To Dream Again
2.2 Hannah to Susan

Copyright © 2003 Steven Gilks. All rights reserved.

Disclaimer: JKR owns HP. I own the story.

Warning: This story contains descriptions of female/female relationships (femmeslash). If you do not enjoy reading this, please leave now by clicking the Back button on your browser.

The To Dream Again series, by Steve, is an anthology of letters written on someone's leaving day of Hogwarts to someone they've known, been friends with, or even been in love with.

This one, the second in the series, is Hannah Abbott's letter to Susan Bones.

Dedicated to my beta reader, without whom this fic, Hermione's Letter, or my other work would probably not be doing half as well as it. You have my eternal gratitude.

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Review Responses for 2.1: Cho's Letter to Harry

Reviewer: Jacquelyne

My review response: It would be nice, indeed, if what you say were to happen. I certainly wouldn't mind it. Glad you enjoyed the story. Hope you enjoy the new chapter!

Reviewer: ElizabethMM

My review response: I'm glad you liked it. However, To Dream Again is an anthology of letters by definition; to change that would be to change the entire nature of the story. However, if you like my HP writing, I have a fic called Hermione's Letter which is in the conventional story format that you may enjoy. It is available from my FFN user profile page.

Reviewer: pat

My review response: There will indeed be more! I'm happy to see you liked my work.

Reviewer: Neri

My review response: It's nice to see you enjoyed the letter. Cho is a favourite character of mine; this letter seemed an appropriate place to start. I do not believe Cho truly is the girl many people believe she is; therefore, I present my opinion here. Regarding your theory, indeed Cho's presence may have made a difference; she was one of the strongest DA members. But it may also have distracted Harry from his objective, so maybe it was good that she wasn't there… Either way, it would have been interesting to see. I hope you'll come back and read episode 2.2, which is below!

Reviewer: Robin4

My review response: Thanks! J As I stated in my previous review response, I believe there is more to Cho than a stubborn girl, and this is my perception of her. Glad you liked, and I also ope you enjoy the second story, which is below.

Reviewer: tR00 kaNgaR00

My review response: One of my favourite characters is Cho; she's more complex than she outwardly appears. And I too hope he does… although technically I am an H/Hr shipper, H/C isn't so bad, and I would certainly like them to become friends again.

Reviewer: MollyJean

My review response: Thanks for your kind words. I'm not a particular H/C shipper either; my field is H/Hr, but it works here I believe. By 'penultimate' I was referring back to 'year' (as in Cho's seventh and Harry's sixth). Glad to hear you're going to continue reading the series.

Reviewer: Razzle-Tazzle-Tootsie Pop

My review response: We may see a response from Harry, you'll have to wait and see… glad you liked the fic. J

Reviewer: indigal

My review response: To Dream Again was inspired by a song, and then this concept came around. I'm glad you like the idea and the fic, and the next chapter is below for your enjoyment!

Reviewer: kayflyaway

My review response: I'm happy you liked my latest work, and I appreciate your kind words. J Chapter 2 is below… maybe it'll surprise you again…

Reviewer: Ed

My review response: You flatter me! I appreciate the compliment, most definitely, but I'm no JKR. Still, I definitely appreciate that someone thinks I'm that good! J

Reviewer: panuru4u

My review response: I'm honoured you selected this one to read. The next episode is here for you now – I hope you enjoy it as much as the first.

Without further ado – 2.2: Hannah's Letter to Susan!

Hey Susan. Hope you get this before you leave…

For the last seven years you've been my only real friend. We've kept our heads high and marched on in Potions; we've slept through Divination and gardened in Herbology. But more than that, you've stood with me in the hardest of times, you've been to balls with me, you've been the only one who really cared. And now you only have to look at me to fill me with those warm feelings, with that sweet, sweet love that only you can engender in me…

Your thick red hair, your wonderfully brown eyes, your perfectly formed body… You're far more beautiful than even the most radiant sunset; than the clearest waters; than the most wonderful nebulas. You represent perfection to me, and your smile, your delicate face…

The way you look deeply into my eyes and smile brightly, the sensation you incite in me when your soft lips meet mine and caress them gently… You took your time with me, you didn't rush it. You helped built up a wonderful friendship, and we explored our lives together, always comfortably, never a toe out of place, never an uncomfortable feeling, never a single sad moment.

Until now, of course. For that moment we have dreaded for so many years has finally arrived…

We're leaving Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry for what the adults call 'the real world'.

But I don't want to leave this behind. I can't leave it behind. I'd rather be exposed to Crucio for forty days and forty nights than have to go on without you…

How will I live without your smile being the first thing I see every day? Without the gentle touch of you hands on my face as we share an early morning kiss, with the sun's glorious rays pouring in through the small window of our dormitory?

Don't leave me.

Please…

Those nights we spent immersed in the wonderfully powerful warm waters of the Head Girl's bathroom. How you'd smile and then pull me in closer to you, kissing me with your fiery lips, your deep red hair obscured by big white bubbles, and how you'd explore me, gently, softly and with deepest feeling.

How could you forget those times we lay naked under that big tree in the school ground, unseen and unheard, thanks to your marvellous magical talents, simply taking in the sunlight and the moonlight, and revelling in each other?

It started as so much less; we were just friends, just colleagues, nervous first-years starting our magical training. We both had magical parents, but it was so nerve-racking, even for you with having your aunt there to protect you if things ever went seriously astray.

Now we're older and it's so much better; our love blossomed like the trees and those feelings of warmth filled me every time I saw you, lasting for so long after.

How lonely I am, sat here with only my thoughts for company. You're visiting your parents; I'm sat here in our room with no-one to care for me. Hermione has come by a couple of times; she was very comforting. Behind the bookworm lies a far more interesting character. Feisty little thing she is. But she's not you. She can't compare with you.

But you came back to me. I was so pleased to see you again. Your first night back was more perfect that anything I'd ever experienced. You were so sweet. You always are. But that night was true bliss, pure and unspoilt, and nothing or no-one could have changed that, not even Voldemort himself. Our love surpassed all evil, and always will.

Don't ever leave me again, my love…

How did you feel when we were apart? Was your heart wrenched about at night as you lay alone without a warm soul nearby? Did your body feel empty, even when you knew your stomach was full? Did your eyes fail to sparkle when you looked at yourself in the mirror? Did music sound bland and unmoving when you tried to remind yourself of the times we shared?

I hope we're not going to lose each other again. About to leave this place where we've nurtured our love. But please tell me we can stay together. Please don't tell me you want us to break up.

How can I survive without your gentle touch each morning? Without that smile, so powerful it outmatches Avada Kedavra?

Even though our term's over here, a new, even brighter one can begin…

We've begun our lives together. Let's end them together too.

You do still enjoy those moonlit strolls we take don't you? We could have many, many more of them. There's nothing that says we have to go far – we can stay in Hogsmeade for a while, take a break, live our love…

You filled my life with light and you forever will. Say you'll be my light in a world threatened by darkness…

Susan… stay with me…

I want you to be mine, forever, and always.

And I want to be the one for you, the one who's always there for you, the one you can hold in your arms, the one that'll hold you, the one that is truly yours.

Nothing will stand in our way. Voldemort, work, magic, Quidditch, nothing. All I want is to be yours.

Yours today and for every day to come, my love,

~Hannah~