A/N: Well, I managed to crank out another chapter before taking off. Go me. ^_^ The stuff in asteriks about halfway through is a flashback to 1945. (Speaking of 1945, chapters 3 and 4 are written and will be posted before I leave) I'll try to have an update ready to type up when I get back. I think that's it. Hope everyone enjoys Order of the Phoenix, and, in the words of Lady Macbeth, A kind good night to all!
~~~
Albus Dumbledore fought hard to keep control of himself. So it had finally happened. History was indeed repeating itself. Hermione Granger and Severus Snape had finally given in to the attraction that he had seen forming between them for weeks. He should have expected it, but even so, he was still surprised.
Both Hermione and Snape were in a state of shock. It was Snape who summoned up the ability to speak first. "The potion is ready," he said.
Dumbledore glanced at the goblet. "I see that, Severus. Come with me, both of you. Now. Bring the goblet."
Snape picked up the goblet, trying to keep his hand steady. He and Hermione walked over to the door. Dumbledore showed no external signs of anger, but the look in his eyes indicated that he was fighting to keep it in. "Follow me," he said, and started walking.
They walked in silence through the school until they reached Remus Lupin's chambers. "The goblet, please," Dumbledore said. Snape handed him the goblet, and he thanked him. "Wait here," he instructed, and knocked on the door. Lupin's voice bade him enter, and he stepped inside, closing the door behind him.
Snape and Hermione made eye contact, and although both wanted to say something, neither seemed to be able to find the right words. Finally, Snape spoke. "I'm sorry."
"Why are you apologizing?" she asked. "I kissed you."
"No, you just beat me to it."
"Stop trying to take the blame. I kissed you."
"I kissed you back."
She looked briefly at the door, then back at him. "Are we in trouble?"
He nodded. "Probably."
Hermione summoned up whatever courage she had left, looked at him, and said, "It was worth it."
Much to her dismay, he smiled at her. "Yes, it was."
They were just about to kiss again when the door to Lupin's chambers opened and Dumbledore stepped back out into the hall. He cleared his throat loudly, and Snape and Hermione quickly put some distance between themselves. The headmaster looked at Hermione. "Please return to your dormitory," he said.
She glanced at Snape before leaving, and he mouthed, "I'll take care of it." He touched her on the arm as she walked by him. Dumbledore said nothing.
When Hermione was out of earshot, Snape sighed, looked at Dumbledore, and said, "I can explain-"
"Not here," Dumbledore interrupted. "My office."
~~~
By the time she reached the Gryffindor tower, Hermione was beginning to feel the weight of what had just happened. She kissed Snape. A month ago, she would have never believed that she would do something like that, much less enjoy it. Even in her head, it sounded outrageous. She kissed Snape and enjoyed it. Then she went and almost kissed him again, even though they had already been caught.
Caught... that word sent chills up and down her spine. The headmaster had caught them committing the ultimate breach of protocol. She and Snape had stepped far beyond the boundaries of an acceptable student-teacher relationship. She could be expelled, and he could be sacked. Hermione suddenly felt sick. Would both of their lives be ruined because she kissed him? How could she have been so stupid?
~~~
"Sit," Dumbledore instructed when he and Snape arrived at his office. Snape sat down in a large leather armchair. Dumbledore remained standing, and began pacing back and forth, mumbling to himself. Finally, he stopped, and looked at Snape. "I don't know where to begin."
"Then let me," Snape said. "I'm going to be completely honest with you, Headmaster. I wish I could say that I'm sorry for what I did, but I can't, because I'm not. I kissed her, and I loved every second of it."
"I gathered that. You do realize what this means, don't you?"
Snape sighed. "Yes, I do. But please - don't expel her. I'll resign. I'll never come back here again. Just don't expel her."
"I'm not going to expel her, Severus, and your job is just as secure as ever."
Snape was puzzled. "What?"
Dumbledore nodded. "That's right. You know as well as I do that I could remove both of you from Hogwarts forever, but I will do no such thing." He sighed and glanced at the ceiling. "I will not be a hypocrite."
Snape instantly knew what Dumbledore was talking about. "Minerva."
"Exactly." Even now, over fifty years later, he remembered every detail about the moment when he confessed his feelings for his student to the headmaster, every single word exchanged between himself and Dippet. He'd figured Dippet would find out eventually, and it was better to do it this way than let him discover on his own...
*** Dumbledore sighed and tapped his fingers against his knees. It was too late to back out now. The only choice he had was to go on and hope for the best.
Dippet stopped writing, set his quill down, and looked at his friend and colleague. "What was it you wanted to tell me, Albus?"
Dumbledore sighed again, stood up, and started walking toward the desk. "I'm in love."
Dippet smiled. "Albus, that's wonderful."
Dumbledore shook his head. "No, it's not. She's a student."
The headmaster's expression changed from happy to a look of shock mixed with realization. "Minerva McGonagall."
"Yes." He stopped walking, turned around, and went back to the chair. "I can't help it, Armando," he said, sitting down again. "She's... I don't even know where to begin. I had no idea it was possible to feel this way about another human being. I don't know how or why, but when I'm with her, I feel... complete."
"I get the idea. Does she feel the same way about you?"
Dumbledore closed his eyes and nodded.
"How long has this been going on?"
"Three months."
"Three months," Dippet repeated. He sighed. "You leave me with only one choice."
"Armando, we're engaged. No matter what you do, you won't seperate us. Where she goes, I go."
Dippet studied him for a few moments. "You're really willing to give up everything for her?"
"Yes."
"Like I said, you leave me with only one choice," said Dippet. "You've managed to keep this secret for three months. Keep it under wraps for the rest of her time at Hogwarts. After that, you can do what you please."
Dumbledore couldn't believe his ears. "You mean..."
Dippet nodded. "It hasn't affected your professional performance that I've seen, and since you're obviously not going to end your relationship with her, this is our only choice. Maintain the secrecy. If anyone even begins to suspect something-"
"They won't," Dumbledore said quickly. "No one will know."
"Good. Now get out of here before I change my mind." He smiled to himself and went back to writing.
Dumbledore felt like dancing. He stood up and walked over to the door. Just before he opened it, though, he turned around and looked at the headmaster. "Armando?"
Dippet looked up.
"You're not going to tell anyone, are you?"
"Of course not," Dippet said. "You know me better than that." Just then, something else occured to him. "Albus, don't tell Indira. Ever."
Dumbledore smiled. "Don't worry." ***
Dumbledore's mind returned to the moment, and he looked at Snape. "How long has this been going on?"
"About ten minutes."
Dumbledore stopped walking and sat down in a chair next to Snape's. "You and Miss Granger aren't the only ones breaking the rules right now," he said. "I am going to allow this to continue because I did the same thing. It would be hypocrisy if I didn't."
Snape was stunned. His entire life had changed in the timespan of a few minutes. He was sure it was all over when Dumbledore walked in on them, and now, here was the headmaster saying he was going to allow whatever they had to continue. A relationship with his student. A month ago, he would have cursed himself just for thinking about something like that. But now...
"You do understand that this will be conditional," Dumbledore said. "You must maintain complete secrecy. No one can know of this."
"What about-" Snape began.
"I will tell Minerva when I feel the time is right," Dumbledore interrupted, sensing what Snape was about to say. "She's been in this situation, too, but I don't think she'll take it as..." He paused, searching for the right word. "... well as I am."
Snape nodded. "All right." He still couldn't believe it. One kiss didn't mean a lifetime together, but somehow, he knew it wasn't a fluke. She was brilliant. She was powerful. She liked potion making and Shakespeare. At this point, he didn't care that she was a Muggle-born Gryffindor twenty years younger than him. And the headmaster was going to allow him to pursue a relationship with her, providing, of course, that it remained secret. He had to be dreaming.
"You're not dreaming," said Dumbledore.
Snape looked at him. "Can you read minds or something?"
Dumbledore smiled for the first time since catching them. "I am capable, yes, but I see no reason to do so when it's practically written all over your face."
Snape sighed and ran his hands through his hair absentmindedly. "I know it's crazy, but the thing is, it feels right. I can't explain why. I mean, for starters, she's twenty years younger than me..."
"I'm eighty years older than my wife, Severus," Dumbledore pointed out. "You think that didn't turn some heads?"
Snape couldn't think of a reply to that one.
"Send her an owl," Dumbledore instructed. "Tell her what I have told you, and then let me know whether or not the two of you believe you have something. If this is for real, we certainly aren't going to let a little thing like rules stop it, are we?"
He shook his head. "No, we're not."
~~~
After arriving at the Gryffindor tower, Hermione went up to her dormitory, laid down on her bed, and stared at the ceiling, blinking about once every forty seconds. When she did blink, it was only to hold back tears. In many ways, it was good that they had been caught by Dumbledore and not someone else; Dumbledore was much more understanding than most, and besides, he had been in a situation almost identical to theirs. But would he allow them to start something? And what about Snape? Hermione was willing (much to her dismay), but she didn't know if he would be, too. And if not, would she ever be able to look him in the eyes again?
Six blinks later, she heard a tapping sound on the window next to her bed. She sat up, realized her eyes were extremely dry, and blinked rapidly to rehydrate them. When she could see clearly again, she leaned over, lifted the latch on the window, and pushed it open. A small brown owl with a piece of paper tied to its leg flew in. It was a note, and it was from Snape.
Hermione opened the drawer of her nightstand and searched for something to give the bird. She didn't have any owl treats, owing to the fact that she didn't have an owl, but spotted an opened bag of cat treats. She didn't think Crookshanks would miss one, so she offered it to the owl. It hesitated at first, but decided to take it anyway, and then flew away.
Hermione's heart raced as read the note. Snape had written it so quickly that it was almost illegible, but after spending so much time working with him on the play, she had gotten rather good at deciphering his handwriting. "Dumbledore will allow it, providing we keep it secret," the note said. "If your answer is yes, meet me at the top of the Astronomy tower at nine o'clock. If your answer is no, then don't go, and we'll continue with life as if it never happened. Here is mine: let me enfold thee and hold thee to my heart. S.S."
She glanced at her watch. It was a quarter to nine. Fifteen minutes was more than enough time to get to the top of the Astronomy tower, but there was no harm in being early.
~~~
Snape was already there when she arrived. He was standing next to a window, gazing out at the starry sky above. He heard her coming and turned away from the window. For almost a full minute, they just looked at each other, neither speaking nor moving. It was Hermione who finally broke the silence. "Hi," she said.
"Hi," he returned.
Another silence followed. Suddenly, Hermione walked over to him and began talking very quickly. "I can't believe you quoted King Duncan," she said. "I mean, come on; he was talking to Banquo when he said that."
"Fine, then." He took her hands in his and cleared his throat. "If I profane with my unworthiest hand this holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: my lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss."
She smiled. "That's not Macbeth."
"I know."
He leaned in to kiss her, but at the last second, she turned her head away and said, "Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this; for saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss."
"Have not saints lips, and holy palmers, too?" he asked, unable to fight back a grin.
"Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer."
"O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do! They pray; grant thou, lest faith turn to despair."
"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake."
"Then move not while my prayer's effects I take. Thus from thy lips, by thine my sin is purged."
Hermione allowed him to kiss her this time, and when it ended, she said, "Then have my lips the sin that they have took."
"Sin from my lips?" Snape said. "O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again."
They kissed again. "Thinking R and J for next time?" she asked when it was over.
He shook his head. "No; never really liked that one. Not quite as frustrating as Hamlet, but close."
She smiled and nodded. "But did Shakespeare ever write anything that wasn't frustrating?"
"And why are we talking about this now?"
"Well, what would you rather talk about?"
He stroked her hair, then kissed her on the forehead and said, "Why talk at all?"
No further words were exchanged between them until good night almost an hour later.
~~~
Albus Dumbledore fought hard to keep control of himself. So it had finally happened. History was indeed repeating itself. Hermione Granger and Severus Snape had finally given in to the attraction that he had seen forming between them for weeks. He should have expected it, but even so, he was still surprised.
Both Hermione and Snape were in a state of shock. It was Snape who summoned up the ability to speak first. "The potion is ready," he said.
Dumbledore glanced at the goblet. "I see that, Severus. Come with me, both of you. Now. Bring the goblet."
Snape picked up the goblet, trying to keep his hand steady. He and Hermione walked over to the door. Dumbledore showed no external signs of anger, but the look in his eyes indicated that he was fighting to keep it in. "Follow me," he said, and started walking.
They walked in silence through the school until they reached Remus Lupin's chambers. "The goblet, please," Dumbledore said. Snape handed him the goblet, and he thanked him. "Wait here," he instructed, and knocked on the door. Lupin's voice bade him enter, and he stepped inside, closing the door behind him.
Snape and Hermione made eye contact, and although both wanted to say something, neither seemed to be able to find the right words. Finally, Snape spoke. "I'm sorry."
"Why are you apologizing?" she asked. "I kissed you."
"No, you just beat me to it."
"Stop trying to take the blame. I kissed you."
"I kissed you back."
She looked briefly at the door, then back at him. "Are we in trouble?"
He nodded. "Probably."
Hermione summoned up whatever courage she had left, looked at him, and said, "It was worth it."
Much to her dismay, he smiled at her. "Yes, it was."
They were just about to kiss again when the door to Lupin's chambers opened and Dumbledore stepped back out into the hall. He cleared his throat loudly, and Snape and Hermione quickly put some distance between themselves. The headmaster looked at Hermione. "Please return to your dormitory," he said.
She glanced at Snape before leaving, and he mouthed, "I'll take care of it." He touched her on the arm as she walked by him. Dumbledore said nothing.
When Hermione was out of earshot, Snape sighed, looked at Dumbledore, and said, "I can explain-"
"Not here," Dumbledore interrupted. "My office."
~~~
By the time she reached the Gryffindor tower, Hermione was beginning to feel the weight of what had just happened. She kissed Snape. A month ago, she would have never believed that she would do something like that, much less enjoy it. Even in her head, it sounded outrageous. She kissed Snape and enjoyed it. Then she went and almost kissed him again, even though they had already been caught.
Caught... that word sent chills up and down her spine. The headmaster had caught them committing the ultimate breach of protocol. She and Snape had stepped far beyond the boundaries of an acceptable student-teacher relationship. She could be expelled, and he could be sacked. Hermione suddenly felt sick. Would both of their lives be ruined because she kissed him? How could she have been so stupid?
~~~
"Sit," Dumbledore instructed when he and Snape arrived at his office. Snape sat down in a large leather armchair. Dumbledore remained standing, and began pacing back and forth, mumbling to himself. Finally, he stopped, and looked at Snape. "I don't know where to begin."
"Then let me," Snape said. "I'm going to be completely honest with you, Headmaster. I wish I could say that I'm sorry for what I did, but I can't, because I'm not. I kissed her, and I loved every second of it."
"I gathered that. You do realize what this means, don't you?"
Snape sighed. "Yes, I do. But please - don't expel her. I'll resign. I'll never come back here again. Just don't expel her."
"I'm not going to expel her, Severus, and your job is just as secure as ever."
Snape was puzzled. "What?"
Dumbledore nodded. "That's right. You know as well as I do that I could remove both of you from Hogwarts forever, but I will do no such thing." He sighed and glanced at the ceiling. "I will not be a hypocrite."
Snape instantly knew what Dumbledore was talking about. "Minerva."
"Exactly." Even now, over fifty years later, he remembered every detail about the moment when he confessed his feelings for his student to the headmaster, every single word exchanged between himself and Dippet. He'd figured Dippet would find out eventually, and it was better to do it this way than let him discover on his own...
*** Dumbledore sighed and tapped his fingers against his knees. It was too late to back out now. The only choice he had was to go on and hope for the best.
Dippet stopped writing, set his quill down, and looked at his friend and colleague. "What was it you wanted to tell me, Albus?"
Dumbledore sighed again, stood up, and started walking toward the desk. "I'm in love."
Dippet smiled. "Albus, that's wonderful."
Dumbledore shook his head. "No, it's not. She's a student."
The headmaster's expression changed from happy to a look of shock mixed with realization. "Minerva McGonagall."
"Yes." He stopped walking, turned around, and went back to the chair. "I can't help it, Armando," he said, sitting down again. "She's... I don't even know where to begin. I had no idea it was possible to feel this way about another human being. I don't know how or why, but when I'm with her, I feel... complete."
"I get the idea. Does she feel the same way about you?"
Dumbledore closed his eyes and nodded.
"How long has this been going on?"
"Three months."
"Three months," Dippet repeated. He sighed. "You leave me with only one choice."
"Armando, we're engaged. No matter what you do, you won't seperate us. Where she goes, I go."
Dippet studied him for a few moments. "You're really willing to give up everything for her?"
"Yes."
"Like I said, you leave me with only one choice," said Dippet. "You've managed to keep this secret for three months. Keep it under wraps for the rest of her time at Hogwarts. After that, you can do what you please."
Dumbledore couldn't believe his ears. "You mean..."
Dippet nodded. "It hasn't affected your professional performance that I've seen, and since you're obviously not going to end your relationship with her, this is our only choice. Maintain the secrecy. If anyone even begins to suspect something-"
"They won't," Dumbledore said quickly. "No one will know."
"Good. Now get out of here before I change my mind." He smiled to himself and went back to writing.
Dumbledore felt like dancing. He stood up and walked over to the door. Just before he opened it, though, he turned around and looked at the headmaster. "Armando?"
Dippet looked up.
"You're not going to tell anyone, are you?"
"Of course not," Dippet said. "You know me better than that." Just then, something else occured to him. "Albus, don't tell Indira. Ever."
Dumbledore smiled. "Don't worry." ***
Dumbledore's mind returned to the moment, and he looked at Snape. "How long has this been going on?"
"About ten minutes."
Dumbledore stopped walking and sat down in a chair next to Snape's. "You and Miss Granger aren't the only ones breaking the rules right now," he said. "I am going to allow this to continue because I did the same thing. It would be hypocrisy if I didn't."
Snape was stunned. His entire life had changed in the timespan of a few minutes. He was sure it was all over when Dumbledore walked in on them, and now, here was the headmaster saying he was going to allow whatever they had to continue. A relationship with his student. A month ago, he would have cursed himself just for thinking about something like that. But now...
"You do understand that this will be conditional," Dumbledore said. "You must maintain complete secrecy. No one can know of this."
"What about-" Snape began.
"I will tell Minerva when I feel the time is right," Dumbledore interrupted, sensing what Snape was about to say. "She's been in this situation, too, but I don't think she'll take it as..." He paused, searching for the right word. "... well as I am."
Snape nodded. "All right." He still couldn't believe it. One kiss didn't mean a lifetime together, but somehow, he knew it wasn't a fluke. She was brilliant. She was powerful. She liked potion making and Shakespeare. At this point, he didn't care that she was a Muggle-born Gryffindor twenty years younger than him. And the headmaster was going to allow him to pursue a relationship with her, providing, of course, that it remained secret. He had to be dreaming.
"You're not dreaming," said Dumbledore.
Snape looked at him. "Can you read minds or something?"
Dumbledore smiled for the first time since catching them. "I am capable, yes, but I see no reason to do so when it's practically written all over your face."
Snape sighed and ran his hands through his hair absentmindedly. "I know it's crazy, but the thing is, it feels right. I can't explain why. I mean, for starters, she's twenty years younger than me..."
"I'm eighty years older than my wife, Severus," Dumbledore pointed out. "You think that didn't turn some heads?"
Snape couldn't think of a reply to that one.
"Send her an owl," Dumbledore instructed. "Tell her what I have told you, and then let me know whether or not the two of you believe you have something. If this is for real, we certainly aren't going to let a little thing like rules stop it, are we?"
He shook his head. "No, we're not."
~~~
After arriving at the Gryffindor tower, Hermione went up to her dormitory, laid down on her bed, and stared at the ceiling, blinking about once every forty seconds. When she did blink, it was only to hold back tears. In many ways, it was good that they had been caught by Dumbledore and not someone else; Dumbledore was much more understanding than most, and besides, he had been in a situation almost identical to theirs. But would he allow them to start something? And what about Snape? Hermione was willing (much to her dismay), but she didn't know if he would be, too. And if not, would she ever be able to look him in the eyes again?
Six blinks later, she heard a tapping sound on the window next to her bed. She sat up, realized her eyes were extremely dry, and blinked rapidly to rehydrate them. When she could see clearly again, she leaned over, lifted the latch on the window, and pushed it open. A small brown owl with a piece of paper tied to its leg flew in. It was a note, and it was from Snape.
Hermione opened the drawer of her nightstand and searched for something to give the bird. She didn't have any owl treats, owing to the fact that she didn't have an owl, but spotted an opened bag of cat treats. She didn't think Crookshanks would miss one, so she offered it to the owl. It hesitated at first, but decided to take it anyway, and then flew away.
Hermione's heart raced as read the note. Snape had written it so quickly that it was almost illegible, but after spending so much time working with him on the play, she had gotten rather good at deciphering his handwriting. "Dumbledore will allow it, providing we keep it secret," the note said. "If your answer is yes, meet me at the top of the Astronomy tower at nine o'clock. If your answer is no, then don't go, and we'll continue with life as if it never happened. Here is mine: let me enfold thee and hold thee to my heart. S.S."
She glanced at her watch. It was a quarter to nine. Fifteen minutes was more than enough time to get to the top of the Astronomy tower, but there was no harm in being early.
~~~
Snape was already there when she arrived. He was standing next to a window, gazing out at the starry sky above. He heard her coming and turned away from the window. For almost a full minute, they just looked at each other, neither speaking nor moving. It was Hermione who finally broke the silence. "Hi," she said.
"Hi," he returned.
Another silence followed. Suddenly, Hermione walked over to him and began talking very quickly. "I can't believe you quoted King Duncan," she said. "I mean, come on; he was talking to Banquo when he said that."
"Fine, then." He took her hands in his and cleared his throat. "If I profane with my unworthiest hand this holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: my lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss."
She smiled. "That's not Macbeth."
"I know."
He leaned in to kiss her, but at the last second, she turned her head away and said, "Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hand too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this; for saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss."
"Have not saints lips, and holy palmers, too?" he asked, unable to fight back a grin.
"Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer."
"O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do! They pray; grant thou, lest faith turn to despair."
"Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake."
"Then move not while my prayer's effects I take. Thus from thy lips, by thine my sin is purged."
Hermione allowed him to kiss her this time, and when it ended, she said, "Then have my lips the sin that they have took."
"Sin from my lips?" Snape said. "O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again."
They kissed again. "Thinking R and J for next time?" she asked when it was over.
He shook his head. "No; never really liked that one. Not quite as frustrating as Hamlet, but close."
She smiled and nodded. "But did Shakespeare ever write anything that wasn't frustrating?"
"And why are we talking about this now?"
"Well, what would you rather talk about?"
He stroked her hair, then kissed her on the forehead and said, "Why talk at all?"
No further words were exchanged between them until good night almost an hour later.