Chapter 1. Our Own Personal Heaven
He felt his life slipping away from him. Even the glory of Valinor, the resplendent home of all those blessed with immortal life, was fading away.
Gimli drew in air as best he could, and tried not to think of his friend's pain. Legolas Thranduilion held the dwarf's hand tightly, tears flowing freely down his face.
The two friends had already said their goodbyes. Gimli knew that he had now come to his final moment.
A reassuring squeeze of the elf's hand. A gentle smile. A sigh. And then… darkness. Quiet. Calm.
For Gimli, the light around him faded away, as did the pain and weariness of mortal life. He felt at peace. The fear he had expected never came, and he was ready to embrace whatever fate Mandos had ordained for the mortals of the world.
In the distance, the dwarf could see a faint light. The light slowly, gradually expanded, and the soothing darkness around him faded away to be replaced with the equally soothing glow.
Had he been alive, his heart would have stopped at what he heard next.
"Gimli!"
Gimli spun around. "Aragorn?" he whispered. "How… how can this be?"
The former King of Men stood before the dwarf, looking as he had in the days of his youth. He shook his head.
"Who am I to explain the work of the Valar?" he replied. "I had always thought that the fate of mortals after death was oblivion… but instead I find that here, after death, we are very much alive!"
"We?" Gimli said breathlessly. "Surely you can't mean…?"
"Gimli!"
The dwarf closed his eyes briefly as he felt tears forming. Around him he saw his friends of old, friends to whom he had said farewell many years before. Aragorn. Merry. Pippin. Frodo and Sam. Boromir.
He laughed. "I didn't think I would ever see any of you again! Where… where are the others?"
"They're waiting for us, but this is a time for the Fellowship," Frodo explained, clapping the dwarf on the back.
Gimli looked at the Ringbearer and smiled. "It does me good to see you whole and healthy again, Frodo."
"It does me good as well, Gimli."
When the euphoria of the reunion had faded into contentment and happiness, the mortal members of the fellowship peppered Gimli with questions.
"Valinor… what was it like?" Merry asked eagerly. "Frodo and Sam never tell us enough about it."
"It is beautiful. I do envy the elves that live there." Gimli paused as he remembered. "After the War of the Ring, I did not think it was possible that there would ever be a place as peaceful as Valinor was. I will forever be grateful to Legolas for bringing me there to spend the last years of my life in true peace."
"Legolas." Aragorn whispered the name to himself. "Legolas…"
Gimli sighed. "Legolas… the only reason that I was reluctant to embrace death earlier."
"He did not take it well." Frodo said it as a statement of fact, not a question.
"No, he did not," Gimli said sadly. He looked at Aragorn. "I thought I would lose him when you died, Aragorn lad. I am grateful for being allowed entrance to Valinor, because it gave Legolas the chance to flee Middle Earth. I do not think he would have been able to leave me behind."
"Lose him?" Boromir asked.
"Elves can die of grief, Boromir," Aragorn explained. "But they would not come here if they died, I think. They would go to the Halls of Waiting, unless they were in special circumstances with the Valar."
"It must be hard, being immortal," Gimli mused. "For awhile I envied him, but now I think that I would not like to live forever. It would get wearying, even life in Valinor. There is still strife and pain."
"But here," Merry laughed, "you don't have to see anyone you don't wish to see."
"It's a different sort of existence here, Gimli, if you take my meaning," Sam explained. "What we see is shaped by what we want to see; that's what I think."
"And I think you are right, my friend," Aragorn agreed. "It's our own personal heaven. Everything we could ever want is here. Everything." He paused. "Well…"
"I should like to see Legolas again," Pippin mused. "And Gandalf. Old Gandalf! He'd probably just call me a 'fool of a Took.'"
"I should like to see them as well, Pippin," Aragorn agreed. He frowned slightly. "How can they bear it, seeing all of us fade from the world? I cried, mourned, raged and grieved when friends died, but in my heart I knew that the grief would fade, and that soon the pain of their loss would fade away as I joined them in the afterlife, whatever that was. But for them…"
"It never goes away," Gimli said quietly.
"Surely it fades in time," Sam mused. "Not to say that he won't miss us, but aren't there others there in Valinor to fill the gap in his life? Folk there are certainly friendly, in the elvish sort of way."
"They are," Frodo agreed. "But it seems to me that elves are different in the way they perceive relationships… I doubt that the pain of death fades significantly. They value life above anything else… more than any of us do."
Sam shook his head. "This is no way for a reunion to go! We need to celebrate properly. There'll be time aplenty later for talk like this."
Gimli laughed. "Well said, Samwise! Lead the way; I'm ready to test your 'heaven' theory, Aragorn. Those elves don't know how to brew a proper dwarven mead, and I've been wanting one for ages. Never had the heart to tell those elves to get their heads of the skies and make some real drinks…"
Aragorn smiled. "It's good to have you back, Gimli," he said. "We'll all miss Legolas, and Gandalf, but I'm glad you're here."
"We really are the fortunate ones, aren't we?" Pippin said to Merry as the mortal Fellowship headed off to join their friends. "We don't have to deal with the pain of never-ending life… and we have our own personal heaven."
"Yes, Pippin," Gimli agreed from where he was walking at Aragorn's side. "We are the fortunate ones."
Next chapter: Legolas and Gandalf talk about death, Middle Earth, and come to terms with the fact that they are the last of the Fellowship.