl away. A metal foot slammed down before her path. She looked up at the red robot, dread taking its hold.
"OOOH, you're gonna be sorry for standing me up, my little Digital Dream-Girl! Gamma there, he's a real lady-killer! WHOA HO!"
"Sir, that is quite uncalled for! Where is your honour?"
"Recycling Bin, I think …"
A third voice came with the whirl of a propeller. "S'cuse me! Comin' Thru!" Tails dived between the mechas and seized Amy by the wrist. Gamma and Beta turned their heads and followed the escaping fox.
"HE CAN FLY?" Beta gaped. "WHAT'S HIS NAME? MARY-SUE?"
Gamma was already charging after, gun-hand ablaze. The Ground Commander saw it was time to make chase. "Gigabyte Girl, one way or another, I'm gonna getcha! MAX THRUST!"
Amy's sudden rescue left her too stunned for words, but she screamed plenty as Tails took her on a rapid air chase through the mall. Laser beams streaked the air around them and only some expert bobbing and weaving through the air kept Tails from being fried. The fox made quick glances back at his pursuers, hardly sparing any time for the path ahead.
"TAILS, WATCH OUT!"
Amy forced his eyes forward: a water fountain – the kind that fired jets in intervals and could spray so high as the third floor. Tails yelped and pointed his nose skyward, heading vertical with a geyser he just barely missed. Gamma watched their progress and fired a missile ahead, into their path.
Tails saw the energy sphere, and made with the horizontal, only to knock himself silly into the rising column of water. Amy screeched. Water in his eyes; in his tails; weighing his fur down. Tails began to weave drunkenly through the air, making a tailspin to the second floor. He and Amy crashed and rolled across the ground.
"BOO-YAH! LET'S FINISH 'EM OFF, G-MAN!"
One floor above, Amy was pulling a waterlogged fox to his feet. "Tails…" she gasped, "You saved me…"
The fox accepted her hand up, and blushed modestly. "It… it was nothing," he panted over the pain in his limbs. Wait a second… "I saved your life?" he gaped.
"You sure did," the girl said with a warm smile. Even though she was soaked and her hair hung damp, her smile made her seem just lovely. "That was … pretty brave," she blushed.
Tails was back on his feet, but she had not let go of his hand. They stood together, wet and panting out their hot breath, not quite sure what to do besides look at each other. "Your… your eyes," Amy started, "They're really blue." Her rose face went red. "Sorry, I sound stupid… I just – I just never noticed. … They're nice."
Tails was finding it hard to do anything but breathe and return the squeeze of her hand. "Thanks," he said, feeling no less awkward. "I … I like your dress."
Amy gave a pleasant gasp. "You noticed!" she beamed, pulling her hand away to take her skirt and pose in a curtsey. "It's a new one – I just got it. … No one noticed… oh Tails, you're so sweet."
"Umm… umm…"
"Here, your bangs are getting in your eyes." She raised her hand. "Let me… Whoa, I won't bite!" Tails had flinched at the new immediacy of her touch. "Here, let me…"
Words failed. Amy took her hand and her fingers trembled up the fox's cheek. She didn't know why she was so nervous, or why it took such daring to raise her touch to his forehead and smooth back his hair. She only knew that she could not take her hand away – it ran across his head and past his ear. Tails drew a sharp breath – and suddenly Amy was cupping his head in her palm, bringing it close to her own. She could see her own eyes tremble in the newly discovered sapphires of this brave little fox. Tails leaned his face closer.
"Ewwww! Tails, your breath stinks!"
The little fox suddenly had very tiny pupils. His mouth – hovering in an O-shape just a second ago – flattened out and zipped back behind his nose. He looked as though some cataclysmic catastrophe had just occurred. "My… my … my …"
"It's so gross," Amy illustrated. "Did you have tuna fish? I hate tuna fish; it's all … icky and stuff. Plus they make it from all those poor baby dolphins!" She thought for a moment and gasped. "You don't eat dolphins, do you Miles Prower?" Her eyes were glassy orbs ready to shatter.
"I…I… I… I…"
"He'll be eating lead. Is that close enough?"
Tails and Amy turned and gave an exaggerated gasp. "OHH!" Beta had an arm cannon in each of their faces. Gamma flanked. The two youngsters backed away, slowly – eyes mesmerized by the weapons at point-blank range.
Gamma was swift to give orders. "It is unnecessary to engage combat. Surrender quietly and your lives will be spared for brutal, hourly torture."
Tails looked to Amy. "Amy? If uh, you have any uh, deep, emotional secrets you were uh, always too afraid to reveal, now might be good time to get them off your chest."
"You're first, fox boy." Beta fired.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
"Are we there yet?"
"Naw."
"Are we there yet?"
"Naw."
"… Now are we there yet?"
Epsilon spun around and fired his gun into the ceiling. "Ah keep tellyn' yah, NAW! Shaddup an' start scannin' fer hedgehawgs!"
Organics Detected. That was his internal computer, and it pointed right behind…
Epsilon spun and whipped out his pistol arm. The hedgehog dodged left and right and kept motoring forward, delivering a leaping kick at the mech's torso. Epsilon crumbled into Zeta.
"Yee-haw!" Sonic whooped. "Time to wrangle up the cattle!" And he tore around the robots with a fire-hose in tow. Soon they were wrapped tighter than tiny Tommy tying trying tongue twisters
The hedgehog snapped to a halt and grinned over his catch. "Here's some noose for yah, my bound-up buddies: you're at the end of your rope! Well, I can see you're both wrapped up at the moment, so I'll just mosey on off, reel slow."
"No fair!" Zeta whined. E-104 grunted and struggled. "Yew shure do talk fast, partner," he spit. With a grunt, the orange mecha snapped his bonds and stood up.
"But let's see haw ya dance."
Lasers fired into the floor and Sonic made his feet jump as lighting. Epsilon snarled and lunged, whipping the hedgehog with his hand. "Time te kick yer kiester, bluebell!"
They struggled and fought and finally Sonic pushed away, only to dodge more blows from Zeta. "Before that rope stunt, I was whiny-child disgruntled," E-105 snapped. "But now you've pushed me – I'm going to full-out mailman mode!"
Sonic went skidding across the floor, with not even two minutes under his belt. This is gonna be a looonng distraction, he sighed. Then he got to his feet and dashed away.
"Now what in 'tarnation are yew waitin' fer?" Epsilon raged. He slapped his partner upside the head. "Dawn't just watch 'im – GET 'IM!"
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
With a punch of air and a flash, the missile launched from its torpedo tube, spinning towards the gaping fox. Death seemed to heighten his senses – he could see the grinning Eggman logo stamped on the nosecone, laughing at him with every rotation. He could see the Made in Taiwan copyright engraved down the smart bomb's side. And his eyes opened up more and more until he could see his entire life!
Here Sonic, catch this power ring!
Don't worry, Sonic. I'll fly you there in the X-Tornado!
Head lice?
Sonic! Grab this power ring!
How high should I jump, Sonic?
Sonic an' A-my sittin' in a tree…
But how did you know it was a fake emerald?
Hang on, Sonic! I've got a power ring!
"You're first, fox boy."
With a punch of air and a flash, the missile launched from its torpedo tube…
"What … oh no, I'm back…"
The missile never actually hit him. There was still about a meter's distance from his body when it detonated and let loose a fireball. But the shrapnel never hit him. The flame supernova expanded though, and fiery horses charged forward, but that never even singed him. A slower ring of sound waves shrieked out, but – c'mon – unless it's coming from Ella's mouth, sound isn't likely to hurt.
So Tails survived being bludgeoned by shrapnel, burned by flames and deafened by noise. It was rather the force projected by the distant explosion that knocked him in the chest and sent him flying through the air…
And into a toy store, where he crumpled against a display of colourful beach balls. The stack of spheres collapsed and buried the fox in a non-lethal grip of paralysis.
Amy screamed. "TAILS!"
"We never actually hit them, do we?" Gamma checked.
"Let's test that out." Beta clicked his arms at the panicking hedgehog. Amy paled and started backing off.
Casanova Beta stepped after her, laughing. "Sorry, my little Software Sweetie, but I've got orders. Maybe someday I'll write a story about our tragic love and post it on the Internet…"
Amy inched into the toy store, looking around for some sort of weapon. Her eyes flashed – squirt guns on sale – 20% off! Amy snatched the display model and thrust the water pistol at the mechas.
"Stay away!" she trembled. "I'm warning you."
Beta exploded. "HA! A water gun?" He shoved his face down and sneered. "Does my little Netscape Nymph think she can short us out with that ittie-bittie plastic shooter?" The hedgehog cowered and shut her eyes. "We're water-proof, little missy! Whatcha gonna do 'bout that?"
The ground commander scared a blind shot out of Amy. A hot beam of red energy sizzled out the pistol and scorched through a light fixture. The light smashed on Gamma's helmet.
"Huh?" Beta spun around and looked at his brother – unharmed, but equally confused. The black E-series gave a worried little tick.
"… that … wasn't water…"
Amy didn't understand this any further, but she knew she had defence. She took a confident pose and aimed at the red robot. Heat beams lanced out of the gun barrel and sent Gamma flying through the air. E-102 clanged into the second-story railing with a smoky hole through his chest. Beta followed this with a stupefied look.
"But-but-but… BUT THAT KIND OF GUN ISN'T SUPPOSED TO SHOOT LASERS!" he shouted on behalf of the masses.
Amy fired, and chewed off his shoulder joint. She fired again and blew away his right cannon.
"GAHH! That was my writing hand, you crazy psycho!"
She fired and laser beams rammed dead center in the chest. Beta accelerated out of the store and collided into Gamma with enough force to slam through the balcony railing. The mechas screamed and flailed their limb and Amy rushed over just in time to catch their final moment before they shrank away and plunged into the abyss.
Gamma fell into the water fountain. Beta landed face-first on the ground.
But the pain was not yet over for the E-Series: Gamma' foot had landed on the fountain rim and split through the concrete like an axe on wood. Water dripped and the crack began to spread…
The waters broke through their barrier, slopping and spilling to the tiled floor and forging a path down the hallway. A current was building and it began to push the cherry-red robot downstream. Gamma panicked, but he was fixed to his back! "no… No… NOO!" he protested as the miniature raging river swallowed him whole and carried him out of the plaza and out of the concern of Team Good Guys and anyone else who might be observing the scene.
Beta, meanwhile, was hauling his banged-up chassis off the floor when something terrible caught his eye: his earlier shooting had shattered the glass windows of many shops, including the bicycle outlet before his smashed body. And the vibrations from his fall had wobbled one sleek, black mountain bike in the display window off its bindings. The bike was inching forward, ready to drop to ground level. Beta twitched and frightened sparks jumped from his face like sweat.
"Ohhh no…" he warned the bike, waving his cannon stump at the teetering two-wheeler. "Noo… Noo… Please don't drop, please don't …"
The front tire dropped to the floor with the crashing power of an SUV. Beta's optics blasted to frightened yellow. "No… No…" The mecha wriggled and spun, trying to stand up, but his fall had left too many injuries. All he could manage was to flip on his stomach and crawl.
The back tire made an impact with the floor. The bike picked up speed and bee-lined for the handicapped mecha.
"Oh no, oh no." Beta started crawling faster, trying to put pace between his body and the wheels of destruction. But it was gaining! The panicky E-Series dragged himself like a seal across ice, but the bike closed the gap!
Beta collapsed from strain, twitching and crying. He had only enough time to rotate his head around and confirm that the bike was still coming.
"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
Amy had to flinch and look away. E-101 Beta attacked her ears one final time with the snapping of metal bones, the crunching of steel cartilage and the squeeeeze-Pop! of mechanical organs spilling their drippy fluids over the floor.
When it was over, she peeked over the railing to see what damage the rampaging vehicle had caused. Amy shuddered. … It was too horrible to describe…
"Tails!" She suddenly remembered the poor boy and rushed back to the store, digging through the mound of balls for the fox. "Tails!" she exclaimed again, once she unearthed his body.
"Amy…" he coughed, sooty and dishevelled from the crushing avalanche of novelty playthings. "You saved me…"
But she wasn't listening. "Look!" and she pointed to a flash of blue light, hunted by bursts of missile tails. "Sonic's in trouble! We have to help him!"
Tails sprang to his feet. "He's heading for the roof! And the super-mechas are following him! I'm wondering if Sonic's trying to pull some sort of diversion by leading a chase…"
"Tails! Let's just shut up and do something for a change! Airlift me!"
The fox's ears jumped and his tails flickered nervously. "Amy, you seem different to me. What happened to you?"
The damsel hedgehog just smiled smugly, pulled out her water gun and spun it around her finger.
"Let's just say I'm in the mood to break the stereotypes."
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Compacted into wheel-mode, the two relentless E-bots were more than able to keep the speedy hedgehog in range. A blue flash would zip by, then the whiz of laser bolts and then the ripping engines of the two gunner mechs.
"Two more minutes…" Sonic grinned breathlessly. Lasers flew past and into the floor and shop windows.
"Idjit! Shewt at 'im, nawt around 'im!"
Sonic skidded to a halt before a door marked Staff Only. This maintenance corridor would take him to the roof, but first he'd buy his friends a few extra seconds.
Epsilon and Zeta accelerated at him…
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
"There! That's the last leg." Stuart dusted his hands off. The skeleton-frame antenna tower now had a bundle of firecrackers strapped around all four of its support pillars.
"Do you have matches, Sensei Stuart?"
The spy flashed the butane lighters he'd picked up and tossed one to the rabbit. "I've got something even better. Once Sonic comes up here, we light the fuses and let this thing fall. Is your pet ready?"
The Chao was currently rummaging through the crate of sparklers and rockets hauled onto the roof, turning the curiosities over in his stubby paws and sniffing and chewing. "Cheese is ready," Cream nodded. The crate was positioned just outside the stretching shadow of the tower, where Sonic needed to stand and lure the mechas into the trap.
Stuart nodded and guided Cream into position underneath the tower. His supervisors would have pulled him out of the field if they knew he was bringing this child into combat, but the spy's intuition told him that no matter how hard he tried to keep children like Cream or Chris – yes, especially Christopher – out of danger, they would only double their efforts to defy him and enter the action.
The rabbit at his side was shivering. The spy's conscience gave him a forceful nudge. "Err, Cream, that was mighty impressive how you stopped that robot. You must be a very brave girl."
"Re-re-really, Sensei Stuart?"
"Of course. You know, my student Chris tells me all about Sonic and the rest of his new friends…" Light flashed across his glasses – he couldn't help it. "… But, I've never heard much about you."
"Mama Ella doesn't like me goin' out ta fight and stuff."
"Well she's certainly underestimated you – I mean, Cream, you stopped that blue robot all by yourself! And you seem to be quite the strategist as well." He knelt by her side and smiled. "And I'm curious… how did you know how to defeat these ultimate mechas?"
"I dunno. I guess I just watch lots of TV."
Just then, the trap door to the rooftop blew off its hinges. Cream and Stuart and Cheese gasped as a fiery blue quill-ball flew out the hole and smacked down on the stony roof.
"OHH!"
"CHAO!"
"MR. SONIK-SAN!"
Sonic was rolling around the gravely floor, trying to smother the flames licking his quills. "Get out of here!" he yelled, singed and with shorter spines. "Stu, they're too much – this isn't gonna work…"
The E-Series were not limited to conventional entrances. Hot beams of light blasted through the rooftop and Epsilon and Zeta rocketed through the concrete!
Fire blew from 104's gun arm. "Yeeee-Haw!" Epsilon whooped as he swept his flamethrower through the air. "Nothin' lake a good ol' campfire under the open stars, heh heh heh!" Sonic just managed to roll away from further burns.
Cream was going hysterical. Stuart clamped his hand over her mouth. "They haven't seen us yet! We have to stick to the plan!"
"But… but…" She heard Sonic's cries of pain once more.
The teacher grabbed her firmly. "Sonic will make it!"
Explosions tore up the roof and sent Sonic flying. His body was so numb with pain; he didn't think he could feel himself scrape across the gravel anymore. He tried standing up…
"Chao, chao!"
Cheese? Yes, he could see the virtual pet, waving him forward. He had to get there…
Zeta screamed. "Geez, just lay down and be destroyed already!" The E-Series marched over and kicked him across the roof. Sonic tumbled over to Cheese. The Chao squeaked and flapped over to the hedgehog, prodding the lump of blue fur, but Sonic did not get up.
Epsilon reloaded. "All right pinko, let's you an' me finish this tinhorn!"
Stuart released the rabbit. "They're moving up close! Go, go!" He rushed to the first leg and lit the intertwined fuses. Ah! The sparks burnt his fingers!
"Chao! Chao!" Cheese was tugging the hedgehog's ear, trying to pull him up, but Sonic wouldn't' move. The ground trembled at the approaching mechas.
Stuart lit the second support beam. His palms were burnt by the effort, though. "Mr. Stuart?" Cream whispered urgently, but he did not hear over the pain in his hands.
Sonic mumbled something. "Chaochao!" Cheese prodded vigorously. "Chao!!!"
Black feet stomped before the fallen hedgehog.
Stuart tried to produce a flame for the third leg. Darn it, his hand was the only thing this lighter was burning! Cream tried again, calling louder. "Mr. Stuart."
Cheese barred his fangs and growled at the robots, but Zeta merely kicked it away. Under the shadow of the antenna tower, he and Epsilon were black wraiths with vicious green eyes.
E-104 toggled his gun arm to flamethrower. "What'll it be, partner? Flash-fried, or slow-roasted?"
"Chao!"
Fire popped from Epsilon's gun barrel. He lowered it to Sonic's head. "Ahm not much of a cook though – if ah ain't careful, ah reckon ah might just burn this here critter."
Third fuse lit! Stuart sucked on his black fingers and made to run, when he noticed the rabbit lingering at ground zero! He snapped out, "Cream, light the fuse and start moving! This'll fall over any moment!"
The rabbit huddled nervously by the last support leg. "Sensei Stuart, I'm not allowed to play with matches…"
A vein in Stuart's head popped. His muscles contracted violently and his glasses filled with spiderweb cracks.
Epsilon laughed. "Hedgehawg flambé, cumin' up!"
"Mama Ella says their too dangerous an' someone could get hurt…"
The spy twitched, the lighter opened, and fire consumed his hands once more.
"GAAAH!!!"
And with that final provocation, all the rage the man had suppressed his entire life blasted out! Adrenaline and anger flew to his head, ballooning it to monstrous proportions! His insides were burning – the murderous flames could be seen in his eyes! His temples throbbed in humongous, square patches and his pupils rolled back until his eyes were demonically pale! And he screamed! And out poured all his rage in red-hot flames of righteous anger! Cream yelped and jumped away as the exaggerated rage of Sensei Stuart engulfed the final support tower, and detonated every last explosive.
CRACK! PSSEWW! KA-POW! Fireworks unleashed their colourful sparklers! EEE-BOOM! Metal warped and snapped under the direct contact of the wiz-bangers and flash-poppers! One leg after the other blossomed with flames and began to creak loudly.
Zeta detected the noise. "Hey, what's that?"
Epsilon stood tall and pulled his flamethrower from Sonic's face. "Ah dawn't know. Reckon we aughta turn 'round an' see what it is, though."
So they turned around. And they looked up. And they saw the antenna tower, once perfectly perpendicular to the ground, now becoming a dangerous imitation of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
And they kept looking.
And the tower kept falling.
And Sonic regained just enough consciousness to see the growing shadow, sweatdrop, and slink out of range.
And Epsilon and Zeta and kept watching, mesmerized like deer caught in approaching headlights.
Epsilon was beginning to have a bad feeling. "Maybe it'll miss us?" he suggested.
E-105 was nowhere as optimistic. Zeta pouted. "I don't like falling things…"
And then the tower crushed them.
The fall threw great sheets of smoke into the air. Sonic coughed and waved the soot out of his face. "Game Over, E-bots!"
"Mr. Sonic-san! You're all right!"
Sonic winced, but he let the rabbit and her Chao seize his waist and squeeze him to death. "Never felt better," he chuckled. Actually, he did feel pretty fresh. His spines had grown back; the singed or burnt pieces of his body had healed over – he was as perfectly healthy as when this adventure had first started.
Stuart joined the group, a little breathless, but looking all right. The hedgehog collected a cordial pat on the back. "Good work, Sonic."
"Hey, thanks for the help today, Stu!"
The teacher rubbed his raw hands and smiled. "Yes, well … I've certainly had my share of excitement for this year." Not to mention used up all my get-out-of-death-scenario-free cards, you imbecile. "I hope you don't mind if I decline to join your next adventure … and, in fact, every subsequent journey you undertake."
Sonic nodded politely. "Sure pal. we'll miss ya, though." You jerk! You can't just leave me with Tanaka and Chuck next time!
"Yes, well, I'm not much of an action man. Maybe I'll just stick to… observing from the sidelines." The light flickered off his cracked glasses.
"I guess everyone's gotta do their own thing. Well, thanks for everything, Stuart." You starchy old hippy.
"The pleasure was all mine." Maniac anthropomorph.
A squeal split the air. "SONIC!!" Amy attached herself like a leech to the blue hedgehog. Sonic paled like a flower in winter.
"Err… hiya Amy." He looked around for an escape route. "Oh, you brought Tails too. How's it goin', little buddy?"
"…" The fox was equally white and stiff as his hero. Sonic reflected that he and Tails probably shared some deep, spiritual bond that let them experience each other's joys and discomforts. Why else would Tails pale so deeply at seeing Amy squeeze his neck off?
"Iyy, um… I'm cool, Sonic." He sunk and whimpered.
When Sonic had finally detached his admires and everyone had positioned into a friendly group, Stuart felt it was right to speak again. "Well, I suppose everything is finished around here. I think it's time we left."
A lonesome guitar began to pluck the air with the sombre determination of the Wild West.
"Whoa!" Tails jumped. "Why did the background music just switch to Spaghetti-Western?"
The safety lock dropped off a gun. "Cause maybe you varmints ain't done 'ere yet!"
Everyone stiffened, feeling an invisible weapon shoved in his or her back. Amy and Cream latched on to Sonic, reducing his mobility. Even Tails and Stuart huddled close.
"Turn 'round! Nice an' slowly…"
They all obeyed the accented voice, and came face-to-face with E-104 Epsilon. The mecha had lost his grasping arm, but his gun was still attached to his smashed and cracked hull. He took an uneasy step forward – his legs had been twisted in the rubble – and looked over his enemies with his one good eye.
"Well ain't this here a surprise," Epsilon snarled. "Not as banged up as yeh thaught ah wus." His left leg twitched and he had to lean on a crate to support himself. Sonic tried moving, but they were all too bunched up! There was no way he could attack or dodge!
The E-Series Cowboy snarled. "Ah may be busted-up, but all y'all gonna be blasted up!" Epsilon tagged everyone with his laser sight – even Cheese. The Chao gave a shocked gasp.
Epsilon's first shot was for the hedgehog. Sonic gasped. "Ohh!" There was no way out!
"Last Requests?" Epsilon inquired.
Sonic looked around for some escape route. Wait a sec… The crate Epsilon was leaning on… it was the crate of explosives Stuart had brought to the roof! The hedgehog made eye contact and bade the teacher to notice.
He got a confirming nod. Stuart reached for his lighter…
"Well, Last Request?" Epsilon snapped.
Sonic grinned. "Yeah, I've got one: I hope you have a dynamite day!"
While Epsilon did a double take, Stuart gave the lighted flamer an underhand toss into the box. 104 Sneered at Sonic. "Now what in 'tarnation was that all about? Yew tryin' tuh be funny, partner? … Hey… why y'all lookin' at mah feet?"
Actually, it was not his feet the mammals were observing, but the hissing sparks from the crate he balanced upon. Oily sweat dripped down Epsilon's face.
"Uh-oh…"
Team Good Guys covered themselves as the entire crate of fireworks erupted in a mega-explosion! Epsilon went sailing into the air, spinning out of control and shrinking into the horizon, yelping something about 'blasting off again'.
But then he was just another twinkle in the sky. Fireworks sailed into the air, pronouncing victory in celebratory explosions of sparkling colours. Everyone gasped, but for the first time that evening, it was not a fearful or astonished gasp, it was a pleasant gasp of wonder.
"Ahhhh."
The sounds of crackling excitement were joined by the hum of twin engines. Everyone looked back and saw the dark form of Robotnik's questionable copyright infringement, The Eggfort Two 2, rising up and hovering before the shopping mall. A green laser fired from its underside, and the ground beneath everyone's feet shook.
"This mall is going to collapse!" Stuart declared. "We've got to get out of here!"
No one needed another thought: The unbreakable bonds of friendship moved the team into action. Cream took Stuart's hand. Sonic took Amy's hand. Tails tried to take Amy's hand, but ended up having Cheese jump on his arm instead. Together, they ran for the edge of the roof, dodging the splinters cracking through the building, and with one mighty push, they leapt!
A fireball engulfed the mall and everything visible in the background. Its shockwaves propelled them out and away to safety. Cream flapped her ears and guided Stuart away. Tails held Cheese to his chest and spun his rotary blades. Sonic just grinned, and by the power of his cool, laissez-faire attitude, he was able to land on his feet with nary a broken bone. Amy smiled and pulled herself nice and tight.
Regrouped once more, Team Good Guys watched the site of their latest adventure burn to the ground, while the Eggfort Two 2 sped into the horizon, carrying Robotnik and his flunkies to safety. A red dawn was rising.
"Well guys," Sonic grinned, "Put down another notch on the scoreboard, cause we won again!"
Cream, Cheese and Tails whooped and punched the air. "ALL RIGHT!" Stuart looked at them all incredulously.
And Amy? Amy's glassy eyes reflected the flickering fires, and were ready to crack under the strain of tears.
"NAAHHH!!" she screamed, falling to her knees and sobbing into the new morning. "You maniacs! You blew it up! And there was a sale on today!!!!"
And as the sun rose, everyone else noticed Amy's predicament, and they all joined in a hearty laugh at her misfortune.
"Is it?" Tails confirmed. "I mean, have we really seen the end of the E-100 Series?"
Stuart crossed his arms and frowned at the burnt-down mall. "I just don't know. You saw how that cowboy survived the falling antenna tower. It could be possible that the others also survived the great calamities we brought down upon them."
Amy wiped her eyes dry. "Maybe Eggman was telling the truth. Maybe they really are indestructible."
They all looked to Sonic, seeking his wisdom.
The hedgehog just laughed. "I say, if those guys really are coming for a rematch, then bring it on! I could use another good work-out like that!"
Amy shook her head. "You don't take anything seriously, do you, Sonic?"
The hedgehog just smirked.
"Well," Tails said to summarize, "Maybe we did beat them, and maybe we didn't. But one thing's for sure: As long as Eggman has that book, things around here are gonna get a whole lot weirder…"
"Pikachu!"
They all turned around and looked to Cream and her cuddly chao sidekick. "Chee-chu?" he offered. Stuart blanked.
Point proven, Tails nodded and joined his friends to watch the rising sun.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>