Review. :D Please? I'll give you a cookie. NO. TEN MILLION CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW SHAPED COOKIES. You can't turn down a deal like that, eh?

Lip Balm

---

I watched him pass by me, boots clunking loudly in the now empty, filth covered hallway illuminated by a number of incandescent light bulbs. Yes, it was him alright. Johnny Depp had decided to pay a visit to a local diner of filthy, smelly people and half decent alcohol. Why he was dressed up as his most successful character was a mystery to me, and probably none of my business. After all, it WAS Johnny Depp that wrapped rubber bands around his tongue to get fired from 21 Jump Street.

Abruptly, Johnny stopped in front of the large rope, that had the smiley face sign standing next to it. Looking up questioningly at the fluorescent lights, he squinted and poked it cautiously, creating it to swing back and forth on the metal chain it was hanging quite loosely from, as ir cast all sorts of shadows down the hallway. A puzzled look occupied his face for a moment, and he turned slightly to meet my gaze.

"Anamaria?" He asked incredulously, gazing towards my direction.

I turned around swiftly, looking to my left and right and seeing if he was addressing one of his friends inside the hallway. But no one was there. In fact, the entire corridor was bare empty, and his question bounced off the walls. It took me a while to realize that he was addressing a character from Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl.

"Do ye have any idea in where the bloody hell we are?" Johnny inquired, pointing a long finger towards the electric light bulbs. "And where's Gibbs…Cotton. Mr. Cotton's parrot?"

Surely this was some sort of joke that was keyed in by famous millionares. Like on Punk'd, it had to be some sort of prank that would cause all different peals of laughter from around the world. I looked around rapidly for something that looked out of place, like a camera or an entire crew of people. Nothing of the sort was seen as I returned the gaze to the famous Mr. Depp.

The tabloids would have a kick out of this one.

"Where is the crew?" I asked with confusion. "And the cameras. Surely you ARE Johnny Depp."

"I don't know where me bloody crew is," he spat with a slight roll of eyes. "And who is this Johnny Depp character I keep getting attacked with. 'ee would never be brave enough to challenge Captain Jack Sparrow, eh?"

I stared at him intently. No, there was no merry joke dancing in the depths of those dark eyes. Captain Jack Sparrow I thought, and immediately began to laugh aloud. Surely this man was a bit quirked in the head and obviously had the millions of dollars stuffed in the empty space between his ears.

"What're ye laughin' about, lassie," Jack muttered quietly.

"Mr. Depp," I said curtly, stifling my laughter by stuffing two balled fists into my mouth. "I believe that all the salt water must have gotten into your head. I don't think that.."

I inhaled another breath as to calm my laughing nerves and look a quick glance towards the end of the hallway. Beatrice, the bothersome waitress was sitting cross-legged on an old, carved bench. She was flipping through a newspaper that had an oddly familiar face in front of it. I exhaled with a slight gasp as realization floated ever so gradually into the depths of my skull. Without saying one word, I practically raced up to the showy waitress and snatched the newspaper from her grubby hands.

Beatrice looked at me in a frustrated manner and reached for another newspaper in a blue crate underneath the bench as I pushed the double glass doors and raced outside.

"Wait, Anamaria," Jack called from inside the hallway, and proceeded to walk out of the doors as well. "Not good! Not good.."

I looked at the paper in my hands with a puzzled expression. Johnny Depp visits girlfriend in France, it read in little letters on top of an article. Surely, that was not the case since Johnny Depp was right behind me, looking confusedly at the paper in my hands. It was quite clear that he could not read.

But France? That was a million miles from where I lived. Surely it was impossible for a fictional character to just pop out from a movie screen and appear in random places. Perhaps Johnny Depp had gotten delusional, grabbed his pirate things, hopped on a plane and came to a random little place. Right here.

No, that couldn't be it. Especially since the date of the newspaper was today. It was impossible. Fictional characters are impossible! He was impossible. Wake up, wake up, I thought to myself, reciting the words inside my head and blinking rapidly.

"Love," said a voice from behind me. I heard a subtle click and then felt a cool tip of a pistol as it grazed lightly across my back. "This shot is not meant for you. Explanations, if you please."

---

[Points towards the little purple button] Please? :D Review? :D