**BY: KUROHIME**
(In a slow - arrogantly slow - movement, the creature that was once two began to twist into one menacing shape. What else can we call it but... the Ultima Mage. I know, I know, but hey, I'm just making this up as I go along, now!)
ZIDANE: Well there's something you don't see every day.
KURO: *tilting her head to one side as he watches* You know, if you squint your eyes and look at it like this, it almost looks like a chocobo...
JESS: *following suit* Nah, I'd say more like Cloud's hairdo.
KURO: *pause* Yeah. Yeah, you're right.
BOB: *nudging Jess - hard* Whatever it looks like, it's heading in our direction!
KURO: *breaking into a grin* I promised you guys we were going to have big luau when we got here, right?
BOB: Well, this wasn't quite what I had in mind..........!
(The words were drowned in a deafening aquatic swoosh as Kuro suddenly steered Leviathan into a gut-wrenching dive. Whee!!)
KURO: I hope you like rollercoasters!
JESS: I don't even like airplanes! Now I'm never gonna ride on a dragon again, either... *pause* ....Bob....! *hits his arm*
BOB: Ow! What?! This wasn't my fault, either!
ZIDANE: *risking a backwards glance* This isn't good! That thing is following us.
BOB: I'm almost expecting the boss music to be playing right about now.
JESS: *her voice laced with sarcasm* I could hum it for you if it would make you feel better.
BOB: *gives her The Look*
(One explosion momentarily blinds them.)
ZIDANE: What the h*ll kind of magic spell was that?
KURO: *trying to steady Leviathan* The kind that's going to annihilate my summon if we don't do something!
(She steers the dragon again to port, narrowly missing another heated blast of energy. On the upward beat, Zidane pulls out a scanner and hurls it towards the Ultima Mage.)
ZIDANE: *after a brief moment* That thing sure isn't human anymore... *sheathes his dagger* ... and this thing is useless. I hope you guys saved up some MP for this.
(Another explosion of magic energy.)
BOB: That's all I needed to know!
(You all know that a Flare attack is imminent at this point, right? Yeah, bay-bee!! It rocks the Ultima Mage momentarily... but a beat later, another, even more menacing-looking blast of energy comes from the Mage's body and heads for Leviathan.)
ZIDANE: Well, that really ticked him off, didn't it?
JESS: *suddenly growing emotional* NO!!
(More from reflex than thought, Jess' energy suddenly congeals into one glowing tendril of hot, white power. The beam shoots through the water and slams into the Ultima spell... uncomfortably close to Leviathan. It takes several moments before the shock wave hits everyone.)
(Back at the insanity that is Kurohime's apartment, Roy and Dagger have managed to, well, start doing some impromptu research. Dagger is frantically going through dozens of save files on Kuro's various Final Fantasy games - hey, where better to find out about summons? - and Roy is on the computer.)
ROY: Now I know why turning on the internet is so cliche in these situations. It's amazing what you can find!
DAGGER: I'm glad that you're having success. I can't say the same. *bleep bleep ka-ching goes the character on screen* I keep getting random battles and Kurohime doesn't have a Gameshark to stop it.
(An Angel Kuro appears on Dagger's shoulder: "Kurohime doesn't believe in Gamesharks. That would be cheating!" Devil Kuro appears on Dagger's other shoulder: "Even if evil is the path that rules!")
DAGGER: *blink* Stop it, you two! I don't need distractions!
ANGEL/DEVIL: Sorry. *POOF!*
ROY: Did you say something?
DAGGER: No, no... *pause* *sighs* Did you find anything?
ROY: Only that I'm he 100,000th visitor to awesome-summons.com.
DAGGER: This is impossible! I've gone through almost all of the games. There's more than eight summons we can chose from. How do we know what to look for?
ROY: Well, maybe we can start by taking a look at the four pendants we've already found. *shrugs, then takes one of the pendants from Dagger* Now this pendant was for Bahamut. What's stopping us from just doing the obvious and calling whatever summon those last two pendants control?
DAGGER: Nothing. It isn't what the summons will be that we're concerned about.
ROY: *frowns, knowing what that means* Right. Do you think they're scattered... around the world, or anything like that?
DAGGER: I don't think they are this time. Those summons have been gathered before.
ROY: The last time ths happened?
DAGGER: Yes. But so much time has passed since then, I don't know if they really have been scattered or not. *thinks* But even Moto and Sakaguchi don't know where the summons are.
ROY: Of course not. That would have made this a really short story.
DAGGER: *turning back to the game* Now I'm beginning to wish these games didn't take so long...
(Meanwhile, off in Inveincible-Shipwreck Land...)
KURO: WOOHOO!! *maneuvers into another wild, twisting set of turns and dives*
JESS: Okay, this isn't fun anymore, Kuro!
(Another Ultima spell jolts them to the side.)
ZIDANE: Hang on!!!
(One quad-9 Thievery, served up hot and fresh! It envelopes the Ultima Mage in wild, firecracker-like explosions. Now it looks like the Ultima Mage is finally taking on a little damage.)
BOB: Dammit, why won't you DIE?
(In a slow - arrogantly slow - movement, the creature that was once two began to twist into one menacing shape. What else can we call it but... the Ultima Mage. I know, I know, but hey, I'm just making this up as I go along, now!)
ZIDANE: Well there's something you don't see every day.
KURO: *tilting her head to one side as he watches* You know, if you squint your eyes and look at it like this, it almost looks like a chocobo...
JESS: *following suit* Nah, I'd say more like Cloud's hairdo.
KURO: *pause* Yeah. Yeah, you're right.
BOB: *nudging Jess - hard* Whatever it looks like, it's heading in our direction!
KURO: *breaking into a grin* I promised you guys we were going to have big luau when we got here, right?
BOB: Well, this wasn't quite what I had in mind..........!
(The words were drowned in a deafening aquatic swoosh as Kuro suddenly steered Leviathan into a gut-wrenching dive. Whee!!)
KURO: I hope you like rollercoasters!
JESS: I don't even like airplanes! Now I'm never gonna ride on a dragon again, either... *pause* ....Bob....! *hits his arm*
BOB: Ow! What?! This wasn't my fault, either!
ZIDANE: *risking a backwards glance* This isn't good! That thing is following us.
BOB: I'm almost expecting the boss music to be playing right about now.
JESS: *her voice laced with sarcasm* I could hum it for you if it would make you feel better.
BOB: *gives her The Look*
(One explosion momentarily blinds them.)
ZIDANE: What the h*ll kind of magic spell was that?
KURO: *trying to steady Leviathan* The kind that's going to annihilate my summon if we don't do something!
(She steers the dragon again to port, narrowly missing another heated blast of energy. On the upward beat, Zidane pulls out a scanner and hurls it towards the Ultima Mage.)
ZIDANE: *after a brief moment* That thing sure isn't human anymore... *sheathes his dagger* ... and this thing is useless. I hope you guys saved up some MP for this.
(Another explosion of magic energy.)
BOB: That's all I needed to know!
(You all know that a Flare attack is imminent at this point, right? Yeah, bay-bee!! It rocks the Ultima Mage momentarily... but a beat later, another, even more menacing-looking blast of energy comes from the Mage's body and heads for Leviathan.)
ZIDANE: Well, that really ticked him off, didn't it?
JESS: *suddenly growing emotional* NO!!
(More from reflex than thought, Jess' energy suddenly congeals into one glowing tendril of hot, white power. The beam shoots through the water and slams into the Ultima spell... uncomfortably close to Leviathan. It takes several moments before the shock wave hits everyone.)
(Back at the insanity that is Kurohime's apartment, Roy and Dagger have managed to, well, start doing some impromptu research. Dagger is frantically going through dozens of save files on Kuro's various Final Fantasy games - hey, where better to find out about summons? - and Roy is on the computer.)
ROY: Now I know why turning on the internet is so cliche in these situations. It's amazing what you can find!
DAGGER: I'm glad that you're having success. I can't say the same. *bleep bleep ka-ching goes the character on screen* I keep getting random battles and Kurohime doesn't have a Gameshark to stop it.
(An Angel Kuro appears on Dagger's shoulder: "Kurohime doesn't believe in Gamesharks. That would be cheating!" Devil Kuro appears on Dagger's other shoulder: "Even if evil is the path that rules!")
DAGGER: *blink* Stop it, you two! I don't need distractions!
ANGEL/DEVIL: Sorry. *POOF!*
ROY: Did you say something?
DAGGER: No, no... *pause* *sighs* Did you find anything?
ROY: Only that I'm he 100,000th visitor to awesome-summons.com.
DAGGER: This is impossible! I've gone through almost all of the games. There's more than eight summons we can chose from. How do we know what to look for?
ROY: Well, maybe we can start by taking a look at the four pendants we've already found. *shrugs, then takes one of the pendants from Dagger* Now this pendant was for Bahamut. What's stopping us from just doing the obvious and calling whatever summon those last two pendants control?
DAGGER: Nothing. It isn't what the summons will be that we're concerned about.
ROY: *frowns, knowing what that means* Right. Do you think they're scattered... around the world, or anything like that?
DAGGER: I don't think they are this time. Those summons have been gathered before.
ROY: The last time ths happened?
DAGGER: Yes. But so much time has passed since then, I don't know if they really have been scattered or not. *thinks* But even Moto and Sakaguchi don't know where the summons are.
ROY: Of course not. That would have made this a really short story.
DAGGER: *turning back to the game* Now I'm beginning to wish these games didn't take so long...
(Meanwhile, off in Inveincible-Shipwreck Land...)
KURO: WOOHOO!! *maneuvers into another wild, twisting set of turns and dives*
JESS: Okay, this isn't fun anymore, Kuro!
(Another Ultima spell jolts them to the side.)
ZIDANE: Hang on!!!
(One quad-9 Thievery, served up hot and fresh! It envelopes the Ultima Mage in wild, firecracker-like explosions. Now it looks like the Ultima Mage is finally taking on a little damage.)
BOB: Dammit, why won't you DIE?