Disclaimer: This is not my day to own JAG. Tomorrow's not looking good either.
A/N: You may notice I stay away from anything that takes place after season six. There's two reasons for this. One, I think the writers went stark raving mad after Lifeline. Two, Lifeline was the last episode I saw before the season 9 premiere (I was a summer USA JAG watcher), leaving a three-season gap in my viewing time. I've read synopses, but it's not the same as seeing it, and it makes it hard to write it. (For Jen, who was wondering why I haven't written a coda to Adrift.)
I clap my piece triumphantly down onto the red square.
"King me!"
Harm groans, but he digs out one of the pieces he's already captured and balances it on top of mine. "Now I'm in trouble," he tells me, raising an eyebrow at the checkerboard as he considers his options.
I'd have to agree with his assessment. I've got him right where I want him, and I can't see any way for him to get out of the trap I've set.
"You could always give up now," I offer, grinning.
He gives me a suspicious look.
"What about the bet?"
I buff my nails on my shirt, gazing over his left shoulder.
"Technically it's welching, but I could offer you a deal."
"What kind of deal, Counselor?"
His smile is playful, but I'm in deadly earnest. I'm afraid that what I'm about to do might have lasting repercussions, but I can't just sit around and watch him date these useless women while I play the sympathetic friend. It's killing me.
"We'll change the terms of the bet. All you have to tell me is what you're actually looking for in a woman, since you can't seem to find it anywhere."
He eyes me, still suspicious.
"And I'm off the hook?"
I shrug. "Or you can play the game the rest of the way through and have to give me all the gory details." I'm not sure how we got onto the topic of each other's love lives, but the initial bet was a detailed post-game analysis of all of our ex-lovers by the loser. I really just wanted him to try and come up with three reasons he hasn't dumped Jordan yet.
Harm sighs. "All right."
I don't bother to hide a gleeful grin, and he gives me a warning look. Clearing his throat, he thinks for a moment before speaking.
"'My ideal girlfriend', by Harmon Rabb, Jr."
I can't suppress a snort of laughter, and he throws a pillow at my head.
"First, she has to have a decent sense of humor," he says, giving me an arch look. I shake my head, still grinning, and he sighs again.
"She's got to be able to appreciate how much the Navy means to me, and how important I think my job is." He smiles wistfully, and I know he's thinking about Annie. "She has to be able to handle the fact that I love to fly. I don't want to have to change myself to make her love me. It has to come on its own."
His voice is dropping lower as he continues to speak. I rest my chin on my hands and strain to hear him, even though he's only a foot away from me since we're still sitting in front of the checkerboard.
"She has to understand me. She has to be able to put up with my obsessions."
I smile at that. He told me once that just when he thought he'd never find anyone who understood where he was coming from, I followed him to Russia and changed his mind. I've replayed that conversation so many times in my head.
He gives me a look I can't interpret and then shifts his gaze to the ceiling, hugging his knees to his chest like a little kid.
"She has to be beautiful and kind and loyal. She has to be able to take me on faith once in a while, and back me up when I need her to." He sighs. "Basically, she has to be you, Mac, but in love with me." He gives a little laugh, and I think my heart just stopped. "I don't know. I don't think she's out there."
For a moment all I can do is stare. He's left me the opening I've been waiting for for three and a half years. Have I got the guts to take it and risk losing our friendship?